The Magnetic Lady, or Humours Reconciled (1632)

Edited by Helen Ostovich

INTRODUCTION

Although The Magnetic Lady is a rich and mature work of art in its own right, it is also an important play for Jonson in two major interlocking ways. First, the play allows him what he thought would be his final summing up of his lifetime achievement as an artist and thinker, demonstrating his still vigorous and frequently daring theatrical experiments, social critiques, and range of intellectual interests. These interests intersected with literature, ancient and modern, rhetoric of all kinds, mathematics as a significant agent in the new science, and the performance of social and cultural responsibility in the economy of a nation currently in a tug-of-war over who wields the power: the king or the Parliament, the theorists or the merchants, the law or the church, itself divided. Second, overlapping with the first, the play lets Jonson offer a major tribute to the family of his best patron, William Cavendish, Earl of Newcastle, a man whose ‘virtue’ was not merely of blood, but more significantly of merit in all the fields Jonson considered worthwhile: as a soldier, a scholar, and an artist.

Partly paralysed and in poor health by 1632, Jonson planned The Magnetic Lady as the ultimate work that would integrate his dramatic activity from Every Man In His Humour, later revised from an Italian to an English setting, and Every Man Out of His Humour, his first published play in 1600, up to The New Inn, victim of a hostile audience in 1629 (see ‘Ode to Himself’, Und. 23). Jonson describes all of his plays as following the same principle, with ‘some recent humours still, or manners of men, that went along with the times’ (Ind. 78–9). Having stirred up and exposed the foibles of his age throughout his career, he planned this play, ‘finding himself now near the close or shutting up of his circle’ (Ind. 79–80), as a way of coming to terms with the predominantly urban and sophisticated world he had been depicting for more than thirty years. The subtitle, Humours Reconciled, emphasizes his goal as closure, the debates and practices of his lifetime now at an end. But it was not the end of his dramatic production; it was only the end of Jonson’s experiments in city comedy. Before his death he went on to write the rustic Valentine’s Day love-chase, A Tale of a Tub, and most of the Robin Hood pastorale, The Sad Shepherd, both tributes to the Cavendishes of Welbeck near Sherwood Forest.

The Magnetic Lady bears the hallmark of Jonson’s customary complexity of composition, with busy, often jeering, groups of characters noisily distracting the audience from the secrets of the plot until the moment of discovery. Only a few relatively silent characters (Compass, Lady Loadstone, Pleasance) seem to withdraw psychically or physically from groups to await the success of the plot, carefully set up ‘like a skein of silk which, if you take by the right end, you may wind off at pleasure on the bottom or card of your discourse in a tale or so, how you will. But if you light on the wrong end, you will pull all into a knot or elf-lock, which nothing but the shears or a candle will undo or separate’ (Ind. 105–9). Unity of time and place – being on the spot at exactly the right moment – assists the careful unravelling of the story and its happy end. Jonson’s plot, as usual, depends on at least one level-headed, wittily observant character playing the waiting-game, refusing to panic under pressure, until patience pays off: Young Knowell marries his bride in Every Man In His Humour; Dauphine wins his uncle’s money in Epicene; Face gains control over his master’s house with his master’s consent in The Alchemist; Mistress Fitzdottrell acquires financial independence in The Devil Is an Ass; and everyone in The New Inn regains family connections, thanks to Prudence, the incomparable chambermaid. Similarly, The Magnetic Lady’s hero, Compass, the superior strategist, restores a broken family and marries a worthy, wealthy bride.

The Magnetic Lady, like most of Jonson’s comedies, works on the principle of the audacious gamble in face of often unscrupulous competition. The overt occasion is the birthday party of the heiress, Placentia, but the real concern is the girl’s physical condition (is she green-sick, or is she pregnant?) and the consequent need to get her married off to someone who can be responsible for her and her huge estate. The girl’s aunt, Lady Loadstone, is torn between advice from Polish, the girl’s governess, backed by Keep, the nurse, and from Compass, a mathematical scholar who had been Lady Loadstone’s late husband’s trusted companion. Lady Loadstone is the magnetic figure who draws in guests to help solve the problem: the minister, the doctor, and the apothecary are on hand for recovery of soul and body; the suitors – the courtier, the lawyer, the political under-secretary – arrive to compete for the girl’s hand. Ironside, the morally upright soldier, agrees to participate in his friend Compass’s plan to force the girl’s miserly uncle, Sir Moth Interest, into releasing the inheritance without penalty, although Interest himself plans to marry the girl to the politician with a partial pay-off, retaining the bulk of the money for himself.

The organization of plot follows Jonson’s usual practice of gradually introducing characters in the first few acts to achieve a very full stage by Act 3, bustling with activity, followed by a false lulling of the crisis in Act 4, and catastrophic exposure of the truth in Act 5. So the male guests arrive for the party in Act 1; we meet the women of the house in Act 2, including the two girls, Placentia and Pleasance, and we learn that Compass is in love with Pleasance; Act 3 begins after the guests have gone in for dinner, at which a fight breaks out, and Placentia collapses – in premature labour. The midwife arrives in Act 4, followed by a quick delivery and clean-up, all the women prepared to deny that any birth occurred. But the tension produces quarrelling. Compass overhears Polish and Keep reveal the baby-switch of a generation earlier, when Pleasance, the true niece of Lady Loadstone, was exchanged with Placentia, Polish’s daughter, and he takes the opportunity to marry Pleasance immediately. In Act 5, Compass reveals the truth to Lady Loadstone, forces Sir Moth Interest to release the inheritance, and leaves the fates of Polish, Keep, Placentia, her illicit lover Needle, and their infant in the capable hands of Ironside, shortly to become the second husband of the magnetic Lady Loadstone. The false curve of the plot, represented (as Damplay points out) by the curve of Placentia’s pregnant belly, distracts the audience from the real plot, the truth about Pleasance. As in many of Jonson’s plays, the false plot explodes (this time in childbirth, not unlike the literally exploding experiment in The Alchemist), and the explosion precipitates the truth, which actually arrives from another direction.

The preparation and reception of The Magnetic Lady is well documented. It was readied for theatrical production in October 1632. Before the performance was licensed, but certainly while the production was being planned, the news-writer John Pory wrote to Sir Thomas Pickering on 20 September 1632, ‘Ben Jonson (who, I thought, had been dead) hath written a play against next term called The Magnetic Lady’ (Harley MS 7000, f. 336; Life Records, 85). The book-keeper for the King’s Men at Blackfriars paid the £2 fee on 12 October 1632 to acquire a licence for performance from the Master of the Revels, Sir Henry Herbert, who noted: ‘Received of Knight for allowing of Ben Jonson’s play called Humours Reconciled or the Magnetic Lady to be acted’ (Bawcutt, 1996a, 176). The text was not printed until Thomas Walkley’s F2(3) in 1640/41, grouped with A Tale of a Tub and The Sad Shepherd.

The play’s early stage history is also well documented. The 1632 production at Blackfriars – the only production before 1987 – is satirically recorded in Alexander Gil’s verses (‘Upon Ben Jonson’s Magnetic Lady’) as a notable failure, although Jonson’s friends praised the play and condemned those who sneered at it. Outspoken about politics as well as about theatre, Gil, a junior schoolmaster at St Paul’s School, ran into serious trouble with the authorities in 1628 for his criticism of the King’s favourite, the Duke of Buckingham, and his approval of the Duke’s subsequent assassination. Gil’s attack on Jonson may have arisen opportunely from the lead of two of Jonson’s satiric victims, Nathaniel Butter, mocked as the unprincipled retailer of news in The Staple of News, and Inigo Jones, with whom Jonson had been feuding for years about top billing in masques: who is more important, the poet or the designer of set, costume, and special effects? Jonson lost the battle with Jones, and wrote no more masques for court after 1631. According to Gil, both Jones and Butter came to Blackfriars to jeer the play:

Oh, how thy friend Nat Butter ’gan to melt,

Whenas the poorness of thy plot he smelt;

And Inigo with laughter there grew fat

That there was nothing worth the laughing at.

(Literary Record, Electronic Edition, 15–18)

Although the fifth Chorus of The Magnetic Lady was apparently ‘Changed’ in favour of the ‘epilogue to the King’ that now ends the play, no evidence indicates that a court performance took place. The silencing of the audience at the end of a play is not unusual in Jonson, however. The final Grex (Chorus) of Every Man Out of His Humour (Q1) was also eliminated (although partly restored in F1) in favour of an epilogue which could be adjusted to address the Queen; the chorus of gossips in The Staple of News, the more immediate precedent, has no final say at the end of Act 5. Unfortunately, Jonson could not silence the real audience as authoritatively as his invented ones, judging from Alexander Gil’s response.

Although Gil’s lampoon seems to attack the performance as well as the plot of the play (as an example of ‘bedridden wit’ staged at Blackfriars), his mention of ‘three shameful foils’ (23), a possible reference to the 1631 folio, hotly argued over but never released, suggests that his primary goal is to prevent a ‘paper plague’ (30), the further printing of Jonson’s plays. His particular mention of news-publisher Nathaniel Butter, other printers like Thomas Purfoot and John Trundell, the classing of Jonson’s Works with the output of alamanac-writer Richard Allestree, and the lengthy gibe at how shopkeepers (‘druggers, grocers, cooks, / Victuallers, tobacco men, and suchlike rooks’, 47–8) reuse his printed pages as wrapping paper tell us more about the popular press than about Jonson’s play onstage. Gil also expresses resentment at being told how to respond to a play, and no doubt this feeling was shared by some of Jonson’s audiences, especially those who had been on the receiving end of his satire: Inigo Jones, Butter, and Gil himself, whose father was briefly ridiculed in Time Vindicated to Himself and to His Honours (142–58). Gil’s final mention of the actors Lowin and Taylor might suggest mock-sympathy either for their having to perform in a bad play (Taylor probably played Compass), or, more likely, for being managers of a playhouse losing money on a flop. Lowin and Taylor had managed the King’s Men (Globe and Blackfriars) as major shareholders since 1631. Lowin was probably too old to play Ironside, but might have played a gruff part like Master Damplay or Sir Moth Interest; the only other role he is identified with in the 1630s is the Prologue of The Platonic Lovers (1635), which refers to his thirty years’ service with the King’s Men (Bentley, JCS, 2.500–3).

Otherwise, Gil might be commenting on the trouble the actors got into, possibly for expanding the play with interpolations of their own. Censorship of the play followed performance, although the number of performances in the month preceding this charge is not known. Sir John Pory writes to Sir John Scudamore, 17 November 1632:

The players of the Blackfriars were on Thursday called before the High Commission at Lambeth, and were bound over to answer such articles as should be objected against them. And it is said to be for uttering some profane speeches in abuse of Scripture and holy things, which they found penned for them to act and play in Ben Jonson’s new comedy called The Magnetic Lady. (Life Records, 85)

A year later, the Master of the Revels, Sir Henry Herbert, recorded a settlement of the charge, exonerating his own and Jonson’s competence at controlling staged profanity:

Upon a second petition of the players to the High Commission court, wherein they did me right in my care to purge their plays of all offence, My Lord’s Grace of Canterbury bestowed many words upon me, and discharged me of any blame, and laid the whole fault of their play, called The Magnetic Lady, upon the players. This happened the 24 of October 1633, at Lambeth. In their first petition, they would have excused themselves on me and the poet. (Bawcutt, 1996a, 184)

The intervention of the Court of High Commission indicates that the offence pertained to some doctrinal trespass ‘offensive to church hierarchy’ (Butler, 1991–2, 472), although presumably Herbert overlooked it or did not think it was offensive. The satiric attack on Parson Palate for greed, flexible conscience (marrying Compass to his bride outside of canonical hours), and sycophancy seems merely to recycle literary anticlericalism common since Chaucer, and in any case, the court did not insist on Palate’s removal from the play. But the anti-Arminian (‘worse than papists!’) and anti-moderate or ‘lukewarm’ Protestant views expressed by Polish at 1.5.10–25 were likely to offend Laud, then Bishop of London, who preferred the Arminian programme of formal worship as the route to salvation, rather than Calvinist determinism (Butler, 1991–2, 472–5). Perhaps before Herbert ‘purged’ the script, Jonson had more specific commentary on the Laudian programme, but all that remains are occasional tantalizing references to schism in the church (Ind. 82–5); off-hand references to Palate as ‘our parish pope’ (1.1.87) and to confession (2.4.18); ‘heterogene’ opinions in Ironside’s diatribe on religion or values (2.6.106ff.); snide remarks about ‘doctrines’and ‘uses’ next to a ‘recusant’ preferring ‘French wine’ (3.1.18–21); and Palate’s enthusiasm for the Latin posy in Pleasance’s wedding-ring, about which he promises, ‘I’ll make the whole house chant it, and the parish’ (4.6.54). As Julie Maxwell argues, Jonson’s satire attacks Laud’s policies on elaborate clerical vestments, rituals, and church decoration (cf. Polish’s rage at ‘Their branching sleeves, branched cassocks, and branched doctrine’, 1.5.22). The central event of The Magnetic Lady, Lady Loadstone’s dinner party, is unlikely to be understood, as Maxwell suggests, ‘in terms of a Pauline love feast’, given its offstage location and very different context (Maxwell, 2002, 41–3). But she also contends (persuasively, given Jonson’s love of particular settings), that Jonson directs satire not only at the wealthy neighbourhood located near or on Threadneedle Street and its side-street Bartholomew Lane, served by the parish church known in Jonson’s time as St Bartholomew-Exchange (see 4.6.10–11 and notes), but also at its rector Dr John Grant, a known Laudian sympathizer. Grant had, since 1630, attempted to impose changes on the parish church despite often fierce resistance from the vestry council, who opposed fencing off the communion table and the vicar’s refusal to allow its practical use for parish meetings. The play’s level of particular mockery may have been the cause of the High Commission’s extended debate on the play, at a time when ecclesiastical authorities were trying to silence controversial opinions (Maxwell, 2002, 47–56). On the other hand, the high court’s intervention in the Master of the Revels’s authority and their dragging out the case over a year also coincided with their questioning of several other plays, especially Fletcher’s The Woman’s Prize, which seemed to voice both anti-Catholic and specifically anti-Henrietta Maria opinions about dominant women (Petruccio’s second wife is named Maria) (Dutton, 1998b, 54). The degree of threat here is high, in other words, even though the court’s decision on The Magnetic Lady eventually was forgiving. The second verdict absolving Herbert was a relief because if he had been removed from his post, Jonson, who held the frst reversion, might have suffered the embarrassment of replacing him as Master of the Revels, even though the players initially blamed Jonson equally with Herbert (Dutton, 1998b, 41–2). The actors seemed to suffer no long-term distress for accepting the blame; Joseph Taylor later became Yeoman of the Revels in 1639, serving under Sir Henry Herbert, who apparently retained no hard feelings (Bentley, JCS, 2.596).

This censorship from ecclesiastical authorities demonstrates the degree to which Jonson remained, even in his sickroom, a rebellious critical thinker, getting his digs in despite potential retaliation by authorities more significant than Alexander Gil, a mere gnat beside the hive of legal and political officialdom in London. As usual, Jonson’s plot is largely original, combed through with buried references to his favourite classical sources (Plautus, Terence, Horace, Homer) and explicitly to Chaucer’s ‘General Prologue’ to The Canterbury Tales, which he used as a model for the character sketches of Act 1 and elsewhere (see annotations). The child-exchange, the plotting servants, and the hints of witchcraft are features not only of new comedy (Terence is mentioned in the Ind. 33), but also of popular romance, folk tale, and contemporary theatre. A good model or analogue is Lyly’s Mother Bombie (c. 1591), also closely based on Roman comedy: the local witch eventually elicits the confession of how Vicinia, a wet nurse, exchanged her two children, placing them with different families to give them a better future (Polish’s motive). Ultimately Vicinia exposes her own plot in order to prevent incest and help her foster-children to marry. The money motive here is not greed, but concern for those who cannot care for themselves, and, happily enough, the parents who fostered Vicinia’s defective children agree to maintain them as wards – possibly the future envisioned for Placentia. Another source for stories about changelings (aside from the fairy belief exploited in A Midsummer Night’s Dream) is Heywood’s The Wise Woman of Hoxton (first performed c. 1605); this witch runs a number of businesses that include a health and midwifery service, with a side-market in the adoption of bastards, who might otherwise burden the poor of the parish and destroy the reputations of the mothers. When asked ‘what after becomes of the poor infants?’, the wise woman responds, ‘Why, in the night we send them abroad, and lay one at this man’s door, and another at that, such as are able to keep them; and what after becomes of them, we inquire not’ (see 3.1). This seems also to be Mother Chair’s plan (see 4.7.1–3, 23ff., and 5.10.70n.), rather than the more grisly infanticide to render baby-fat for flying ointment as in Middleton’s The Witch (1616). Midwifery information may have come from Helkiah Crooke, Microcosmographia (1615, revised in 1631), or one of the influential European texts translated into English: Jacques Guillemeau, Childbirth (1612), and Eucharius Rosslin, The Birth of Mankind (1540 and 1545) (see Hobby, 2001, for further discussion of these early texts).

An important theatrical source for Placentia’s undiagnosed pregnancy is commedia dell’arte, where the usual joke (domestic versus university-educated wit) is that the pregnant girl is the Doctor’s daughter. In Flaminio Scala’s ‘The Fake Magician’ (1611) in Scenarios of the Commedia dell’Arte: Flaminio Scala’s Il teatro delle favole rappresentative (trans. Henry F. Salerno, 1967), two pregnant women escape detection: Pantelone’s daughter pretends to be sick with dropsy, and the Doctor’s daughter pretends to be possessed (loosely parallel to Needle’s sleepwalking and prophesying). A physician suggests, like Rut, that the dropsy victim marry as soon as possible to relieve her condition. Arlecchino, in a conspiracy with other servants, disguises himself as a magician who exorcises the household by trapping the two fathers in magic circles and terrifying them into agreeing to two weddings to release the girl’s demon. A variation on the Arlecchino disguise in the same Scala collection appears in another scenario, ‘Flavio the Fake Magician’, in which Flavio, like Compass, uses his superior wit to disturb and then reconcile a household so that he can outwit rivals and marry the daughter. Jonson used Scala’s figures earlier in The Vision of Delight (1617), and was at least aware of commedia traditions, if not Scala’s work, when he wrote Volpone. Medical detail on tympanies, also mentioned in The Cavendish Entertainment (1618–19), comes from Lanfranke of Mylayne, translated by John Halle (1565).

The conspiracy and quarrel among the women partly derive from Gammer Gurton’s Needle (c. 1550), another classically indebted comedy which pits male university-educated wit against female domestic knowledge in a clever plot about a missing needle – the sign of the phallic and economic power binding social relations. Hodge’s torn breeches prevent him from working and from courting, and because of his dependence upon the household economy (like Needle) his future depends on the women’s ability to ‘keep a nee’le’ in its proper place (see Wall, 2002, ch. 2). The association of the needle with pleasure explains Needle’s alliance with Placentia. The pompous interference of Dr Rat (a close homophone for Dr Rut), which ends with his being caught in a privy conduit and beaten, loosely sets up Dr Rut’s violent ‘cure’ of Interest, including the tumble down the well; and Diccon, like Compass, deliberately puts two groups of women at odds before he reveals the truth about the needle and reconciles all the humours he aroused.

A similarly important source is Massinger’s The Roman Actor, performed by the King’s Men in 1626 with Joseph Taylor as Paris, and published in 1629: this play uses a structure of plays within the play, including various onstage audiences who respond, sometimes inappropriately, to what they see. This is especially true of Act 2’s ‘The Cure of Avarice’, imitated in The Magnetic Lady, 3.4 (see 7 SDn. and 32n.): a miserly patient enters unconscious in a chair and the doctor attempts to cure him with violence, loud noise, and opening and scattering his hoard as a way of opening his mind to cure, as Rut does in offering equivocal purges of Interest’s ‘purse’ and other places afflicted with ‘stoppages’. Massinger’s doctor promises, ‘I will cause a fearful dream / To steal into his fancy, and disturb it / With the horror it brings with it, and so free / His body’s organs’ (2.1.324–7), a plan Rut follows with the sleepwalking scheme in 5.5, 7, and 10, which also owes a debt to Shakespeare’s Macbeth. In another structural similarity to Jonson’s play, The Roman Actor develops and concludes with a conspiracy of women who ultimately get their revenge on Caesar before their own capture, unrepentant confession, and punishment. Despite the generic differences between Massinger’s tragedy and Jonson’s comedy, the larger theatrical concepts are strikingly similar in their choices of how to use spectacle and audience response in the service of understanding ideas.

A final significant source for the play is in the Cavendish family ‘romance’: the quest of the younger son of Bess of Hardwick, Sir Charles Cavendish, to separate himself from the horrifically powerful matriarch of the clan and build his own family circle based on affectionate forebearance, close friendship, intelligent skills, and diplomacy, for which his own sons were later renowned. Central to that quest were his friendship with his stepbrother Gilbert Talbot, later Earl of Shrewsbury, and his marriage to Katherine Ogle, the woman whom Jonson first described as ‘magnetic’ (see ‘Katherine Ogle’, 1629, 6.315–16, line 19). The children of that marriage, William and Charles, benefited significantly from their mother’s courage and determination in re-establishing the title to the Ogle barony, as much as they did from their Cavendish and Talbot connections.

When Anne Barton commented on William Cavendish’s patronage of Jonson and their friendship as cemented in a nostalgic ‘harking back to Elizabeth’ (Barton, 1981, 706), she alerted readers to important links with the Cavendish family in The New Inn, The Magnetic Lady, and A Tale of A Tub, as well as in the commissioned Welbeck (1633) and Bolsover (1634) entertainments for Charles and Henrietta Maria. She identified Lovel in The New Inn as a compliment to Cavendish, the soldier and scholar; Cavendish modelled his own play, The Variety, on The Magnetic Lady, with a rich widow as heroine; he also borrowed the jeerers from The Staple of News and a hero based on Manly and Wittipol from The Devil Is an Ass (707–9). But Barton’s insistence on nostalgia for the age of Elizabeth as a new direction for Jonson’s late plays, and on what she sees as his ‘Shakespearean’ mode, seems perversely to ignore Jonson’s consistent values as a playwright and masque-maker. The large gap in Barton’s theory is that she ascribes bardolatrously to Shakespeare what she should be ascribing to Jonson’s interests from the beginning of his career, when he invented the comical satires and developed the antimasque and masque – the revelation of the ideal lurking behind or beyond the reach of earthly and demonic powers who try to destroy it, or at least dismay or discompose it. The original ending of Every Man Out gives a miniaturized masque effect of the sudden purifying power of the Queen: she passes over the stage and in so doing converts Macilente’s envy into profound community spirit. As the plays tended less to focus on the ideal and more to focus on consequences of the real (Volpone, Epicene, The Devil Is an Ass) and the need for toleration in a fallen world (The Alchemist and Bartholomew Fair), the masques developed the stunning contrasts between warm, messy, capering, appetitive life and the cool purity of ideal truth. Jonson’s late plays, like Shakespeare’s, move towards reconciliation, but that is not to say that Jonson was operating in a Shakespearean mode: the masquelike ending of Every Man Out (see Ostovich, 1992) precedes the masquelike ending of The New Inn (see Ostovich, 1997), and in between those experiments, shooting up among the early court masques, are Shakespeare’s masquing variants in Pericles, Cymbeline, The Winter’s Tale, and The Tempest. Both men, probably working from mutual influence through their contact in the King’s Men, played with the same ideas but came up with different theatrical results.

Jonson’s early plays, like his late plays, are part of a continuing experiment that balances the ideal against the real. His nostalgia was not so much for Elizabethan values as for those enduring values that modern fashion tends to discount. He expresses and critiques those values in various ways that hark all the way back to Aristophanes and even earlier playwrights who opened the gates and served as guides to Jonson’s muse. His continuing effort to educate his audiences about the recovery and updating of still pertinent, if ancient, wisdom appears in the Grex of Every Man Out, the complaints of the elder Knowell in Every Man In, and generally in the Aristophanic comedy of the humours plays. The recourse to Aristophanes is by definition nostalgia that pits youth against age, as the older generation tries to hold on to its power. Aristophanes shapes Jonson’s Jacobean comic characters who either, like the middle-aged Volpone, want to relive the power and excitement of their own youth (as when Volpone acted Antinous) or, like elderly Morose in Epicene, try to recover the past by marrying a young, silent, and obedient woman. The impulse reverses in his nephew Dauphine, who yearns for the power of the middle-aged, with their sexual (the aging Ladies Collegiate) or financial (Morose) security. So too in The Alchemist, the widower Lovewit returns to profit from his cheeky servant’s alchemy game by marrying Dame Pliant, who not only enriches him, but also makes him feel spry and sexually athletic. In Bartholomew Fair, Justice Overdo tries (and fails) to restore the sterner morality he thinks he remembers from his youth – just as the elderly stage-keeper of the Induction wants Jonson to revive the clowns and pranks of the 1570s and 1580s. The puppet show of Act 5 does just that – revives Marlowe in a crude burlesque that celebrates ultimately the wisdom of Dionysian theatre. It is not simply the moral interlude demons of The Devil Is an Ass that mark a turning point in Jonson’s career. Jonson had been, in one way or another, harking back and bringing forward anything that sparked his imagination, from ancient Greece and Rome to Chaucer, Lyly, Marlowe, and, yes, Shakespeare – as well as very up-to-date acknowledgements of impressive youngsters like Massinger.

The real mark of difference in Jonson’s late work may be the influence of the Earl of Newcastle as Jonson’s new patron. In the Cavendishes, Jonson found admirers of his intellect, promotion of his sensitivity in his eulogies for members of the Cavendish family, and delight in his masques and entertainments, especially those written for the Cavendishes, The Cavendish Christening Entertainment and the entertainments at Welbeck and Bolsover. He also shared their intellectual interests in the new science, typified in both ancient and current works on magnetism, such as Claudian, Magnes (see epigraph), Gilbert, De magnete (1600), Ridley (A Short Treatise, 1613; 1617), and Barlow (Magnetical Advertisements, 1616; 1618). Jonson admired Cavendish’s intellectual involvement in the new philosophy and science of the day, as for example his mathematical improvements on the art of dressage and his architectural talent revealed in the stable at Bolsover (Und. 53), or his friendship with Hobbes, who later wrote a ‘mathematical demonstration’ for Cavendish’s treatise on swordsmanship (see Raylor, 1999b, and Und. 59). The mathematicial studies of William and Charles Cavendish help to explain the tribute Jonson embedded in The Magnetic Lady.

Why did Jonson characterize Compass as a ‘scholar mathematic’ from Oxford? What kind of intelligence is he defining with this information? The answer turns out to be both simpler and far more complicated than the play’s metaphor of the mariner’s compass which controls meaning in the play (Ostovich, 1994). By 1632, Oxford was a centre of mathematical learning, mostly owing to Henry Briggs, brother of Jonson’s friend Richard Briggs (see Letter 13 and Brock, 1983, 26). Henry Briggs was appointed the first Oxford professor of geometry in 1619 on the basis of his development of John Napier’s gentleman-scholarly hobby, the invention of logarithms (1614). The history of English mathematics in the early modern period begins in the 1550s with Robert Record, who set a standard for the intelligent study of practical mathematics by defending its application to other fields of knowledge in his preface to The Whetstone of Wit (1557) as a kind of key to the ‘castle of knowledge’ housing law, medicine, divinity, astronomy, navigation, and the weights and measures so necessary to the running of any business or institution. Expanding on Record, John Dee’s Mathematical Preface (1570) argues that mathematics provides the logic that informs our understanding of all things physical and metaphysical because we are looking for the lines, planes, numbers, that will allow us to connect concepts and apply a method of comprehension. As a mathematical scholar, then, Compass is able to predict, subvert, or absorb the schemes of all the plotters, representing all classes and occupations, in Lady Loadstone’s house, thus ensuring the ultimate success of his own su-perior plot. Mathematics, as a study of logical principles and practical applications, prepares the mind for anything that requires the processing of relations and functions.

Alongside this mathematical quest to comprehend the shape and functioning of the universe, especially after 1600, was a simpler fascination with the mathematical tools themselves. Although many of the tools (like the mariner’s compass) were certainly used, many were objets d’art acquired and displayed for their beauty and curiosity value (see Oxford’s online illustrated catalogue, Epact: Scientific Instruments of Medieval and Renaissance Europe, which publishes holdings from the Museum of the History of Science, Oxford; the Museum of the History of Science, Florence; the British Museum, London; and the Museum Boerhaave, Leiden). The invention of these tools and the theories behind them often came from ordinary men of middling education and practical experience, who learned their mathematical skills from numerous books, tables, and public lectures devoted to the subject in the post-Record mathematical explosion, and for whom mathematics was both a spur to professional and financial advancement and a pleasure for its own sake. By 1630, Edmund Wingate, in Arithmetic Made Easy, assumes that everyone can work with logarithms well enough to follow his solutions for the calculation of interest, which the reader can then test by solving the following problem (pp. 473–6):

A having a daughter of the age of 3 years, delivers at the same time a thousand marks or 666l. 13s. 4d. upon condition that B shall deliver unto his daughter at the age of 15 years two thousand marks, or (which is all one) 1333l. 6s. 8d. Now the question is, at what rate B enjoys the 666l. 13s. 4d. that it may augment to 666l. 13s. 4d. in 12 years: facit at the rate of 5.19 per centum. For here first I deduct 2,82390, the logarithm of 1333.6.8; this done, their difference is 30103, which if I divide by 12, the quotient is 2508.6; this quotient if I add to 2.00000, the logarithm of 100, the sum is 2.02509, which is the logarithm of 105l. 19s. I conclude therefore, that the 666.13.4 will increase in 12 years to 1333.6.8 at the rate of 5.19 per centum, which is the facit or resolution of the question propounded, as aforesaid.

No wonder then that Sir Moth Interest engages almost constantly in the computation of interest on his niece’s inheritance, working with more complicated numbers than Wingate’s 5 per cent, given that the official interest rate was 10 per cent up to 1624, and then changed to 8 per cent.

The popularity of mathematical problems appears in another phenomenon of the times: the game book. Claude-Gaspar Bachet de Méziriac’s Problèmes plaisans et délectables (Paris, 1612) was the basis for Récréations mathématiques, a hefty volume divided into three parts totalling 350 pages not counting the many tables, first compiled in 1624 by Henry Van Etten, and then expanded (1629) and translated into various languages including English. It offers a variety of problems, ranging from sophisticated mathematical puzzles to facetious logic, jests, and magic tricks. Some problems involve testing counterfeit money: how does one correctly determine which box is full of gold and which full of lead, if they look identical from the outside and weigh the same (1.58)? Such problems resemble Compass’s problem of sorting out which girl is the true niece and heiress and which is the ‘slip’ or false coin. Another problem that seems to pre-echo Compass’s wit concerns circles: which is more difficult and astonishing, to make a perfect circle without a compass, or to find the centre and middle of the circle? (1.86). The answer is the former, as all of Compass’s rivals discover, and as the end of Jonson’s Induction reveals about the playwright’s intentions in completing the perfect circle of his career.

If mathematics had, by 1632, ‘now become a game’ testing the skill of the players (see the first line of the translated dedicatory verse, ‘To the most worthy author’, in John Napier’s Rabdology, 1617, 1990, a text describing three devices to aid arithmetical calculations), it had also become a fierce battle to stake claims on intellectual and economic property. Jonson’s Induction makes clear that the battle also extended to theatrical property, as the Boy’s huckstering (‘What do you lack, gentlemen?’1ff.) within the ‘poetic shop’ indicates. In scientific circles, the ‘magnetic’ rivalry of Barlow and Ridley (see 1.4.5n.), both students of William Gilbert, who wrote the initial study De magnete (1600) in consultation with other scholars, was parallelled by other rivalries in the creation of better tables and instruments of measurement, like the competition between William Oughtred and his students Richard Delamain and William Forster over who should claim to have invented the slide rule (1631–2). The Magnetic Lady presents a broadly comparable situation: several people of different backgrounds and orientations attempt to attain the same goal (the heiress and her fortune), and most of them fail because their narrow understanding of how to navigate through obscure or partly known territory limits them. The real competition, Polish, the inventive governess who represents women’s education, almost reaches the goal first, but she is hampered by her lack of a strong theoretical position. She has the instruments and the practical authority to use them, but her grasp of the larger situation is inadequate, partly because of timing and partly because of miscalculations based on incomplete information. Only Compass, the scholar mathematic from Oxford, has access to theory and practice in many fields – especially the theory and application of magnetism – and the ability to navigate through military strategy (Ironside), divinity (Palate), law (Practice), politics (Bias), finance (Interest), medicine (Rut and Item), and court diplomacy (Silkworm). As a result, he is able to control and compensate for all the competing directional pulls in order to arrive at the destination he seeks: a rich wife. Pleasance Steel’s name says it all. She gives pleasure; and her maiden ‘steel’, touched by Lady Loadstone’s power, is strengthened magnetically, empowering both herself and her new husband to enjoy a secure future. Compass would certainly agree with Robert Record that ‘Besides the mathematical arts there is no infallible knowledge, except that it be borrowed from them’ (O’Connor and Robertson, 2001, Record entry).

Mathematics, however, was the province of men; female knowledge was limited to the basic arithmetic of household accounts, especially multiplying and the subsequent subtracting of child from mother. Such ‘women-matters, / Smock-secrets’ (4.7.40–1) have a three-pronged representation in the play through the midwife, the (wet) nurse, and the governess, who, like the triple Hecate, form an alliance controlling menstruation and pregnancy (the role of Selene, the moon-driver), fertility and childbirth (presided over by Artemis, the moon goddess), and retaliation against men (a Fury, associated with Hecate, goddess of the dark side of the moon) (see Ostovich, 1999, 99–101). Jonson offers a more jocular representation of this trio in Dugs, Kecks, and Holdback, the nurses and midwife of The Cavendish Christening Entertainment, and alludes to Hecate’s power in several masques, from The Masque of Queens (1609) to Time Vindicated (1623). Between 1512 and 1720, midwives were licensed by the Church of England, because of concerns over infant baptism, sorcery, illegitimacy, and medical competence. Their oaths included promises to rely on ‘cunning’ (skill and experience, not witchcraft), to report bastard births, never to harm or switch infants, and to keep delivery-room secrets from men (Evenden, 2000, 24–8, and Cressy, 1997, 65–6). Although Mother Chair seems prepared to bend some of her oaths of office, she holds firm on patient confidentiality until the charge of infanticide forces her to speak out. Her authoritative presence confirms that midwives were respected women in the community who maintained ‘long-term and intimate relationships’ with clients, on whom they depended for repeat business and referrals (Evenden, 2000, 90–1). Although Jonson does run a witchcraft motif through his depiction of the gang of three, the women’s activities merely reveal a female version of male cunning in reaching a desired goal; Jonson never suggests that a male midwife (like Dr Rut) would be more competent or trustworthy (see Sanders, 1999c).

Nurse Keep, by contrast to Chair, seems more sentimental, less rational, responding by feeling hurt rather than acting efficiently in the difficult situation that develops. Although Jonson does not explain the logistics of wet-nursing in the women’s conspiracy, clearly three women had infants at about the same time: the late Mistress Steel, Polish, and Keep. Either Keep nursed all three infants, or her own infant died or was weaned so that she could nurse two; or Polish nursed her own infant, as a good puritan mother should (see Cressy, 1997, 89) while Keep nursed the Steel infant. At some point, Polish decided to switch the infants’ indenties, probably after the two-year nursing period, when she took over the training of the heiress before delivering her fully ‘Polished’ at age twelve to her aunt, Lady Loadstone (1.4.46). Although Jonson does not specify the division of duties in nursing and raising the girls, or why the device escaped detection, he relies on common fears that breast-feeding of an upper-class child by a lower-class nurse permitted the infiltration of class difference that could potentially corrupt English culture. Such nursing also explains why so many children failed to resemble their parents: they suck in the milk of the wet nurse and are re-bred with her worker’s blood, thus eroding the dominant culture, diminished because the nurse has appropriated the role of parent (Wall, 2002, 36–8). Jonson, however, argues for heredity (nature over nurture) in the superiority of the true heiress. If (as I speculate) Polish nursed her own daughter while Keep nursed Pleasance, Keep’s impulse to honesty and her discomfort with personal guilt are partly responsible for maintaining Pleasance’s elite moral instincts, while Polish’s aggressive creation of an ersatz heiress fails because Placentia has sucked in falseness, exposed as aggressive sexuality, with her mother’s milk. As Damplay objects in Chorus 3, 1–3 (see notes), structuring the play on the ‘pitiful poor shift’ of Placentia’s pregnancy and labour makes a negative statement on how women’s physicality overwhelms female intellectual aspirations.

Polish is the most significant member of the domestic triumvirago-ate: she is the governess, the godmother, and the decision-maker who manipulates the midwife and the nurse into keeping the family secret. Her plot combines several strands in the play’s ‘skein of silk’, navigating her course as the ‘fly’ on the mariner’s compass, and, for modern audiences, seeming to co-operate with cultural materialist and feminist agendas to challenge class and gender prejudices. Middle-class notions of education allow her to gain power by accepting that children may be better reared in households other than the ones they are born into, and give her twelve years (1.4.39ff.) in which to train the girls for their life-roles (see Ostovich, 1997, on women’s early education in relation to The New Inn).

Her role in training the girls also places Polish in the position of the cruel stepmother found in folk tales like Cinderella, or its Scottish version, Rashin-Coatie, first printed in 1540. Cinderella stories require at least two girls: one the true heiress, the other an interloper. The interloper gains access to the heiress’s rights through the power of the governess or stepmother, who supplants the true child with her own daughter. The rightful heiress is then degraded in status, usually to the kitchen hearth, her true self hidden from all, until magic means channel the power of the heiress’s dead mother, mitigating the girl’s harsh treatment and ultimately helping to restore her proper place in society. Often this restoration requires the agency of a prince, who falls in love with the rightful heiress, recognizes her virtue in her goodness or beauty, and offers to marry her. The secret recognition and betrothal while Cinderella is still in her humble state seems to be vital to the tale as the magic that ensures she can permanently escape her servitude.

In Jonson’s play, Pleasance (the Cinderella) has been displaced by Placentia as the Steel heiress. Instead of a pet calf or a fairy godmother, the magic resides in the Steel family genes and the magnetic metaphor, represented by Lady Loadstone, which ensures that true steel, magnetized by the loadstone, draws the true prince, Compass, to her rescue. Compass’s humanist cunning as an Oxford scholar mathematic allows him to figure out the plot and defeat the domestic cunning of Polish and her circle. Polish tries to get rid of Pleasance by locking her into an ‘old bottle-house / Where they scraped trenchers’ (5.9.49), until Polish can marry Placentia off to a wealthy husband, but Compass locates Pleasance and restores her to her rights – by law, not by the magic test of silk shoe or glass slipper. Although Polish jeers that Compass ‘has fished fair and caught a frog’ (5.2.4), magically the frog he kisses turns out to be a bride whose wealth and beauty give the tale its happy ending.

Jonson prepares his audience for that happy ending in two ways: through the discussions of the play in the Chorus, and through the analogy to Cavendish family history. The Boy tells his audience in the Induction that Jonson, ‘finding himself now near the close or shutting up of his circle, hath fancied to himself in idea this magnetic mistress’ (Ind. 79–81). Jonson first used ‘magnetic’ in its figurative sense in his ‘Epitaph on Katherine, Lady Ogle’ (1629) to describe this mathematically perfect lady whose ‘just symmetry, / In number, measure, or degree / Of weight, or fashion’ (6.315–16, lines 22–4), defined not only an inspiring figure for her family, but also an exemplar for the entire world: ‘All circles had their spring and end / In her, and what could perfect be, / Or without angles, it was she!’ (14–16). Jonson may have met Katherine (Ogle) Cavendish during his journey to Scotland, when he may have stopped at Welbeck Abbey, since he had been asked to write the inscription for the plaque on her husband’s monument at Bolsover. Since then, he might have met her while preparing The Cavendish Christening Entertainment, a celebration commissioned from Jonson by her elder son William for the christening of her grandson or great-nephew Charles Cavendish (that is, either the son of Newcastle or of his cousin the second Earl of Devonshire; no record identifies the child, but both men had sons at about the same time). Perhaps a further occasion of meeting was after the death of Katherine’s older sister Jane, for whom Jonson wrote a memorial poem (‘To the Memory of that Most Honoured Lady Jane, Eldest Daughter to Cuthbert, Lord Ogle, and Countess of Shrewsbury’, 5.715).

Doubtless, Jonson had heard stories about Katherine and her husband Sir Charles Cavendish of Welbeck, whether from his patron or from other sources, that inspired him to write a play loosely praising herself, her husband, and their sons. Katherine Ogle, the younger daughter of the wealthy northern baron of Bothal, Sir Cuthbert Ogle, had apparently lost her right to her father’s barony when it fell into abeyance between Jane and herself for lack of a male heir. Although their mother continued to live at Bothal until her death in 1622/3, Jane (Ogle) Talbot, later Countess of Shrewsbury, failed in her petition to James for the title in 1606; no record exists of any earlier petition to Elizabeth. After Jane’s death in 1625, Katherine, now sole heir, petitioned Charles I, from whom she ‘obtained special letters patents . . . bearing date the 4th of December, in the 4th year of his reign [1628], declaring her to be Baroness Ogle, of Ogle in Com. Northumberland, as also ratifying that title of honour to her and her heirs forever’ (Cokayne, 1945, 10.37). Although the 1591 marriage between Katherine Ogle and Sir Charles Cavendish was evidently arranged, it was apparently a loving one, and very likely the two knew each other before their wedding as part of the extended Cavendish–Talbot clan, since Jane had married Charles’s stepbrother Edward Talbot in 1583, and Charles himself was particularly close to his older stepbrother/brother-in-law Gilbert Talbot. The Talbots’ sister Mary later married Jonson’s other long-term patron, the Earl of Pembroke; Jonson knew Mary Talbot well enough to tease her about the status of wives, and write a poem as ‘penance’ (see Forest 7).

Given that the Cavendishes were a very clannish clan, with close ties to extended family and important places at court, thanks to their ambitious matriarch Bess of Hardwick, Jonson had ample opportunity to have heard about Sir Charles Cavendish of Welbeck’s exploit of 1599, an incident so swashbuckling and romantic that all hearers must be impressed by his heroism. Sir Charles had attempted to mediate in disputes between Gilbert and the Stanhopes. When he was out riding one morning with two of his wife’s relatives, Henry and Launcelot Ogle (the latter a boy acting as Charles’s page), attended only by one groom, Stanhope attacked him with twenty horsemen. Sir Charles’s horse stumbled, and while he was down, they shot at him, but despite wounds all over his body he and his companions used rapiers and daggers to fight back, killing two, unhorsing six, and severely wounding another two. One of the finest swordsmen of his day, Sir Charles gleefully recorded the day’s spoils of victory: several good horses, two or three cloaks, some hats, a sword, two rapiers, and a dagger. The Queen censured Stanhope as the aggressor.

Echoes of this story seem to lie behind the figure of Ironside in The Magnetic Lady, as he generates fear among the other men in the house in 2.4, 3.3, 3.5 (particularly the argument about valour and duelling), and 4.2. In the play, his valour and modesty win him the love of Lady Loadstone, parallelling the love that seemed to exist in the senior Cavendish marriage. Charles’s will left his wife all his personal estate, plus a life-interest in all the family chattels, with outright ownership of the plate in her cupboard and her bed: ‘And he did appoint the said Lady Katherine Cavendish executrix of the said will’ (Collins, 1752, 22). The monument at Bolsover records the ‘Sad and Weeping Remembrance of his Sorrowful Lady Katherine’, who devised the memorial with her sons (Collins, 1752, 23; and Parry, 1994a), and Jonson’s later epitaph for her records the bright side of her death: her reunion with ‘her lovèd lord’ (39). The couple generally lived at Welbeck, busying themselves with estate management, building renovations, and encouraging their sons’ intellectual and social skills. Even the audience’s perception of offstage space in The Magnetic Lady seems to compliment the Cavendish zeal for renovation and Vitruvian architectural principles of proportion and balance, followed in the rebuilding of Bolsover Castle. In the play, we enter Lady Loadstone’s house near the Old Exchange from the street in Act 1, and from Act 2 on, we become aware of spaces adjacent to the main reception room: the dining-room, so vital to the Act 3 crisis at the table, for which Jonson supplies a clear seating-plan; two bed-chambers, Placentia’s, to which she is carried when she collapses, and Lady Loadstone’s (3.3); Compass’s chamber in which he and Pleasance are married, with Ironside as witness (4.6); Sir Moth’s chamber, where he conducts business; hallways through which servants pass (4.1) or argue (4.4); the buttery, where Polish hides the bride (5.2), and the garden where Sir Moth falls down the well (5.10). The other concept of space comes from the Chorus, clearly located in the theatre at Blackfriars, where two stage-sitters discuss the scenes with Trygust, the poet’s representative in the company. Their discussion of theatre as a stimulus for a thinking audience brings us back to Jonson’s tribute to the Cavendish family, where intellectual growth stemmed from family affection and physical energy.

Aside from training his sons in estate management and renovation, Sir Charles Cavendish trained both William and Charles in horsemanship and swordsmanship. William inherited his father’s athletic ability, spending more time on sports than on books at university, and because his father recognized that intelligence and charm would take him far, he encouraged his son to perfect his skills with horses and weapons. William’s intellectual and creative life as playwright and patron of arts and sciences emerged later, partly out of the continuing affectionate contact with his brother. The younger son Charles ‘was inclined, from his youth to learning, and became a great proficient in the study of the mathematics, wherein he was singularly well versed’ (Collins, 1752, 24), corresponding with such men as Oughtred, Hobbes, Descartes, Fermat, and other notable scholars in Europe. His modern biographer particularly praises Charles as a sound interpreter of ‘his own physical experiments’, and an ‘appreciative’ patron of scientists, ‘by asking intelligent questions or formulating valuable objections, and by helping the circulation and exchange of scientific information’ (Jacquot, 1952, 13).

On this basis, Charles seems a likely model for the Oxford scholar mathematic, Compass. Although Charles was not robustly healthy like his brother, he was, by contemporary standards, ‘a man of the noblest and largest mind, though the least and most inconvenient body that lived’ (Collins, 1752, 24), and like his brother performed well in military service. His sister-in-law Margaret (Lucas) Cavendish later eulogized him as ‘a person of so great worth, such extraordinary civility, so obliging a nature, so full of generosity, justice, and charity, besides all manner of learning, especially in the mathematics, that not only his friends, but even his enemies, did much lament his loss’ (Memoirs of William Cavendish, 1880, 25). The ‘brotherly’ relationship between Ironside and Compass seems to replicate the brotherly warmth between the Cavendishes, who had, besides their boyhood at Welbeck and military training, shared the experience of touring Europe with Sir Henry Wotton in 1610–12. Wotton, an old friend of Jonson’s, would be another source of information about the brothers and their escapades, especially since Jonson too had had the experience of shepherding a teenager (Ralegh’s son) through France in 1613.

Even more significantly, the philosophy expressed in Jonson’s play echoes the Cavendish interest in Hobbes, a frequent visitor at Welbeck since at least 1630, who discussed with them his ideas on the principles of natural science, ‘and sought to explain sensation, imagination, and thought in terms of motion’ (Jacquot, 1952, 17) – a concept that lies behind Compass’s argument in 3.3, especially 116–23, as he expounds the difference between imagining an act and performing it. Similarly, the play expresses an interest in optics and the physiology of perception as the underlying factor of psychology: witness the difficulty characters have in seeing Placentia’s condition and accepting what it is; how Polish’s plot depends upon that very ‘double-think’ of perception in the baby-switch, and in Jonson’s whole fascination with good and bad audiences as represented onstage – an interest, to be sure, that precedes Hobbes (see Every Man Out of His Humour, Induction and Grex), but one that became richer and more problematic over time.

Indeed, Jonson makes it clear from the Induction that he is deliberately recollecting Every Man Out of His Humour as he completes the circle of his career: the play-within-a-play format, the onstage audience’s discussions which draw attention to the play’s structure and purpose, and the offstage and backstage tension between theatre-workers and audience are all features of Jonson’s earlier work. Other echoes of Jonson’s earlier works, beginning with Every Man Out of His Humour and continuing throughout his writing for the stage, include the choice of representative types (the lawyer, the courtier who cares most for his clothes, the parasite, the grasping merchant), the specific urban location or resort, and the commedia dell’arte farce routines. The focus on performance also tests the audience’s knowledge of the classical stage and of contemporary practice in specific theatres, often pointedly teasing the audience with pornographic stagings, like the libidinous focus on Placentia’s pregnancy, hotly complained of by Damplay, who reminds us indirectly of other staged pregnancies that focus on their sexual origins (The Duchess of Malfi, The Winter’s Tale, All’s Well That Ends Well, Measure for Measure, and The Birth of Merlin, to name a few). Other Jonsonian preferences appear in the staging of groups, often marked by lightly veiled hostility, watching one another critically, muttering asides within groups, and attacking across groups, moving towards a full stage which audiences can assess by recognizing degrees of competence or wit. Part of that process of recognition depends on the audience’s literacy, in learned as well as popular writings, and on observations of contemporary life and current affairs.

Through such complex tactics, Jonson reminds us that theatre jogs our understandings, toying with our fantasies; the onstage audience is important in helping us, the offstage audience, separate our emotional or physical responses from our intellectual judgements. The point is not to agree with the onstage audience, but to try to resolve the questions they ask or the objections they raise. As Rowe (1984) has argued of The New Inn and The Sad Shepherd, and Fitzmaurice (1998) of the Cavendish entertainments, Jonson’s celebration of the Cavendishes in The Magnetic Lady offers the kind of teasing praise that is a keynote of Jonsonian theatre, addressing a particular, intelligent audience, who will be judiciously appreciative of his work. If Jonson expresses, more clearly than other playwrights, his own anxieties at the public reception of his art, that clarity is a feature of Jonson’s self-conscious metatheatricality in urging the value of that art. Surely that desire motivates all playwrights who hope they will stimulate the mind and tickle the senses in pleasures communally shared in the theatre and individually savoured later in recollection.

 

 The Persons that Act

LADY  LOADSTONE
  the   magnetic lady
MISTRESS  POLISH
  her   gossip and   she-parasite
 PLACENTIA  [STEEL]
   her presumed niece
 PLEASANCE
  her waiting-woman [and presumed daughter of Polish]
MISTRESS  KEEP
  the niece’s nurse 5
 MOTHER  CHAIR
  the midwife
MASTER  COMPASS
  a scholar   mathematic
CAPTAIN  IRONSIDE
  a soldier
PARSON  PALATE
  prelate of the parish
DOCTOR  RUT
    physician to the house 10
 TIM ITEM
  his apothecary
SIR   DIAPHANOUS  SILKWORM
  a courtier
MASTER  PRACTICE
    a lawyer
SIR   MOTH  INTEREST
  an usurer, or money- bawd [brother to Lady Loadstone]
MASTER  BIAS
    a vi-politic, or sub-secretary 15
MASTER NEEDLE
  the   lady’s steward and tailor
[A  FOOTBOY]
 
[A VARLET]
CHORUS

by way of Induction

[MASTER PROBEE]
   
[MASTER DAMPLAY]
   20
[JOHN  TRYGUST
   boy of the house]

 THE SCENE: LONDON

 The Induction, or Chorus

Two gentlemen entering upon the stage, Master PROBEE and Master DAMPLAY, a BOY of the house meets them.

BOY

What do you lack, gentlemen?  What is’t you lack? Any fine   fancies, figures,

humours, characters, ideas, definitions of  lords and ladies? Waiting-women,

parasites, knights, captains, courtiers, lawyers? What do you lack?

PROBEE

A pretty  prompt boy for the  poetic shop.

DAMPLAY

 And a bold! Where’s one o’your masters, sirrah, the poet? 5

BOY

Which of ’em? Sir, we have divers that drive that trade now: poets,

 poetaccios, poetasters, poetitos –

DAMPLAY

And all  haberdashers of small wit, I presume. We would speak with

the  poet o’the day, boy.

BOY

Sir,  he is not here. But I have the  dominion of the shop for this time under 10

him, and can show you all the variety the stage will afford for the present.

PROBEE

 Therein you will express your own good parts, boy.

DAMPLAY

And  tie us two to you for the gentle office.

PROBEE

We are a pair of  public persons, this gentleman and myself, that are sent

thus coupled unto you upon state business. 15

BOY

It concerns  but the state of the stage, I hope!

DAMPLAY

Oh, you shall know that by degrees, boy. No man leaps into a business

of state without fording first the state of the business.

PROBEE

We are sent unto you, indeed, from the people.

BOY

The people! Which side of the people? 20

DAMPLAY

The  venison side, if you know it, boy.

BOY

That’s the  left side. I had rather they had been the right.

PROBEE

 So they are. Not the   faeces or grounds of your people, that sit in the

oblique  caves and wedges of your house, your sinful  six-penny  mechanics –

DAMPLAY

But the better and  braver sort of your people!  Plush-and-velvet 25

outsides that  stick to your house round like so many eminences –

BOY

Of clothes, not understandings? They are at  pawn. Well, I take  these as a

part of your people, though. What bring you to me from these people?

DAMPLAY

You have heard, boy, the ancient poets had it in their purpose still

to please this people? 30

PROBEE

Ay, their chief aim was —

DAMPLAY

 Populo ut placerent (if he understands so much).

BOY

Quas fecissent fabulas. I understand that sin’ I learned Terence i’the  third

form at  Westminster. Go on, sir.

PROBEE

Now, these people have employed us to you in all their names to entreat 35

an excellent play from you.

DAMPLAY

For they have had very  mean ones from this shop of late, the stage,

as you call it.

BOY

Troth, gentlemen, I have no wares which I dare thrust upon the people with

praise. But this, such as it is, I will  venture with your people, your gay 40

gallant people, so as you again will undertake for them that they shall know

a good play when they hear it, and will have the conscience and  ingenuity

beside to confess it.

PROBEE

We’ll  pass our words for that. You shall have a  brace of us to

engage ourselves. 45

BOY

You’ll  tender your names, gentlemen, to our book then?

DAMPLAY

Yes, here’s Master Probee, a man of most powerful speech and  parts

to persuade.

PROBEE

And Master Damplay will make good all he undertakes.

BOY

Good Master Probee and Master Damplay! I like your  securities.  Whence 50

do you write yourselves?

PROBEE

Of London; gentlemen, but knights’  brothers and knights’ friends, I

assure you.

DAMPLAY

And knights’  fellows too. Every poet writes  squire now.

BOY

You are  good names! Very good men, both of you! I accept you. 55

DAMPLAY

And what is the title of your play here? The Magnetic Lady?

BOY

Yes, sir, an  attractive title the author has given it.

PROBEE

 A magnete, I warrant you.

DAMPLAY

Oh, no, from  magnus, magna,  magnum!

BOY

 This gentleman hath found the true magnitude — 60

DAMPLAY

Of his  portal or entry to the work, according to  Vitruvius.

BOY

Sir, all our work is done without a portal — or Vitruvius.  In   foro, as a true

comedy should be. And what is concealed within is brought out and  made

present by report.

DAMPLAY

We see not that always observed by your authors of these times, or 65

scarce any other.

BOY

Where it is not at all known, how should it be observed? The most of those

 your people call authors never dreamed of any  decorum or what was proper in

the scene, but grope at it i’the dark and feel or fumble for it. I speak it both

with their  leave and the leave o’your people. 70

DAMPLAY

But why Humours  Reconciled, I would fain know?

BOY

I can satisfy you there  too — if you will. But perhaps you desire not to be

satisfied.

DAMPLAY

No? Why should you conceive so, boy?

BOY

My conceit is not ripe yet; I’ll tell you that anon. The author, beginning 75

his studies of this kind with Every Man In His Humour and after, Every Man

Out of His Humour, and since, continuing in all his plays, especially those of

the comic thread whereof The New Inn was the last, some recent humours

still, or manners of men, that went along with the times, finding himself

now near the  close or shutting up of his circle, hath  fancied to himself in 80

idea this magnetic mistress. A lady, a brave,  bountiful housekeeper and a

virtuous widow, who, having a young niece ripe for a man and marriageable,

he makes that his centre attractive to draw thither a diversity of guests, all

persons of different humours to make up his perimeter. And this he hath

called Humours Reconciled. 85

PROBEE

A bold undertaking! And far greater than the  reconciliation of both

churches, the quarrel between humours having been much the ancienter

and, in my poor opinion, the root of all schism and faction, both in church

and commonwealth.

BOY

Such is the opinion of many wise men that meet at this shop still, but how 90

he will  speed in it we cannot tell, and he himself (it seems) less cares. For

he will not be entreated by us to give it a prologue. He has  lost too much

that way already, he says. He will not woo the   gentle ignorance so much. But

careless of all  vulgar censure, as not depending on common approbation, he is

confident it shall  super-please  judicious spectators, and to them he leaves 95

it to work with the rest by example or otherwise.

DAMPLAY

He may be deceived in that, boy. Few follow examples now, especially

if they be good.

BOY

The play is ready to begin, gentlemen: I tell you, lest you might defraud

the expectation of the people for whom you are delegates! Please you take a 100

couple of seats and plant yourselves here as near  my standing as you can.  Fly

everything you see to the mark, and  censure  it freely –  so you interrupt not

the  series or thread of the argument, to break or  pucker it with unnecessary

questions. For I must tell you (not out of mine own  dictamen, but the

 author’s), a good play is like a  skein of silk which, if you take by the  right 105

end, you may wind off at pleasure on the  bottom or  card of your discourse in

a tale or so, how you will. But if you light on the wrong end, you will pull all

into a knot or  elf-lock, which nothing but the  shears or a candle will undo

or separate.

DAMPLAY

Stay! Who be these, I pray you? 110

BOY

Because it is your first question, and  these be the  prime persons, it would

in civility require an anwer. But I have heard the poet affirm that to be the

most unlucky scene in a play which needs an  interpreter, especially when the

auditory are awake, and such are you, he presumes.  Ergo.

[Probee and Damplay take their seats.]

THE MAGNETIC LADY, / OR HUMOURS RECONCILED

1.1

  [Enter] COMPASS [and] IRONSIDE.

COMPASS

 Welcome, good Captain Ironside, and  brother,

You shall along with me. I’m lodged  hard by,

Here at a noble lady’s house i’th’street,

The Lady Loadstone’s ( one will bid us welcome)

Where there are gentlewomen and male guests 5

Of several humours,  carriage,  constitution,

Profession too, but so  diametral

One to another and so much opposed

As, if I can but hold them all together

And draw ’em to a  sufferance of themselves 10

But till the  dissolution of the dinner,

I shall have just occasion to believe

My wit is  magisterial, and ourselves

Take infinite delight i’the  success.

IRONSIDE

Troth, brother Compass, you shall pardon me. 15

I love not so to  multiply acquaintance

 At a meal’s cost. ’Twill  take off o’my freedom

So much, or  bind me to the least observance.

COMPASS

Why, Ironside, you know I am a scholar

And part a soldier; I have been employed 20

By  some the greatest statesmen o’the kingdom

These many years, and in my time conversed

With sundry humours, suiting so myself

To company,  as honest men and knaves,

  Goodfellows, hypocrites, all sorts of people, 25

Though never so divided in themselves,

 Have studied to agree still in the usage

And handling of me (which hath been fair too).

IRONSIDE

Sir, I confess you to be one well read

In  men and manners, and that usually 30

The most  ungoverned persons, you being present,

Rather subject themselves unto your  censure

Than give you least occasion of  distaste

By making you the  subject of their mirth.

But – to deal plainly with you, as a brother – 35

Whenever I  distrust i’my own valour,

I’ll never  bear me on another’s wit,

Or offer to  bring off or save myself

On the opinion of your judgement, gravity,

Discretion, or what else. But,  being away, 40

  You’re sure to have  less wit-work, gentle brother,

My humour being as stubborn as the rest,

And as unmanageable.

COMPASS

You do mistake

My  caract of your friendship all this while,

Or at what rate I  reckon your assistance, 45

 Knowing by long experience, to such animals,

Half-hearted creatures as these are, your  fox, there,

 Unkennelled with a  choleric  ghastly aspect,

Or two or three  comminatory terms,

Would run their fears to any hole of shelter, 50

Worth a day’s laughter. I am for the sport,

For nothing else.

IRONSIDE

But brother, I ha’ seen

A coward, meeting with a man as valiant

As our  Saint George (not knowing him to be such,

Or having least opinion that he was so), 55

 Set to him roundly, ay, and  swinge him soundly;

And i’the  virtue of that error, having

Once overcome, resolved forever after

To err, and think no person nor no creature

More valiant than himself.

COMPASS

I think that too. 60

But, brother, could I   over-entreat you,

I have some little  plot upon  the rest:

 If you would be contented to endure

A  sliding  reprehension at my hands,

To hear yourself or your profession  glanced at 65

In a few slighting  terms, it would beget

Me such a  main authority  o’the by

And do yourself no disrepute at all.

IRONSIDE

Compass, I know that  universal causes

In nature produce nothing but as meeting 70

Particular causes, to determine those

And specify their acts. This is a piece

Of  Oxford science  stays with me e’er since

I left that place, and I have often found

The truth thereof in my private  passions. 75

For I do never feel myself perturbed

With any general words ’gainst my  profession,

Unless by some smart stroke upon myself

They do awake and stir me.  Else, to wise

And well-experienced men, words  do but signify; 80

They have no power, save with dull grammarians,

Whose souls are naught but a  syntaxis of them.

COMPASS

Here comes our parson, Parson Palate here,

A  venerable youth! I must  salute him –

And a great  clerk! He’s going to the  lady’s, 85

And, though you see him thus without his  cope,

I dare assure you, he’s our parish pope.

 [Enter] PALATE.

God save my reverend  clergy, Parson Palate!

 1.2

PALATE

 The witty Master Compass! How is’t with you?

COMPASS

My lady  stays for you and for your counsel

Touching her niece, Mistress Placentia  Steel,

Who  strikes the fire of full fourteen today,

 Ripe for a husband.

palate

Ay, she   chimes, she chimes. 5

Saw you the Doctor Rut, the house physician?

He’s sent for too.

COMPASS

To counsel?  ’Time yo’ were there.

Make haste and give it a  round,  quick dispatch,

That we may go to dinner  betimes, parson,

And drink a  health or two more to the business. 10 [Exit Palate.]

IRONSIDE

This is a strange  put-off! A reverend  youth,

You use him most  surreverently, methinks.

 What call you him? Palate Please? Or Parson Palate?

COMPASS

All’s one, but shorter. I can gi’ you his  character.

He is the  prelate of the parish here 15

And  governs all the dames,  appoints the cheer,

Writes down the bills of fare,  pricks all the guests,

 Makes all the matches and the marriage feasts

Within the ward,  draws all the parish wills,

Designs the legacies, and  strokes the gills 20

Of the chief mourners; and,   whoever lacks

Of all the kindred, he hath first his blacks.

Thus  holds he weddings up, and burials,

As his main  tithing, with the  gossips’ stalls,

Their pews. He’s  top still at the public mess, 25

 Comforts the widow and the fatherless

In funeral  sack, sits  ’bove the alderman,

 For of the  wardmote quest he better  can

The  mystery than the Levitic law.

 That piece of  clerkship doth his vestry awe. 30

He is as he conceives himself, a fine,

 Well furnished and apparellèd divine.

IRONSIDE

Who made this  epigram? You?

COMPASS

No, a great  clerk

As  any’s of his  bulk: Ben Jonson made it.

IRONSIDE

But what’s the other character, Doctor Rut? 35

COMPASS

The same  man made  ’em both, but his is shorter,

And not in rhyme, but  blanks. I’ll tell you that too.

Rut is a young physician to the family,

That,  letting God alone, ascribes to nature

More than her share;  licentious in discourse, 40

And in his life a  professed  voluptuary;

The  slave of money, a   buffoon in manners;

 Obscene in language, which he  vents for wit;

Is  saucy in his logics and disputing,

Is anything but civil or a man. 45

See, here they are!

 [Enter] LADY [LOADSTONE], PALATE, [and] RUT.

And walking with my lady

In consultation  afore the door.

We will slip in as if we saw ’em not.  [Exeunt Compass and Ironside.]

 1.3

LADY

 Ay,  ’tis his fault  she’s not  bestowed,

My brother Interest’s.

PALATE

Who, old Sir Moth?

LADY

 He keeps off all her suitors, keeps the  portion

Still in his hands, and will not part   withal

On any terms.

PALATE

 Hinc illae  lachrimae: 5

Thus flows the cause o’the main grievance.

RUT

 That

It is a main one. How much is the portion?

LADY

No petty sum.

PALATE

 But sixteen thousand pound.

RUT

He should be forced, madam, to  lay it down.

When is it payable?

LADY

When she is married. 10

PALATE

Marry her, marry her, madam.

RUT

Get her married.

Lose not a day, an hour –

PALATE

Not a minute.

Pursue your project  real. Master Compass

Advised you too. He is the perfect  instrument

Your Ladyship should sail by.

RUT

Now, Master Compass 15

Is a fine witty man. I saw him go in now.

LADY

Is he gone in?

PALATE

Yes, and a  feather with  him.

He seems a soldier.

RUT

Some new suitor, madam.

LADY

I am beholden to him: he brings ever

Variety of good persons to my table, 20

And I must thank him, though my brother Interest

 Dislike of it a little.

PALATE

 He likes nothing

That runs your way.

RUT

Troth, and  the other cares not.

He’ll go his own way, if he think it right.

LADY

He’s a true friend. And  there’s Master Practice, 25

The fine young man of law  comes to the house.

My brother  brooks him not, because he thinks

He is by me  assignèd for my niece.

He will not hear of it.

RUT

 Not of that ear.

But yet Your Ladyship doth wisely in it – 30

PALATE

’Twill make him to lay down the portion sooner,

If he but dream you’ll match her with a lawyer.

LADY

So Master Compass says. It is between

The lawyer and the courtier which shall have her.

PALATE

Who, Sir Diaphanous Silkworm?

RUT

 A fine gentleman. 35

Old Master Silkworm’s heir.

PALATE

And a  neat courtier,

Of a most elegant   thread.

LADY

And so my gossip

Polish assures me. Here she comes!

[Enter POLISH.]

Good Polish,

Welcome, in troth! How dost thou, gentle Polish?

RUT

[Aside to Palate] Who’s this?

PALATE

[Aside to Rut] Dame Polish, her she-parasite, 40

Her  talking,  soothing,  sometime governing gossip.

 1.4

POLISH

  Your Ladyship is still the Lady Loadstone

That draws and draws unto you guests of all sorts:

The courtiers, and the soldiers, and the scholars,

The travellers, physicians, and divines,

As Doctor  Ridley writ, and Doctor  Barlow! 5

They both have wrote of you and Master Compass.

LADY

We  mean they shall write more, ere it be long.

POLISH

Alas, they are  both dead, an’t please you. But

Your Ladyship means well, and shall mean well,

So long as I live. How does your fine niece, 10

My  charge, Mistress Placentia Steel?

LADY

She is not well.

POLISH

Not well?

LADY

Her doctor says so.

RUT

Not very well. She cannot  shoot at  butts,

Or manage a great horse, but she can   crunch

A sack of   small coal,  eat you  lime and hair, 15

 Soap-ashes, loam, and has a  dainty  spice

O’the  green sickness.

POLISH

 ’Od shield!

RUT

Or the  dropsy.

A  toy, a thing of nothing. But My Lady here,

Her noble aunt –

POLISH

She is a noble aunt,

And a  right worshipful lady, and a virtuous, 20

I know it well.

RUT

Well, if you know it,  peace.

PALATE

Good  sister Polish, hear your betters speak.

POLISH

Sir, I will speak, with My good Lady’s leave,

And speak and speak again. I did bring up

My Lady’s niece, Mistress Placentia Steel, 25

With my own daughter,  who’s Placentia too,

And waits upon My Lady as her woman.

Her Ladyship well knows Mistress Placentia

Steel, as I said, her  curious niece, was  left

A legacy to me by father and mother, 30

With the nurse, Keep, that tended her. Her mother,

She died  in childbed of her, and her father

Lived not long after, for he loved her mother.

They were a godly couple! Yet both died,

As must we all. No creature is  immortal, 35

I have heard our pastor  say, no,  not the faithful,

And they did die, as I said, both in one month –

RUT

[Aside to Palate]Sure  she is not long lived, if she  spend breath thus.

POLISH

And did bequeath her to my care and hand

To  polish and bring up. I moulded her 40

And fashioned her and formed her; she had the sweat

Both of my brows and  brains, My Lady knows it,

Since she  could write  a quarter old.

LADY

I know not

That she could write so early, my good gossip.

But I do know she was so long your care, 45

 Till she was twelve year old, that I called for her

And took her home, for which I thank you, Polish,

And am beholden to you.

RUT

[Aside to Palate] I sure thought

 She had a lease of talking for nine lives –

PALATE

[Aside to Rut] It may be she has.

POLISH

 Sir, sixteen thousand pound 50

Was then her portion, for she was indeed

Their only child. And this was to be paid

Upon her marriage,  so she married  still

With My good Lady’s liking here, her aunt.

I heard the will read: Master Steel, her father, 55

The world  condemned him to be very rich

And  very hard, and he did stand condemned

With that vain world till, as ’twas  proved after,

 He left almost as much more to good uses

In Sir Moth Interest’s hands, My Lady’s brother, 60

Whose sister  he had married. He holds all

In his close  grip. But Master Steel was  liberal,

And a fine man, and she a  dainty dame,

And a religious, and a bountiful –

 1.5  To them, [enter] COMPASS [and] IRONSIDE.

  POLISH

 You knew  her, Master Compass?

COMPASS

Spare the  torture.

I do confess without it.

POLISH

And her  husband?

What a fine couple they were, and how they lived?

COMPASS

Yes.

POLISH

And loved together like a pair of  turtles?

COMPASS

Yes.

POLISH

And feasted all the neighbours?

COMPASS

 Take her off, 5

Somebody that hath mercy –

RUT

[Aside to Palate]Oh, he knows her,

It seems!

COMPASS

– or any measure of compassion.

 Doctors, if you be Christians, undertake

One for the soul, the other for the body!

POLISH

 She would  dispute with the doctors of divinity 10

At her own table! And the  Spital preachers!

And find out the  Armenians.

RUT

The   Arminians?

POLISH

I say the Armenians.

COMPASS

Nay, I say so too!

POLISH

So Master Polish called ’em, the Armenians!

COMPASS

And  Medes and Persians, did he not?

POLISH

Yes, he knew ’em, 15

And so did Mistress Steel! She was his pupil.

The Armenians, he would say, were worse than papists!

And then the Persians were our puritans,

Had the fine piercing wits!

COMPASS

And who the Medes?

POLISH

The middlemen, the  lukewarm  protestants! 20

RUT

 Out, out!

POLISH

Sir, she would find them by their  branching:

Their branching sleeves, branched cassocks, and branched doctrine,

 Beside their texts.

RUT

 Stint,  carline: I’ll not  hear.

Confute  her, parson.

POLISH

I respect no  persons,

Chaplains, or doctors. I will speak.

LADY

Yes. So’t be reason, 25

Let her.

RUT

 Death, she cannot speak reason.

COMPASS

Nor sense, if we be masters of our senses.

IRONSIDE

What madwoman ha’ they got here to  bait?

POLISH

Sir, I am mad in truth and to the purpose,

And cannot but be mad, to hear My Lady’s 30

Dead sister slighted, witty Mistress Steel!

IRONSIDE

 If she had a wit, death has gone near to spoil it,

Assure yourself.

POLISH

She was both witty and  zealous,

And  lighted all the tinder o’the truth

(As one said) of religion in our parish. 35

She was too   learnèd to live long with us!

She  could the Bible in the  holy tongue,

And read it without  pricks; had all her  Masoreth;

Knew  Burton and his Bull, and  scribe  Prynne, gent.,

 Presto-begone, and all the  Pharisees!

LADY

Dear gossip, 40

Be you gone at this time too, and  vouchsafe

To see your charge, my niece.

POLISH

I shall obey,

If Your wise Ladyship think fit. I know

To yield to my superiors.  [Exit.]

LADY

A good woman!

But when  she is impertinent, grows  earnest, 45

A little troublesome and out of season,

Her love and zeal transport her.

COMPASS

I am glad

That anything could  port her hence. We now

Have hope of dinner, after her  long grace.

I have brought Your Ladyship a hungry guest here, 50

A soldier and my brother, Captain Ironside,

Who being by custom grown a  sanguinary,

The solemn and adopted son of slaughter,

Is more delighted i’the chase of an enemy,

 An execution of three days and nights, 55

Than all the hope of numerous  succession

Or happiness of issue could bring to him –

RUT

[Aside to Palate] He is no suitor, then?

PALATE

[Aside to Rut] So’t should seem.

COMPASS

And, if he can get pardon at heaven’s hand

For all his murders, is  in as good case 60

As a new-christened infant,   his employments

Continued to him without interruption,

And not allowing him or time or place

To commit any other sin but those.

Please you to make him welcome for a meal, madam. 65

LADY

The nobleness of his profession makes

His welcome perfect, though your  coarse description

Would seem to sully it.

IRONSIDE

Never, where a  beam

Of so much favour doth  illustrate it,

Right knowing lady.

PALATE

[Aside to Rut] She hath  cured all well. 70

RUT

[Aside to Palate] And he hath fitted well the   compliment.

 1.6 To them [enter] SIR DIAPHANOUS [and] PRACTICE.

COMPASS

 No, here they come! The  prime  magnetic guests

Our Lady Loadstone so respects: the   Arctic

And th’Antarctic! Sir Diaphanous  Silkworm,

A courtier extraordinary who, by diet

Of meats and drinks, his temperate exercise, 5

Choice music, frequent baths, his  horary  shifts

Of shirts and waistcoats, means to immortalize

Mortality itself, and makes the essence

Of his whole happiness the  trim of court!

DIAPHANOUS

I thank you, Master Compass, for your short 10

 Encomiastic.

RUT

It is  much in little, sir.

PALATE

Concise and  quick: the true style of an orator.

COMPASS

But Master Practice here, My Lady’s lawyer,

Or man of law (for that’s the true writing):

A man so dedicate to his profession 15

And the  preferments go along with it,

As scarce the  thund’ring  bruit of an invasion,

Another  eighty-eight  threat’ning his country

With ruin, would no more work upon him

Than  Syracusa’s sack on Archimede, 20

So much he loves that  nightcap, the  bench-gown

With the broad  guard  o’th’back. These  show a man

Betrothed unto the study of our laws!

PRACTICE

Which you but think the crafty impositions

Of subtle clerks, feats of fine understanding 25

To abuse  clots and clowns with, Master Compass,

Having no  ground in nature to sustain it

Or light from those clear causes, to the inquiry

And search of which your mathematical head

Hath so  devowed itself.

COMPASS

Tut, all men are 30

Philosophers  to their inches. There’s  within

Sir Interest, as able a philosopher

In buying and  selling,  has reduced his thrift

To certain principles, and i’that  method,

As he will tell you instantly, by  logarithms, 35

The utmost profit of a  stock employed,

Be the  commodity what it will, the place

Or time but causing very, very little,

Or, I may say, no  parallax at all,

In his pecuniary observations! 40

He has brought your niece’s portion with him, madam;

At least the man that must receive it. Here

They come, negotiating the affair;

You may perceive the contract in their faces

And read th’ indenture.  If you’d sign ’em, so. 45

 1.7 To them [enter] INTEREST [and] BIAS.

PALATE

[Not heard by Bias]  What is  he, Master Compass?

COMPASS

A   vi-politic,

Or a  sub-aiding instrument of  state:

A kind of  laborious secretary

To a great  man – and likely to  come  on!

Full of   attendance, and  of such a stride 5

In business, politic or economic,

As well his lord may stoop  t’advise with him

And be  prescribed by him in affairs

Of highest consequence, when  he is dulled

Or wearied with the  less!

DIAPHANOUS

’Tis Master Bias, 10

Lord Whach’um’s politic.

COMPASS

You know the man?

DIAPHANOUS

I ha’ seen him wait at court there with his  maniples

Of papers and petitions.

PRACTICE

He is one

That  overrules  though by his authority

Of living there and cares for no man else; 15

Neglects the sacred letter of the law,

And holds it all to be but a dead heap

Of civil institutions, the  rest only

Of common men and their causes, a  farrago,

Or a  made-dish in court, a thing of nothing. 20

COMPASS

And that’s your quarrel at him? A just plea.

INTEREST

[To Lady Loadstone] I tell you, sister Loadstone –

COMPASS

[Aside to Ironside]   Hang your ears

This way and hear his praises: now Moth  opens.

INTEREST

I ha’ brought you here the very man, the jewel

Of all the court,  close Master Bias.  Sister, 25

Apply him to your side, or you may wear him

Here o’your breast, or hang him in your ear.

He’s a fit pendant for a lady’s  tip:

A  chrysolite, a gem, the very  agate

Of state and polity, cut from the  quar 30

Of  Machiavel, a true  cornelian

As  Tacitus himself, and to be made

The  brooch to any true state-cap in Europe!

LADY

You praise him, brother,  as you had hope to sell him.

COMPASS

No, madam, as he had hope to sell your niece 35

Unto him.

LADY

’Ware your  true jests, Master Compass;

They will not  relish.

INTEREST

I will tell you, sister,

I cannot cry his  caract up enough:

He is  unvaluable. All the lords

Have him in that esteem for his  relations, 40

 Courants,  avises,  correspondences

With this ambassador and that agent. He

Will  screw you out a secret from a  statist –

COMPASS

So easy as some  cobbler  worms a dog.

INTEREST

And lock it in the  cabinet of his memory – 45

COMPASS

 Till’t turn a politic insect or a fly

Thus long.

INTEREST

You may be merry, Master Compass,

But though you have the  reversion of an office,

You are not in’t, sir.

BIAS

Remember that.

COMPASS

Why, should that fright me, Master  Bi-, from telling 50

Whose  -as you are?

INTEREST

Sir, he’s one can do

His  turns there and deliver too his letters

As punctually and in as good a fashion

As e’er a secretary can in court.

IRONSIDE

Why, is it any matter in what fashion 55

A man deliver his letters,  so he not open ’em?

BIAS

Yes, we have certain precedents in court

From which we never swerve once in an age,

And – whatsoe’er he thinks – I know the arts

And sciences do not directlier make 60

A graduate in our universities

Than an  habitual gravity  prefers

A man in court.

COMPASS

Which, by the truer style,

Some call a  formal, flat servility.

BIAS

Sir, you may call it what you please. But we 65

That tread the path of public businesses

Know what a tacit shrug is, or a  shrink,

The wearing the  calotte, the  politic hood,

And twenty other  parerga,  o’the by,

You  seculars understand not. [Aside] I shall  trick him, 70

If his reversion  come i’my lord’s way.

DIAPHANOUS

What is that, Master Practice? You sure know

Mas’ Compass’s reversion?

PRACTICE

A fine place:

 Surveyor of the projects general.

I would I had it.

PALATE

What is’t worth?

PRACTICE

Oh, sir, 75

A  nemo scit.

LADY

[To Interest] We’ll  think on’t afore dinner. [Exeunt.]

 CHORUS 1

BOY

Now, gentlemen, what  censure you of our  protasis, or first act?

PROBEE

Well, boy, it is a fair  presentment of your actors. And a handsome

promise of somewhat to come hereafter.

DAMPLAY

But there is nothing done in it, or concluded. Therefore I say, no

 act. 5

BOY

A fine piece of logic! Do you look, Master Damplay, for conclusions in a

 protasis? I thought the law of comedy had reserved  ’em to the  catastrophe, and

that the  epitasis, as we are taught, and the  catastasis had been intervening parts,

to have been expected. But you would have all come together, it seems. The

clock should strike five at once with the acts. 10

DAMPLAY

Why, if it could do so, it were well, boy.

BOY

Yes, if the nature of a clock were to speak, not strike. So, if a  child could

be born in a play, and grow up to a man i’the first scene, before he went

off the stage, and then after to come forth a squire and be made a knight,

and that knight to travel between the acts and do wonders i’the holy  land, 15

or elsewhere: kill  paynims, wild  boars, dun cows, and other monsters; beget

him a reputation and marry an emperor’s  daughter for his  mistress; convert

her father’s country; and at last come home,  lame and  all-to-beladen with

miracles.

DAMPLAY

These miracles would please, I assure you, and  take the people. For 20

there be of the people that will expect miracles and more than miracles from

 this pen.

BOY

Do they think this pen can  juggle? I would we had  Hocus-pocus for ’em,

 then, your people, or  Travitanto  Tudesko.

DAMPLAY

Who’s that, boy? 25

BOY

Another juggler with a long name. Or that your   expecters would be gone

hence now, at the first act, or  expect no more hereafter than they understand.

DAMPLAY

Why so, my  peremptory  jack?

BOY

My name is John, indeed – Because  who expect what is impossible or beyond

nature defraud themselves. 30

PROBEE

Nay, there the boy said  well: they do defraud themselves indeed.

BOY

And therefore, Master Damplay, unless,  like a solemn justice of wit, you will

damn our play unheard or unexamined, I shall entreat your Mistress,  Madam

Expectation, if she be among these ladies, to have patience but a  pissing while;

give our springs leave to open a little by  degrees! A source of  ridiculous matter 35

may break forth anon that shall steep their temples and bathe their brains

in laughter, to the fomenting of stupidity itself and the awaking any  velvet

 lethargy in the house.

PROBEE

Why do you maintain  your poet’s quarrel so with velvet and good

clothes, boy? We have seen him in  indifferent good clothes ere now. 40

BOY

And may do in better, if it please the  King, his master, to say amen to it, and

allow it, to whom he acknowledgeth all. But  his clothes shall never be the best

thing about him, though; he will have somewhat beside, either of  humane

letters or severe honesty, shall speak him a man though he went naked.

PROBEE

He is beholden to you, if you can make this good, boy. 45

BOY

 Himself hath done that already against envy.

DAMPLAY

What’s your name, sir, or your country?

BOY

John  Trygust, my name. A Cornish youth, and the poet’s  servant.

DAMPLAY

West-country breed, I thought, you were so bold.

BOY

Or rather saucy, to find out your palate, Master Damplay. Faith, we do  call 50

a spade a spade in Cornwall. If you dare damn our play i’the wrong place, we

shall take heart to tell you so.

PROBEE

Good boy!

2.1    [Enter Nurse] KEEP, [Mistress] PLACENTIA, [and] PLEASANCE.

KEEP

Sweet mistress, pray you be merry. You are  sure

To have a husband now.

PLACENTIA

Ay,  if the store

Hurt not the choice.

PLEASANCE

Store is no sore, young mistress,

My mother is wont to say.

KEEP

And she’ll say  wisely

As any mouth i’the parish.  Fix on one, 5

Fix upon one, good mistress.

PLACENTIA

At this  call, too,

Here’s Master Practice who is called to the  bench

 Of purpose.

KEEP

Yes, and  by My Lady’s means –

PLEASANCE

 ’Tis thought to be the man.

KEEP

A lawyer’s  wife –

PLEASANCE

And a fine lawyer’s wife.

KEEP

 is a  brave  calling. 10

PLEASANCE

Sweet Mistress Practice!

KEEP

Gentle Mistress Practice!

PLEASANCE

Fair,  open Mistress Practice!

KEEP

Ay, and  close

And  cunning Mistress Practice!

PLACENTIA

I not like that;

The courtier’s is the  neater calling.

PLEASANCE

Yes,

My Lady Silkworm.

KEEP

And to shine in  plush. 15

PLEASANCE

Like a young  night-crow, a Diaphanous Silkworm.

KEEP

‘Lady Diaphanous’ sounds most  delicate!

PLEASANCE

Which would you choose now, mistress?

PLACENTIA

 Cannot tell.

The  copy does  confound one.

PLEASANCE

Here’s my mother.

2.2   [Enter] POLISH.

POLISH

How now, my  dainty charge and diligent nurse,

What were you  chanting on?

 To her daughter,  kneeling.

 God bless you, maiden.

KEEP

We were  enchanting all, wishing a husband

For my young mistress here. A man to please her.

POLISH

She shall have a man, good nurse, and must have a man: 5

A  man and a half, if we can choose him out.

We are all in council within and  sit about it:

The doctors and the scholars and My Lady,

Who’s wiser than all us – Where’s Master Needle?

Her Ladyship so lacks him to  prick out 10

The man –  [Exit Pleasance.]

How does my sweet young mistress?

You look not well, methinks. How do you, dear charge?

You must have a husband, and you shall have a husband;

There’s two  put out to making for you. A  third

Your uncle promises. But you must still 15

Be ruled by your aunt, according to the will

Of your dead father and mother, who are in heaven.

Your lady aunt has choice i’the house for you.

We do not trust your uncle. He would keep you

A  bachelor still by keeping of your  portion, 20

And keep you  not alone without a husband,

But in a sickness. Ay, and the  green sickness,

The maiden’s malady, which is a sickness,

A kind of a disease, I can assure you,

And like the fish our mariners call  remora – 25

KEEP

A remora, mistress!

POLISH

How now,  goody nurse,

 Dame Keep  of  Kat’er’ne’s? What? Have you an  oar

I’the cockboat, ’cause you are a sailor’s wife

And come from  Shadwell? I say a remora,

For it will stay a ship that’s under sail, 30

 [Enter] NEEDLE [with] PLEASANCE.

And  stays are long and tedious things to maids!

And maidens are young ships that would be sailing

When they be  rigged: wherefore is all their trim else?

NEEDLE

True, and for them to be stayed –

POLISH

The stay is dangerous.

You know it,  Master Needle.

NEEDLE

 I know somewhat, 35

And can assure you, from the doctor’s mouth:

She has a  dropsy, and must  change the air

Before she can recover.

POLISH

Say you so, sir?

NEEDLE

The doctor says so.

POLISH

Says His Worship so?

I warrant ’em he says true then; they sometimes 40

Are  soothsayers and always  cunning-men.

Which doctor was it?

NEEDLE

 E’en My Lady’s doctor,

The  neat house-doctor. But a true stone-doctor.

POLISH

Why, hear you, nurse? How comes this  gear to pass?

This is your fault, in truth. It shall be your fault, 45

And must be your fault. Why is your mistress sick?

She had her health  the while she was with me.

KEEP

Alas, good Mistress Polish,  I am no saint,

Much less My Lady, to be urged give health

Or sickness at my will, but to await 50

The stars’ good pleasure and to do my duty.

POLISH

You must do more than your duty, foolish nurse!

You must do all you can – and more than you can,

More than is possible – when folks are sick,

Especially a mistress, a young mistress. 55

KEEP

Here’s Master Doctor himself  cannot do that.[Exit.]

POLISH

 Doctor Do-all can do it. Thence he’s called so.

2.3   [Enter] RUT [and] LADY [LOADSTONE].

RUT

Whence? What’s he called?

POLISH

 Doctor, do all you can,

I pray you and beseech you, for my charge here.

LADY

She’s my  tend’ring gossip, loves my niece.

POLISH

I know you can do all things, what you please, sir,

For a young  damsel, My good Lady’s niece here. 5

You can do what you  list.

RUT

Peace,  tiffany.

POLISH

 Especially in this new case o’the dropsy.

The gentlewoman, I do fear, is  leavened.

RUT

Leavened? What’s that?

POLISH

 Puffed, blown, an’t please Your Worship.

RUT

What!  Dark by  darker? What is blown? Puffed? Speak 10

English –

POLISH

 Tainted, an’t please you, some do call it.

She swells and swells so with it –

RUT

 Give  her vent,

If she do swell. A  gimlet must be had.

It is a  tympanites she is troubled with.

There are three kinds. The first is  anasarca 15

Under the flesh, a tumour: that’s not  hers.

The second is  ascites, or  aquosus,

A watery humour: that’s not hers neither,

But tympanites,  which we call the  drum.

A wind bomb’s in her belly, must be  unbraced, 20

And with a faucet or a peg let out,

And she’ll do well. Get her  a husband.

POLISH

Yes,

I say so, Master Doctor, and  betimes too.

LADY

As

Soon as we can. Let her bear up today,

Laugh, and keep company at  gleek or  crimp. 25

POLISH

Your Ladyship says  right; crimp, sure, will cure her.

RUT

Yes, and gleek too. Peace, Gossip  Tittle- Tattle.

She must tomorrow down into the country

Some twenty mile.  A coach and six brave horses:

Take the fresh air a month there, or five  weeks, 30

And then  return a bride up to the town

For any husband i’the  hemisphere

To  chuck at, when she has  dropped her   tympany.

POLISH

Must she then drop it?

RUT

Thence ’tis called a dropsy.

The tympanites is one  spice of it: 35

A toy, a thing of nothing, a mere vapour.

I’ll blow’t away.

LADY

Needle, get you the coach

Ready  against tomorrow morning.

NEEDLE

Yes, madam.  [Exit with Pleasance.]

LADY

I’ll  down with her myself and thank the doctor.

POLISH

We all shall thank him. But, dear madam, think, 40

 Resolve upon a man this day.

LADY

I ha’ done’t.

 To tell you true, sweet gossip –  here is none

But Master Doctor; he shall be o’the council –

The man I have  designed her  to, indeed,

Is Master  Practice. He’s a  neat young  man, 45

 Forward, and growing up in a profession,

 Like to be somebody, if the  Hall  stand

And  pleading hold. A  prime young lawyer’s wife

Is a right happy fortune.

RUT

And she bringing

So plentiful a portion, they may live 50

Like king and queen  at common law together:

 Sway judges; guide the courts; command the clerks

And fright the evidence; rule at their pleasures,

Like petty sovereigns in all cases!

POLISH

Oh, that

Will  be a work of time. She may be old 55

Before her husband  rise to a chief judge,

And all  her flower be gone. No, no, a lady

 O’the first head I’d have her, and  in court:

The Lady Silkworm, a diaphanous lady,

And be a  viscountess to  carry all 60

Before her,  as we say; her  gentleman-usher

And  cast-off pages  bare to bid her aunt

 Welcome unto Her Honour at her lodgings.

RUT

You say well, lady’s gossip, if My Lady

Could admit that, to have her niece precede her. 65

LADY

For that, I must  consult mine own ambition,

My  zealous gossip.

POLISH

Oh, you shall precede her:

You shall be a countess. Sir Diaphanous

Shall get you made a countess. Here he comes,

 Has my voice certain –  O fine courtier! 70

O blessèd man! The  bravery  pricked out

To make my dainty charge a viscountess!

And My good Lady, her aunt, countess  at  large!

2.4   

To them [enter] Sir DIAPHANOUS [and] PALATE;
[they talk aside].

DIAPHANOUS

I tell thee, parson, if I get her, reckon

Thou hast a  friend in court and shalt  command

A thousand pound to go on any  errand

For any  church preferment thou hast a mind to.

PALATE

I thank Your Worship. I will so work for you 5

As you shall  study all the ways to thank me.

I’ll  work My Lady and My Lady’s friends:

Her gossip, and this doctor, and Squire Needle,

And Master Compass, who is  all in all –

The very  fly she moves by. He is one 10

That went to sea with her husband, Sir John Loadstone,

And brought home the rich  prizes. All that wealth

Is left her, for which service she respects him,

A dainty scholar in the mathematics

And one she wholly  employs. Now  Dominus Practice 15

Is  yet the man appointed by Her Ladyship,

But there’s  a trick to set his cap  awry,

If I know anything. He hath  confessed

To me in private that he loves another,

My Lady’s woman, Mistress Pleasance; therefore, 20

 Secure you of rivalship.

DIAPHANOUS

I thank thee,

My noble parson. There’s five hundred pound

 Waits on thee more for that.

PALATE

 Accost the niece:

Yonder she walks alone. I’ll  move the aunt.

But here’s the gossip: she expects a  morsel. 25

Ha’ you ne’er a ring or  toy to throw away?

DIAPHANOUS

Yes, here’s a diamond of some threescore pound;

I pray you give her that.

[He offers a jewel.]

PALATE

If she will take it.

DIAPHANOUS

And there’s an emerald for the doctor too.

[He gives the jewel.]

Thou, parson, thou shalt  coin me: I am thine. 30

PALATE

Here Master Compass comes.

 [Enter] COMPASS.

Do you see My Lady

And all the rest? How they do flutter about him!

He is the  oracle of the house and  family.

Now is your time: go  nick it with the niece.

I will walk by and  hearken how the chimes go. 35

2.4  [Diaphanous courts Placentia aside;

Palate moves towards the others.]

 2.5  

COMPASS

Nay, parson, stand not off; you may approach.

This is no such  hid point of state we handle,

But you may hear it, for we are all  of counsel. –

The gentle Master Practice hath  dealt clearly

And nobly with you, madam.

LADY

Ha’ you talked with him, 5

And made the  overture?

COMPASS

Yes, first I moved

The business  trusted to me by Your Ladyship

I’your own words, almost your very   syllabes,

 Save where my memory trespassed ’gainst their elegance,

For which I hope your pardon. Then I  enlarged 10

In my own  homely style: the special goodness

And greatness of your bounty in your choice

And  free conferring of a benefit

So without  ends, conditions, any tie

But his  mere virtue; and the  value of it, 15

To  call him to your kindred, to your   veins,

Insert him in your  family, and to make him

A nephew by the offer of a niece

With such a portion; which, when he had heard

And most maturely acknowledged (as his  calling 20

Tends all unto  maturity), he returned

 A thanks as ample as the courtesy,

In my opinion; said it was a grace

Too great to be rejected or accepted

By him. But as the terms  stood with his fortune, 25

He was not to prevaricate with Your Ladyship,

But rather to require  ingenious  leave,

He might, with the same  love  that it was offered,

Refuse it, since he could not with his honesty –

 Being as he was engaged before – receive it. 30

PALATE

The same he said to me.

COMPASS

And name the party?

PALATE

 He did, and he did not.

COMPASS

Come, leave your schemes

And fine  amphibolies, parson.

PALATE

You’ll hear more.

POLISH

Why, now Your Ladyship is free to choose

The courtier, Sir Diaphanous: he shall do it. 35

I’ll move it to him myself.

LADY

What will you move to him?

POLISH

The making you a countess.

LADY

 Stint,  fond woman.

 [Polish goes aside to join Placentia and Diaphanous.]

(To Compass) Know you the party Master Practice means?

COMPASS

[To Lady] No, but your parson says he knows, madam.

LADY

[To Compass] I fear he  fables. – Parson, do you know 40

Where Master Practice is engaged?

PALATE

I’ll tell you,

But  under seal. Her mother must not know:

’Tis with Your Ladyship’s woman, Mistress Pleasance.

COMPASS

How!

LADY

 He is not  mad?

PALATE

Oh, hide the hideous secret

From  her! She’ll  trouble all else. You do  hold 45

A cricket by the wing.

COMPASS

Did he name Pleasance?

Are you sure, parson?

LADY

Oh, ’tis true,  your mistress!

I find  where your shoe wrings you, Master Compass.

But you’ll  look to him there.

 [Enter PRACTICE with INTEREST and BIAS.]

COMPASS

Yes. Here’s Sir Moth,

Your brother, with his Bias and the party 50

Deep in discourse. ’Twill be a  bargain and sale,

I see by their  close working of their heads

And running them together so  in  counsel.

LADY

Will Master Practice be of  counsel against us?

COMPASS

He is a lawyer, and must  speak for his fee 55

Against his father and mother, all his kindred,

His brothers or his sisters; no  exception

Lies at the common law.  He must not alter

Nature for form, but go on in his path –

It may be he will be  for us. Do not you 60

Offer to meddle: let them take their course,

Dispatch and marry her off to any husband.

Be not you  scrupulous. Let who can have her,

So  he lay down the portion, though he   geld it.

 It will maintain the suit against  him.  Somewhat, 65

 Something in hand is better than no birds.

He shall at last account for the utmost farthing,

 If you can keep your hand from a discharge.  [Exit Lady Loadstone.]

POLISH

[To Diaphanous] Sir, do but make her worshipful aunt a countess,

And  she is yours. Her aunt has worlds to leave you! 70

The wealth of six  East Indian fleets at least!

Her husband, Sir John Loadstone, was the governor

O’the company seven years.

DIAPHANOUS

And came there home

 Six fleets in seven years?

POLISH

I cannot tell.

I must attend my gossip, Her good Ladyship. 75[Exit.]

PLACENTIA

And will you make me a viscountess too? For

How do they make a countess? In a  chair?

Or ’pon a bed?

DIAPHANOUS

Both ways, sweet  bird: I’ll show you.

[Exeunt Placentia and Diaphanous.]

 2.6

INTEREST

 The truth is, Master Practice, now we are sure

That you are  off, we dare come on the bolder:

The portion left was sixteen thousand pound –

I do confess it as a just man should –

And call here Master Compass with these gentlemen 5

 To the relation. I will still be just.

Now  for the profits every way arising,

It was the donor’s wisdom  those should pay

Me for my  watch and breaking of my sleeps;

It is no petty charge, you know, that sum, 10

To keep a man  awake for fourteen year.

PRACTICE

But, as you  knew to use it i’that time,

It would reward your waking.

INTEREST

That’s  my industry,

As it might be your reading, study, and counsel,

And now your pleading. Who denies it you? 15

I have my calling too. Well, sir,  the contract

Is with  this gentleman, ten thousand  pound –

An ample portion for a younger brother,

With a soft, tender, delicate  rib of man’s flesh

 That he may work like wax and print upon. 20

He expects no  more than that sum to be tendered

 An he receive it: those are the conditions.

PRACTICE

A direct bargain and  sale in open market.

INTEREST

And what I have furnished him withal  o’the by

 To appear or so: a matter of four hundred, 25

To be  deduced upo’ the payment –

BIAS

Right.

You deal like a just man still.

INTEREST

 Draw up this,

Good Master Practice, for us, and be speedy.

PRACTICE

But here’s a mighty gain, sir, you have made

Of this one  stock. The  principal first doubled 30

In the first seven year, and that redoubled

I’the next seven! Beside six thousand pound,

There’s threescore thousand got in fourteen year

After the usual rate of ten i’the hundred,

And the ten thousand paid.

INTEREST

I think it be. 35

PRACTICE

How will you scape the  clamour and the  envy?

INTEREST

Let ’em exclaim and envy. What care I?

 Their murmurs raise no blisters i’my flesh.

My moneys are my blood, my parents, kindred,

And he that loves not those, he is unnatural. 40

I am persuaded that the  love of money

Is not a virtue only in a subject,

But might  befit a prince. And, were there need,

 I find me able to make good the  assertion.

To any reasonable man’s understanding. 45

And make him to confess it.

COMPASS

Gentlemen,

Doctors, and scholars, you’ll hear this and  look for

As much true  secular wit and deep  lay sense

As can be shown on such a  commonplace.

INTEREST

 First, we all know the soul of man is infinite 50

 I’ what it  covets. Who desireth knowledge

Desires it  infinitely. Who covets honour

Covets it infinitely. It will be then

No hard thing for a coveting man to prove

Or to confess he aims at  infinite wealth. 55

COMPASS

His soul  lying that way.

INTEREST

 Next, every man

Is i’the hope or possibility

Of a whole world, this present world being nothing

But the  dispersèd  issue of   the first one;

And therefore  I not see but a just man 60

May with just reason and in office ought

Propound unto  himself –

COMPASS

An infinite wealth!

I’ll bear the  burden. Go you on, Sir Moth.

INTEREST

 Thirdly, if we consider man a  member

But of the body politic, we know, 65

By just experience, that the prince hath need

More of one wealthy than ten fighting men.

COMPASS

 There you went out o’the road a little from us.

INTEREST

And therefore, if the prince’s aims be infinite,

 It must be in that which makes  all –

COMPASS

Infinite wealth. 70

INTEREST

 Fourthly, ’tis  natural to all good subjects

To  set a price on money, more than fools

Ought on their  mistress’ picture, every piece

Fro’ the penny to the twelvepence being the  hieroglyphic

And sacred  sculpture of the sovereign. 75

COMPASS

A  manifest conclusion, and a safe one.

INTEREST

  Fifthly, wealth gives a man the leading voice

At all  conventions, and  displaceth worth

With general allowance to all parties.

It makes a trade to  take the wall of virtue, 80

And the  mere issue of a shop  right honourable.

  Sixthly, it doth enable him that hath it

To the performance of all  real actions,

 Referring him to himself still, and not binding

His will to any circumstance  without him. 85

It gives him precise knowledge of himself,

For,  be he rich, he straight with evidence knows

Whether he have any compassion

Or inclination unto virtue or no;

 Where the poor  knave erroneously believes, 90

If he were rich, he would build churches or

Do such mad things.  Seventhly, your wise poor men

Have ever been contented to observe

Rich fools and so to  serve their turns upon them,

Subjecting all their wit to the  others’ wealth 95

And become  gentlemen parasites, squire bawds,

To feed their patrons’ honourable humours.

  Eighthly, ’tis certain that a man may leave

His wealth  or to his children or his friends;

 His wit he cannot so dispose by  legacy 100

As they shall be a  harington the better for’t.

COMPASS

He may   entail a jest upon his house, though,

 Enter IRONSIDE.

 Or leave a  tale to his posterity

To be told after him.

IRONSIDE

As you have done here?

T’invite your friend and brother to a feast 105

Where all the guests are so  mere  heterogene

And strangers, no man knows another, or cares

If they be Christians or  Mohammedans

That here are met!

COMPASS

 Is’t anything to you, brother,

To know religions more than those you fight for? 110

IRONSIDE

 Yes, and with whom I eat. I may  dispute,

And how shall I hold argument with such

I neither know their humours nor their heresies,

Which are religions now and so received?

 Here’s no man among these that keeps a servant 115

 T’inquire his master of, yet i’the house,

I hear it  buzzed, there are a  brace of doctors,

A fool and a physician, with a courtier

That feeds on mulberry leaves like a true silkworm,

A lawyer, and a mighty money-bawd, 120

Sir  Moth, has brought his politic Bias with him:

A man of a most  animadverting humour,

Who, to endear himself unto  his lord,

Will tell  him, you and I, or any of us

That here are met, are all  pernicious spirits 125

And men of  pestilent purpose  meanly  affected

Unto the state we live in; and beget

Himself a thanks with the great men o’the time

By breeding  jealousies in them of us;

Shall  cross our fortunes, frustrate our  endeavours, 130

Twice seven years after. And this trick be called

 Cutting of throats with a whispering or a  penknife.

 [He draws his sword]

I must cut  his throat now.  I’m bound in honour

And by the law of arms to see it done.

I dare to do it, and I dare  profess 135

The doing of it, being to such a  rascal,

Who is the common  offence grown of mankind

And worthy to be torn up from society.

COMPASS

You shall not do it here, sir.

IRONSIDE

Why? Will you

 Entreat yourself into a beating for him, 140

My courteous brother? If you will,  have at you.

No man deserves it better, now I think on’t,

Than you, that will keep  consort with such  fiddlers,

 Pragmatic  flies, fools,  publicans, and moths,

And leave your honest and  adopted brother! 145

INTEREST

  Best  raise the house upon him to  secure  us –

He’ll kill us all!

PALATE

I love no  blades in belts!

RUT

Nor I!

BIAS

Would I were at my  shop again

In court, safe stowed up with my politic  bundles!

[Exeunt Interest, Palate, Rut, and Bias in a panic.]

COMPASS

How they are scattered!

IRONSIDE

Run away like  cimici 150

Into the crannies of a rotten bedstead.

COMPASS

I told you such a  passage would disperse ’em,

Although the house were their  fee-simple in law,

And they possessed of all the blessings in it.

IRONSIDE

Pray heaven they be not frighted from their stomachs 155

That so My Lady’s table be  disfurnished

Of the provisions!

COMPASS

No, the parson’s calling

By this time all the  covey again together.

Here comes good tidings!

  [Enter] PLEASANCE.

Dinner’s o’the board.

 [Exeunt Ironside and Practice.]

[Compass and Pleasance remain, drawn together.]

 2.7

COMPASS

 Stay, Mistress Pleasance, I must ask you a question:

Ha’ you any  suits in law?

PLEASANCE

I, Master Compass?

COMPASS

Answer me  briefly; it is dinner time.

They say you have  retained  brisk Master Practice

Here of your counsel, and are to be  joined 5

A  patentee with him.

PLEASANCE

In what? Who says so?

You are disposed to jest.

COMPASS

No, I am in earnest.

It is given out i’the house so, I assure you.

But keep your  right to yourself and not  acquaint

A  common lawyer with your  case. If he 10

Once find the  gap, a thousand will  leap after.

I’ll tell you more anon.  [Exit.]

PLEASANCE

This  riddle shows

A little like a  love-trick, o’one face,

If I could understand it. I will  study it. [Exit.]

 CHORUS 2

DAMPLAY

 But whom doth your poet mean now by this – Master Bias? What

lord’s secretary doth he purpose to  personate or  perstringe?

BOY

You might as well ask me what alderman or alderman’s   mate he meant by

Sir Moth Interest; or what eminent lawyer by the ridiculous Master Practice,

who hath rather his name  invented for laughter than any offence or injury 5

it can stick on the reverend  professors of the law. And so the wise ones will

think.

PROBEE

It is an insidious question, brother Damplay.  Iniquity itself would

not have urged it. It is picking the lock of the scene, not opening it the fair way

with a key. A play, though it  apparel and present  vices in general, flies from 10

all particularities in persons. Would you ask of Plautus and Terence, if they

lived now, who were  Davus or  Pseudolus in the scene? Who  Pyrgopolinices or

 Thraso? Who  Euclio or  Menedemus?

BOY

Yes, he would. And inquire of Martial, or any other epigrammatist, whom

he meant by  Titius or Seius – the common John à Noke or John à  Stile – under 15

whom they note all vices and errors  taxable to the times! As if there could not

be a name for a folly fitted to the stage, but there must be a person in nature

found out to own it.

DAMPLAY

Why, I can   fancy a person to myself, boy. Who shall hinder me?

BOY

And, in not  publishing him, you do no man an injury. But if you will  utter 20

your own ill meaning on that person under the author’s words,  you make a

libel of his comedy.

DAMPLAY

Oh, he told us that in a  prologue long since.

BOY

If you do the same  reprehensible ill things, still the same  reprehension will

serve you, though you heard it afore. They are his own words. I can invent no 25

better, nor he.

PROBEE

It is the  solemn  vice of interpretation that deforms the figure of many

a fair scene by  drawing it awry, and indeed is the  civil  murder of most good

plays. If I see a thing  vively presented on the stage, that the  glass of custom,

which is comedy, is so held up to me by the poet as I can therein view the daily 30

examples of men’s lives and images of truth in their manners, so drawn for my

 delight or profit as I may either way use them, and will I – rather than make

that true use – hunt out the persons to defame by my  malice of misapplying?

And imperil the innocence and candour of the author  by  his calumny? It is

an unjust way of hearing and beholding plays, this, and most unbecoming a 35

gentleman to appear malignantly witty  in another’s work.

BOY

They are no other but narrow and shrunk natures, shrivelled  up poor

things that cannot think well of themselves, who dare to  detract others. That

 signature is upon them, and it will last. A half-witted barbarism which  no

barber’s art or his  balls will ever  expunge or take out! 40

DAMPLAY

Why,  boy, this were a strange  empire, or rather a tyranny, you would

 entitle your poet to, over gentlemen: that they should come to hear and see

plays, and say nothing for their money?

BOY

Oh, yes, say what you will, so it be  to purpose and  in place.

DAMPLAY

Can anything be out of purpose at a play? I see no reason, if I come 45

here and give my eighteen pence or two shillings for my seat, but I should take

it out in censure on the stage.

BOY

Your two shillingworth is allowed you, but you will take your  ten shillingworth,

your twenty shillingworth, and more. And teach others about you to

do the like, that follow your leading face, as if you were  to cry up or down every 50

scene  by confederacy, be it right or wrong.

DAMPLAY

Who should teach us the right or wrong at a play?

BOY

If your own  science cannot do it, or the love of modesty and truth, all

other entreaties or attempts – are vain. You are fitter spectators for the  bears

than us, or the  puppets. This is a  popular ignorance indeed, somewhat better 55

 apparelled in you than the people, but a  hard-handed and stiff ignorance,

worthy a   trowel- or a hammer-man, and not only fit to be scorned, but to be

triumphed o’er.

DAMPLAY

 By whom, boy?

BOY

 No particular, but the general neglect and silence. Good Master Damplay, 60

be yourself still without a  second. Few here are of your opinion today, I hope;

tomorrow, I am sure there will be none, when they have ruminated this.

PROBEE

Let us mind what you come for, the play, which will draw on to the

 epitasis now.

3.1   [Enter] ITEM, NEEDLE,  [and Nurse] KEEP.

ITEM

 Where’s Master Doctor?

NEEDLE

Oh, Master Tim Item,

His learnèd  ’pothecary! You are welcome.

He is  within at dinner.

ITEM

Dinner? Death!

That he will eat now, having such a business

That so concerns him!

NEEDLE

 Why, can any business 5

Concern a man like his meat?

ITEM

Oh,  twenty millions,

To a physician that’s in practice. I

Do bring him  news from all the  points o’the compass

(That’s all the parts of the  sublunary globe)

Of  times and  double times.

NEEDLE

In, in, sweet Item, 10

And  furnish forth the table with your news.

 Deserve your dinner.  Sow out your whole bag full.

The guests will hear it.

ITEM

 [Peering offstage] I heard they were  out.

NEEDLE

But they are  pieced and put together again.

You may go in. You’ll find them at  high eating. 15

The parson has an  edifying  stomach

And a  persuading palate (like his name):

He hath begun three draughts of  sack  in  doctrines

And four in uses.

ITEM

And they follow  him?

NEEDLE

No, Sir Diaphanous is a  recusant 20

In sack. He only takes it in French wine

With an  allay of water. In, in, Item,

And leave your peeping.  [Exit Item.]

KEEP

I have  a month’s mind

To peep a little too. [Needle prevents her.] Sweet Mas’ Needle,

How are they  set?

NEEDLE

At the  board’s end My Lady – 25

KEEP

And my young  mistress by her?

NEEDLE

Yes. The parson

On the right hand (as he’ll not lose his place

 For thrusting) and  ’gainst him Mistress Polish.

Next, Sir Diaphanous against Sir Moth:

Knights, one again another. Then the soldier, 30

The man of war, and man of peace, the lawyer;

Then the  pert doctor and the politic Bias,

And Master Compass  circumscribeth all.

 A noise within. [Enter] PLEASANCE.

PLEASANCE

Nurse Keep, Nurse Keep!

NEEDLE

What noise is that within?

PLEASANCE

Come to my  mistress! All their  weapons are out! 35

NEEDLE

 Mischief of men! What day, what hour is this?

KEEP

Run for the  cellar of strong  waters – quickly!  [Exit Needle.]

[Exeunt Pleasance and Keep as if to the offstage dining-room.]

3.2     To them after [enter] COMPASS [and] IRONSIDE.

COMPASS

Were you a madman to do this at table?

And trouble all the guests, to affright the ladies

And gentlewomen?

IRONSIDE

Pox upo’ your women

And your half-man there,  Court-Sir Ambergris!

A perfumed  braggart! He must drink his wine 5

With three parts water, and have  amber in that too.

COMPASS

And you must therefore  break his face with a glass

And wash his nose in wine?

IRONSIDE

Cannot he drink

 In orthodox, but he must have his  gums

And   paynim drugs? 

COMPASS

You should have used the  glass 10

Rather as  balance than the sword of  justice,

But you have cut his face with it. He bleeds.

Come, you shall take your  sanctuary with me;

The whole house will be up in arms ’gainst you else,

Within this half-hour. This way to my lodging. 15

 [Exeunt Compass and Ironside.]

 [Enter] RUT, LADY [LOADSTONE], POLISH, [and] KEEP, carrying PLACENTIA over the stage, [assisted by] PLEASANCE [and] ITEM.

RUT

 A most  rude action! Carry her to her bed,

And use the  fricace to her with those oils.

 Keep your news, Item, now, and  tend this business.

LADY

[To Polish] Good gossip, look to her.

POLISH

[To Placentia] How do you, sweet charge?

KEEP

She’s in a  sweat.

POLISH

Ay, and a  faint sweat, marry! 20

RUT

 Let her alone to Tim: he has directions.

I’ll hear your news, Tim Item, when you ha’ done.

 [Exeunt Item, Polish, Keep, and Pleasance, carrying Placentia.]

LADY

Was ever such a guest brought to my table?

RUT

These  boisterous soldiers ha’ no better breeding.

[Enter COMPASS.]

Here Master Compass comes. – Where’s your captain, 25

 Rudhudibras  de Ironside?

COMPASS

Gone out of doors.

LADY

Would he had ne’er come in them, I may wish.

He has discredited my house and board

With his rude  swaggering manners, and endangered

My niece’s health by drawing of his weapon – 30

God knows how  far, for Master Doctor does not.

COMPASS

The doctor is an ass then if he say so,

And cannot with his conjuring names,  Hippocrates,

Galen, or Rasis, Avicen, Averroes,

Cure a poor wench’s falling in a swoon, 35

Which a  poor farthing  changed in  rosa solis

Or  cinnamon water would.

 [Enter KEEP and POLISH.]

LADY

How now? How does she?

KEEP

She’s somewhat better. Master Item has brought her

A little about.

POLISH

But there’s Sir Moth, your brother,

Is fallen into a fit o’the  happyplex. 40

It were a  happy place for him and us

If he could steal to heaven thus. All the house

Are calling ‘Master Doctor! Master Doctor!’

The parson, he has  gi’en him gone this half-hour;

He’s pale in the mouth already for the fear 45

O’the fierce captain. [Exit Rut.]

LADY

Help me to my chamber,

Nurse Keep. Would I could see the day no more,

But night hung over me like some dark cloud

That, buried with this  loss of my good name,

I and my house might perish, thus forgotten – 50

 [Exeunt Lady Loadstone, Keep, and Polish.]

COMPASS

Her taking it to heart thus more afflicts me

Than all these accidents, for they’ll blow over.

3.3    [Enter] PRACTICE [and Sir DIAPHANOUS].

PRACTICE

It was a barbarous injury, I confess,

 But if you will be counselled, sir, by me,

The  reverend law lies open to repair

Your reputation. That will gi’ you  damages:

Five thousand pound for a finger, I have known 5

Given in court. And let me  pack your jury.

DIAPHANOUS

  There’s nothing vexes me but that he has stained

My new white satin doublet, and bespattered

My  spick and span silk stockings,  o’the day

They were drawn on. And here’s a spot i’my  hose too. 10

COMPASS

 Shrewd maims! Your clothes are wounded desperately,

And that, I think, troubles a courtier more,

An  exact courtier, than a gash in his flesh.

DIAPHANOUS

My flesh? I swear, had he giv’n me twice so much,

I never should ha’  reckoned it. But my clothes 15

To be  defaced and  stigmatized so foully!

I take it as a  contumely done me

 Above the wisdom of our laws to right.

COMPASS

Why then, you’ll  challenge him?

DIAPHANOUS

I will  advise,

Though Master Practice here doth urge the law 20

And reputation it will make me  of credit,

 Beside great damages (let him pack my jury).

COMPASS

[Aside]  He speaks like Master Practice, one that is

The child of a profession he’s  vowed to

And servant to the study he hath taken, 25

A  pure  apprentice at law! [Aloud] But you must have

The  counsel o’the sword, and  square your action

Unto their  canons and that brotherhood

If you do right.

PRACTICE

I tell you, Master Compass,

 You speak not like a friend unto the laws, 30

 Nor scarce a subject, to persuade him thus

Unto the breach o’the peace. Sir, you forget

There is a  court above, o’the  Star Chamber,

To punish  routs and riots.

COMPASS

No, young master,

 Although your name be Practice there in term time, 35

I do remember it. But you’ll not hear

What I was bound to say, but, like a  wild

Young haggard justice,  fly at breach o’the peace

Before you know whether the  amorous knight

Dares  break the peace of conscience in a duel. 40

DIAPHANOUS

Troth, Master Compass, I take you my  friend;

You shall  appoint of me in any matter

That’s reasonable, so we may meet  fair

 On even terms.

COMPASS

I shall persuade no other;

 And take your learnèd counsel to advise you. 45

I’ll  run along with him. You say you’ll meet him

On even terms. I do not see indeed

How that can be, ’twixt Ironside and you,

Now I consider it. He is my  brother,

I do confess – we ha’  called so twenty year – 50

But you are, sir, a knight in court,  allied there,

And so befriended, you may easily  answer

 The worst success. He, a known, noted, bold

 Boy o’the sword, hath all men’s eyes upon him;

 And there’s no London jury but are led 55

In evidence as far by common fame

As they are by present deposition.

Then you have many brethren and near kinsmen.

If he kill you, it will be a lasting quarrel

 ’Twixt them and him. Whereas Rud Ironside, 60

Although he ha’ got his head into a  beaver

With a huge  feather, ’s but a  currier’s son,

And has not two  old  Cordovan skins to leave

In leather caps to  mourn him in, if he die.

Again, you are generally beloved, he hated 65

So much, that all the hearts and  votes of men

Go with you in the wishing all prosperity

Unto your purpose. He’s a  fat,  corpulent,

 Unwieldy fellow; you, a  dieted spark,

Fit for the combat. He has killed so many 70

As it is ten to one his turn is next;

You never fought with any,  less slew any,

And therefore have the hopes before you.

I hope these things thus specified unto you

Are fair advantages: you cannot encounter 75

Him upon equal terms. Beside, Sir Silkworm,

He hath done you wrong in a most high degree,

And sense of such an injury received

Should so  exacuate and  whet your choler

As you should count yourself  an host of men 80

Compared to him. And therefore you, brave sir,

Have no more reason to provoke or challenge

Him than the huge  great porter has to try

His strength upon an infant.

DIAPHANOUS

Master Compass,

You rather spur me on than any way 85

 Abate my courage to the enterprise.

COMPASS

 All counsel’s as it’s taken.  If you stand

On point of honour not t’have any odds,

I have rather then dissuaded you than otherwise;

If upon terms of humour and revenge, 90

I have encouraged you. So that I think

I have done the part of a friend  on either side:

In  furnishing your fear with matter first,

If you have any; or, if you dare fight,

To heighten and confirm your  resolution. 95

PRACTICE

I now do crave your pardon, Master Compass.

I did not  apprehend your way before,

The true  perimeter of it: you have circles

And such fine draughts about!

DIAPHANOUS

Sir, I do thank you,

I thank you, Master Compass, heartily. 100

I must confess I never fought before,

And I’ll be glad to do things orderly,

In the right place. I pray you instruct me.

Is’t best fight ambitiously or maliciously?

COMPASS

Sir, if you never fought before, be wary. 105

 Trust not yourself too much.

DIAPHANOUS

Why? I assure you

 I’m very angry.

COMPASS

 Do not suffer, though,

The  flatuous, windy choler of your heart

To move the  clapper of your understanding,

Which is the guiding faculty, your reason. 110

You know not if you’ll fight or no, being brought

Upo’ the place.

DIAPHANOUS

Oh, yes, I have imagined

Him trebled-armed, provoked too, and  as furious

As Homer makes Achilles; and I find

Myself not frighted with his fame one  jot. 115

COMPASS

 Well, yet take heed. These fights imaginary

Are less than  skirmishes, the fight of shadows:

For shadows have their figure, motion,

And their  umbratile action from the real

Posture and motion of the  body’s act; 120

Whereas imaginarily many times

Those men may fight, dare scarce eye one another,

And much less meet. But if there be no help,

Faith, I would wish you send him a fair challenge.

DIAPHANOUS

I will go pen it  presently.

COMPASS

But word it 125

In the most  generous terms.

DIAPHANOUS

 Let me alone.

PRACTICE

And silken phrase: the courtliest kind of quarrel.

 [Exit Diaphanous.]

  COMPASS

He’ll make it a  petition for his peace.

PRACTICE

Oh, yes,  of right, and he may do it by law.  [Exeunt.]

3.4   [Enter] RUT, PALATE, BIAS, bringing out INTEREST in a chair, ITEM [and] POLISH following.

RUT

Come, bring him out into the air a little:

There set him down.   Bow him; yet bow him more.

 [Palate and Bias attempt to bend Interest’s head to his knees.]

Dash that same glass of water in his face.

[Palate splashes Interest with water.]

Now tweak him by the nose.

[Bias pulls Interest’s nose.]

Hard, harder yet:

If it but call the blood up from the heart, 5

I ask no more. See what a  fear can do!

[Bias pulls harder.]

Pinch him in the nape of the neck now.

 [Item hesitates.]

Nip him, nip him!

 [Rut demonstrates, pinching Interest, who startles.]

ITEM

He feels; there’s life in him.

PALATE

He  groans and stirs.

RUT

Tell him the captain’s gone.

INTEREST

Ha!

PALATE

He’s gone, sir.

RUT

Gi’ him a box, hard, hard, on his left ear. 10

  [No one moves; Rut strikes Interest on his ear.]

INTEREST

Oh!

RUT

 How do you feel yourself?

INTEREST

Sore, sore!

RUT

But where?

INTEREST

I’my neck.

RUT

[To the others] I nipped him there.

INTEREST

And i’my head.

RUT

I boxed him twice or thrice to move those sinews.

BIAS

I swear you did.

POLISH

What a brave man’s a doctor,

To beat one into health! I thought his blows 15

Would e’en ha’ killed him. He did feel no more

Than a great horse.

INTEREST

Is the wild captain gone,

That man of murder?

BIAS

All is calm and quiet.

INTEREST

Say you so,  Cousin Bias? Then  all’s well.

PALATE

How quickly a man is lost!

BIAS

And soon recovered! 20

POLISH

Where there are means and doctors, learnèd men

And their apothecaries, who are not now,

As  Chaucer says, their friendship to begin.

Well could they teach each other how to win

 I’their swath-bands –

RUT

Leave your poetry, good  gossip, 25

Your Chaucer’s  clouts, and wash your dishes with ’em.

We must  rub up the roots of his disease,

And crave your peace awhile, or else your absence.

POLISH

Nay, I know when to hold my peace.

RUT

Then do it.

Gi’ me your hand, Sir Moth. Let’s feel your pulse. 30

It is a  pursiness, a kind of  stoppage,

Or  tumour o’the  purse, for want of exercise,

That you are troubled with: some  ligatures

 I’th’neck of your  vesica or  marsupium

Are so close- knit that you cannot  evaporate, 35

And therefore you must use  relaxatives.

Beside, they say you are so  restive grown,

You cannot but with trouble put your hand

Into your pocket to  discharge a reckoning,

And this we sons of physic do call  chiragra, 40

A kind of cramp or hand-gout. You shall  purge for’t.

ITEM

Indeed, Your Worship should do well  t’advise him

To cleanse his body  all the three high ways:

That is, by  sweat, purge, and phlebotomy.

RUT

You say well, learnèd Tim. I’ll first prescribe him 45

To give his purse a purge once, twice a week

At dice or cards. And when the weather is open,

Sweat at a bowling alley; or be let blood

I’the lending  vein, and bleed a matter of fifty

Or threescore ounces at a time. Then put 50

Your thumbs under your  girdle and have somebody

Else pull out your purse for you, till with more ease

And a good  habit you can do it yourself.

And then be sure always to keep good diet,

And  ha’ your table furnished from one end 55

Unto the tother: it is good for the eyes,

But feed you on one dish still; ha’ your  diet-drink

Even in bottles ready, which must come

From the  King’s Head. I will prescribe you nothing

But what I’ll  take before you mine own self. 60

That is my course with all my patients.

PALATE

Very methodical,  secundum artem.

BIAS

And very safe  pro captu recipientis.

POLISH

All  errant learnèd men, how they  ’spute Latin!

RUT

I had it of a Jew, and a great rabbi, 65

Who every morning  cast his cup of white wine

With sugar and, by the  residence i’the bottom,

Would make report of any chronic malady,

Such as Sir Moth’s is, being an  oppilation

In that you call the neck o’the money bladder, 70

Most  anatomical and by dissection.

 Enter Nurse [KEEP].

KEEP

Oh, Master Doctor, and his ’pothecary,

Good Master Item, and my Mistress Polish!

We need you all above! She’s fallen again

In a worse  fit than ever.

POLISH

Who?

KEEP

Your charge. 75

POLISH

Come away, gentlemen.

 [Exeunt Polish, Keep, Palate, Rut, and Item.]

INTEREST

This fit with the doctor

Hath  mended me past expectation.  [Exit.]

[Bias remains alone.]

3.5   [Enter] COMPASS, [Sir] DIAPHANOUS, [holding a letter, and] PRACTICE.

COMPASS

Oh, Sir Diaphanous, ha’ you done?

DIAPHANOUS

I ha’ brought it.

PRACTICE

That’s well.

COMPASS

But who shall carry it now?

DIAPHANOUS

A friend.

I’ll find a friend to carry it. Master Bias here

 Will not deny me that.

BIAS

What is’t?

DIAPHANOUS

To carry

A challenge I have writ unto the captain. 5

BIAS

Faith, but I will, sir, you shall pardon me.

For a  twi-reason of state, I’ll bear no challenges;

I will not  hazard my lord’s favour so,

Or  forfeit mine own judgement with His Honour

To turn a  ruffian. I have to commend me 10

 Naught but His Lordship’s good opinion,

And  to’t my calligraphy, a fair hand

Fit for a secretary. Now you know a man’s hand,

 Being his executing part in fight,

Is more  obnoxious to the  common peril – 15

DIAPHANOUS

You shall not fight, sir; you shall only  search

My antagonist,  commit us fairly there

Upo’ the ground on equal terms.

BIAS

Oh, sir!

But if my lord should hear I  stood at end

Of any quarrel, ’twere an end of me 20

In a  state course. I ha’  read the politics,

And heard th’opinions of our best divines.

COMPASS

The gentleman has reason. Where was first

The birth of your acquaintance, or the cradle

Of your  strict friendship made?

DIAPHANOUS

We met in France, sir. 25

COMPASS

In France, that garden of  humanity,

The very  seed-plot of all courtesies!

 I wonder that your friendship sucked that aliment,

The milk of France, and  see this sour effect

It doth produce ’gainst all the sweets of travel: 30

There, every gentleman  professing arms

Thinks he is bound in honour to embrace

The bearing of a challenge for another

Without  or questioning the cause or asking

Least  colour of reason. There’s no cowardice, 35

No  poltroonery  like urging why? wherefore?

But carry a challenge, die, and do the thing.

BIAS

Why, hear you, Master Compass, I but crave

Your ear in private.  [Aside to him] I would carry his challenge,

 If I but hoped your captain angry enough 40

To kill him. For, to tell you truth, this knight

Is an  impertinent in court, we think him,

And troubles my lord’s lodgings and his table

With frequent and unnecessary visits,

Which we (the better  sort of  servants) like not, 45

Being his  fellows in all other places

But our master’s board, and we disdain

To do those  servile offices oft times

His foolish pride and  empire will exact

Against the heart or humour of a gentleman. 50

COMPASS

Truth, Master Bias, I’d not ha’ you think

I speak to flatter you, but you are one

O’ the deepest  politics I ever met,

And the most subtly rational. I admire you.

But do not you conceive in such a case 55

That you are   accessory to his death,

From whom you carry a challenge with such  purpose?

BIAS

Sir,  the corruption of one thing in nature

Is held the generation of another,

And therefore I had  as lief be accessory 60

Unto his death as to his life.

COMPASS

A new

Moral philosophy too! You’ll carry’t  then?

BIAS

If I were sure ’twould not  incense  his choler

To  beat the messenger.

COMPASS

 Oh, I’ll  secure you.

You shall deliver it in my  lodging safely, 65

And do your friend a service worthy thanks.

BIAS

I’ll venture it, upon so good  induction,

To rid the court of an  impediment,

This  baggage knight.

 Enter IRONSIDE.

IRONSIDE

Peace to you all, gentlemen,

 Save to this  mushroom, who I hear is menacing 70

Me with a challenge, which I come to anticipate

And  save the law a labour. [To Diaphanous] Will you fight, sir?

DIAPHANOUS

Yes, in my shirt. [He takes off his doublet.]

IRONSIDE

Oh, that’s to save your doublet;

I know it a court trick! You had rather have

An  ulcer in your body than a  pink 75

More i’your clothes.

DIAPHANOUS

Captain, you are a coward

If you not fight i’your shirt. [He draws his sword.]

IRONSIDE

Sir, I  not mean

To put it off for that, nor yet my doublet. [He draws his sword.]

  You’ve cause to call me coward, that more fear

 The stroke of the common and  life-giving air 80

Than all your fury and the  panoply.

PRACTICE

Which is at best but a thin linen armour.

I think a cup of  generous wine were better

Than fighting i’your shirts.

DIAPHANOUS

Sir, sir, my valour,

It is a valour of another nature 85

Than to be mended by a cup of wine.

COMPASS

 I should be glad to hear of any valours

Differing in kind, who have known hitherto

Only one  virtue they call fortitude

Worthy the name of valour.

IRONSIDE

 Which who hath not 90

Is justly thought a coward. And  he is such.

DIAPHANOUS

Oh, you ha’ read the play there,  The New Inn

Of Jonson’s, that  decries all other valour

But what is for the public.

IRONSIDE

I do that too,

But did not learn it there. I think no valour 95

 Lies for a private cause.

DIAPHANOUS

Sir, I’ll  redargue you

By disputation.

COMPASS

Oh, let’s hear this!

I long to hear a man dispute in his shirt

Of valour, and his sword drawn in his hand.

PRACTICE

His valour will  take cold. Put on your doublet. 100

COMPASS

His valour will  keep cold, you are deceived,

And  relish much the sweeter in our ears;

It may be too  i’the ordinance of nature.

Their valours are not yet so  combatant

Or truly antagonistic as to fight, 105

But may admit to hear of some  divisions

Of fortitude  may put ’em off their quarrel.

DIAPHANOUS

I would have no man think me so ungoverned

Or subject to my  passion but I can

 Read him a lecture  ’twixt my undertakings 110

And executions. I do know all kinds

Of doing the business which the town calls valour.

COMPASS

[To Practice] Yes, he has  read the town.  Towntop’s his author!

[To Diaphanous]  Your first?

DIAPHANOUS

Is a rash headlong  unexperience.

COMPASS

Which is in children, fools, or your street gallants 115

 O’the first head.

PRACTICE

A pretty kind of valour!

COMPASS

[To Practice]  Commend him, he will spin it out in’s shirt

Fine as that thread.

DIAPHANOUS

 The next, an indiscreet

Presumption, grounded upon  often scapes.

COMPASS

 Or th’insuffiency of adversaries, 120

And this is in your common fighting brothers,

Your old perdus who, after a time, do think,

The one, that they are   shot-free, the  other, sword- free.

[To Diaphanous] Your third?

DIAPHANOUS

Is naught but an excess of choler

That reigns in  testy old men –

COMPASS

Noblemen’s porters 125

And  self-conceited poets.

DIAPHANOUS

And is rather

A  peevishness than any part of valour.

PRACTICE

 [To Compass] He but rehearses; he concludes no valour.

COMPASS

[To Practice] A  history of distempers as they are practised,

His  harangue undertaketh, and no more. 130

[To Diaphanous] Your next?

DIAPHANOUS

Is a dull  desperate resolving –

COMPASS

In case of some  necessitous misery, or

 Incumbent mischief.

PRACTICE

Narrowness of mind,

Or ignorance being the root of it.

DIAPHANOUS

Which  you shall find in  gamesters quite  blown up. 135

COMPASS

Bankrupt merchants, undiscovered traitors.

PRACTICE

Or your  exemplified malefactors

That have survived their infamy and punishment.

COMPASS

One that hath  lost his ears by a just sentence

O’the  Star Chamber, a right valiant knave – 140

And is a  histrionical  contempt

Of what a man fears most, it being a  mischief

In his own  apprehension unavoidable.

PRACTICE

Which  is in cowards wounded mortally,

Or thieves adjudged to die.

COMPASS

This is a valour 145

I should desire much to see encouraged,

As being a special entertainment

For our  rogue people, and make oft  good sport

Unto ’em from the gallows to the ground.

DIAPHANOUS

But mine is a judicial resolving 150

Or  liberal undertaking of a danger –

COMPASS

That might be avoided.

DIAPHANOUS

Ay, and with assurance

That it is found in noblemen and gentlemen

Of the best  sheaf.

COMPASS

 Who having lives to lose,

Like private men, have yet a world of honour, 155

And public reputation to defend –

DIAPHANOUS

Which in the brave historified Greeks

And Romans you shall read of.

COMPASS

And, no doubt,

 Many in our aldermen meet it, and their deputies,

The soldiers of the city, valiant blades, 160

Who, rather than their houses should be ransacked,

Would fight it out like so many wild beasts,

Not for the fury they are commonly armed with,

But the close manner of their fight and custom

Of joining head to head and foot to foot. 165

IRONSIDE

And which of these so  well-pressed resolutions

Am I to encounter now? For commonly

Men that have so much choice before ’em have

Some trouble to  resolve of any one.

BIAS

There are three valours yet which Sir Diaphanous 170

Hath,  with his leave, not touched.

DIAPHANOUS

Yea? Which are those?

PRACTICE

[To Compass] He  perks at that!

COMPASS

[To Practice] Nay, he does more: he  chatters.

BIAS

A philosophical contempt of death

Is one. Then, an  infused kind of valour

Wrought in us by our  genii or good spirits, 175

Of which the gallant  ethnics had deep sense,

Who generally held that no great statesman,

Scholar, or soldier e’er did anything

 Sine divino aliquo afflatu.

PRACTICE

But there’s a Christian valour ’bove these too. 180

BIAS

Which is a quiet  patient toleration

Of whatsoever the malicious world

With injury doth unto you, and consists

In  passion more than action, Sir Diaphanous.

DIAPHANOUS

 Sure, I do take mine to be Christian valour – 185

COMPASS

 You may mistake, though. Can you justify

On any cause this seeking to deface

The  divine image in a man?

BIAS

Oh, sir!

Let ’em alone! Is not Diaphanous

As much a divine image as is Ironside? 190

Let  images fight, if they will fight,  a’ God’s name.

3.6    To them intervening, [enter Nurse] KEEP.

KEEP

Where’s Master Needle? Saw you Master Needle?

We are undone!

COMPASS

What ails the  frantic nurse?

KEEP

My mistress is undone, she’s crying out!

Where is this man,  trow? Master Needle?

[Enter] NEEDLE.

NEEDLE

Here.

KEEP

Run for  the party, Mistress Chair, the midwife. – 5

Nay, look how the man stands, as he were   gowked!

She’s lost, if you not  haste away the party.

NEEDLE

Where is the doctor?

KEEP

Where a  scoffing man is,

 And his apothecary little better.

They laugh and jeer at all. Will you  dispatch? 10

And fetch the party quickly to our mistress.

We are all undone! The  tympany will out else!

 [Exeunt Keep and Needle.]

[Enter] INTEREST.

INTEREST

News, news, good news, better than  buttered news!

My niece is found with child, the doctor tells me,

And fallen in labour.

COMPASS

How?

INTEREST

The portion’s  paid! 15

The portion –  Oh, the captain! Is he here?  Exit.

PRACTICE

 He’s spied your swords out. Put ’em up, put up!

You’ve driven him hence; and yet your quarrel’s ended.

IRONSIDE

In a most strange  discovery.

PRACTICE

Of  light gold.

DIAPHANOUS

And  cracked within the ring. I take the omen 20

As a good omen.  

PRACTICE

Then put up your sword, [Exit Compass.]

And  on your doublet. Give the captain thanks.

[Diaphanous and Ironside sheathe their swords.]

DIAPHANOUS

[Putting on his doublet] I had been  slurred else. Thank you,

noble  captain!

Your quarrelling caused all this.

IRONSIDE

Where’s Compass?

PRACTICE

Gone,

 Shrunk  hence,  contracted to his centre, I fear. 25

IRONSIDE

The  slip is his, then.

DIAPHANOUS

 I had like t’have been

Abused i’the business, had the slip slurred on me,

A counterfeit.

BIAS

Sir, we are all  abused,

As many as were  brought on to be suitors,

And we will join in thanks, all to the captain, 30

And to his  fortune that so  brought us off.  [Exeunt.]

 CHORUS 3

DAMPLAY

This was a pitiful poor  shift o’your poet, boy, to make his  prime

woman with child and fall in labour just to  compose a quarrel.

BOY

With whose borrowed ears have you heard, sir, all this while, that you can

mistake the  current of our scene so? The stream of the  argument threatened

her being with child from the very beginning, for it presented her in the 5

first of the second act with some apparent note of infirmity or defect, from

knowledge of which the  auditory were rightly to be  suspended by the author

till the quarrel, which was but the  accidental cause, hastened on the discovery

of it in occasioning her affright, which made her fall into her  throes presently,

and within that  compass of time allowed to the comedy wherein the poet 10

expressed his  prime  artifice, rather than any error that the detection of her

being with child should  determine the quarrel which had produced it.

PROBEE

The boy is too hard for you, Brother Damplay. Best  mark the play,

and let him alone.

DAMPLAY

I care not for marking the play. I’ll damn it, talk, and do that I come 15

for. I will not have gentlemen lose their  privilege, nor I myself my  prerogative,

for ne’er an  overgrown or  superannuated poet of ’em all! He shall not give me

the law. I will  censure, and be witty, and take my  tobacco, and enjoy my  Magna

Carta of reprehension, as my predecessors have done before me.

BOY

Even to  licence and absurdity. 20

PROBEE

Not now, because the gentlewoman is in  travail and the midwife may

 come on the sooner, to put her and us out of our pain.

DAMPLAY

Well, look to your business afterward, boy, that all things be clear

and come properly forth,  suited and set together; for I will  search what

follows severely and  to the nail. 25

BOY

Let your nail run smooth then and not scratch, lest the author be bold

to  pare it to the quick and make it  smart. You’ll find him as severe as yourself.

DAMPLAY

A  shrewd boy, and  has me everywhere! The midwife is come; she has

made haste.

4.1   [Enter Mother] CHAIR [and] NEEDLE.

CHAIR

Stay, Master Needle, you do  prick too fast

Upo’ the business. I must take some breath.

Lend me my  stool. You ha’ drawn a  stitch upon me,

In faith,  son Needle, with your haste.

NEEDLE

 Good mother,

 Piece up this breach; I’ll gi’ you a new gown, 5

A new silk   grogram gown. I’ll do’t, mother.

 [Enter Nurse] KEEP.

KEEP

What’ll you do? You ha’ done too much already

With your  prick-seam, and  through- stitch, Master Needle. –

I pray you sit not fabling here old tales,

Good Mother Chair, the midwife,  but  come up. 10

 [Exeunt Mother Chair and Needle.]

4.2   [Enter] COMPASS [and] PRACTICE.

COMPASS

How now, nurse, where’s My Lady?

KEEP

In her  chamber

Locked up, I think. She’ll speak with nobody.

COMPASS

Knows she o’this accident?

KEEP

Alas, sir, no.

Would she might never know it!  [Exit.]

PRACTICE

I think Her Ladyship

Too virtuous and too nobly innocent 5

To  have a hand in so  ill-formed a business.

COMPASS

Your thought, sir, is a brave thought and a safe one;

The child now to be born is not more free

From the  aspersion of all  spot than she.

 She have her hand in plot ’gainst Master  Practice, 10

If there were nothing else, whom she so loves,

 Cries up, and values? Knows to be a man

Marked out for a chief justice in his cradle?

Or a  lord paramount, the  head o’the Hall,

The  top or the top-gallant of our law? 15

Assure yourself, she could not so  deprave

The rectitude of her judgement to wish you

Unto a wife  might prove your infamy,

Whom she esteemed that part o’the commonwealth

 And had up for honour to her blood. 20

PRACTICE

I must confess a great  beholdingness

Unto Her Ladyship’s offer and good wishes.

But the truth is, I never had  affection

Or any liking to this niece of hers.

COMPASS

You foresaw somewhat, then?

PRACTICE

I had my notes 25

And my  prognostics.

COMPASS

You read  almanacs

And study ’em to some purpose, I believe?

PRACTICE

I do confess, I do believe and pray too,

According to the planets at  some times.

COMPASS

And do observe the  sign in making love? 30

PRACTICE

As in  phlebotomy.

COMPASS

And choose your mistress

By the  good days, and leave her by the bad?

PRACTICE

 I do, and I do not.

COMPASS

[Aside] A little more

Would fetch all his astonomy from  Allestree.

PRACTICE

I tell you, Master Compass, as my friend, 35

And  under seal, I cast mine eye long since

Upo’ the other wench, My Lady’s woman,

 Another manner of piece for handsomeness

Than is the niece – but that is  sub sigillo,

And as I give it you in hope o’your aid 40

And  counsel in the business.

COMPASS

You need counsel?

The only famous counsel o’the kingdom

And in all courts? That is a  jeer, in faith,

Worthy your name and your profession too,

Sharp Master Practice.

PRACTICE

No, upo’ my law, 45

As I am a  bencher and now  double reader,

I meant in  mere simplicity of request.

COMPASS

 If you meant so. Th’affairs are now  perplexed

And full of trouble; give’em breath and  settling.

I’ll do my best. But in mean time do you 50

Prepare the parson. [Aside]   I am glad to know

This, for myself liked the young maid before,

And loved her too. – Ha’ you a  licence?

PRACTICE

No,

But I can fetch one  straight.

COMPASS

Do, do, and mind

The  parson’s pint t’engage   him in the business: 55

A  knitting cup there must be.

PRACTICE

I shall do it.  [Exit.]

4.3   [Enter] BIAS [and] INTEREST.

BIAS

[To Interest] ’Tis an affront from you, sir. You here brought me

Unto My Lady’s, and to woo a wife,

Which since is proved a  cracked commodity.

She hath  broke bulk too soon.

INTEREST

No fault of mine,

If she be cracked in pieces or  broke round. 5

It was my sister’s fault, that owns the house

Where she hath got her  clap,  makes all this  noise.

I keep her portion safe; that is not scattered.

The  moneys rattle not, nor are they thrown

To make a  muss yet ’mong the  gamesome suitors. 10

COMPASS

Can you endure  that flout,  close Master Bias,

And have been so  bred in the politics?

The injury is done you, and by  him only;

He lent you  impressed money, and  upbraids it;

 Furnished you for the wooing, and now   waives you. 15

BIAS

That makes me to  expostulate the wrong

So with him, and resent it as I do.

COMPASS

But  do it home, then.

BIAS

Sir, my lord shall know it.

COMPASS

And all the lords o’the court too.

BIAS

What a  moth

You are, Sir Interest!

INTEREST

Wherein, I entreat you, 20

Sweet Master Bias?

COMPASS

To draw in young statesmen

And  heirs of policy into the noose

Of an infamous matrimony.

BIAS

Yes,

Infamous,  quasi in communem famam;

 And matrimony, quasi, matter of money. 25

COMPASS

Learnedly urged, my cunning Master Bias.

BIAS

With his  lewd,  known, and prostituted niece.

INTEREST

 My known and prostitute! How you mistake,

And run upon a false ground, Master Bias!

 Your lords will do me right. Now she is prostitute 30

And that I know it – please you understand me –

I mean to keep the portion in my hands

And pay no moneys.

COMPASS

Mark you that,  Don Bias?

And you shall still remain in bonds to  him

 For wooing furniture and  impressed charges. 35

INTEREST

Good Master Compass, for the sums he has had

Of me, I do acquit him. They are his own.

Here before you I do release him.

COMPASS

Good!

BIAS

Oh, sir!

COMPASS

[To Bias]  ’Slid, take it. I do witness it:

 He cannot hurl away his money better. 40

INTEREST

 He shall get so much, sir, by my acquaintance,

To be my friend. And now report to his lords

As I deserve no otherwise.

COMPASS

But well;

And I will witness it and  to the value:

Four hundred is the price, if I mistake not, 45

Of  your true friend in court.  Take hands, you ha’ bought him,

And bought him cheap.

[Bias and Interest shake hands.]

BIAS

I am His Worship’s servant.

COMPASS

[Aside] And you his slave, Sir Moth. Sealed and delivered.

Ha’ you not studied the court  compliment?

 [Exeunt Interest and Bias.]

Here are a pair of humours reconciled now, 50

That money  held at distance; or their  thoughts,

Baser than money.

4.4   [Enter] POLISH [and Nurse] KEEP.

POLISH

[To Keep]  Out,  thou caitiff witch!

Bawd, beggar,  gypsy! Anything indeed

But honest woman!

KEEP

What you please, Dame Polish,

My Lady’s  stroker.

COMPASS

[Aside] What is here to do?

The gossips  out!

POLISH

Thou art a traitor to me, 5

An  Eve, the  apple, and the serpent too:

A  viper that hast  eat a passage through me,

Through mine own bowels, by thy  recklessness.

COMPASS

[Aside] What  frantic fit is this? I’ll step aside

And hearken to it.

 [He hides.]

POLISH

Did I trust thee, wretch, 10

With such a secret of that consequence,

Did so concern me and my child, our livelihood

And reputation? And hast thou undone us?

By thy  connivance,  nodding in a corner,

And suffering her  be got with child so basely? 15

Sleepy unlucky  hag! Thou  bird of night

And all  mischance to me!

KEEP

 Good lady empress!

Had I the keeping of your daughter’s  clicket

In charge? Was that committed to my trust?

COMPASS

[Aside] Her daughter?

POLISH

Softly, devil, not so  loud. 20

You’d ha’ the house hear and be witness, would you?

KEEP

Let all the world be witness. Afore I’ll

Endure the tyranny of such a tongue –

And such a pride –

POLISH

What will you do?

KEEP

 Tell truth

And shame the  she-man-devil in puffed sleeves! 25

Run any hazard by revealing all

Unto My Lady how you changed the cradles

And changed the children in ’em!

POLISH

Not so  high!

KEEP

Calling your daughter  Pleasance there  ‘Placentia’,

And my true mistress by the name of  ‘Pleasance’. 30

COMPASS

[Aside] A  horrid secret,  this – worth the  discovery!

POLISH

And must you be thus loud?

KEEP

I will be louder,

And cry it through the house, through every room,

And every  office of the laundry-maids,

Till it be borne hot to My Lady’s ears. 35

Ere I will live in such a slavery,

I’ll do away myself.

POLISH

Didst thou not swear

To keep it secret? And upon what book?

I do remember now:  The Practice of Piety.

KEEP

It was a practice of impiety 40

 Out of your wicked forge, I know it now,

My conscience tells me. First, against the infants,

To rob them o’their names and their true parents;

 T’abuse the neighbourhood, keep them in error;

But  most My Lady. She has the main wrong, 45

And I will let her know it instantly.

 Repentance, if it be true, ne’er comes too late.  [Exit.]

POLISH

What have I done?  Conjured a spirit up

I sha’ not lay again? Drawn on a danger

And ruin on myself thus, by provoking 50

A  peevish fool  whom nothing will pray of

Or satisfy, I fear? Her patience stirred

Is turned to  fury. I have run my  bark

On a  sweet rock by mine own  arts and trust,

And must get off again, or dash to pieces! 55[Exit.]

COMPASS

This was a business worth the listening after.

4.5   [Enter] PLEASANCE.

PLEASANCE

Oh, Master Compass, did you see my mother?

Mistress Placentia, My Lady’s niece,

Is newly brought to bed o’the  bravest  boy!

Will you go see it?

COMPASS

First, I’ll know the father,

Ere I approach these hazards.

PLEASANCE

Mistress Midwife 5

Has promised to  find out a father for it,

If there be need.

COMPASS

She may the safelier  do’t

 By virtue of her place. But, pretty Pleasance,

I have a news for you I think will please you.

PLEASANCE

What is’t, Master Compass?

COMPASS

Stay, you must 10

 Deserve it ere you know it. Where’s My Lady?

PLEASANCE

Retired unto her chamber and shut up.

COMPASS

She hears o’none o’this yet? Well, do you

Command the coach and  fit yourself to  travel

A little way with me.

PLEASANCE

Whither, for God’s  sake? 15

COMPASS

Where I’ll  entreat you not to your loss, believe it.

If you dare trust yourself.

PLEASANCE

With you the world o’er!

COMPASS

The news will well requite the pains, I assure you,

And i’this tumult you will not be missed.

Command the coach. It is an  instant business, 20

 Wou’ not be done without you.  [Exit Pleasance.]

[Enter PALATE.]

Parson Palate,

Most opportunely  met. Step to my chambers:

I’ll come to you presently. There is a friend

Or two will  entertain  you.  [Exit Palate.]

 [Enter] PRACTICE [with a licence].

Master Practice,

Ha’ you the licence? 25

4.6    

PRACTICE

 Here it is.

COMPASS

Let’s see it.

Your name’s not in’t.

PRACTICE

I’ll fill that presently;

It has the seal, which is  the main, and  registered.

The clerk knows me and trusts me.

COMPASS

Ha’ you the parson?

PRACTICE

They say he’s here. He  ’pointed to come hither. 5

COMPASS

I would not have him seen here for a world,

To breed  suspicion. Do you intercept him

And prevent that. But  take your licence with you

And fill in the blank, or leave it here with me.

I’ll do it for you.  Stay you  with us at his  church 10

Behind the  Old Exchange; we’ll come i’th’coach

And meet you there within  this quarter at least.

PRACTICE

I am much bound unto you, Master Compass.

You have all the law and parts of Squire Practice

Forever at your use. I’ll tell you news too: 15

Sir, your  reversion’s fall’n. Thinwit’s dead,

Surveyor of the  projects general.

COMPASS

When died he?

PRACTICE

E’en this morning. I received it

From  a right hand.

COMPASS

Conceal it, Master Practice,

And  mind the main affair you are  in hand with.20 [Exit Practice.]

[Enter] PLEASANCE.

PLEASANCE

The coach is ready, sir.

COMPASS

’Tis well, fair Pleasance,

Though now we shall not use it. Bid the coachman

Drive to the parish church and stay about there

Till Master Practice come to him and employ him.  [Exit Pleasance.]

I have a licence now which must  have entry 25

Before my lawyer’s.

[Enter] PALATE.

 Noble Parson Palate,

Thou shalt be a mark advanced: here’s a piece,

And do  a feat for me.

PALATE

What, Master Compass?

COMPASS

But  run the words of matrimony over

My head and Mistress Pleasance’s in my chamber. 30

There’s Captain Ironside to be a witness,

And here’s a licence  to secure thee. Parson!

What do you  stick at?

PALATE

It is afternoon, sir,

Directly against the  canon of the church.

You know it, Master Compass, and beside, 35

I am engaged unto our worshipful friend,

The learnèd Master Practice, in that business.

COMPASS

Come on,  engage yourself.  Who shall be able

To say you married us but i’the morning,

The most canonical minute o’the day, 40

If you affirm it? That’s a  spiced excuse,

And shows you have set the common law before

Any  profession else of love or friendship.

[Enter PLEASANCE.]

Come, Mistress Pleasance, we cannot prevail

With th’ rigid parson here, but, sir, I’ll keep you 45

Locked in my lodging  till’t be done elsewhere,

And  under fear of Ironside.

PALATE

Do you hear, sir?

COMPASS

No, no, it matters not.

PALATE

Can you think, sir,

I would deny you anything?  Not to loss

Of  both my livings. I will do it for you. 50

Ha’ you a wedding ring?

COMPASS

Ay, and a  posy:

 Annulus hic nobis quod scit uterque dabit.

PALATE

Good!

‘This ring will give you what you both desire.’

I’ll make the whole house chant it, and the parish.

COMPASS

Why, well said, parson. Now to you my news 55

That  comprehend my reasons, Mistress Pleasance.  [Exeunt.]

4.7   [Enter Mother] CHAIR, NEEDLE, POLISH, [and Nurse] KEEP.

CHAIR

Go, get a nurse, procure her at what rate

You can, and out o’th’house with  it, son Needle.

It is a  bad commodity.

NEEDLE

Good mother,

I know it, but  the best would now be made on’t.

CHAIR

And shall.  [Exit Needle.]

You should not fret so, Mistress Polish, 5

Nor you, Dame Keep.  My daughter shall do well,

When she has ta’en my  caudle. I ha’ known

Twenty such  breaches  pieced up and made whole

Without a  bum of noise. You two fall out?

And tear up one  another?

POLISH

Blessèd woman! 10

  Blest be the  peacemaker.

KEEP

The  pease-dresser!

I’ll hear no peace from  her. I have been wronged;

So has My Lady, My good Lady’s Worship,

And I will right her, hoping she’ll right me.

POLISH

Good gentle Keep, I pray thee, Mistress Nurse, 15

Pardon my passion, I  was misadvised.

Be thou yet better by  this grave sage woman,

Who is the  mother of matrons and great persons

And knows the world.

KEEP

I do confess, she knows

Something – and I know something –

POLISH

Put your somethings 20

Together then.

CHAIR

Ay, here’s a chance fallen out

 You cannot help; less can  this gentlewoman.

I can and will for both. First, I have sent

 By-chop away; the cause gone, the  fame ceaseth.

Then, by my caudle and my  cullis, I set 25

 My daughter on her feet about the house here.

She’s young and must  stir somewhat for necessity;

Her youth will  bear it out. She shall pretend

T’have had a  fit o’the mother: there is all.

If you have but a  secretary laundress 30

To  blanch the linen. Take the former  counsels

Into you; keep them safe i’your own breasts,

And  make your  market of ’em at the highest.

Will you go  peach and  cry yourself a fool

At  Grannam’s Cross? Be laughed at and despised? 35

Betray a purpose which the  deputy

Of a double ward or  scarce his alderman

With twelve of the wisest  questmen could find out,

Employed by the authority of the city?

Come, come, be friends, and keep these women-matters, 40

 Smock-secrets, to ourselves in our own  verge.

We shall mar all if once we ope the mysteries

O’the  tiring house and tell what’s done within:

 No theatres are more  cheated with  appearances,

Or these  shop-lights,   than th’age ’s, and folk in them, 45

That seem most  curious.

POLISH

Breath of an  oracle!

You shall be my dear mother, wisest woman

That ever  tipped her tongue with point of reasons

To  turn her hearers! Mistress Keep, relent!   [She kneels.]

I did abuse thee, I confess  to penance, 50

And on my knees ask thee forgiveness.

CHAIR

Rise.

She doth begin to melt, I see it –

KEEP

Nothing

Grieved me so much as when you called me ‘bawd’.

‘Witch’ did not trouble me, nor ‘gypsy’, no,

Nor ‘beggar’. But a bawd was  such a name! 55

CHAIR

No more  rehearsals.

[Polish rises.]

Repetitions

Make things worse. The more we stir  – you

Know the  proverb, and it signifies a – stink.

What’s done and dead, let it be buried.

New hours will fit fresh  handles to new thoughts. 60 [Exeunt.]

4.8   [Enter] INTEREST, with his FOOTBOY.

INTEREST

Run to the church, sirrah. Get all the drunkards

To ring the bells and jangle them for joy.

My niece hath brought an heir unto the house,

A  lusty boy.  [Exit Footboy.]

Where’s my sister Loadstone?

[Enter] LADY [LOADSTONE.]

Asleep  at afternoons! It is not wholesome, 5

Against all rules of physic, lady sister.

The little doctor will not like it. Our niece

Is new delivered of a  chopping child

Can call the father by the name already,

If it but  ope the mouth round. Master Compass, 10

He is the man, they say,  fame gives it out,

 Hath done that act of  honour to our house

And friendship, to   pump out a son and heir

That shall  inherit nothing, surely nothing,

From me at least.

  [Enter] COMPASS.

I come t’invite Your Ladyship 15

To be a  witness. I will be your  partner

And give it a  horn spoon and a  treen dish,

Bastard and beggar’s  badges with a blanket

For  dame the doxy to  march round the circuit

 With bag and baggage.

COMPASS

Thou malicious knight, 20

 Envious Sir Moth, that  eats on that which feeds thee

And  frets  her goodness that  sustains thy being!

What company of mankind would  own  thy brotherhood,

 But as thou hast a  title to her blood

Whom thy ill-nature hath chose out t’ insult on 25

And  vex thus for an accident in her house

As if it were her crime, good innocent  lady!

 Thou show’st thyself a true  corroding vermin,

Such as thou art.

INTEREST

Why, gentle Master Compass?

Because I wish you joy of your young son 30

 And heir to the house  you ha’ sent us?

COMPASS

I ha’ sent you?

 I know not what I shall do. [Calling]  Come in, friends.

To them [enter] IRONSIDE, [Sir DIAPHANOUS,] PALATE,  [BIAS, and] PLEASANCE.

Madam, I pray you be pleased to trust yourself

Unto our company.

LADY

I did that  too late,

Which brought on this calamity upon me 35

With all the infamy I hear. Your soldier,

That swaggering guest –

COMPASS

Who is returned here to you

Your vowed friend and servant, comes to sup with you –

So we do all – and’ll prove he hath deserved

 That special respect and favour from you 40

As not your fortunes with yourself  to boot,

Cast on a featherbed and spread o’th’sheets

Under a  brace of your best  Persian carpets,

Were scarce a price to thank his happy merit.

INTEREST

What impudence is this? Can you endure 45

To hear it, sister?

COMPASS

Yes, and you shall hear it,

 Who will endure it worse. What deserves he

In your opinion, madam, or weighed judgement,

That – things thus hanging as they do in doubt,

Suspended and suspected, all involved 50

And wrapped in error – can resolve the knot;

 Redintegrate the fame, first, of your house;

Restore Your Ladyship’s quiet;  render then

Your niece a virgin and  unvitiated;

And make all plain and perfect, as it was, 55

A  practice to betray you and your name?

INTEREST

He speaks impossibilities.

COMPASS

[Drawing Ironside forward] Here he stands

Whose fortune hath done this, and you must thank him;

To what you call his swaggering, we owe all this.

And that it may have credit with you, madam, 60

Here is your niece, whom I have married – witness

These gentlemen, the knight, captain, and parson,

And this grave  politic tell-truth of the court.

LADY

What’s she that I call niece, then?

COMPASS

Polish’s  daughter.

Her mother,   Goody Polish, hath confessed it 65

To Grannam Keep, the nurse, how they did change

The children in their cradles.

LADY

To what purpose?

COMPASS

To get the portion, or some part of it,

[To Interest] Which you must now disburse entire to me, sir,

 If I but gain Her Ladyship’s consent. 70

LADY

I bid God give you joy, if this be true.

COMPASS

As true it is,  lady, lady, i’th’song.

The portion’s mine with interest, Sir Moth.

I will not  ’bate you a single harington

Of  interest upon interest. In mean time, 75

I do commit you to the guard of Ironside,

My brother here, Captain  Rudhudibras,

From whom I will expect you or your  ransom.

INTEREST

Sir, you must prove it and the  possibility,

Ere I believe it.

COMPASS

For the possibility, 80

I leave to trial. Truth shall speak itself.

 [Enter] PRACTICE.

Oh, Master Practice, did you meet the coach?

PRACTICE

Yes, sir, but empty.

COMPASS

Why, I sent it for you.

The business is dispatched here ere you come.

Come in, I’ll tell you how. You are a man 85

Will look for  satisfaction, and must have it.

ALL

So do we all, and long to hear the  right. [Exeunt.]

 CHORUS 4

DAMPLAY

Troth, I am one of those that  labour with the same longing, for it is

almost  puckered and pulled into that knot by your poet, which I cannot easily,

with all the strength of my imagination, untie.

BOY

Like enough, nor is it in your office to be troubled or  perplexed with it, but

to sit still and  expect. The more your imagination busies itself, the more it is 5

entangled, especially if (as I told in the beginning) you  happen on the wrong

end.

PROBEE

He hath said sufficient, Brother Damplay. Our  parts, that are the

spectators, or should hear a comedy, are to await the  process and  events of

things, as the poet presents them, not as we would  corruptly fashion them. 10

We come here to behold plays and censure them as they are made and  fitted

for us,  not to   beslaver our own thoughts with censorious spittle tempering

the poet’s clay  as we were to mould every scene anew. That were a mere  plastic

or potter’s ambition, most unbecoming the name of a gentleman. No, let us

mark and not lose the business  on foot by talking. Follow the right  thread, or 15

find it.

DAMPLAY

Why, here his play might have ended, if he would ha’ let it, and have

spared us the vexation of a fifth act yet to come, which everyone here knows

the issue of already, or may in part conjecture.

BOY

That conjecture is a kind of  figure-flinging, or throwing the dice, for a 20

meaning  was never in the poet’s purpose, perhaps. Stay and see his last act, his

 catastrophe, how he will perplex that, or spring some fresh  cheat, to entertain the

spectators with a  convenient delight, till some unexpected and new encounter

break out to rectify all and make good the conclusion.

PROBEE

Which, ending here, would have shown dull, flat, and  unpointed, 25

without any shape or sharpness, Brother Damplay.

DAMPLAY

Well, let us expect then. And  wit be with us, o’ the poet’s part.

5.1  [ Enter] NEEDLE [and] ITEM.

NEEDLE

Troth, Master Item, here’s a house divided

And quartered into parts by your doctor’s  engine:

 He’s cast out such  aspersions on My Lady’s

Niece here, of having had a child, as hardly

Will be wiped off, I doubt.

ITEM

Why, is’t not true? 5

NEEDLE

True! Did you think it?

ITEM

Was she not in labour?

The midwife sent for?

NEEDLE

 There’s your error now!

 You ha’  drunk o’the same water.

ITEM

I believed it,

And  gave it out too.

NEEDLE

More you wronged the party.

She had no such thing about her, innocent creature! 10

ITEM

 What had she then?

NEEDLE

 Only a fit o’the mother!

 They burnt old shoes,  goose-feathers,  asafoetida,

A few horn shavings, with a bone or two,

And she is well again, about the house –

ITEM

Is’t possible?

NEEDLE

See it, and then report it. 15

ITEM

Our doctor’s  urinal-judgement is half  cracked, then.

NEEDLE

 Cracked i’the case most hugely, with My Lady

And sad Sir Moth, her brother, who is now

 Under a cloud a little.

ITEM

Of what? Disgrace?

NEEDLE

He is  committed to Rudhudibras, 20

The Captain Ironside, upon displeasure

From Master Compass, but it will blow off.

ITEM

The doctor shall reverse  this instantly

And set all right again, if you’ll assist

But in a   toy, Squire Needle,  comes i’my  noddle now. 25

NEEDLE

Good – Needle and Noddle! What may’t be? I long for’t.

ITEM

Why, but to go to bed: feign a  distemper

Of  walking i’your sleep, or talking in’t

A little  idly, but so much as  on’t

The doctor may have ground to  raise a cure 30

For’s reputation.

NEEDLE

Anything to serve

The  worship o’the man I love and honour.  [Exeunt.]

5.2  [ Enter] POLISH [and] PLEASANCE [as just meeting].

POLISH

Oh!  Gi’ you joy,  Mademoiselle Compass!

You are his  whirlpool now,  all-to-be-married

 Against your mother’s leave and without counsel!

 He’s  fished fair and caught a frog, I fear it.

What fortune ha’ you to bring him  in dower? 5

You can tell stories now: you know a world

Of secrets to  discover.

PLEASANCE

I know nothing

But what is told me, nor can I discover

Anything.

POLISH

No, you shall not, I’ll  take order.

Go, get you in there. It is  Ember Week! 10

 I’ll keep you fasting from his flesh awhile.  [Exit Pleasance.]

[Enter Mother] CHAIR, PLACENTIA, [and Nurse] KEEP.

CHAIR

 See who’s here?  She’s been with My Lady,

Who kissed her,  all-to-kissed her twice or thrice.

KEEP

And called her niece again, and   viewed her linen.

POLISH

You ha’ done a  miracle, Mother Chair.

CHAIR

Not I, 15

My caudle has done it. Thank my caudle heartily.

POLISH

It shall be thanked, and you too, wisest Mother;

You shall have a new, brave,  four-pound beaver hat,

Set with enamelled studs, as mine is here,

And a  right pair of crystal spectacles, 20

 Crystal o’th’rock, thou mighty mother of dames,

Hung in an ivory case at a gold belt,

And silver bells to jingle as you  pace

Before your  fifty daughters in procession

 To church, or from the church.

CHAIR

Thanks, Mistress Polish. 25

KEEP

She does deserve as many pensions

As there be  pieces in a –  maidenhead,

Were I a prince to give ’em.

POLISH

Come, sweet  charge,

 You shall present yourself about the house.

Be confident and bear up: you shall be seen. 30 [Exeunt.]

5.3  [ Enter] COMPASS [and] IRONSIDE, [disputing with] PRACTICE.

COMPASS

 What? I can make you amends, my learnèd counsel,

And satisfy a greater  injury

To  chafèd Master Practice. Who would think

That you could be thus testy?

IRONSIDE

A grave  head,

Giv’n over to the study of our laws! 5

COMPASS

And the prime honours of the commonwealth.

IRONSIDE

And you to  mind a wife.

COMPASS

What should you do

With such a toy as a wife that might distract you

Or hinder you i’your course?

IRONSIDE

He shall not think on’t.

COMPASS

I will  make over to you my  possession 10

Of that same  place  is fallen, you know,  to  satisfy:

 Surveyor of the projects general.

IRONSIDE

And that’s an office you know how to stir in.

COMPASS

And make your profits of.

IRONSIDE

Which are, indeed,

The  ends of a  gowned man: show your activity 15

And how you are built for business.

PRACTICE

I accept it

As a   possession, be’t but a reversion.

COMPASS

You first told me ’twas a possession.

PRACTICE

 Ay,

I told you that I heard so.

IRONSIDE

 All is one.

He’ll make reversion a possession quickly. 20

COMPASS

But I must have a  general release from you.

PRACTICE

Do  one; I’ll do the other.

COMPASS

It’s a match

 Before my brother Ironside.

PRACTICE

 ’Tis done.

COMPASS

We two are  reconciled, then.

IRONSIDE

To a lawyer

That can make use of a place,  any half title 25

Is better than a wife.

COMPASS

And will save charges

Of coaches,  velvet gowns, and  cut-work smocks.

IRONSIDE

He is to  occupy an office wholly.

COMPASS

True. I must talk with you  nearer, Master Practice,

About recovery o’my  wife’s portion, 30

What way I were best to take.

PRACTICE

The plainest way.

COMPASS

What’s that, for plainness?

PRACTICE

Sue him at common law;

Arrest him on an action of  choke-bail,

Five hundred thousand pound: it will affright him

And all his  sureties. You can prove your marriage?

COMPASS

Yes. 35

We’ll talk of it within, and hear My Lady. [Exeunt.]

5.4  [ Enter] INTEREST [and] LADY [LOADSTONE].

INTEREST

 I’m sure the    brogue o’the house went all that way:

She was with child, and Master Compass  got it.

LADY

Why, that, you see, is manifestly false.

 He’s married the other, our true niece, he says.

He would not woo ’em both; he is not such 5

A stallion to  leap all.  Again, no child

Appears that I can find with all my search

And strictest way of inquiry I have made

Through all my  family. A fit o’the mother,

The women say she had, which the midwife cured 10

With burning bones and feathers. Here’s the doctor.

 Enter Doctor [RUT].

INTEREST

Oh, noble doctor, did not you and your Item

Tell me our niece was in labour?

RUT

If I did,

What follows?

INTEREST

And that  Mother Midnight

Was sent for?

RUT

So she was, and is i’the house still. 15

INTEREST

But here has a  noise been  since, she was delivered

Of a brave boy, and Master Compass’s  getting.

RUT

I know no rattle of gossips, nor their noises.

I hope you take not me for a  pimp errant

To deal in  smock affairs? Where’s the patient, 20

The  infirm man I was sent for, Squire Needle?

LADY

Is Needle sick?

RUT

My ’pothecary tells me

He is in danger.

Enter TIM [ITEM].

How is’t, Tim? Where is he?

ITEM

I cannot hold him down. He’s up and walks,

And talks in his  perfect sleep with his eyes shut, 25

As  sensibly  as he were broad awake.

INTEREST

 See, here he comes. He’s fast asleep: observe him.

RUT

 He’ll tell us wonders. – What do these women here?

5.5 [ Enter] NEEDLE, [ half undressed, followed by] POLISH, CHAIR, KEEP, [and] PLACENTIA.

RUT

 Hunting a man half naked? You are  fine beagles!

You’d have his  doucets.

NEEDLE

I ha’ linen  breeks on.

RUT

He hears, but he sees nothing.

NEEDLE

Yes, I see

Who hides the treasure yonder.

INTEREST

Ha? What treasure?

RUT

If you ask questions,  he wakes  presently, 5

And then you’ll hear no more till his next fit.

NEEDLE

And whom she hides it for.

RUT

[Aside to Interest] Do you mark, sir? List.

NEEDLE

A fine she-spirit it is, an  Indian  magpie.

She was an alderman’s widow, and fell in love

With our Sir Moth, My Lady’s brother.

RUT

[Aside to Interest]  Hear you? 10

NEEDLE

And she has hid an alderman’s estate,

  Dropped through her bill in little holes i’the garden,

And scrapes earth over’em, where none can spy

But I, who see all by the  glow-worm’s light

That creeps before.

POLISH

I knew the gentlewoman, 15

Alderman  Parrot’s widow, a fine speaker

As any was i’the  clothing or the  bevy.

She did become her  scarlet and black velvet,

Her green and purple –

RUT

Save thy  colours, rainbow –

[To Needle] Or she will  run thee over, and all thy  lights. 20

POLISH

She dwelt in  Dolittle Lane atop o’the hill there

I’the round cage, was  after  Sir Chime Squirrel’s.

She would eat naught but  almonds, I assure you.

RUT

Would thou hadst a dose of pills, a double dose

O’the best  purge, to make thee turn  tale tother way! 25

[  Exit Needle, followed by Chair, Keep, and Placentia.]

POLISH

You are a foul-mouthed, purging, absurd doctor.

I tell you true, and I did long to tell it you.

You ha’ spread a scandal i’My Lady’s house here

On  her sweet niece you never can take off

With all your purges or your  plaster of oaths, 30

Though you  distil your ‘damn me’ drop by drop

I’your defence.  That she hath had a child,

Here she doth  spit upon thee and defy thee,

Or I do’t for her.

RUT

[To Lady Loadstone] Madam, pray you  bind her

To her behaviour. Tie your gossip up, 35

Or send her unto  Bedlam.

POLISH

Go thou thither,

That better hast deserved it, shame of doctors!

Where could she be delivered? By what  charm

Restored to her strength so soon? Who is the father?

Or where the infant? Ask your  oracle 40

That walks and talks in his sleep.

RUT

Where is he? Gone?

You ha’ lost a fortune listening to her, to her  tabor.

Good madam, lock her up.

LADY

 You must give losers

Their leave to speak, good doctor.

RUT

Follow  his footing

Before he get to his bed. This rest is lost else. 45

[ Exeunt Rut, Interest, and Item.]

5.6  [ Enter] COMPASS, PRACTICE, [and] IRONSIDE.

COMPASS

[To Polish] Where is my wife? What ha’ you done with my wife,

 Gossip o’the  counsels?

POLISH

I, sweet Master Compass?

I honour you and your wife.

COMPASS

Well, do so still.

I will not call you mother, though, but Polish.

Good Gossip Polish, where ha’ you hid my wife? 5

POLISH

I hide your wife?

COMPASS

Or she’s run away.

LADY

That would make all  suspected, sir, afresh.

Come, we will find her, if she be i’the house.

POLISH

Why should I hide your wife, good Master Compass?

COMPASS

I know no cause but that you are   Goody Polish, 10

That’s good at malice, good at mischief, all

That can perplex or trouble a business  throughly.

POLISH

You may say what you will: you’re Master Compass,

And carry a large  sweep, sir, i’your circle.

LADY

I’ll sweep all corners, gossip, to  spring  this, 15

If’t be above  ground. I will  have her cried

By the  common crier through all the  ward,

But I will find her.

IRONSIDE

It will be an act

Worthy your justice, madam.

PRACTICE

And become

The  integrity and worship of her name. 20 [Exeunt.]

5.7  [ Enter] RUT [and] INTEREST.

RUT

’Tis such a  fly, this gossip: with her buzz,

She  blows on everything in every place!

INTEREST

A  busy woman is a fearful  grievance!

 Will  he not sleep again?

RUT

Yes, instantly,

As soon as he is warm. It is the nature 5

Of the disease, and all these cold dry fumes

That are melancholic, to work at first

Slow and insensibly in their  ascent,

Till being got  up; and then distilling down

Upo’ the  brain, they have a  pricking quality 10

That breeds this restless  rest (which we, the  sons

Of physic, call a walking in the  sleep)

And  telling mysteries that  must be  heard –

Softly, with art,  as we were  sewing pillows

Under the  patients’  elbows –  else they’d fly 15

Into a frenzy, run into the woods,

Where there are noises, huntings, shoutings,  hallowings,

Amidst the  brakes and  furzes, over bridges,

Fall into  waters, scratch their  flesh, sometimes

Drop down a precipice, and there be lost. 20

 Enter ITEM.

How now! What does   he?

ITEM

He is up again,

And ’gins to talk.

INTEREST

O’the former matter, Item?

ITEM

The treasure and the lady: that’s his  argument.

INTEREST

Oh, me,  happy man! He cannot  off it.

I shall know all, then.

RUT

With what  appetite 25

Our own desires delude us! Hear you, Tim?

Let no man interrupt us.

ITEM

Sir Diaphanous

And Master Bias, his court  friends, desire

To kiss his niece’s hands and  gratulate

The firm recovery of her good fame 30

And honour –

INTEREST

Good. Say to’em, Master Item,

My niece  is  on My Lady’s side: they’ll find her there.

I pray to be but spared for half an hour.

I’ll see ’em presently.

RUT

Do, put ’em off, Tim,

And tell ’em the importance of the business. 35

[ Enter] NEEDLE.

Here, he is come!  Sooth, and have all out of him!

NEEDLE

How do you,  ladybird? So hard at work still?

What’s that you say? Do you bid me walk, sweet bird?

And tell our knight? I will. How?  Walk, knave, walk?

I think  you’re angry with me, Pol. Fine Pol! 40

Pol’s a fine bird! O fine lady Pol!

 Almond for parrot. Parrot’s a  brave bird.

Three hundred thousand pieces ha’ you stuck

 Edge-long into the ground within the garden?

 O bounteous bird!

INTEREST

And  me, most happy creature! 45

RUT

Smother your joy!

NEEDLE

How? And dropped twice so many –

INTEREST

Ha! Where?

RUT

Contain yourself.

NEEDLE

 I’the old well?

INTEREST

I cannot. I am a man of flesh and blood.

Who can contain himself to hear the ghost

Of a dead lady do such works as these? 50

And a city lady too, o’the  straight waist?

RUT

He’s gone.

NEEDLE

I will go  try the truth of it.  [Exit.]

RUT

Follow him, Tim. See what he  does, if he bring you

  Assay of it now.  [Exit Item.]

INTEREST

I’ll say he’s a  rare fellow,

And has a rare disease.

RUT

And I will work 55

As rare a cure upon him.

INTEREST

How, good doctor?

RUT

When he hath uttered all that you would know of him,

I’ll  cleanse him with a pill as small as a  pease

And stop his mouth, for there his  issue lies

Between the muscles o’the tongue.

[ Enter ITEM.]

INTEREST

He’s come. 60

RUT

What did he, Item?

ITEM

The first step he stepped

Into the garden, he pulled these five pieces

Up  in a finger’s breadth one of another.

The  dirt sticks on’em still.

INTEREST

I know enough.

Doctor, proceed with your cure. I’ll make thee famous, 65

Famous among the sons of the physicians,

 Machaon, Podalirius,  Aesculapius.

Thou shalt have a  golden beard as well as he had,

And thy Tim Item here have one of silver,

A  livery beard. And all thy ’pothecaries 70

 Belong to thee. Where’s Squire Needle? Gone?

ITEM

He’s pricked away, now he has done the work.

RUT

Prepare his pill and gi’it him afore supper.

INTEREST

I’ll send for a dozen o’labourers tomorrow

To turn the surface o’the garden up. 75

RUT

In  mould? Bruise every clod?

INTEREST

And have all sifted –

For I’ll not lose a piece o’the bird’s bounty –

And take an inventory of all.

RUT

And then

I would go down into the well –

INTEREST

Myself.

No trusting other hands. Six hundred thousand 80

 To the first three, nine hundred thousand pound –

RUT

’Twill purchase the whole  bench of  aldermanity

 Stripped to their shirts.

INTEREST

There never did accrue

So great a gift to man, and from a lady

I never saw but once. Now I remember, 85

We met at   Merchant Taylors Hall at dinner

In Threadneedle  Street.

RUT

Which was a  sign Squire Needle

Should have the threading of this thread.

INTEREST

’Tis true.

I shall love parrots better while I know him.

RUT

 I’d have her statue cut now in white marble. 90

INTEREST

And have it painted in most  orient colours.

RUT

That’s right! All city statues must be  painted;

Else they be worth nought i’their  subtle judgements.

5.8  [ Enter] BIAS.

INTEREST

My truest friend in court, dear Master Bias!

You hear o’the recovery of our niece

In fame and  credit?

BIAS

Yes, I have been with her

And gratulated to her, but I am sorry

To find the author o’the foul aspersion 5

Here i’your company, this  insolent doctor.

INTEREST

You do mistake him.  He is clear got off on’t.

A gossip’s jealousy first gave the hint.

He  drives another way now, as I would have him.

 He’s a rare man, the doctor, in his way. 10

He’s done the noblest cure here i’the house

On a poor squire, my sister’s tailor, Needle,

That talked in’s sleep, would  walk to St John’s Wood

And Waltham Forest, scape by all the ponds

And pits i’the way, run over  two-inch bridges 15

With his eyes  fast and i’the dead of night!

I’ll ha’ you better acquainted with him. Doctor,

Here is my dear, dear, dearest friend in court,

Wise, powerful Master Bias. Pray you salute

Each other, not as strangers, but true friends. 20

RUT

This is the gentleman you brought today

A suitor to your niece?

INTEREST

Yes.

RUT

You were

Agreed, I heard; the  writings drawn between you?

INTEREST

And  sealed.

RUT

What broke you off?

INTEREST

This rumour of her,

Was it  not, Master Bias?

BIAS

Which I find 25

 Now false and therefore come to make amends

I’the first place. I  stand to the old conditions.

RUT

Faith, give ’em him, Sir Moth,  whate’er they were.

You have a brave occasion now to cross

The  flaunting Master Compass, who pretends 30

Right to the portion by th’other  entail.

INTEREST

And claims it. You do hear he’s married?

BIAS

We hear his wife is run away from him,

Within. She is not to be found i’the house,

With all the hue and cry is made for her 35

Through every room: the  larders ha’ been searched,

The bake-houses, and  bolting- tub, the ovens,

Wash-house and brew-house, nay, the very  furnace,

And yet she is not heard of.

INTEREST

 Be she ne’er heard of,

The safety of Great Britain lies not on’t. 40

You are content with the ten thousand pound,

 Defalking the four hundred  garnish money?

That’s the condition here, afore the doctor,

And your demand, friend Bias?

BIAS

It is, Sir Moth.

 Enter PALATE.

RUT

Here comes the parson, then, shall make all sure. 45

INTEREST

Go you with my friend Bias, Parson Palate,

Unto my niece.  Assure them, we are agreed.

PALATE

And Mistress Compass too is found within.

INTEREST

Where was she hid?

PALATE

In an  old  bottle-house

Where they scraped  trenchers; there her mother had thrust her. 50

RUT

You shall have time, sir, to triumph on  him

When this fine feat is done, and his Rud Ironside.  [Exeunt.]

5.9  [ Enter] COMPASS, PLEASANCE, LADY [loadstone], IRONSIDE, PRACTICE, POLISH, [Mother] CHAIR, [and Nurse] KEEP,  etc.

COMPASS

Was ever any gentlewoman used

So barbarously by a malicious gossip,

 Pretending to be mother to her too?

POLISH

Pretending! Sir, I am her mother, and challenge

A right and  power for what I have done.

COMPASS

Out,  hag! 5

Thou that hast  put all nature off, and woman;

For  sordid gain betrayed the trust committed

Unto thee by the dead,  as from the living;

Changed the poor innocent infants in their cradles;

Defrauded them o’their parents; changed their names, 10

Calling Placentia ‘Pleasance’, Pleasance ‘Placentia’ –

POLISH

How knows he this?

COMPASS

 Abused the neighbourhood,

But most this lady; didst enforce an oath

To this poor woman [Pointing to Keep] on a pious book

To  keep close thy  impiety.

POLISH

[To Keep] Ha’ you told this? 15

KEEP

I told it? No, he knows it, and much more,

As he’s a  cunning-man.

POLISH

A cunning fool,

 If that be all.

COMPASS

But now to your true daughter,

That had the child and is the proper Pleasance,

We must have an account of that too,  gossip. 20

POLISH

 This’s like all the rest of Master Compass.

5.10    Enter to them running RUT.

RUT

Help, help, for charity! Sir Moth Interest

Is fallen into the well.

LADY

Where? Where?

RUT

I’the garden.

  [Exit Lady Loadstone, followed by Ironside.]

A rope to save his life!

COMPASS

How came he there?

RUT

He thought to take possession of a fortune,

There  newly dropped him, and the old chain broke, 5

And down fell he i’the bucket.

COMPASS

Is it deep?

RUT

We cannot tell. A rope – help with a rope!

 Enter [DIAPHANOUS], IRONSIDE, ITEM, NEEDLE, and INTEREST, [wet].

DIAPHANOUS

 He is got out again. The knight is saved.

IRONSIDE

A little  soused i’the water. Needle saved him.

ITEM

 The water saved him. ’Twas a fair escape. 10

NEEDLE

[To Interest] Ha’ you no hurt?

INTEREST

A little wet.

NEEDLE

That’s nothing.

RUT

I wished you  stay, sir, till tomorrow, and told you

It was no lucky hour; since six  o’clock

All stars were  retrograde.

 [Enter] LADY [LOADSTONE].

LADY

 I’the name

Of fate or folly, how came you i’the bucket? 15

INTEREST

That is a  quaere  of another time, sister.

The doctor will resolve you – who hath done

The admirablest cure upon your Needle!

Gi’ me thy hand, good Needle. Thou cam’st  timely.

Take off my hood and coat. And let me  shake 20

Myself a little. I have a  world of business.

Where is my nephew Bias? And his  wife?

 [Enter] BIAS, PLACENTIA, [and] PALATE.

Who  bids God gi’ ’em joy? Here they both stand

As sure affianced as the parson or words

Can tie ’em.

RUT

We all wish ’em joy and happiness. 25

DIAPHANOUS

I saw the contract and can witness it.

INTEREST

He shall receive  ten thousand pounds tomorrow.

You  looked for’t, Compass, or a greater sum,

But ’tis disposed of, this, another way.

I have but one niece, verily, Compass. 30

COMPASS

I’ll find another.

  [Enter] VARLET.

Varlet, do your office.

VARLET

I do arrest your body, Sir Moth Interest,

In the king’s name,  at suit of Master Compass

And Dame Placentia, his wife. The action’s  entered,

Five hundred thousand pound.

INTEREST

Hear you this, sister? 35

And hath your house the ears to hear it too?

And to resound the affront?

LADY

I cannot stop

The laws or hinder justice. I can be

Your bail, if’t may be taken.

COMPASS

With the  captain’s,

I ask no better.

RUT

Here are better men 40

Will give their bail.

COMPASS

But yours will not be taken,

Worshipful doctor. You are good security

For a suit of clothes to th’  tailor that dares trust you,

But not for such a sum as is this action. –

Varlet, you know my mind.

VARLET

[To Interest] You must to prison, sir, 45

Unless you can find bail the creditor  likes.

INTEREST

I would  fain find it, if you’d show me where.

DIAPHANOUS

It is a terrible action, more indeed

Than many a man is worth. And is called  fright-bail.

IRONSIDE

Faith, I will bail him at mine own  apperil. 50

Varlet, begone.  [Exit Varlet.]

I’ll  once ha’ the reputation

To be security for such a sum.

Bear up, Sir Moth.

RUT

[Aside to Interest] He is not  worth the buckles

About his belt, and yet this Ironside  clashes.

INTEREST

[Aside to Rut] Peace, lest he hear you, doctor. We’ll make use of

him. 55

[To Ironside] What doth your brother Compass, Captain Ironside,

Demand of us by way of challenge thus?

IRONSIDE

Your niece’s portion, in the right of his wife.

INTEREST

I have assured one portion to one niece,

And have no more t’account for that I know of. 60

What I may do in  charity – if my sister

Will  bid an offering for her maid and him

As a  benevolence to ’em after supper –

I’ll  spit into the basin and entreat

My friends to do the like.

COMPASS

Spit out thy gall 65

And heart, thou viper; I  will now no mercy,

No pity of thee, thy false niece, and Needle.

[To Placentia] Bring forth your child, or I  appeal you of murder,

 You, and this gossip here, and Mother Chair.

CHAIR

The gentleman’s  fallen mad!

  Pleasance steps out.

PLEASANCE

No, Mistress Midwife. 70

I saw the child, and you did give it me

And put it i’ my arms; by this  ill token,

You  wished me such another, and it cried.

PRACTICE

 The law is plain: if it were heard to cry,

And you produce it not, he may indict 75

All that conceal’t of  felony and murder.

COMPASS

And I will take the boldness, sir, to do it,

Beginning with Sir Moth here and his doctor.

DIAPHANOUS

Good faith, this same is like to  turn a business.

PALATE

And a  shrewd business, marry. They all  start at’t. 80

COMPASS

I ha’ the  right thread now, and I will keep it.

You, Goody Keep, confess the truth to My Lady,

 The truth, the whole truth, nothing but the truth.

POLISH

I scorn to be  prevented of my  glories.

I plotted the deceit, and I will  own it. 85

Love to my child and  lucre of the portion

Provoked me; wherein, though th’ event hath failed

In part, I will make use of the best side.

This  [Indicating Placentia] is my daughter, and she hath had a child

This day –  unto her shame, I now  profess it – 90

By this  mere  false-stick Squire Needle, but

Since this  wise knight hath thought it good to  change

The foolish father of it by  assuring

Her to his dear friend, Master Bias, and him

Again to her by  clapping of him on 95

With his free promise of ten thousand pound,

Afore so many witnesses –

DIAPHANOUS

Whereof I

Am one.

PALATE

And I another.

POLISH

I should be  unnatural

To my own flesh and blood, would I not thank him.

[To Interest] I thank you, sir, and I have reason for it. 100

For here your true niece stands, fine Mistress Compass –

I’ll tell you truth, you have deserved it from me –

To  whom you are by bond engaged to  pay

The sixteen thousand pound which is her portion,

Due to her husband on her marriage-day. 105

I speak the  truth, and nothing but the truth.

IRONSIDE

You’ll pay it now, Sir Moth, with interest?

You see the truth breaks out on every side of you.

INTEREST

Into what nets of  coz’nage am I cast

On every side! Each thread is grown a  noose, 110

A very mesh. I have run myself into

A double  brake of paying twice the money.

BIAS

You shall be released of paying me a penny,

With these conditions.

POLISH

Will you leave her, then?

BIAS

Yes, and the sum twice told, ere take a wife 115

To  pick out Monsieur Needle’s  basting threads.

COMPASS

Gossip, you are paid. Though he be a fit nature,

Worthy to have a  whore justly put on him,

He is not bad enough to take your daughter

On such a  cheat. [To Interest] Will you  yet pay the portion? 120

INTEREST

What will you  ’bate?

COMPASS

 No penny the law gives.

INTEREST

Yes,  Bias’s money.

COMPASS

What? Your friend in court?

 I will not rob you of him, nor the  purchase,

Nor your dear doctor  here. Stand  all together –

 Birds of a nature all, and of a feather. 125

LADY

Well, we are all now  reconciled to truth.

There rests yet a  gratuity from me

To be conferred upon this gentleman [Indicating Ironside]

Who, as my  nephew Compass says, was cause,

First of th’offence, but since of all th’  amends: 130

The quarrel caused th’affright; that fright brought on

The  travail, which made peace; the peace drew on

This new discovery, which endeth all

In reconcilement.

COMPASS

When the portion

Is  tendered and received.

INTEREST

Well, you must have it, 135

 As good at first as last.

LADY

 ’Tis well said, brother.

And I, if this good captain will accept me,

 Give him myself, endow him with my estate,

And make him lord of me and all my fortunes.

He that hath saved my  honour, though by chance, 140

I’ll really  study his and how to thank him.

IRONSIDE

And I embrace you, lady, and your goodness,

And vow to quit all thought of war hereafter,

Save what is fought  under your colours, madam.

PALATE

More work then for the parson! I shall  cap 145

The Loadstone with an Ironside, I see.

IRONSIDE

And take in these, the  forlorn couple, with us,

Needle and his  thread, whose portion I will think on,

As being a business waiting on my bounty.

Thus I do take possession of you, madam, 150

My true  magnetic mistress and My Lady.  [Exeunt.]

 THE END

 CHORUS 5,  changed into an epilogue to the King.

[ The BOY steps forward, away from Probee and Damplay.]

Well, gentlemen, I now must,  under seal

And th’author’s charge,  waive you and make my  appeal

To the supremest power, My Lord the King,

Who best can judge of what we humbly bring.

He knows  our weakness and the poet’s faults, 5

Where  he doth stand upright, go firm, or  halts,

And  he will doom him.  To which  voice he stands,

And  prefers that  ’fore all the people’s hands.

Title-page 10–11 I am . . . Magnete ‘Rocks are stirred by a passion of their own; iron is obedient to thy blandishments’ (Claudian, ‘The Magnet’, ed. Platnauer, 1922, lines 56–7). The poem supposes that Mars, god of war, is an iron statue, and that Venus, goddess of love, is a magnet or loadstone, embraced by the iron. Each substance is modified by the other: the iron caps and protects the power of the loadstone, whose attractiveness is consequently intensified. The coupling of the two gives the pair a dynamic that neither can have alone.
6 reconcil’d] in some copies of F2 the apostrophe is very faint
11 Claud. de Magnet.] not in some copies
12 London . . . XL] underlined in some copies
13 M.CD.XL] printer’s error for M.DC.XL.
The Persons that Act Names are in italic font and descriptions in roman in F2
1 LOADSTONE Magnet; figuratively, something that attracts. According to Ridley, A Short Treatise of Magnetical Bodies, 1613, 63, the loadstone’s effect on metals is to refresh, invigorate, and animate with polar and directory virtue ‘as though they had a new life of quickness infused into them’. For its function in the mariner’s compass, see Ostovich (1994).
1 magnetic Jonson used ‘magnetic’ in its figurative sense in his ‘Katherine Ogle’ (6.315–16) to describe the lady as powerfully exemplary, mathematically perfect in her roles as woman, wife, parent, and friend, virtuous and ‘magnetic in the force’ (19) of her personality, or extraordinary ability to attract and inspire others. Like Lady Loadstone, she also controlled considerable wealth in her own right. For further comment on Lady Ogle and the Cavendish circle, see Introduction. The word seems to have caught on: John Cleveland used it in ‘The Anti-Platonic’, first published in 1656, to describe the power of the ‘magnetic girl’ and the soldier (‘that man of iron’) who succumbs to her astonishing authority. See Cleveland’s Poems, ed. Morris and Withington, 54–6 (thanks to Tony Gibbs for this connection).
2 POLISH Worldly refinement, including eloquence of speech and finished perfection in adornment (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
2 gossip (1) one’s child’s godparent; loosely, familiar acquaintance or friend; (2) derogatively, woman of trifling character who delights in idle chitchat (OED, 3).
2 she-parasite female dependant who repays the hospitality of a wealthy patron with obsequious flattery; toady.
3 PLACENTIA Pleasure (Lat.). The term placenta (from Gr. and Lat., uterine ‘cake’ that nourishes the foetus) was not in use in English until the end of the seventeenth century, and would not have indicated pregnancy to an early modern audience. However, Basque fishermen in the sixteenth century named what later became the first capital of Newfoundland ‘Isle de Plazienca’, meaning a harbour within a womb of hills; the French called it ‘Ille de plaisance’ in the map by Nicholas Vallard (sometimes spelled Kallard or Kellard), 1547 (Encyclopedia of Newfoundland and Labrador, 4.318); by 1583, Hakluyt referred to it as Placentia (Hayes, 1583), as well as Plesance (Parkhurst, 1578), and early seventeenth-century maps also referred either to Placentia (Guy 1611 in Purchas’s re-issue of Hakluyt) or Plaisance (Vasseur 1601); for details, see Seary (1971), 38, 258–9. Although for agricultural cultivation the land was not so pleasant, Placentia Bay, aside from its physical beauty, was remarkable for its fertile fishery, its substantial beach for curing cod, and its capacity to shelter many vessels in the harbour; the area was one of the busiest settlements of the seventeenth century. The name, in other words, echoes the play’s mercantile and maritime issues, associated with Lady Loadstone’s family. It also invokes wordplay on fishmongers and their wares (pimps and whores) and on cod (phallus), as in ‘codpiece’.
3 [STEEL] For this name, the context is vital; cf. Und. 15.77–8: ‘For t’other pound of sweetmeats he shall feel / That pays, or what he will. The dame is steel’ (i.e. morally insensitive); unlike the lady in Milton’s Comus, 421, ‘clad in complete steel’ (protected by her chastity).
3 placentia] This edn; M rs. Placentia F2
4 PLEASANCE (1) Pleasure; (2) the action or disposition of pleasing. An Englished form of Placentia; see 3n. above.
5 KEEP Care or charge, having responsibility for tending, watching, or preserving.
6 MOTHER Respectful address to a midwife; usually, address to any elderly woman of lower class (OED, 4a). Licensed midwives were older middle-class women, past child-bearing age themselves, obtaining their licences at 45 to 65 years of age after several years of apprenticeship, and continuing to practise and train others for a much longer period (Evenden, 2000, 111).
6 CHAIR Named by association with the birthing-chair (OED, 13) or midwife’s stool (see 4.1.3n.); also, by association with la chair, flesh (Fr.), the proper companion to the world and the devil in morality plays. The French implications include a possible satiric reference to Louise Bourgeois, the royal midwife both for Marie de Medici and for her daughter Henrietta Maria, queen consort of Charles I, the first of whose children was born in 1630.
7 COMPASS (1) Measure, proper proportion or scope; (2) ingenuity, crafty or skilful designing; (3) mathematical instrument for describing circles; specifically, the mariner’s compass. The character is loosely based on Charles Cavendish, brother of Jonson’s patron; see Introduction.
7 mathematic (1) of mathematical sciences; (2) pertaining to the study not only of mathematics, but also of connections within the sciences, including navigation, astrology, astonomy, cosmography, philosophy, geography, music, and all learning, metaphysical or applied: ‘A term applied to such arts as treat only of quantities imaginarily abstracted from bodies’ (Bullokar, 1616, LEME). See Introduction. The design and collection of mathematical instruments was an early modern passion: see Informations, 457–8 and notes, describing Jonson’s personal impresa, ‘a compass with one foot in centre, the other broken; the word, deest quod duceret orbem’. Compass in the play has no broken foot, however, and can perform perfect service as a guide. See Epact for images and commentaries on early mathematical instruments.
8 IRONSIDE Name given to a man of great bravery; also, ironclad protection for more unstable substances, such as the iron caps attached to poles of the magnet in a mariner’s compass, tripling the power of the loadstone and the needle by concentrating the lines of force (Ridley, Short Treatise 1613, 64, and Barlow, Magnetical Advertisements, 1616, 28). The character is loosely based on Sir Charles Cavendish of Welbeck, the father of Jonson’s patron (see Introduction). The bravery of English soldiers and mariners was proverbial; see Peecke, Three to One, 1625, the author’s own experience as an Englishman, captured and mistreated by Spaniards, who was allowed to fight a trial by combat, won, and was rewarded with his freedom and a pension from Spain. See above, magnetic, 1 n., ‘that man of iron’ attracted to the ‘magnetic girl’.
9 PALATE (1) Sense of taste; an appetite for or means of testing pleasure; (2) derogatively, ‘A lickerish or hungry palate; one whose stomach is always ready, whose appetite ever awake’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME). In the anonymous Paquil’s Mad-cap . .  (1626), on the character of parsons, the poet warns: ‘tell them truly that divinity / With worldly love hath no affinity’.
10 RUT (1) Periodic sexual excitement, usually in male deer and some other four-legged animals; Florio (LEME) associates the term with ‘caterwauling’, lechery, and pride; (2) rue or herb of grace (ruta, Lat.), used medically for hot and dry humours (Turner, 1548, LEME); (3) ‘rut of the sea’ (Smith, An Accidence; or, The Path-way to Experience, 1626, 17), or roaring of waves breaking on the shore (OED, n.3); associated with a ‘ruttier; a directory for the knowledge, or finding out of courses, whether by sea or land’, and hence any repository of experience or skill, often with implications of knavery and deceit (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
10 physician ‘If he see you himself, his presence is the worst visitation: for if he cannot heal your sickness, he will be sure to help it’, according to the character of ‘A mere dull physician’ in Blount, Micro-Cosmography (1628), 9. For Jonson’s stated scepticism about physicians, see Epigr. 13, 41.
11 TIM ITEM ‘Tim’ is a term of abuse. Cf. Alch., 4.7.45: ‘Then you are an otter, and a shad, a whit, / A very tim’, all of which suggest a maritime or fishy slipperiness. ‘Item’, Lat. for ‘also’, was used to introduce details of a list (such as a prescription). Altogether, the name ‘Tim Item’ sounds singsong and trivial, ‘tim-ee-tim’.
12 diaphanous] F2 (Diaph)
12 DIAPHANOUS Transparent, easily seen through.
12 SILKWORM Suggests an expensively dressed caterpillar or grub, a kind of parasite needing a cocoon of money. Cf. ‘On Court-Worm’, Epigr. 15.1–2. Like the character of the gallant in Blount, Micro-Cosmography, 1628, D9v, the name suggests ‘one that was born and shaped for his clothes; and if Adam had not fallen, had lived to no purpose . . . His first care is his dress, the next his body, and in the uniting of these two lies his soul and its faculties.’
13 PRACTICE (1) Exercising the profession of law and following legal procedures; (2) scheming in an underhand way, or participating in a negotiation or conspiracy for evil purposes, especially to trick some dupe. Florio, Minsheu, and Cockeram (LEME) associate the term with persuasive discourse. Ward notes in The Happiness of Practice, 1627, 15: ‘Some say, the study of the law is cragged, that if the gain of practice did not sweeten it, few would plot upon Plowden’, that is, few would follow the famous legal scholar in chossing law as a profession. The practice of law promises sweet financial profit unlike the practice of piety, which sweetens the soul.
13 a lawyer] F2 (ALawyer)
14 MOTH Parasite or vermin, with the same larval sense as ‘Silkworm’; figuratively, something that eats away, here at an estate, gradually and silently (OED, 1b).
14 moth] F2 (Moath)
14 interest Miserliness and usury; ‘money given above the principal sum for the love of it’ (Florio, 1598, LEME). The prejudice against taking profit on loans is obvious in MV.
14 bawd] F2 (baud) (state 2); band (state 1)
15 BIAS (1) Swaying influence for particular ends; from the term in the game of bowls to describe the impetus or spin given to a bowl to make it run obliquely; (2) humour of blaming, taunting, or reproaching (Florio, 1598, LEME); (3) in geometry, a diagonal line drawn ‘awry, crooking, obliquely, aslope, with a compass’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
15 vi-politic vice-politician, or assistant to the official in power; a manipulative underling.
16 lady’s] F2 (Ladies)
17 FOOTBOY Page.
20 probee Derived from probo, ȓ are (Lat.) to approve; but also suggesting ‘probity’, moral integrity and conscientiousness, which Jonson wants in a good audience.
22 boy . .  Stage-manager, in modern parlance; book-holder or prompter, who, in his close relationship with the playwright, may echo Jonson’s earlier apprentice, Richard Brome (c.1590–1652 or –53), described in the Ind. to Bart. Fair (6) as lurking ‘behind the arras’ to make sure the performance proceeds as written.
22 TRYGUST Tester of taste.
21 damplay Representing the bad audience that damns the play without hearing it fairly or understanding it. For the connection between Damplay and Inigo Jones, see Ind. 60–5 and notes.
22 ] appears at the top of the page in F2, before ‘The Persons that act.’
0 ] F2 (THE / INDVCTION; / OR, / CHORUS. // Two Gentlemen entering upon the Stage. / Mr. Probee and Mr. Damplay. / A Boy of the house, / meets them.)
1 What  . . . lack A shopkeeper’s cry (H&S cite East. Ho!, 1.1.54). Jonson is establishing the metaphor of theatre as a shop in which literary or dramatic ‘notions’ are for sale.
1 fancies] F2 (Phansies)
1–2 fancies . . . definitions List of ‘notions’ in this theatrical shop: fancies, or imaginative trifles, not always clearly distinguished from ‘fantasies’, exercises of poetic imagination conventionally regarded as accompanied by belief in the reality of what is imagined (OED, 4); figures, such as similes, metaphors, types; humours: ‘Humour’ is defined in EMO, Ind. 86–96, as an obsessive overmastering quality that causes all one’s emotions and energies ‘In their confluxions all to run one way’, thus distorting and unbalancing the personality; the term applies to characters thus distorted, like Sir Moth Interest, by one humour; or to ‘manners of men’, as at 79 below; characters, literary character sketches, sometimes satirical, like Jonson’s Characters preceding the text of EMO, or Compass’s character sketches of Parson Palate and Doctor Rut below, 1.2.14ff. and 35ff.; ideas, archetypes or models, as opposed to particular persons; definitions, authoritative pronouncements on current questions, such as Doctor Rut’s assertions about Placentia’s physical condition, or Compass’s determinations in the play’s finale.
2 lords] F2 (lords,)
4 prompt boy i.e. prompter.
4 poetic shop playhouse. Jonson referred to all his plays as poems.
5 ] prose Wh; two verse lines in F2, breaking at Masters, / Sirrah.
7 poetaccios, poetasters, poetitos Derogatory terms for bad writers, all Jonson’s coinages. Poetaster is the term that caught on: ‘a smattrer in Poetrie’ (Florio, 1611); ‘a counterfeit Poet’ (Bullokar, 1616,); ‘a witlesse Poet’ (Cockeram, 1623); ‘an unlearned fellow, that pesters the world with idle vanities’ (Blount, 1656) (for more, see LEME). Poetito may be modelled on pettitoes, pig’s trotters, used contemptuously (OED, 1b).
8 haberdashers dealers in small articles pertaining to dress, such as thread, tape, ribbons, etc.
9 poet o’the day writer of today’s play.
10 he . . . here Jonson had been largely bedridden since about 1627–8, partly paralysed owing to a stroke.
10 dominion control, management.
12 Probee expresses confidence in the Boy’s intelligence and theatrical experience.
13 tie . . . you make us indebted or obliged to you.
14 public persons agents representing the community’s welfare in a professional or official position of influence; cf. delegates (102 below).
16 but . . . hope! Expressing fear that political readings might be imposed on the play. Jonson had been questioned about possible sedition in Dogs, East. Ho!, and Epicene, and expressed resentment of ‘any state-decipherer, or politic picklock of the scene’ in Bart. Fair (Ind., 103).
21 venison side left side, punning on ‘hart’ and ‘heart’ (H&S).
22 left . . . right The Boy plays on sinister, Lat., left, the side of the devil, and prefers the right as the side of the angels in iconographic tradition.
23 So they are They are in the right, meaning the people whom Probee and Damplay represent are the fashionable, educated class whose money supports the theatre.
23 faeces or grounds groundlings; the usually lower-class spectators who stand on the ground in the pit of the theatre; literally, sediment or refuse (Alch., 2.3.63).
23 faeces] Wh; Faces F2
24 caves and wedges From caveae (seats, Plautus, Amphitruo, Prol., 66) and cunei (wedge-shaped seat-divisions, Virgil, Aeneid, 5.46) in Roman amphitheatres (Happé, elaborating on H&S).
24 six-penny Cheapest price for a seat; Damplay tells us that he usually pays eighteen pence or two shillings (Chorus 2, 47). The ‘articles of agreement’ in Bart. Fair, first performed at the Hope playhouse, give an unusually high price range of sixpence to half a crown (Ind. 71–2).
24 mechanics manual labourers, like the ‘rude mechanicals’ of MND.
25 braver more expensively and fashionably dressed, as in the plush-and-velvet mentioned next.
25 Plush-and-velvet Cf. ‘Ode to Himself’ (appended to The New Inn, pp. 310–13 above ): ‘the alms-basket of wit’ is enough to feed ‘Brave plush-and-velvet men’ who care only for their ‘stage clothes’ (30–3) and fail to understand or appreciate the play itself.
26 stick . . . eminences cluster around the playhouse showing off their high social or official positions. Apparently delighted, Damplay describes such fashionable people as decorative and prominent elements of the audience, equivalent to architectural ornaments (‘eminences’) on the supporting timbers of the theatre itself.
27 at pawn used as collateral for debt. Punning on peacock (OED, Pawn n. 3), whose gorgeous plumage made it the sign of elaborate dress.
27–8 these . . . these people The emphasis suggests sneering at the people Damplay represents, those with more clothes than brains. So too ‘gay gallant people’ (40–1).
32–3 Populo . . . fabulas That whatever plays they make should please the people (Terence, Andria, Prol., 3).
33–4 third form junior grade or class of pupils at school, ranked according to level of proficiency or year of study; possibly derived from the ‘form’ or bench on which such pupils were seated.
34 Westminster The school where Jonson acquired Latin and Greek, with Camden as his schoolmaster.
37 mean inferior, poor in quality.
40 venture] F2 (venter)
42 ingenuity nobility of mind, as well as social rank.
44 pass our words vouch.
44 brace pair.
46 tender . . . book secure the transaction with your promises, as though signing a promissory note in an account book. As part of the shopkeeping metaphor with which the scene began, the Boy is ready to ‘venture’ (40) his good merchandise – the play – if Probee and Damplay promise to guarantee (or ‘undertake for them’, 41) the audience’s good response as purchasers. The question dares them to ensure compliance or place a bet on it, although the idea of ‘book’ as a betting register was not current until the nineteenth century, according to OED.
47 parts good natural abilities, intelligence.
50 securities pledges or guarantees of good behaviour in the performance of some undertaking (OED, 8a).
50–1 Whence . . . yourselves Where are you from? What’s your address?
52 brothers younger brothers, hence not entitled to inherit.
54 fellows When used contemptuously, as here, base companions, persons of no esteem or worth.
54 squire Many early modern printers added Esquire to a writer’s name on the title-page in an effort to present him as a gentleman, and worth reading. H&S cite volumes by Samuel Daniel, Michael Drayton, and Richard Brathwaite, but of these men, only Drayton had the right to the title.
55 good reliable, financially and morally sound.
57 attractive (1) pleasing; (2) drawing like a magnet.
58 A magnete Probee’s Latin, ‘from a magnet’, confirms the meaning of ‘attractive’, 57.
59 magnus . . . magnum In declining the Lat. adjective ‘big’, Damplay illustrates his ignorance, underscored by the Boy’s subsequent sarcasm on ‘magnitude’ (60), and setting up the oblique attack on Inigo Jones, also inept in Latin.
59 magnum!] F2 state 2; (magnum.) state 1
60 This gentleman Probably Damplay, whose error arouses the Boy’s scorn either in a remark directed to Probee about his companion’s ignorance, or in an aside to the offstage audience. Possibly, the Boy may be attempting to correct Damplay by referring to Probee as the gentleman with the ‘true’ translation, but the dash indicates interruption; Damplay simply carries on with his own interpretation without acknowledging the Boy’s remark.
61 portal elaborate entrance (as to a magnificent building); here, a grandiose equivalent to ‘entry’. Jonson may be commenting on Jones’s extravagant set designs for court presentations, as opposed to the simplicity of the bare stage in public theatres.
61, 62 Vitruvius The Roman architect admired by Inigo Jones, and associated with Jonson’s continuing attack on Jones, his former partner in masque design. Jonson satirized him in Tub as Vitruvius Hoop, and in Love’s Welcome as Colonel Vitruvius; see also ‘Expostulation’, 7–8, on his habit of ‘overbearing us / With mistook names out of Vitruvius’ (6.376).
62 In foro In open or public space, in the street, or perhaps on a bare stage, another implied critique of Jones’s complex designs. The Boy goes on to defend the practice as derived from ‘true comedy’, referring to Gr. and Lat. comedy for which the scaena was always a public street. See also EMO, Ind., 231ff., and New Inn, 2.6.184.
62 In] F2 (In)
63–4 made . . . report Offstage action, in classical tradition, was narrated on the stage to save time or to avoid presenting unseemly action onstage; cf. ‘Many things may be told which cannot be showed’, Sidney, Apology, ed. Shepherd, 1965, 135 (Happé). Jonson does likewise in Act 3, reporting the dinner-party violence rather than showing it.
68, 70 your people The Boy continues his sarcasm aimed at ‘these people’, the fashionable gallants of line 28, for whom Damplay is an agent, and who are unlikely to have educated views on theatre.
68 decorum the classical laws of propriety for the development of dramatic situation.
70 leave permission. That is, most audiences know their own shortcomings in relation to stage theory, and do not object to the Boy’s speaking for them.
71 Reconciled,] F2 (reconcil’d?)
72 too — if] F2 (too: if)
80 close . . . circle Jonson sees Mag. Lady as his last comedy, possibly predicting his own death, and deliberately connects it with the best of his comedy over his long career, to show consistency of purpose and thought. The circle itself is part of Jonson’s mathematical conceit, also illustrated in the motto of his emblem, Deest quod duceret orbem: that is lacking which should complete the circle, Informations, 578–9. See Introduction.
80 fancied] F2 (phant’sied)
81 bountiful housekeeper one who keeps a bountiful house (OED, 2).
86–7 reconciliation . . . churches harmony between the Roman Catholic and Protestant churches. See Introduction.
91 speed succeed.
92 lost Like Terence, who complained in Andria’s prologue that he usually had to defend himself against charges of slander for his prologues. This is a recurrent feature of Jonson’s prologues and inductions from Volp. to New Inn.
93 gentle well-born, belonging to families of high position (cf. 25 above). Jonson spelled it ‘gentile’, but the meanings of ‘tribal’ or ‘pagan’ do not seem to fit the classist contrast between ‘gentle’ and ‘vulgar’ (cf. ‘mechanics’, 24) or ‘common’ (94).
93 gentle] G; gentile F2
94 vulgar censure ordinary uncultured opinions; plebeian views, usually negative: ‘reproof, reprehension (that includes a punishment)’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
95 super-please please over and above expectation, a unique Jonson coinage based on Lat. formations (OED’s only example is under Super-).
95 judicious spectators Jonson spent much of his career defining the ideal audience: ‘Attentive auditors, / Such as will join their profit with their pleasure, / And come to feed their understanding parts’ (EMO, Ind. 199–201).
101 my standing where I stand.
101–2 Fly . . . mark In falconry, set a hawk in flight to hover over the location of the prey before stooping for the kill. Cf. Mortimer, 1.1.11–12.
102 censure criticize, whether favourably or adversely (but see 94n.). Cf. Asper’s challenge to his onstage ‘censors’ to ‘Observe what I present, and liberally / Speak your opinions upon every scene / As it shall pass the view of these spectators’ (EMO, Ind., 152–5).
102 it freely — so] F2 (it; freely. So,)
102 so provided that.
103 series sequence of discourse and thought.
103 pucker contract into wrinkles or bulges, thus distorting the material.
104 dictamen authoritative statement (cf. New Inn, 3.1.52)
105 author’s] F2 (Authors)
105 skein of silk This simile establishes a series of embroidery analogies, begun with the ‘comic thread’ (78 above) and continuing through Chorus 4, 15; 5.10.81 and 109–11.
105–6 right end Cf. 5.10.81.
106 bottom Clew or nucleus on which to wind thread (OED, 15); hence Bottom the weaver in MND.
106 card Instrument with iron teeth used to comb fibres (OED, n.1 2).
108 elf-lock Tangled mass, usually of hair, and superstitiously assumed to be created by elves. According to Mercutio, Queen Mab ‘bakes the elf-locks in foul sluttish hairs, / Which, once untangled, much misfortune bodes’ (Rom., 1.4.88–9).
108 shears . . . candle Either the tangle must be cut out, burned out, or greased with wax in an attempt to separate the strands.
111 these . . . persons] parenthetical in F2
111 prime persons first actors to appear on stage.
113 interpreter One who expounds on or explicates the text, like a chorus (cf. Ham., 3.2.256), to make sure that the audience understands the point. Although the Boy claims that the playwright hated the practice, Jonson uses his onstage audiences as chorus-figures, beginning with EMO’s Grex, and other explicit variations in Bart. Fair’s Induction and Staple’s Intermeans.
114 Ergo Therefore (Lat.).
0 SD] Happé; Compasse, Ironside. F2
1.1 1 The whole of Act 1 takes place in the street, in foro (Ind. 62), in front of Lady Loadstone’s house.
1 brother Compass later qualifies ‘brother’ with ‘adopted’ at 2.6.145, which merely indicates a choice of close association or ‘best friend’, not formal familial bonds. The men share the experiences of Oxford (72–4), military service (20), and ongoing companionship (44 below).
2 hard close, near.
4 one will one who will.
6 carriage social conduct, deportment.
6 constitution disposition, temperament (OED, 5b).
7 diametral (1) directly opposed in nature or result (OED, Diametrical 2b); ‘oppositively, right overthwart, clean cross, in opposition to, or one over against another’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); (2) ‘diameter-like’ (Florio, 1611, LEME), and therefore capable of measurement or analysis by a compass. The word is part of a string of mathematical terms frequent especially in Compass’s speech as the sign of his superior intelligence.
10 sufferance toleration.
11 dissolution termination or breaking up of an assembly.
13 magisterial (1) masterful, authoritative (OED, 2); (2) in alchemy, quintessentially perfect, from magisterium, the philosopher’s stone (OED, 4).
14 success result.
16 multiply acquaintance meet so many people (arithmetical, as at 17 and 26 below).
17 At . . . cost At the price of ruining my dinner.
17 take off o’ diminish, subtract from.
18 bind . . . observance force me to respond with at least a minimum of politeness.
21 some some of.
24 as that.
25–6 Whether pleasant companions or not, all groups of people, separated by their opinions, split into factions. Cf. Discoveries, 1033–4.
25 Goodfellows (1) Mad wags or rakehells; (2) noddies, ninnies, and idiots; (3) gossiping neighbours (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
27–8 Whoever the people are, they all share the same opinion (‘agree’) regarding their dealings (‘usage’, ‘handling’) with Compass, who has proved a ‘fair’ or objective appraiser of situations and behaviour, bringing people together co-operatively within his circle.
30 men and manners A favourite collocation; cf. among others Epigr. 125.2 and Volp., 2.1.10.
31 ungoverned uncontrolled in disposition or action, unmanageable (see 43 below).
32 censure criticism, judgement; see Ind. 102 and note.
33 distaste annoyance or disgust.
34 subject . . . mirth target of their levity.
36 distrust i’ doubt, or question.
37 bear . . . wit acquit myself honourably by going along with someone else’s opinion or action.
38 bring off rescue (OED, 19b).
40 being away if I am absent.
41 You won’t have to exert yourself to protect me from my social gaffes with your cleverness or diplomacy (‘wit-work’).
41 You’re] F2 (You’are)
41 less wit-work] F2 (lesse-wit-worke)
44 caract estimate of a person’s good qualities (OED, Character 13); grain to calculate measurement: ‘sign or token, or the smallest weight of gold or such’ (Thomas, 1550, LEME).
45 reckon calculate (mathematical term).
46–51 The syntax is tangled, but Compass’s argument is that Ironside knows how timorous animals react when under attack by a fierce fox threatening destruction, or how cowards react when faced with a powerful swordsman: terrified, they run to the nearest hiding-spot. That will be the day’s sport, basically a game of fox and rabbits, to see how long it takes the fierce Ironside to terrify the cowards into retreat.
47 fox blade of a sword (Bart. Fair, 2.6.48), or a kind of sword (OED, Ⅱ, +6). Compass wants Ironside to play the part of the fox in the game subsequently described in animal terms.
48 Unkennelled Forced out of its hole or lair; metaphorically, the sword drawn out of its scabbard.
48 choleric having choler as its predominant humour, supposed to cause bad temper; thus, angry, or wrathful.
48 ghastly causing terror, dreadful; ‘belonging to a night-spirit, goblin or masker, haggish’ (Blount, 1656, LEME).
49 comminatory vengeful; threatening, denunciatory.
54 Saint George Intrepid dragon-slayer and patron saint of England.
56 Set to Set upon, attack.
56 swinge beat.
57 virtue of manly strength awakened by.
61 over-entreat] F2 (over intreat)
61 over-entreat persuade with unusual urgency, in spite of judgement or inclination; prevail upon by pleading an extreme case.
62 plot scheme or plan to accomplish a particular purpose; also used of measuring distance and direction with a mariner’s compass.
62 the rest the other dinner guests.
63–8 If you are willing to tolerate abuse of yourself or your army career, it would ultimately help me win a significant victory, without hurting you at all in the long run.
64 sliding passing, incidental (H&S).
64 reprehension condemnation, reproof, reprimand.
65 glanced at struck upon obliquely, without getting the full impact of the blow (used of a weapon).
66 terms] F2 state 2; terme state 1
67 main mighty, forceful.
67 o’the by as a result, as a matter of minor or secondary importance; wordplay to contrast with main (OED, n. 1, 2b).
69–72 universal . . . acts In Ironside’s reading of Aristotle, universals do not exist in the concrete world, except as characteristic of particular actions and reactions which we can observe in many individuals. The universal is the general idea we draw from particular instances. The theory differs from Plato’s in that Aristotle does not accept that universals exist in a separate ideal world either. Ironside applies the theory to his own experience: generalizations (‘general words’, 77) do not affect his composure, but a particular insult (‘some smart stroke’, 78) causes him to react.
73 Oxford science Knowledge, generally as conceived and studied for the humanities degree at Oxford (primarily philosophy), not what we now mean by the natural, physical, or life sciences. See OED, 5a and c. See Introduction.
73 stays that stays.
75 passions feelings, emotions, or predilections.
77 profession military career. Generally praised, as in Poet. Apol. Dial., 123, and Epigr. 108.6.
79–82 Else . . . them Essentially, a version of playground wisdom: ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me’; cf. ‘Words are but wind’ (Dent, W833).
80 do but signify express only superficial meaning.
82 syntaxis syntax (Gr.), the aspect of grammar which deals with established usages of words in grammatical construction and the rules so derived; used jocularly here as the content of grammarians’ souls.
84 venerable youth Oxymoronic: respected by reason of age as well as high qualities of character and dignity of appearance (OED, 2), but applied ironically to a young man.
84 salute greet; see 88 below.
85 clerk cleric. Unlike Palate, Chaucer’s parson enjoys a life of poverty and holy dedication, and his learning defines him appositively as a clerk: ‘He was also a learned man, a clerk’ (Gen. Prol., 480ff.).
85 lady’s] F2 (Ladies)
86 cope silk vestment resembling a long semicircular cloak, worn by ecclesiastics in processions, at Vespers, and on other occasions. The ‘cope’/ ‘pope’ rhyme comes from Chaucer’s Friar, Gen. Prol., 261–2, and sets up the Chaucerian details in the description of Palate at 1.2.15ff. (Gifford).
87 SD] not in F2, but see 1.2.0 SD
88 clergy clergyman.
1.2 ] F2 (Act I. Scene II.)
1 0]no SD, Wilkes; Palate, Compasse, Ironside. F2
1.2 2 stays waits.
3 Steel Purified iron, but with greater hardness and elasticity (used for weapons, cutting tools, and needles). Proverbially, ‘true as steel’, whether of weapons or persons, implies ‘thoroughly trustworthy’ (OED, 1.2b). In the play’s magnetic metaphor, the compass needle, according to William Barlow’s Magnetical Advertisements (1616), is ‘the most admirable and useful instrument of the whole world’; its substance ‘ought to be pure steel, and not iron. For most assuredly steel will take at the least ten times more virtue than iron can do, but especially if it hath his right temper’ (66–7).
4 strikes the fire tempers steel on a blacksmith’s anvil by striking it and thus forcing heat into it. The analogy is to Placentia’s feeling the heat of sexual awakening, to be consummated in (tempered by) marriage.
5 Ripe . . . husband Mature enough to marry; translating from Virgil, Aeneid, 7.53 (H&S). In fact, although Placentia may have physically reached puberty, fourteen was usually considered (in social terms) too young to marry and cohabit; the legal age of consent for girls was variously indicated as ten or twelve, but consummation would have been deferred until after the onset of menstruation (in practice, around sixteen years of age). Renaissance law treatises note the age: see, for example, T.E., The Law’s Resolutions of Women’s Rights (1632). Stone (1979), 43, graphs the median age at which women married at about 20, and Gillis (1985), 111, suggests a slightly older age. Where heiresses were concerned, however, especially if orphaned, marriages were usually arranged early.
5 chimes.] Wh; chimes, F2
5 chimes rings out, like bells announcing the hour. The metaphor suggests Placentia’s excitement at reaching womanhood and anticipating sexual readiness for marriage.
7 ’Time It is time; the apostrophe indicates the omission.
8 round brisk, rapidly delivered or summed up as one would round up numbers; approximate (OED, 11, 7) rather than thorough (OED, 9), since the emphasis is on ‘haste’ and ‘quick dispatch’.
8 quick dispatch prompt or speedy settlement of an affair (OED, 5); speed, rapid progress (OED, 6b).
9 betimes in good time, before it is too late.
10 health] F2 state 2; health, state 1
10 SD] G; not in F2
11 put-off evasion or delay; perhaps, snub (Happé).
11 youth Cf. 1.1.84 n.
12 surreverently irreverently; with contempt; OED cites Jonson’s usage as an ironic variation on ‘sir-reverence’, meaning ‘with all due respect’; but that word could also mean ‘excrement’ (OED, 2). Cf. Tub, 3.5.43–4.
13 What call] F2 state 2; What? call state 1
14 character character sketch; see Ind. 2n.
15 prelate In Chaucer’s Gen. Prol., the monk is described as ‘a fair prelat’ (204) who preferred hunting to the holy life: ‘He yaf nought of that text a pulled hen / That saith that hunteres been nought holy men’ (177–8).
16 governs . . . dames Chaucer’s Friar was also ‘wel biloved and familier . . . with worthy wommen of the town’ (‘General Prol.’, 215–17).
16 appoints the cheer decides on the entertainment and provisions.
17 pricks writes down, or selects from a list by checking off names.
18 Chaucer’s Friar was a man of ‘dalliaunce’ who ‘hadde maad ful many a marriage / Of younge wommen at his owene cost’ (211–13), with the implication that he had made them pregnant and thus needed to supply husbands.
19 draws draws up.
20–1 strokes . . . Of flatters, lulls, ingratiates himself with. Proverbially, the way to catch trout is by tickling the gills.
21 whoever lacks] parenthetical in F2 (who ever lacks)
21–2 whoever . . . blacks even if members of the family have to do without, the parson takes care of himself first; that is, he must be paid his parish dues (Butler, 1991–2, 473) or perquisites for conducting marriages and funerals. The reference may include black clothing worn at funerals (see Epigr. 44.3); or black hangings or draperies for funerals (OED, 4b), which he might rent out.
23 holds . . . burials He supports or sustains events like weddings and burials, which also provide him with an income for performing marriage and funeral services.
24 tithing income; referring to the one-tenth tax paid to support the church.
24 gossips’ stalls long seats or doorless church pews reserved for godparents, rented by the parson for additional income.
25 top . . . mess at the head of the table always at parish or community dinners.
26 Comforts the widow If the parallel between Chaucer’s Friar and Jonson’s parson holds, then he charms the widow out of her money for his own comfort, not hers: ‘Yit wolde he have a ferthing er he wente’ (257).
27 sack white wine, with an ironic glance at the sackcloth and ashes worn by biblical mourners.
27 ’bove above, indicating his higher status at public meetings or feasts, closer to the head of the table.
28–9 He knows more about secular law (‘the wardmote quest’) than he does of biblical (‘Levitic’) law. The wardmote quest was a judicial inquiry made by citizens or company liverymen of a town ward, presided over by the alderman; cf. Christmas, 225–6. Levitic law was administered by the Levites, the Israelite priests whose function was regulating ritual (OED, first citation).
28 wardmote quest] F2 (Ward-mote Quest)
28 can understands or has special knowledge of.
29 mystery Usually applied to theological or religious rites, but here meaning secular secrets in trade or politics.
30 His intricate knowledge of secular matters stuns his parish council.
30 clerkship scholarship.
32 Like Chaucer’s Monk, who goes well-furnished (‘for no cost wolde he spare’, 192) in fur-lined sleeves, a gold pin on his hood, supple leather boots, and generally ‘ful fat and in good point’ (200).
33 epigram short witty poem.
33 clerk scholar.
34 any’s] F2 (any’is)
34 bulk Punning on scholarship and appearance, with a weight of just under 20 stone (Und. 54.12). The ageing Jonson frequently mocked himself for ‘My mountain belly and my rocky face’ (Und. 9) and ‘As Horace fat’; see also ‘A Celebration of Charis in Ten Lyric Pieces’ (2.30–2), in which Jonson is the ungainly middle-aged lover ‘In a Hercules his shape’ (see Und. 2.2.32). Hercules in classical comedy was represented as a fat dunce, always eating or seeking food.
36 man poet.
36 ’em the character sketches.
37 blanks in blank verse. The character of Palate was in rhyming couplets.
39–40 letting . . . share ignoring God’s influence, ascribes disease more to natural causes, like Chaucer’s Doctor of Physic, whose ‘studye was but litel on the Bible’ (Gen. Prol., 439) and who used ‘images’ dictated by the stars’ astrological positions to effect cures (see Rut’s invented sleep-walking scenario and its ironic aftermath in 5.4ff.). Despite Rut’s lewd focus on bodily appetites and symptoms, described below, his diagnoses tend to ignore the evidence of the body or ‘nature’.
40 licentious in discourse unrestrained by law, decorum, or morality in his conversation.
41 professed voluptuary self-confessed sensualist.
41 voluptuary] F2 (Voluptary)
42 slave of money Chaucer’s Doctor ‘loved gold in special’ (Gen. Prol., 446).
42 buffoon] F2 (Buffon)
42 buffoon crude clown.
43 Obscene Offensive to modesty or decency; lewd.
43 vents utters; medically, evacuates or discharges.
44 saucy (1) insolent, offensive (as opposed to mischievous or cheeky, in the modern sense); (2) ‘that passeth not how ill he speaketh or doth to a man: also shameless, ribald, and unclean’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
46 SD] appears as initial SD of 1.3 in F2
47 afore the door in the street; cf. Ind. 62 and 1.1.
48 SD] not in F2
1.3 ] F2 (Act I. Scene III.)
1 0]no SD, this edn; Lady, Palate, Rut. F2
1 ’tis] F2 (tis)
1.3 1 she’s i.e. Placentia is.
1 bestowed given in marriage.
3 He . . . suitors Sir Moth is Placentia’s financial trustee and joint guardian with Lady Loadstone in that capacity; his opinion on suitors has authority, according to the Steel will.
3 portion marriage portion, dowry.
4 withal] F2 (with all)
4 withal therewith.
5 Hinc illae lachrimae ‘Hence these tears’ (Lat.), Terence, Andria, 126, and Horace, Epist., 1.19.41; paraphrased by Jonson in the next line.
5 lacrimae] F2 (lachrymae)
6 That i.e. the grievance. Rut uses the demonstrative for emphasis, perhaps to connect ‘flows’ with his pun on ‘main’ (7).
8 But Neither more nor less than (OED, 6b).
9 lay it down release it, hand it over.
13 real (1) relating to real property, real estate (OED, 6); (2) current, actual (concerning things) (OED, 7b); (3) perhaps most pertinent is the related term, ‘Chattel real’, a lease or ward (OED, Chattel 4b), since defining the ward becomes Compass’s primary concern.
14–15 instrument . . . sail by Establishes Compass’s directional purpose in the play, linking him explicitly to the mariner’s compass.
17 feather cavalier, the feather associated with the military (not in OED). The cavalier hat, a hat with a feather (usually ostrich), was worn by Royalists in Charles I’s reign (OED, Cavalier 4); Captain Ironside is described as wearing a huge feather in his hat at 3.3.61–2. For the full visual effect of the feather, see Rembrandt’s portrait of An Old Man in Military Costume (1630/1), owned by the Getty Museum (Santa Monica).
19 him Compass.
22 Dislike Disapproves.
22 He Sir Moth Interest.
23 the other Compass.
25 there’s] F2 (ther’s)
26 comes who comes.
27 brooks tolerates.
28 assignèd intended.
29 Not . . . ear That is, Sir Moth is deaf to that argument. ‘To hear of both ears’ means to hear both sides of a question, to be impartial (H&S). The negative implies a partisan or unfair attitude.
35 SH palate] F3 (Pal.); Bal. F2, not indented
36 neat refined, smartly dressed.
37 thread.] F2 (thred)
37 thread (1) appearance, figure; (2) fine quality of material in a garment.
41 talking given to talking; garrulous, loquacious.
41 soothing flattering.
41 sometime governing on occasion managing the household; formerly directing or overseeing a young person (as Polish had supervised Placentia up to now).
1.4 ] F2 (Act I. Scene IV.)
1 0]no SD, Wilkes; Polish, Lady, Palate, Rut. F2
1 SH polish] Wh (Pol.); Pal. F2
1.4 5 Ridley, Barlow Mark Ridley, A Short Treatise of Magnetical Bodies and Motions (1613) and William Barlow, Magnetical Advertisements (1616). In response to Barlow’s publication, Ridley produced Magneticall Animadversions (1617), questioning Barlow’s disagreements both with Ridley and with William Gilbert, author of the seminal De Magnete (1600), and claiming that ships relying on Barlow’s compass specifications would run aground. Barlow rebutted with A Brief Discovery of the Idle Animadversions of Mark Ridley, appended to the second edition of Barlow’s text (1618), blasting Ridley for plagiarizing Barlow’s treatise while it was detained at the printer’s, and supplying copious evidence to prove the charge. Barlow’s reprint includes a letter from William Gilbert, praising Barlow’s inventions.
5 Barlow!] F2 (Barlow?)
7 mean intend.
8 both dead Ridley died in 1624, and Barlow in 1625.
11 charge person entrusted to the care of another.
13–14 shoot . . . horse Military or tournament activities: engage in archery practice, shoot arrows at targets; and ride a war horse (OED, 21), athletically masculine exercises. Dr Rut exaggerates the contrast between gendered activities which Placentia may and may not perform.
13 butts,] this edn; Buts. F2
14 crunch] F2 (cranch)
14 crunch F2’s ‘cranch’ is an earlier form of crunch (OED).
15–16 small coal . . . lime . . . hair . . . Soap-ashes . . . loam The protein and minerals in these recommended snacks are supposed to counter symptoms of green sickness (see 2.2.22) and dropsy (see 17 below, notes on green sickness and dropsy): they build up iron, cleanse the system, correct acidity, and restore pH balance. They are also used in the manufacture of steel, metaphorically pertinent here.
15 small coal cinders, or charcoal.
15 eat you eat; the ethical dative (you) merely indicates a point of indirect interest to the listener.
15 lime limestone.
16 Soap-ashes Wood ash used in making soap. Wood ash not only supplies calcium and potassium, but also raises the pH balance, like lime.
16 dainty (1) in delicate health; (2) delightful, exquisite (see 63 and note below); (3) tasty.
16 spice perfume; medically, slight trace of some physical disorder. As his name would suggest, Rut scents the sexual changes of puberty in his patient.
17 green sickness chlorosis, or iron deficiency anaemia; a disease of virgins at puberty, with symptoms of greenish pallor, tendency to hysteria, and morbid appetite (also found in pregnancy). See Mendelson and Crawford (1998), 18–30.
17 ’Od shield! May God shield us!
17 dropsy oedema, or swelling caused by the unnatural collection of fluid in a body cavity, especially resulting in a bloated stomach, which thus might be confused with pregnancy. Symptoms include insatiable craving (OED, 2), as in the odd list of snacks above (15–16), exhaustion, or loss of appetite. Ingestion of calcium and magnesium may help to replenish minerals lost in the course of the disease.
18 toy something of little importance (OED, 5). Cf. 2.3.36.
20 right worshipful distinguished in character or rank, and entitled to honour or respect on this account (OED, Worshipful 2); cf. Tub, 5.7.37–8.
21 peace be quiet.
22 sister Mode of address, in a transferred sense; probably designating Polish as an observant member of a reformed church sisterhood (OED, 3b, 5).
26 who’s Placentia too That is, the girls have the same name: both mean ‘pleasure’, but Pleasance has the Englished version. The twinning of the two girls has implications for the plot (see Introduction).
29 curious exquisite, beautiful (OED, 14).
29–30 left / A legacy bequeathed; that is, left to be raised by Polish as guardian (see 39–40), but the wording suggests no difference between the infant and the estate.
32 in childbed of complications following childbirth. The dangers and deaths caused by childbirth were strong seventeenth-century puritan concerns. See Thickstun (1991).
35 immortal,] Wh; immortal; F2
36 say,] this edn; say: F2
36 not the faithful not even the faithful, or the members of the puritan sect to which the ‘godly’ belong.
38 she Polish.
38 spend expend, waste.
40 polish refine through education and training. Polish plays on her name (The Persons that Act, 2).
42 brains, My] this edn; brains. My F2
43 could write had attained (OED, 8c). Lady Loadstone, perhaps ironically, misinterprets Polish at line 44 as literally referring to handwriting.
43 a quarter old three months old. Peter Barnes in his 1987 BBC Radio radio production interpreted it as four years old.
46 It wasn’t until she was twelve years old that I called for her.
49 Polish has done most of the talking in this scene; Rut expresses the hope that she, like the proverbial cat, has used up her nine lives and will now fall silent as the dead.
50 Sir Apparently addressed to Palate.
53 so provided that.
53 still (1) in spite of what has been stated, notwithstanding (OED, 6b); (2) in addition (OED, 4e).
56, 57 condemned blamed, disapproved of; suggesting the hypocritical world of puritanical morality.
57 very hard apparently unfeeling, callous; not easily moved to part with money (OED, 8, 9).
58 proved] this edn; ’prov’d F2
59 Master Steel left another sixteen thousand pounds to charity, although ‘good uses’ might suggest any investment that Sir Moth feels is ‘good’, and for him that might simply mean further money-making.
61 he . . . He Master Steel had married the sister of Lady Loadstone and Sir Moth Interest. The brother Interest now holds the Steel money as trustee.
62 grip] F2 (gripe)
62 liberal generous.
63 dainty delightful, exquisite (see 1.4.16n.).
1.5 ] F2 (Act I. Scene V.)
1.5 0 SD . .  To them, [enter] The exact timing of this entry is uncertain, but generally all SDs that begin with ‘To them’ indicate that characters actually enter sometime during the five previous lines, and may pause, observe, and/or eavesdrop, seen only by the audience, before they actually join others onstage and speak. In the conventions of continuous staging, such practice is typical (see 1.7, 2.4, and implied in 2.5); Jonson’s stage-sitters in EMO comment frequently on such entrances.
1 SH compass] Wh; not in F2
0 SD] this edn; To them. in right margin. / Compasse, Ironside. centred below, F2
1 her Mistress Steel.
1 torture Assumed jokingly to precede confession. Here, the specific torment is having to hear Polish’s verbal assault.
2–3 husband? . . .were,] this edn; husband, . . . were? F2
4 turtles turtle doves, proverbial lovebirds, as in Dent, T624: ‘As true as a turtle to her mate’.
5 Take her off Remove her, relieve me of her (OED, 83g); implying Polish is a dog who needs to be pulled away from baiting its victim. (Cf. 1.4.49, Rut’s sneer that Polish is a cat with nine lives to talk through.)
8 Doctors Palate ‘for the mind’ as doctor of theology, and Rut ‘for the body’, as doctor of medicine (line 9 below).
10 She Mistress Steel.
10 dispute contend with opposing arguments; debate. Concerning persuasive preaching, John Brinsley argued that ‘none are debarred from touching of it. It is not only the liberty but the duty of every private Christian to further the cause of the gospel’ (Epistle Dedicatory, The Preacher’s Charge, 1631).
11 Spital Church of St Mary Spitalfields, near the hospital of St Mary, founded in 1471, in Bishopsgate Without, Spitalfields; the ‘Spital Sermons’, attended by the lord mayor, were preached regularly in the churchyard; cf. Und. 42, 69–71 (Chalfant, 1978, 165–6).
12 Arminians The followers of Jacob Arminius (1560–1609), who considered themselves moderate Protestants, but were in fact at the heart of a significant religious controversy, particularly in the Caroline period. The tenets of English Arminianism, a more Catholic (see Polish’s comment at line 17 below) and anti-Calvinistic sect that nevertheless was part of the Church of England, were established by its two chief proponents, Richard Montague and John Cosin, and gained increasing power after 1619 during the rule of Laud and his bishops. Arminian doctrines stressed ‘the value of good works, the availability of grace, and the possiblity of free will’ as opposed to ‘the more pessimistic, deterministic, and necessitarian emphases of Calvinist predestination’. Nevertheless, any discussion of religious matters onstage was dangerous, and Mag. Lady is the only play of the 1620s and 1630s even to mention Arminianism (Butler, 1991–2, 475, 479). Though in the early modern period Arminianism was anathema to puritans, in the next century it was the doctrine of John Wesley and most of the Methodist churches.
12 Arminians] F2 state 2; Armenians state 1
12 Armenians Malapropism for Arminians; see next note.
15 Medes and Persians Compass baits another ‘national’ trap for Polish, to follow up on ‘Armenians’. Proverbially, the law of the Medes and the Persians is the type of something unalterable; cf. Daniel, 6.12. Polish identifies Persians as ‘precisians’ or puritans (18), so called because they were rigidly precise or punctilious in religious observance; and Medes as only middlingly devout (20). Although Polish is acute in worldly matters, her ignorance of history and religion makes intellectual hash out of these topics; her muddle may also indicate Jonson’s view of how religious contrroversy affected those who could not understand the issues but took sides out of misguided zeal.
20 lukewarm ‘Forsake . . . thy lukewarmness . . . hang not any longer in the midst between the reformed Churches and that that is Antichristian’, Thomas Brightman (1615), cited by Butler (1991–2), 476. Radical puritans, like the Steels in Polish’s narrative, were violently antagonistic towards Arminians and moderate Protestants.
20 protestants!] F2 (Protestants?)
21 Out, out! Rut scoffs at Polish’s opinion.
21–2 branching . . . branched adorned with figured patterns of embroidery; over-embellished; punning in the last instance on ‘diverging’ (see 23n. first note below). Militant Calvinists saw the elaborate vestments preferred by Arminians as papist signs, in contrast to puritans’ plain clothing and simple doctrines.
23 Beside their texts Straying from their texts (H&S).
23 Stint Be quiet.
23 carline old witch (OED, Carline 1b).
23 hear.] Wh; heare, F2
24 her,] this edn; her F2
24 persons Possibly another malapropism, like the confusion over Arminians. H&S point out that the spelling for ‘person’ was ‘parson’ in the fourteenth to seventeenth centuries, and the wordplay is also coloured by the biblical phrase ‘respecter of persons’. Puritans believed that each individual soul could be inspired to understand God’s word directly, and did not require intermediary priests or parsons to interpret for them.
26 Death By God’s death.
28 bait harass or persecute.
32 If she had a good intelligence, death has now destroyed it.
33 zealous puritan, fervent in her faith.
34 lighted . . . truth inspired or ignited fervour.
36 learnèd] this edn; learn’d F2; learned Wh, G
36 learnèd F2’s spelling suggests that the whole line is meant to be trochaic pentameter, not iambic; that is, the emphases fall on ‘She . . . too . . . to . . . long . . . us’, the last being an incomplete metrical foot. Iambics make better metrical sense.
37 could understood.
37 holy tongue Hebrew.
38 pricks Diacritic marks indicating vowels and other linguistic functions.
38 Masoreth A sixteenth-century compilation of critical and traditional information relating to the text of the Hebrew Bible recorded by scholars up to the tenth century (OED). Besides fully treating textual questions in the Old Testament, the editors of the Masoreth ‘tabulated such minutiae as the middle word and middle letter of each book’ (H&S), with the implication here that Mistress Steel, like other puritans, was fascinated by prophetic materials that seemed to have a divinely mathematical basis of accounting for the future.
39 Burton Henry Burton (1578–1648), an extremist puritan rector in London, whose earlier extensive publications had involved him in serious court appearances, was controversial and dangerous: his book, The Baiting of the Pope’s Bull. Or An Unmasking of the Mystery of Iniquity, Folded Up in a Most Pernicious Brief or Bull, Sent from the Pope Lately into England, to Cause a Rent Therein, for his Reentry (1627), led to his being questioned by the Privy Council, and subsequent imprisonment in 1629. He and Prynne (see next notes below) became Laudian ‘martyrs’ in 1637.
39 scribe Prynne gent. William Prynne (1600–69) was a lawyer who began his career as a prolific pamphleteering writer in 1626 with an attack on Arminian doctrine, thus earning the enmity of Laud, then bishop of London (see, for example, The Perpetuity of a Regenerate Man’s Estate, 1627). His virulent and voluminous anti-Arminian critiques of 1626–30 often named the author as ‘William Prynne, gent. Lincolnshire’, hence the satiric barb of Jonson’s reference. His later Histriomastix: The Player’s Scourge, or Actor’s Tragedy (1633), a blast against the stage as a place of vice, was, under the influence of Laud, now archbishop of Canterbury, interpreted as an attack on Charles I and Henrietta Maria; Prynne was fined, imprisoned (1633), pilloried (1634), and partly shorn of his ears. He continued pamphleteering from jail and in 1637 was again fined, sentenced to life imprisonment, deprived of the remainder of his ears, and branded with the letters S.L. (for seditious libeller). Nevertheless, he was released by 1640, and went on to a long and tumultuous political career (ODNB).
39 Prynne, gent.] G; Prin-Gent! F2; Prin, gent. Wh
40 Presto-begone A conjuring term (H&S); possibly intended to refer to John Preston (1527–1628), Protestant divine (Whalley); or, still befuddled by her Arminian/Armenian error, Polish may garble a reference to Prester John, the alleged Christian priest–king of the middle ages who was said to reign somewhere beyond Armenia. By 1598, the idea of Prester John was transferred or used figuratively for anyone supreme in a certain sphere, as Polish argues here for the supreme wit and zeal of Mrs Steel; e.g. Everard Guilpin, Skialethia: ‘And fools do sit, / More honoured than the Prester John of wit’ (OED, 1b).
40 Pharisees Members of an ancient Jewish sect distinguished by strict adherence to doctrine and ritual, and valuing outward shows of morality rather than inner piety.
41 vouchsafe graciously condescend (courtly idiom).
44 SD] G; not in F2
45 she Polish. Lady Loadstone defends her gossip against her male guests’ criticism.
45 earnest strident in her zeal.
48 port carry; playing on ‘transport’ (47).
49 long grace long-drawn-out prayer at table, a habit for which Jonson frequently criticized puritans; cf. ‘wire-drawn grace’ (Alch., 3.2.88).
52 sanguinary one addicted to bloodshed, delighting in carnage (OED, 2b cites this line).
55 An infliction of damage or slaughter (OED, 5) requiring three days and nights to complete.
56–7 succession . . . issue begetting heirs, or fathering many children.
60–1 in . . . infant as innocent and ready for salvation as a baby.
61–4 his . . . those] G; parenthetical in F2
61–4 his employments . . . those A parenthetical remark in F2. Compass offhandedly argues that Ironside was so busy killing the enemy in battle that he had no time or opportunity to commit any other sins.
67 coarse] F2 (course)
68 beam (1) ray of light emitted from a luminous body, here Lady Loadstone; (2) glance, gleam of the eye, suggesting an attraction between Lady Loadstone and Ironside; (3) mathematically, radius of a circle, axial line that goes to the centre of the circle. See OED, 19, 21, 22. The implication is that Lady Loadstone’s bright and piercing eye sees straight into the heart or truth of things, stimulated and strengthened by Ironside’s presence. See 71n.below.
69 illustrate illuminate. (Accented on the second syllable.)
70 cured Healing, though only figurative here, was the concern of the lady or mistress of the household.
71 compliment] F2 (Complement)
71 compliment As Happé points out, Jonson’s spelling ‘complement’ may mean either ‘compliment’, implying, in reponse to the lady’s flattering approval of his noble profession, Ironside’s returning his own commendation of her courtesy; or ‘complement’, implying their eventual union in the magnetic metaphor in which iron caps complete the loadstone’s power by containing and concentrating it.
1.6 ] F2 (Act I. Scene VI.)
0 SD] this edn; To them. in right margin. / Sir Diaphanous. Practise. centred below, F2
1.6 1 prime (1) primary, first in rank or importance; influential (OED, 2); (2) sexually excited or ruttish (OED, 5), since both are wooers; (3) youthful (OED, 1); (4) in arithmetic, of two or more numbers in relation to each other: having no common measure except unity (OED, 7). In the last definition, Diaphanous and Practice have nothing in common except for being suitors in the house (and participants in the magnetic metaphor).
1 magnetic attracted, or magnetized, because drawn to the house.
2 Arctic] F2 (Artick!)
2–3 Arctic . . . Antarctic Thus placing the two apparent rivals as the opposing poles of the magnetic field, the courtier (Diaphanous) at the one extreme and the professional lawyer (Practice) at the other.
3 Silkworm,] this edn; Silke-worme! F2
6 horary hourly.
6 shifts changes of clothing.
9 trim (1) fashionable appearance; adornment; (2) nautically, state of being fully rigged, shipshape, ready to sail; or more specifically the adjustment of sails in consideration of the direction of the wind and the ship’s course; hence of interest in a play governed by a character called Compass. See 2.2.33 and note.
11 Encomiastic Commendation.
11 much in little pithy, but brief, proverbially (Dent, M1284). That is, Compass’s description of Diaphanous has conveyed a great deal in a short character sketch.
12 quick vivid, acutely reasoned, witty (OED, 12, 21).
16 preferments advancements in position or status; privileges, especially prior rights to receive payment or to purchase an available item.
17 thund’ring] F2 (thundring)
17 bruit (1) military noise, especially of guns; (2) gossip, or any rumour spread abroad.
18 eighty-eight 1588, the year of the Spanish Armada, defeated off the coast of England.
18 threat’ning] F2 (threatning)
20 Syracusa’s . . . Archimede Archimedes, the philosopher and mathematician, was reputedly intent on working out a mathematical problem when he was killed by a Roman soldier during the sack of Syracuse (212 bc).
21 nightcap small cap, or biggen, worn by lawyers.
21 bench-gown robe worn in court by lawyers and judges.
22 guard ornamental border or trimming on the gown.
22 o’th’] F2 (o’th)
22-3 show a man / Betrothed] G; shew / A man betroth’d F2
26 clots fools.
27 ground (1) basis of a system or fundamental principle; (2) nautically, the bottom of the sea, located by means of sounding. Practice seems to believe that Compass holds the practice of law in contempt, since applying the law is not as philosophically coherent, profound, or ‘deep’ as Compass’s study of mathematical cause and effect.
30 devowed devoted, dedicated.
31 to their inches to their own capacities, or the best of their abilities.
31 within inside Lady Loadstone’s house.
33 selling,] Happé; selling! F2
33 has who has.
34 method,] Wh; method! F2
35 logarithms The latest method of working out interest on investments (invented by John Napier, published in Latin, 1614, and in English, A Description of the Admirable Table of Logarithmes, with Henry Briggs, in 1617). Speidell, A Brief Treatise of Spherical Triangles (1627) introduced Part Ⅱ, New Logarithms, by claiming that the method was simple, and required only an understanding of basic arithemetic. Wingate, Arithmetic Made Easy (1630), has a chapter on ‘Interest of money’, 473–6, in which he illustrates the use of logarithms to show how A’s three-year-old daughter might have her £1,000 dowry doubled over a twelve-year period. See Introduction.
36 stock investment.
37 commodity object or material item of trade.
39 parallax Astronomical term: the apparent displacement of an object caused by the changed position of the point of observation; specifically, the angular amount of the difference of positions, being the angle contained between the two straight lines drawn to the object from the two points of view, and constituting the measure of the distance of the object (OED, 1). Compass offers a cynical mathematics to describe Interest’s narrow and fixed focus on profit.
45 indenture contract, signed and cut in half with a serrated edge so that when the pieces are brought together at a later time, the edges tally, proving they are the original document. Here the term is metaphorical, pointing to the pre-agreement between Interest and Bias, now entering.
45 If . . . so If you accept their decision, there’s nothing I can do. The implication is that Lady Loadstone should be wary of dealing with these men, since making money is their chief concern.
1.7 ] F2 (Act I. Scene VII.)
0 SD] this edn; To them. in right margin. / Interest. Bias. centred below, F2
1.7 1 he Bias.
1 vi-politic,] F2 (Vi-politique!)
1 vi-politic assistant to a politician (see The Persons that Act, 15n.).
2 sub-aiding giving secret aid, but here in the sense of secretarial assisting behind the scene to prepare an official for public duties.
2 state:] F2 (State!)
3 laborious painstaking, hardworking.
4 man — and] this edn; man! (and F2
4 come on be successful, get promoted.
4 on!] this edn; on) F2
5 attendance,] F2 (attendance!)
5 attendance assiduous service (OED, 3).
5 of such a stride so confident and assertive in his behaviour.
7 t’advise with to take advice from.
8 prescribed told what to do.
9 he the less competent official, nominally in charge, identified only as Lord Whach’um below at 11.
10 less!] F2 (lesse.)
12 maniples bundles (cf. 2.6.149).
14 overrules prevails over others in giving his opinions (OED, 3).
14 though] F2 (tho’,)
18 rest prop, security.
19 farrago mixture of odds and ends; originally, mixed fodder for cattle (H&S).
20 made-dish concoction or stew of many ingredients.
22-3 Hang . . . opens.] this edn; (Hang . . . opens) F2
22–3 Hang . . . praises That is, listen to this, because Practice has given the negative side, and now Moth will give the positive view of Bias.
23 opens (1) discloses or divulges his opinions (OED, 9); (2) nautically, gets an open view of a situation by rounding or passing some intervening object (OED, 8), here Bias; (3) legally, states a case, preliminary to adducing evidence, on the affirmative side (OED, 14).
25 close Appropriate secretarial behaviour: close-mouthed, knowing secrets but not telling.
25 Sister,] F2 state 2; Sister! state 1
28 tip earlobe.
29 chrysolite green semi-precious gem.
29 agate variegated precious stone.
30 quar quarry, using a mining metaphor.
31 Machiavel Niccolò Machiavelli, the quintessential resource for political thinking in the early modern era, as author of The Prince, a treatise on how a ruler should maintain his state while manipulating it for his own purposes, and using any expedient means to the desired end. The name was synonymous with intrigue and subterfuge.
31 cornelian semi-precious gem, a semi-transparent quartz of a dull red.
32 Tacitus Roman historian, whose first name was Cornelius (hence the pun), also known as a source of political wisdom, a Machiavellian before Machiavelli.
33 brooch . . . state-cap Like the jewel used to decorate the hat of a high official, Bias would enhance the power of any politician in Europe.
34 as as if.
36 true jests Proverbially, ‘There is many a true word spoken in jest’ (Tilley, W772).
37 relish please.
38 caract Punning on (1) character; (2) carat, weight of gems.
39 unvaluable invaluable, beyond price.
40 relations narratives of events.
41 Courants Express messages; or reports of current events in newspapers.
41 avises intelligence, information from spies; dispatches. The term, now obsolete, was used interchangeably with the Spanish avisos (see OED, Aviso, 1634 citation from Habington).
41 correspondences letters.
43 screw you out insinuate himself into favour or confidence in order to discover; contrive by spying or skilful extraction to find out (‘you’ is the ethical dative. alerting the listener to a point of interest).
43 statist skilled politician or stateman.
44 cobbler One who mends clumsily, possibly marring the work in the process (OED, 2, first citing Nashe, 1594).
44 worms a dog extracts a ligament from under a dog’s tongue as a preventative for rabies (OED, Worm v. Ⅱ 3).
45 cabinet treasure-house (OED, 6).
46–7 Till’t . . . long Until the turns of the screw (see 43 above) twist, stretch, or otherwise entrap the political underling (‘insect or fly’) into revealing the full extent of what he knows.
48 reversion right of succession to a political office when it becomes vacant.
50–1 Bi- . . . as Compass makes the name mean ‘twice an ass’, a disyllabic pronunciation used in Barnes’s radio broadcast, in which Bias sounds more asinine by speaking with a strong lisp (see Introduction).
51 -as] H&S (-as); as F2; ass F3
52 turns tricks of the trade, a term with dubious implications often used of mischievous acts or sexual services, as well as of services or duties associated with any office.
56 so provided that.
62 habitual gravity serious demeanour (a kind of performance).
62 prefers gets a promotion for.
64 formal external, that is, hypocritical.
67 shrink flinch, quailing or recoiling because of fear or distaste.
68 calotte White cap of a sergeant-at-law.
68 politic hood In apposition to calotte.
69 parerga secondary features (from Gk parergon).
69 o’the by besides, in addition.
70 seculars laymen, or non-professionals in law and politics.
70 trick him spoil his opportunity, cheat him out of his expectations.
71 come] F3; came F2
74 Surveyor . . . general An invented office, and the term ‘projects’ is usually satirical (e.g. Devil, 2.1 and elsewhere, associating projects with monopolies and corruption). A surveyor appointed by the government might be in charge of crown lands or other administrative departments, or have the authority of a principal magistrate (OED, 1b, f, and 5). See Introduction on the connection between measurement and law. The office held by Thinwit (cf. 4.6.16–17 and 5.3.12ff.) may be a satirical allusion to Inigo Jones’s appointment as surveyor general of the works from 1615 (DNB); Jonson certainly had him in mind as ‘Master Surveyor’ in ‘Expostulation’, 6.375, lines 1-2.
76 nemo scit Literally, no one knows (Lat.); cf. Staple, 1.5.105.
76 think on’t think about the suitability of Bias as Placentia’s husband.
Chorus 1 ] this edn; Chorus. F2
Chorus 1 1 censure you do you think of. ‘Censure’ meant think critically, but in the early modern period did not assume a negative critique.
1 protasis The first act of a play, or its basic exposition, in which the characters are introduced and the subject or argument is proposed. This and subsequent Gr. terms were defined by J. C. Scaliger in Poetice (1561), 1.9.
2 presentment presentation, performance.
4–5 no act] F2 state 2; no act state 1
7 protasis] F3; Protesis F2
7 ’em] H&S (‘hem); not in F2; [them] G
7 catastrophe the conclusion or denouement of a play.
8 epitasis complication, the part of the play where the plot thickens (generally Act 2).
8 catastasis turning point, or part of a comedy (generally Acts 3 and 4) in which the plot is developed and heightened until it is ripe for unravelling in the catastrophe.
12–19 child . . . miracles Other than the onstage birth, and the omission of an onstage death, the plot thus described sounds like Beaumont’s The Knight of the Burning Pestle, a satirical send-up of middle-class values and theatrical tastes. Jonson wrote a similar passage in EMI (F), Prol., 7–15, perhaps modelled upon Sir Philip Sidney’s mockery of playwrights ignoring the unity of time in Apology for Poetry (Happé).
15–16 land, . . . paynims] F2 state 2; land, . . . Pannims state 1
16 paynims pagans.
16 boars . . . cows . . . monsters Peck notes that Guy killed a boar and a dragon (ch. 11) and a dun (dull brown) cow on Dunsmore Heath (ch. 6) in The History of Guy, Earl of Warwick. Day and Dekker’s The Life and Death of Guy, Earl of Warwick (now lost) was performed at Islington by Lord Derby’s Men in 1618 and entered in the Stationers’ Register on 15 January 1620 (H&S). Cooper (2001) suggests Jonson may have had a hand in an earlier (1593) version of the play.
17 daughter] F2 state 2; Daughter: state 1
17 mistress; convert] Wh; Mrs.Convert F2
18–19 lame . . . miracles.] F2 state 2; lame, . . . miracles: state 1
18 all-to-beladen totally loaded, burdened all over (see OED, All 14, 15). See a similar construction in ‘all-to-be-married’ (5.2.2) or ‘all-to-kissed’ (5.2.13).
20 take delight, seize or engage the imagination of.
22 this pen i.e., Jonson.
23 juggle play tricks, entertain with magic or conjuring.
23 Hocus-pocus Proper name or nickname of the conjuror and stage juggler of the 1620s and 1630s, derived from the sham Latin formula used by him to precede tricks; see also Staple, 2 Intermean, 12, and Augurs, 221. Bawcutt (1996a, 79) has the fullest account in print of Hocus-pocus’s touring in the English provinces during this period.
24 then, . . . people,] this edn; F2 (then, . . . People; state 1; then; . . . People, state 2
24 Travitanto Tudesko Untraced entertainer, loosely ‘Juggling German’ (travio,–are, to mislead); possibly a reference to Bernardino Ricco, ‘il Tedeschino’ (the little German), a buffoon at Grand Duke Frederick Ⅱ’s court in Tuscany (H&S).
24 Tudesko] italic in F2 state 2; Tudeske state 1
26 expecters] F2. (expectors)
26 expecters those who expect. The F2 spelling ‘expectors’ now refers to spitters, those who expectorate.
27 expect . . . understand A frequent Jonsonian comment on audiences; in EMO, Asper describes ‘Attentive auditors’ as those who come to the theatre ‘to feed their understanding parts’ (Ind., 199–201) as opposed to bad audiences described in the ‘Articles of agreement’ of Bart. Fair, especially the warning that ‘no person here is to expect more than he knows’ (Ind., 86); also illustrated in the intermeans of Staple (see 33–4n. below).
28 peremptory dogmatic (OED, 3); arbitrarily dismissive of another opinion, based on the legal term applied to one-sided but binding objections (OED, 1).
28 jack Derogatory term for an ill-mannered lad or knave; but also a nickname for ‘John’, and commonly designating a Cornishman (see 48–51 below).
29 who those who.
31 well:] F2 state 2; well. state 1
32 like . . . wit like a judge without a sense of humour sitting on a witty case. In Inns of Court parlance, ‘solemn’ usually refers to the dignity of senior lawyers and judges. The phrase is an echo of the prefatory epistle to the Shakespeare first folio’s ‘magistrate of wit’ arraigning plays daily at Blackfriars (see Dubia, 3(a), Electronic Edition). Also see ‘Commission of the brain’, ‘Ode to Himself’ (‘Come, leave’)’, 6.310, line 8.
33–4 Madam Expectation In Staple, one of the female audience of gossips who, like Damplay and Probee, comment on the play between the acts. The Prologue cautions her to ‘expect no more than you understand’ (Ind., 26); she, like Damplay, refuses to co-operate with the house rules.
34 pissing while Proverbially, a very short time (Dent, P355: ‘To stay a pissing-while’); cf. TGV, 4.4.16. This phrase leads to a series of water images: springs, source (stream), steep (soak), bathe, fomenting (bathing with warm liquid) (35–7).
35 degrees!] F2 state 2; degrees: state 1
35 ridiculous laughable, provoking laughter.
37 velvet expensively dressed. Cf. Ind. 25.
38 lethargy sleepy person; that is, lame-brain or numbskull. OED, 3 cites Shirley, The Example, 1634, as the first usage, but Jonson’s pre-dates it.
39 your poet’s quarrel Possibly a specific reference to ‘Ode to Himself’ (after New Inn) with its references to clothes. But Jonson’s plays and poems are riddled with critical comments on fashion, like the one cited at 42–3n. below.
40 indifferent more or less, fairly.
41 King Jonson was frequently in debt in the Caroline period, and had some difficulty receiving both his wages as London city chronologer, a position that reverted to him after Thomas Middleton’s death in 1628, and his £100 pension from Charles, to whom he appealed in Und. 68 and 76; Charles ensured that Jonson got his money, though payments continued to be irregular (Kay, 1995, 170).
42–3 his clothes . . . him In Discoveries Jonson often comments on courtiers with more clothes than sense; when their clothes, their only source of pride, are worn out, ‘you cannot wish the thing more wretched or dejected’ (1072–3).
43–4 humane letters studies in the humanities.
46 The boy refers to Jonson’s confounding of Envy in the Induction to Poet.
48 Trygust See The Persons that Act, 21n. The Boy identifies himself as Cornish; many Cornish names begin with Tre-, conveniently co-operating homophonically (though in a false etymology) with this allegorical name in relation to the audience.
48 servant ‘Clerk at hand always attending to write’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME); like Richard Brome, who was Jonson’s apprentice and secretary, before launching his own successful career as a playwright. See The Persons that Act, ‘boy’, 21n.
50–1 call . . . spade say plainly what we think; proverbial (Dent, S699).
2.1 0 This scene, like the rest of the play, takes place inside Lady Loadstone’s house.
2.1 ] F2 (Act II. Scene I.)
0 SD] this edn; Keepe. Placentia. Pleasance. F2
1–2 sure . . . now This line focuses the audience on Placentia’s physical condition: an advanced state of pregnancy. How aware other characters beyond this inner circle are is part of the unfolding comedy, but the scenario is a familiar one in commedia dell’arte; see Scala, The Fake Magician (1611; trans. 1967), 149–56.
2–3 Ay . . . choice Placentia worries that too many available suitors may make it too difficult to select a husband. Pleasance’s response, quoting Polish, is proverbial (Dent, S903): abundance, or ‘store’, cannot hurt her prospects (‘is no sore’).
4 wisely as wisely.
5 Fix on one Choose the prospective husband you want. The repetition in line 6 may indicate mere garrulity, or a certain desperation in Keep’s urging, because of the pregnancy; see also Polish’s emphasis in 2.2.13 and her conversation with Needle at 2.2.34–9.
6 call summons, invitation. Usually a divine call to Christian ministry, here the term refers to Lady Loadstone’s invitation to the birthday dinner, and to the summoning of suitors to propose marriage to Placentia; punning on the call to the bar, by which a lawyer is admitted as a barrister, mentioned in the next lines.
7 bench (1) judge’s bench, or bar; (2) English legal term used in the phrase ‘free bench’, referring to the right of a wife, ‘being espoused a virgin’ (OED), in the estate’s copyhold lands after her husband’s death, corresponding to dower in freeholds.
8 Of purpose For the purpose (of proposing marriage).
8 by . . . means through Lady Loadstone’s encouragement of the lawyer as the girl’s suitor.
9 ’Tis . . . the man It is generally thought that Practice will be the lucky man who will marry Placentia.
9 wife –] Happé; wife. F2
10 – is] this edn; Is F2
10 brave excellent, splendid (used loosely in an indeterminate sense: OED, 3).
10 calling form of address.
12 open (1) frank, liberal; (2) as slur, sexually available.
12 close (1) secretive, or capable of keeping secrets; (2) as slur, stingy, mean-minded.
13 cunning (1) wise, knowing; (2) as slur, sly or crafty.
14 neater more refined or elegant.
15 plush rich velvet-like material (silk, cotton, and/or wool blend), with a long soft nap. See Ind. 25.
16 night-crow night-raven or nightjar (cf. Augurs, 289; and Epicene, 3.5.13). Either bird makes cries in the night, and was thought to be an ill omen. More likely, Pleasance means a nocturnal bird, since courtiers often attended evening or late-night festivities, and slept away half the day; see Clerimont’s fashionable habits in Epicene, 1.1.
17 delicate exquisite, sublime.
18 Cannot tell I cannot say; I don’t know.
19 copy abundance (Lat., copia).
19 confound utterly defeat; surprise and confuse.
2.2 ] F2 (Act II. Scene II.)
0 SD] G; Polish. Keepe. Placentia. Pleasance. Needle. F2
2.2 1 dainty See 1.4.16 and note.
2 chanting on chatting or twittering about. The reference is to birdsong (OED, 1).
2 SD] this edn; marked with asterisk in right margin beside lines 2–3, with (∗) before God F2
2 SD kneeling Pleasance adopts the customary greeting to a parent as the first pious act of the morning or last pious act before bedtime, following the biblical commandment to honour one’s father and mother. Children traditionally knelt for parental blessing.
2 God . . . maiden] parenthetical in F2
3 enchanting conjuring, playing on Polish’s word ‘chanting’. Witchcraft associations with the trio of Keep, Polish, and Chair recur throughout the play. Cf. Florio’s (1611) definition of theomancy, ‘a kind of divination or enchanting by abusive calling upon the secret, farfetched, mysterious and wrested names of God’ (LEME).
6 man . . . half exceptional man, worth more than other men.
7 sit about it sit in session for a formal discussion, as in court.
10 prick out select, by marking a list with a tick beside it or line through it; hence, choose, appoint (OED, 15). Punning on Needle’s name, both as a tailor’s tool and as a sexual allusion.
11 SD] G
14 put . . . making selected or put forward for mating or making a match, i.e. as husbands or breeding partners (OED, make, v.2). The two are Practice and Silkworm.
14 third Bias.
20 bachelor unmarried woman (OED, 5, first used here). Usually the term refers to an unmarried man, or generally to an inexperienced person.
20 portion marriage portion, dowry.
21 not alone not only.
22 green sickness See 1.4.14–17 and notes. Polish’s point is that Interest wants to keep the girl unmarried and in poor health so that he can control her money.
25 remora sucking-fish believed to have the power of stopping a ship in mid-course (OED, 1); hence any obstacle or impediment. Cf. W. B. & E. P., A Help to Discourse (1627), 99–100: ‘Q. What little fish is that in the sea that hath the greatest strength? A. The remora, a little fish of half a foot long, which, but by fastening upon it, will stay a ship under sail with wind and tide.’ Ridley, A Short Treatise of Magnetical Bodies (1613, a2r), connects the remora’s power with the magnet’s: ‘if the magnet be preserved in the salt of the sea-lampron or remora, that then is thought to stay a ship under sail, that the magnet will draw up gold that is fallen into the deepest well’. Cf. Mag. Lady, 5.7.46–7 and 5.10.1–6. In some versions of the Cinderella story (see Introduction), the travelling father’s failure to remember his true daughter’s gift has a ‘remora’ effect in that his ship is stayed, thus bringing on all of Cinderella’s misery.
26 goody Abbreviation of goodwife, a usually respectful form of address to lower-class married women; here with an irritated edge at the interrruption. Cf. 4.8.65n.
27 Dame Title of address formerly used for ladies, but by the sixteenth century used only for women of lower rank (OED, 4). The implication is that Keep is getting above herself by joining in the conversation of her betters; Polish intends to put her sharply in her place.
27 of Kat’er’ne’s from St Katherine’s, and hence a madwoman. The hospital, founded in 1148, ‘where they use to keep / The better sort of mad-folks’ (Alch., 5.3.55–6), was razed to make way for the St Katherine’s Docks.
27 Kat’er’ne’s] F2 (Katernes)
27–8 oar . . . cockboat Proverbial (Dent, O4: ‘He will have an oar in every man’s boat’). The comment, given that a cockboat was a small light craft towed behind a larger coasting vessel or riverboat, suggests presumptuous interference, or imitation, like having a finger in every pie, wanting a part in something that is none of her business.
29 Shadwell Two miles east of the city wall on the north bank of the Thames. Aside from its nautical associations, the area was known for its prostitutes (Chalfant, 1978, 160).
30 SD] this edn; [Enter Needle] G at line 29
31 stays (1) stoppages, delays; (2) situations requiring restraint, self-control (OED, n.3 2); (3) laced under-bodices, stiffened with whalebone, and worn to give support and shape to the figure (awkward and unpleasant in Placentia’s condition); (4) nautically, ropes supporting a mast and securing it to another mast or part of the ship (see 32 below).
33 rigged (1) nautically, of a ship fitted out with necessary tackle (cf. 1.6.9n.); (2) dressed up; (3) playing the wanton (OED, Rig v.4); cf. Cleopatra’s allure when she is ‘riggish’, Ant., 2.2.250.
35 Master] G; Mr. F3; Mrs. F2
35 I know somewhat I know something, but I’m not telling what. The nervousness of this exchange between Polish and Needle suggests the tension caused by Rut’s misdiagnosis of Placentia’s pregnancy. See also Polish’s irritation with Keep at 52–5 below.
37 dropsy See 1.4.17 and notes.
37 change the air have a change of air, go into the countryside. See 2.3.28.
41 soothsayers foretellers, seeing into the future.
41 cunning-men wise men, male practitioners of witchcraft.
42 E’en] F2 (Eeene)
43 neat . . . stone-doctor skilful (or, given the sarcasm that follows, perhaps merely ‘elegantly dressed’) family physician, but a genuine sexual practitioner too; punning on the farmyard association of ‘neat’ meaning ox, bull, or other cattle. A stone-horse (with testicles intact), or stallion, was so called to differentiate from a gelding; stone-doctor implies, like the name Rut, testosterone-driven energy. H&S remark on the connection to Lady Loadstone in echoing ‘stone’; that is, Rut is the Lady Loadstone-doctor.
44 gear (1) stuff and nonsense, goings on (OED, 11); (2) organs of generation.
47 the while during the time that.
48–51 I . . . duty I haven’t got the powers of a saint, nor even the powers my lady has, to be supplicated to confer health or sickness whenever I feel like it; instead I wait for destiny, and do my duty.
56 cannot who cannot.
57 Doctor Do-all Polish is sarcastic; Rut demonstrates his incompetence in misdiagnosing Placentia and later in mistreating Interest. The emphasis of the verse in her last phrase, ‘Thence he’s called so’ also puts Rut’s credentials in doubt. Jonson irritatedly called Inigo Jones ‘Dominus Do-/All’ in ‘Expostulation’, 64–5 (6.378).
2.3 ] F2 (Act II. Scene III.)
0 SD] Happé; Rut. Polish. Lady. Keepe. Placentia. F2
2.3 1 Doctor, do all Polish’s quick-witted recasting also supports a sarcastic reading of the line.
3 tend’ring (1) tending, having care and oversight of (Placentia) by fostering or cultivating; (2) attending, serving, or escorting. See OED, Tend 3 and 4; and Tender v.2 3d: treat with affectionate care, foster, take care of or look after.
5 damsel young lady, corruption of demoiselle (Fr.).
6 list please.
6 tiffany thin transparent silk or muslin; cobweb lawn. The meaning is transferred to anything flimsy or easily seen through, like Polish’s flattery here.
7 Especially in] F2 state 2; Especially’in state 1
8 leavened (1) swollen, like rising dough; (2) transformed by some modifying influence; debased or corrupted (see ‘Tainted’, 11, and Epigr. 97, 20).
9 Puffed, blown Swollen, blown up, inflated (see 12 below).
10 Dark by darker? (1) Ignorant comments from an even more uninformed source? See OED, 10; (2) More crazy comments from a madwoman? One medical cure for madness was to keep the patient confined to a dark room (OED, 1b).
10 darker? What] F2 state 2; darker: what state 1
11 Tainted Corrupted, contaminated.
12 Give her vent Relieve her with an outlet to enable an emission or discharge (OED, n.2 3).
12 her vent] F2 state 2; heaven state 1
13 gimlet boring tool; see 21 below.
14 tympanites distension of the abdomen by gas or air in the intestines, in the peritoneal cavity, or in the uterus. H&S cite John Halle’s translation of Lanfrank of Milan his Brief (1565), 53, defining the kinds of dropsy described below.
15 anasarca dropsy affecting subcutaneous cellular tissue of a limb or other large surface of the body, producing a very puffed appearance of the flesh. Halle refers to it as ‘Hyposarca . . . which . . . possesseth the whole habit of the body with much moisture’.
18 hers.] F2 state 2; hers, state 1
17 ascites dropsy of the abdomen; collection of fluid in the peritoneal cavity. Halle adds that the disease affects the ‘great arteries . . . coiling, stretching and aggravating them’.
17 aquosus condition of being filled with water or fluid.
19 which . . . drum.] parenthetical with no end-punctuation in F2
19 drum ‘If the womb be so smitten, it soundeth as a tabour or a timbal [kettledrum]’ (H&S, citing Trevisa’s Bartholomeus de Proprietatibus Rerum, 1535, 7.52).
20 unbraced loosened, detached.
22 a husband In this case, equivalent to the previous line’s ‘a faucet or a peg’. Sexual penetration and activity will puncture the ‘wind bomb’ and release the air.
23 betimes immediately.
25 gleek Three-handed card-game in which the winning hand is three face-cards of the same rank; punning on trick (OED, n.2).
25 crimp Obsolete card-game; punning on entrapment (OED, v.2).
26 right;] this edn; right, F2
27 Tittle-Tattle Chatterbox.
27 Tattle.] H&S; Tattle, F2
29 A coach . . . horses Fashionable transport; see Alch., 4.4.46.
30 weeks,] this edn; weekes! F2 state 2; weeks: state 1
31 return a bride come back to town as a bride or ready to become a bride.
32 hemisphere half of the heavens seen above the horizon (OED, 2: see esp. 1604 quotation).
33 chuck at offer endearments to; bill and coo with. OED does not give these definitions, except by extrapolating from n. 2 1 and v.1 1. Cf. Mac., ‘dearest chuck’, 3.2.45.
33 dropped (1) shed, or voided; (2) given birth to (OED, 14). The verb seems comically apt for the cure of dropsy (see next line).
33 tympany ‘a kind of dropsy, wherein the belly swelleth great [and] wind is the chief occasion’ (Elyot, 1538, LEME). The midwife in Cavendish Ent., 96, ‘can tell when a woman goes with a tympany, the mole, or the moon-calf’, even if Dr Rut cannot.
33 tympany] F3; Timpane F2
35 spice touch (OED, 5b).
38 against in preparation for.
38 SD] G
39 down go down into the country.
41 Resolve . . . man Decide on a husband.
42 To] F2 state 2; To, state 1
42 here is none nobody is here.
44 designed her to designated for her, appointed to the position as her husband.
44 to] F2 state 2; too state 1
45 Practice.] F2 state 2; Practise! state 1
45 neat See 2.2.43 and note.
45 man,] F2 state 2; man? state 1
46 Forward (1) Eager (OED, 6); (2) well-advanced for his years (OED, 7); (3) enterprising, ambitious for advancement (not in OED); cf. ‘Cunning shall better advance thee than riches’ (Palsgrave, 1530, LEME).
47 Like . . . somebody Likely to become someone important.
47 Hall Westminster Hall, where Courts of Common Law were held.
47 stand] Wh; stand! F2
48 pleading hold (provided) arguing law-cases continues as a lucrative and politically important profession.
48 prime See 1.6.1n.
51 at common law Rut puns on Practice’s profession as a lawyer earning income from common law, and on their marriage, which has status in common law.
52–4 Sway . . . cases Rut foresees a successful career based on Practice’s legal skills bolstered by Placentia’s wealth: they will be able to bribe or intimidate judges, lawyers, and clerks, as well as influence witnesses or destroy evidence, all to effect favourable and profitable decisions, making the young couple look impressive.
55 be . . . time take a long time.
56 rise to become, achieve promotion to the rank of.
57 her flower her youth and beauty, the springtime of her life.
58 O’the first head From the first generation of the family to achieve superior rank; here, become a lady, though usually applied to upstart gentlemen (Thomas, 1587, and Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); see Ostovich, EMO, 3.1.138–9 and 4.1.12. Sir Diaphanous is in this upstart category, since he is ‘Old Master Silkworm’s heir’ (1.3.36); by implication, the money comes from trade, not landed gentry. The term was used of a deer with its first antlers, hence a person newly ennobled (OED, 6b).
58 in court at the royal court, not in the law court.
60 viscountess Crude punning on ‘vice’ and ‘cunt’: see 2.5.76–8 (Ostovich, 1994, 429–30; and Happé). Depending on the physical presentation of Placentia’s distended belly, the audience will already see her in such terms.
60–1 carry . . . her move with irrestistible force, carrying away or propelling everything in her course (OED, 6). The expression also comments ironically on her swollen belly.
61 her, as we say;  . . . usher,] this edn; her (as wee say) . . . usher: F2
61 gentleman-usher gentleman acting as an attendant to a person of superior rank.
62 cast-off released, let loose, as a boat from its mooring, or hunting hounds from their couplings.
62 bare bare-headed, or putting off their caps, as a sign of deference (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
65 Could permit her niece to take precedence, or show off her superior rank to her aunt. Lady Loadstone is the widow of a knight (see 2.4.11); Placentia would be the wife of a viscount, a step up in rank from gentlewoman to noblewoman, and thus entitled to take a position before or above her aunt. Polish resolves this social problem at lines 67–70 by suggesting that Lady Loadstone marry a count to maintain her superior status in the family.
66 consult . . . ambition consider my own intentions regarding my future status: a dry and equivocal comment.
67 zealous ardent, fanatically devoted, usually applied to puritan believers. Lady Loadstone may mean ‘over-zealous’, too earnestly interfering in her mistress’s concerns.
70 Has . . . certain Who has my vote for sure; who certainly has my approbation.
70 O fine courtier! Echo of Fallace’s swooning admiration for her would-be courtly lover Brisk: see Ostovich, EMO, 4.1.29ff. and notes.
71 bravery gallant; fine figure of a man (OED, 5).
71 pricked out See 2.2.10 and note, but with a bawdy innuendo of sexual excitement.
73 at large (1) recognized abroad in society generally; (2) nautically, in the open sea; (3) bawdy innuendo with ‘countess’: sexually available.
73 large!] F2 state 2; large state 1
2.4 ] F2 (Act II. Scene IIII.)
0 SD] this edn; To them. in right margin. / Diaphanous. Palate. centred below, F2
2.4 2 friend in court patron or influential advocate. Proverbially, ‘Better is a friend in court than a penny in purse’ (Dent, F687, and Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); cf. 4.3.46.
2 command have at your disposal for the asking.
3 errand expedition or mission (OED, 2a).
4 church preferment advancement within the church; ecclesiastical appointment.
6 study examine in detail, investigate thoroughly.
7 work work on.
9 all in all the most influential of all her friends; all-powerful.
10 fly Compass card in a mariner’s compass, connected, with the compass needle above it, to the loadstone by means of a pin, which allows the card and the needle to move freely in response to the magnetic pull, thus indicating direction. See Ostovich (1994).
12 prizes vessels captured in war or through piracy.
15 employs consults as an instument to guide her; relies on for professional services.
15 Dominus Domine, or Lord; used in respectful address to members of the clergy or the learned professions.
16 yet currently, heretofore.
17 a trick . . . awry a way to upset his expectations.
17 awry,] Wh; awry: F2
18 confessed An equivocal term when used by a parson, even though confession is not a Protestant sacrament: ‘The Church of England, howsoever it holdeth not Confession and Absolution Sacramental that is made unto and received from a Priest to be so absolutely necessary, as without it there can be no remission of sins, yet . . . it is manifest what she teacheth concerning the virtue and force of this sacred action’; i.e. that confession is ‘special’ and absolution ‘the same as that which the ancient church and the church of Rome useth’ (Cosin, quoted in More and Cross, 1935, 515).
21 Secure . . . rivalship Be assured that you have no serious rival.
23 Waits . . . more That awaits you as a further reward.
23 Accost (1) Approach and address; (2) nautically, lie alongside, keep close; sail along the coast of. See TN, 1.3.46–7, for a similar use in wooing.
24 move urge, influence; propose the match to.
25 morsel gift, or bribe, to smooth the way to the girl; little piece of the action, to sweeten her attitude and ensure her support.
26 toy trinket.
30 coin make money out of (OED, v.1 2c).
31 SD] not in F2; but see 2.5.0
33 oracle prophet, seer; source of knowledge influencing decisions.
33 family!] F2 state 2; family? State 1 (some copies)
34 nick it with catch, seize, take advantage of this opportunity (OED, 7b, although the first citation is 1634); (2) win against other players; gamble on a throw of the dice, as in the game of hazard, to win (OED, 9, 10).
35 hearken . . . go hear (or overhear) what the current opinions are.
35 SD] this edn; not in F2
2 0] no SD, this edn; To them. in right margin / Compasse. centred below, F2
2.5 ] F2 (Act II. Scene V.)
2.5 2 hid . . . state state secret.
3 of counsel in one another’s confidence, privy to the same information as a body of advisers (OED, 6); see 54 below. The repetition of the homophones ‘counsel’ and ‘council’ set up buried references to the Council of Placentia, ad 1095; see 5.2.10n.
4 dealt presented himself; treated diplomatically, furthering the idea of ‘state’ negotiations.
6 overture opening gambit in the marriage negotiations.
7 trusted entrusted.
8 syllabes syllables. Jonson’s usual spelling, as in Grammar and in Und. 70, 63.
8 syllabes] F2 (Sillabes); Syllables F3
9 Except where I forgot your exact delicacy of phrasing.
10 enlarged expanded on, discussed more fully. Compass gives the details of his talk with Practice, 11–30 below.
11 homely plain. Jonson was an advocate of the ‘plain style’ of writing, based on Horatian precedent: direct, succinct, and unadorned by extended metaphor or description.
13 free liberal.
14 ends . .  ulterior motives.
15 mere (1) sole, independently exercised (OED, 2, used in legal phrasing); (2) absolute, perfect, downright (OED, 4).
15 value of it worth and consequence of this proposed match with Placentia.
16 call . . . kindred include him in your extended family or clan.
16 veins bloodline.
16 veins,] F2 state 2; veines state 1
17 family immediate household.
20 calling professional training (as a lawyer).
21 maturity mature consideration, due deliberation (OED, 1).
22 Gratitude as generous as Lady Loadstone’s gracious offer had been.
25 stood with (1) nautically, sailed in the same direction as (another ship) (OED, 79d); (2) were consistent with, or went along with, side by side (see OED, 79e and f); (3) possibly, stood in the balance with; that is, Lady Loadstone’s advantageous terms had to be weighed against Practice’s choice or chance for his future, which, as he goes on to say, rests with another girl.
27 ingenious noble; honest and frank (OED, 4, frequently used for ingenuous).
27 leave, permission that. The comma indicates omission.
28 love friendship, goodwill.
28 that with which.
30 Being as Since.
32 He did . . . did not i.e. He said the same to me, but did not name the girl.
33 amphibolies ambiguous discourse, quibbles juggling two distinct meanings.
37 Stint Stop, be quiet.
37 fond foolish; mad.
38 SD.2] F2 (in right margin)
40 fables invents.
42 under seal in confidence or secrecy; used of the seal of confession or the confessional (OED, n.2 2b). Cf. 2.4.18n.
44 He . . . mad? Lady Loadstone may be expressing doubt about Practice’s sanity in refusing to marry an heiress; or she may be surprised at Practice’s probity in selecting and sticking to a virtuous and intelligent partner, even though she apparently has no fortune (she is also Compass’s choice: see 47–8 below).
44 mad?] this edn; mad. F2
45 her Polish, the mother.
45 trouble interfere with, disturb.
45–6 hold . . . wing have the prospect of listening to a lot of squeaking and chirping about the house; proverbial (Dent, G425 ‘To hold a grasshopper by the wing’). H&S cite ‘fill every ear with noise’, Poet., Apol. Dial., 101. Also see Volp., 3.4.40.
47 your mistress Pleasance, whom Compass wishes to marry.
48 where . . . wrings where the shoe pinches, where your sensitive spot is. Cf. Tilley, M129: ‘Every man knows best where the shoe wrings.’
49 look . . . there beware of or take care of him as your rival.
49 SD] not in F2 ; but see 2.6.0
51 bargain negotiated transaction, ‘done deal’; a doublet with ‘sale’.
52 close . . . heads putting their heads together in confidential discussion.
53 in counsel in private.
53 counsel] F2 (Councell)
54 counsel] F2 (Councell)
55 speak . . . fee argue for the side that retains him.
57 exception legal objection that limits or bars an opponent’s court action because of countervailing rights or insufficent evidence (OED, 4).
58–9 He . . . form He must not put his natural inclinations (to family or anything else) ahead of scrupulous adherence to legal procedures (OED, Form n.11).
60 for us on our side.
63 scrupulous too painstaking or particular about the choice.
64 he Sir Moth Interest.
64 geld it (1) deprive it of some essential part, cut down its resources, thus keeping a significant part of the dowry for himself; (2) castrate or spay it (metaphorically, since a sum of money is in question); (3) pay geld, punning on the tax paid by English landowners to the crown before the Norman Conquest, and then continued by the Norman kings.
64 geld] F2 (gueld)
65 It . . . him If Sir Moth keeps part of the dowry now, that theft will substantiate the lawsuit against Sir Moth later.
65 him. Somewhat,] this edn; him: somewhat, F2
65 Somewhat To some extent; in a certain measure (OED, B)
66 A bird in the hand is better than two in the bush. Proverbial (Dent, B363).
68 If you can refrain from signing any form of release.
68, 75, 78 SDs] G; not in F2
70 she Placentia.
71 East Indian fleets Merchant vessels of the East India Company, established as an English monopoly in 1600 to challenge the Dutch–Portuguese control of the spice trade. With the local Indian rulers’ approval, the East India Company gradually expanded trading from spices to cottons, silks, and indigo, and by the end of the century to tea. Coffee was abandoned as a market, because it was already cornered by the French and the Dutch.
74 Six . . . years? Diaphanous is surprised because the voyages, although more frequent later, at first occurred once every two years, and the return of a ship was an event (H&S).
77–8 chair . . . bed Quibble on sexual positions.
78 bird maiden, girl (OED, 1d).
2.6 ] F2 (Act II. Scene VI.)
1 0]no SD, this edn; Interest. Practise. Bias. Compasse. Palate. Rut. / Ironside. / To them. in right margin F2 state 2; Interest. Practise. Bias. Compasse. Palate. Rnt. / Ironside. / To them. in right margin F2 state 1
2.6 2 off off the list of prospective husbands, thus leaving Bias ‘on’ in a stronger position.
6 To the relation To witness the financial report.
7 for as for.
8 those that those, i.e. the profits.
9 watch watchfulness.
11 awake wakeful, tense.
12 knew to use knew how to invest.
13 my industry my business, what I do for a living.
16–22 the contract . . . conditions The contract which Interest makes with Bias is for £6,000 less than the full dowry of £16,000, on the basis that Bias is only a younger son and would not have expected a bride with a large portion. Placentia is more or less in the same position as Grace in Bart. Fair: as a ward, Placentia may refuse the match, or marry another by her own choice, but then she would have to pay financial amends to her uncle. She loses money in any case by the current arrangement, but this is what Lady Loadstone has asked Compass to help prevent.
17 this gentleman Bias.
17 pound –] this edn; pound. F2
19 rib Eve, in the Bible, was fashioned from Adam’s rib (Genesis, 2.21).
20 Whom he can shape as he pleases, like imprinting wax with a seal (cf. MND, 1.1.47–51).
21 more] F2 state 2; more, state 1
22 An If.
23 sale in open] F2 state 2; in open sale, state 1
24 o’the by on the side.
25 To appear To make a good appearance.
26 deduced upo’ deducted from.
27 Draw up this Write up this contract.
30 stock dowry (OED, 48c).
30 principal The principal of £16,000 would double twice at 10 per cent – ‘ten i’the hundred’ (34) – in fourteen years to approximately £64,000. If Placentia were born in 1617, however, then the rate would have been 10 per cent for the first seven years, and only 8 per cent for the next seven, since the rate of interest was lowered in 1624 (cf. Owls, 166–79, and Staple, 2.1.4–5). Nevertheless, the profit by 1632 would roughly fit Practice’s rapid calculation: if Sir Moth then pays out £10,000 as the marriage portion (17), keeping £6,000 for himself, he is left with £54,000 + £6,000 = £60,000 – ‘threescore thousand got in fourteen year’ (33). New mathematics books with charts for figuring interest make the numbers easier to work out; see Introduction.
36 clamour outcry.
36 envy malicious comments, scandal.
38 Their complaints cannot raise welts like a whiplash on the skin. That is, mere words can’t hurt me.
41 love of money Thus reversing the biblical statement: ‘The love of money is the root of all evil’ (1 Timothy, 6.10, AV).
43 befit be suitable for.
44–5 The periods at the end of these lines emphasize Sir Moth’s refusal to hear a countering comment; he is speaking with finality.
44 assertion.] this edn; Assertion. . F2; the second period is a printer’s error
47 look for observe (OED, 15c).
48 secular worldly, non-religious or non-ecclesiastical (cued by ‘confess’, 46).
48 lay non-clerical, unlearned, or non-professional (OED, adj. 3).
49 commonplace topic of a sermon or discourse (expressed above at 41–2). Sir Moth’s sermon on the love of money rests on eight points, which he argues in 50–101 below.
50 First Sir Moth’s first point is that the human soul desires the infinite, whether in knowledge, honour, or wealth.
51 I’ what] H&S; I what F2
51 covets desires, lusts after. The use of this term inverts the biblical injunction, ‘Thou shalt not covet . . .’ (Exodus, 20.17), by using it as the positive first stage that defines the human condition.
53 infinitely.] F3; infinitely, F2
55 infinite wealth Possibly a Marlovian echo (‘infinite riches in a little room’, . .  Jew of Malta, 1.1.37). See line 62 below.
56 lying (1) tending, inclining; (2) telling falsehoods (Interest does not pick up this meaning).
56 Next The second point is that everyone has hope of gaining infinite wealth because the world is constantly reproducing and expanding.
59 dispersèd scattered.
59 issue (1) progeny; products, or profits (OED, 6, 7); (2) consequence (OED, 10).
59 the first one the original, perhaps prelapsarian, world; before the flood (Whalley).
59 the first] H&S; first F2
60 I not see I do not see. The non-periphrastic construction of a negative statement was common in the sixteenth century (Partridge, 1953b, 9).
62 himself –] this edn; himself. F2
63 burden (1) refrain or repeated chorus of a song; see 70 below; (2) child in the womb (OED, 4), punning on ‘issue’ (59).
64 Thirdly The third point is that a ruler needs wealthy men many times more than soldiers, in order to obtain infinite power.
64–5 member . . . politic subject or citizen.
68 There’s where you differ from us. That is, Interest is wealthy; Compass is the only one currently onstage with military experience.
70 It . . . all It must be true of that which produces, frames, or accounts for everything else.
70 all –] this edn; all. F2
71 Fourthly The fourth point is that all loyal subjects must love money because the sovereign’s picture is stamped on every coin.
71 natural (1) consistent with or proper to human nature; (2) foolish.
72 set a price fix a value; literally mark a coin with a number setting its worth.
73 mistress’ picture] Wh; Mrs. Picture F2
74 hieroglyphic sacred symbol, emblem (hieroglyphikes, mystical writing, Gr.). Cf. King’s Ent., 203–4; Blackness, 221–2.
75 sculpture engraving.
76 manifest obvious.
77 Fifthly The fifth point is that wealth empowers the merchant class.
77 Fifthly] F2 (Fiftly)
78 conventions public assemblies or meetings.
78–9 displaceth . . . parties replaces merit with general permissiveness, or licence to speak, granted to everyone (that is, everyone with money). The statement implies a specifically political meaning: ‘Money talks.’
80 take the wall take the inner and safer position on the street (OED, Wall 16a and b). As in the previous statement, trade is privileged over virtue.
81 mere . . . shop pure, unmixed offspring of a shopkeeper.
81 right honourable (1) properly worthy of respect; (2) worthy of being addressed as Right Honourable, a courtesy title extended to peers below the rank of marquess, to privy councillors, and to certain civil functionaries like the lord mayors of London; sometimes to sons and daughters of peers holding courtesy titles (OED, 2b). Cf ‘right worshipful’, 1.4.20; and Massinger, A New Way to Pay Old Debts (1626), 2.1.76, in a context of wealth outweighing birth.
82 Sixthly The sixth point is that wealth enables perfect freedom of choice in action, and perfect self-knowledge, since a man cannot hide behind pious hypocrisies about what he would do if he could. Wealth enables him to do anything he chooses, and choosing not to do something tells him about his own moral character.
82 Sixthly] F2 (Sixtly)
83 real (1) royal, kingly; (2) concretely existing as facts; (3) pertaining to current coin or cash in hand.
84 Referring . . . still Consulting only his own interests or profit.
85 without him beyond himself, or away from his own material interests.
87 be he rich if he be rich.
90 Where Whereas.
90 knave ordinary man in the street, not implying base or dishonest qualities.
92 Seventhly The seventh point is that intelligent men end up working for the rich, using their educated brains to benefit their patrons, and parasitically feeding off their wealth. The implication is that the rich are more meritorious and respectable.
94 serve . . . them act as rich employers require them to act; perform for mutual advantage.
95 others’] G; others F2
96 gentlemen . . . bawds Contradictory terms that frustrate the ambitions of the ‘wise’: each pairing indicates the upwardly mobile aspiration (gentlemen, squire) and the downwardly spiralling fact of their existence (parasites, bawds).
98 Eighthly The final point is that wealth will benefit those who inherit it, but that intelligence is not so certain a legacy.
98 Eighthly] F2 (Eightly)
99 or . . . or either . . . or.
100 H&S point to Jonson’s quotation of a Spanish saying: ‘The arts cannot be distributed among the heirs’ (Discoveries, 251–2).
100 legacy] G; Legacie? state 1; Legacie, state 2 F2
101 harington brass farthing, coined by John, Lord Harington, under a patent granted him by James I in 1613. See also 4.8.74–5.
102 entail . . . house make his descendants or household a perpetual laughing-stock.
102 entail (1) attach as an inseparable appendage to an estate; (2) impose an unpleasant consequence (OED, 4).
102 SD] Wh; in left margin, lines 101–2 F2
103–4 Or . . . him Or become a laughing-stock himself to his own descendants.
103 tale Punning on (1) entail; (2) scandalous story.
106 mere absolutely, downright, in a reductive sense (OED, a.2 Ⅱ, 4).
106 heterogene (1) diverse, of completely different characters; incongruous or anomalous, even foreign; (2) mathematically, of different kinds, so as to be incommensurable. Jonson used the term scientifically in Alch., 2.5.11.
108 Mohammedans] F2 (Mahumetans)
109–10 Is’t . . . for? Is it so important to you to know more about religions than what your own side believes in?
111 Yes . . . eat Unlike Shylock, who transacts business with Christians, but refuses to dine with them (MV, 1.3.32–3), Ironside is willing to dine with those of different faiths, but wants to know what they believe, so that he can argue with them over dinner.
111 dispute get into a discussion, or debate.
115–16 Here’s . . . of In this house there is no guest important or rich enough to have brought his own servant, who might pass on information about the master.
116 T’inquire] F2 (To’inquire)
117 buzzed rumoured (OED, 5).
117 brace pair, used contemptuously of people; cf. ‘A fool and a physician’ (118 below), meaning Palate and Rut. The term was originally used of dogs coupled for hunting.
121 Moth,] G; Moath! F2
122 animadverting criticizing, fault-finding (cited second in OED).
123 his] F3; his his F2
124 him, you him that you.
125 pernicious destructive, ruinous.
126 pestilent fatally destructive, diseased, infectious (with plague).
126 meanly (1) in no slight degree; (2) poorly; perhaps, in a particularly low or despicable manner.
126–7 affected / Unto (1) infected, attacked like a disease (OED, Affect, v.2 1), clearly implying treachery; (2) generally, inclined or disposed towards (Happé).
129 jealousies suspicions (OED, 5).
130 cross thwart.
130 endeavours businesses, or efforts to get ahead professionally.
132 Cutting . . . whispering Causing murder by malicious gossip, as in Sej., 1.30–1: ‘cut / Men’s throats with whisp’rings’; ultimately from Juvenal, Satires, 4.110 (H&S).
132 penknife Implying that the sharp slur may be written rather than whispered, as in poison-pen rumours.
132 SD] this edn; not in F2
133 his Bias’s.
133 I’m] F2 (I’am)
135 profess proclaim openly.
136 rascal rogue, unprincipled dishonest fellow.
137 offence (1) moral stumbling-block (OED, 2); (2) disgrace, offensive to others (OED, 5d).
140 Entreat (1) Enter into negotiations, in a diplomatic sense, used ironically here (OED, 4); (2) persuade by pleading special circumstances (OED, 10).
141 have at you get ready to fight.
143 consort company. Punning on a band of musicians.
143 fiddlers triflers.
144 Pragmatic Officiously busy in other people’s affairs, interfering (OED, 2).
144 flies insects; but see 2.4.10 and note.
144 publicans heathens (OED, 1b); originally, tax gatherers.
145 adopted See ‘called so twenty year’ (3.3.50).
146 ’Best It were best. See textual note: Jonson used an apostrophe to indicate colloquial omission.
146 Best] this edn; ’Best F2
146 raise the house call out for help in the household.
146 secure us make us safe.
146 us –] this edn; us; F2
147 blades in belts A sword was worn in a scabbard suspended from the belt by a ‘hanger’ or loop.
148 shop office.
149 bundles rolls of official documents.
150 cimici bugs (It.).
152 passage exchange of blows, here only threatened (see Cynthia (F), 5.2.54); or verbal altercation (OED, 13c).
153 fee-simple estate belonging to the owner and his heirs forever unconditionally; absolute possession.
156–7 disfurnished . . . provisions divested or cleared by the household servants of the food put out for dinner.
158 covey family, party; originally, brood of game birds.
159 SD.1 [Enter] pleasance] G; not in F2, but see 2.7.0
159 SD.2 Exeunt . . . together] this edn; not in F2
2.7 ] F2 (Act II. Scene VII.)
0 no SD, Wilkes; Compasse. Pleasance. F2
2.7 2 suits in law (1) lawsuits; (2) suitors in the legal profession. Compass’s legal puns continue into his next speech.
3 briefly (1) in a short statement; (2) in a summary of the facts of the case, with reference to the points of laws applicable to them; usually drawn up for the instruction of counsel conducting the case.
4 retained engaged a barrister by giving a preliminary fee to secure his services for one’s own cause, if necessary (OED, 4); engaged to marry a lawyer by giving some token.
4 brisk smartly dressed; gallant.
5 joined united, implying in marriage; entered into a contract.
6 patentee One to whom something has been officially granted, usually some proprietary right (OED, 1c).
9 right Standard of permitted and forbidden action in a certain sphere; claim or title of proper possession; legal enjoyment of privileges. Compass seems particularly concerned about Pleasance’s control over her own body, her chastity, as subsequent wordplay indicates.
9 acquaint become familiar with. Punning on ‘quaint’, vagina.
10 common dealing in the common law. But glancing at consorting with a common prostitute, like Dol Common in Alch.
10 case law case; but also vagina.
11 gap opening or hole; vagina.
11 leap Brothels were also known as leaping-houses.
12, 14 SD] G; not in F2
12 riddle enigmatic, dark, or puzzling statement.
13 love-trick strategy to attract or claim a lover. Pleasance recognizes Compass’s anxiety as a possible symptom of his love for her.
14 study (1) debate with myself about; wonder at (OED, 2d and e); (2) examine in detail in order to understand (OED, 10).
Chorus 2 ] this edn; Chorus. F2
Chorus 2 1–2 Damplay’s questions about personal or particular satire echo statements in Jonson’s earlier plays. Asper warns his audience, ‘If any here chance to behold himself, / Let him not dare to challenge me of wrong, / For if he shame to have his follies known, / First he should shame to act ’em’ (EMO, Ind., 139–42). Similarly, in Volp., he dares his readers to discover ‘Where have I been particular? Where personal, except to a mimic, cheater, bawd, or buffoon – creatures for their insolencies worthy to be taxed?’ (The Epistle, 42–4).
2 personate represent.
2 perstringe censure, take to task (perstringo, –ere, Lat.).
3–13 These lines echo the final item of the contract in Bart. Fair, warning against ‘any state-decipherer or politic picklock of the scene so solemnly ridiculous as to search out who was meant by the gingerbread-woman, who by the hobbyhorse-man, who by the costermonger, nay, who by their wares’ (Ind., 103–5).
3 mate companion or associate.
5 invented for laughter made up as a joke.
6 professors those who profess or claim a skill; cf. Poet., Apol. Dial., 125–7 (H&S), and Volp., The Epistle, 8.
8 Iniquity Wickedness, sin; traditional name for the Vice in the interludes, and used by Shakespeare and Jonson. See Happé, Devil, 1.1.41–3n.
10 apparel clothe, dress in costume.
10–11 vices . . . persons Another protest denying particular satire, as in Poet., 3.5.133–4, defining the poet’s work as: ‘modest rhymes / That spare men’s persons and but tax their crimes’ and Apol. Dial., 70–2, echoing Martial, 10.33.10.
12 Davus A slave in Terence’s Andria.
12 Pseudolus Eponymous hero, ‘the Liar’, in Plautus’s play.
12 Pyrgopolinices A braggart in Plautus’s The Braggart Soldier (Miles Gloriosus).
13 Thraso A soldier in Terence’s The Eunuch (Eunuchus).
13 Euclio The miser in Plautus’s The Pot of Gold (Aulularia).
13 Menedemus In Terence’s The Self-Tormentor (Heutontimorumenos).
15 Titius . . . Stile Fictitious names (like John Doe) used in law cases. Roman law referred to Gaius Seius and Lucius Titius: Juvenal used Deius and Titius of ‘any ordinary men’ in Satires, 4.13; Martial has Gaius and Lucius, 5.14.5. The English equivalents used here are John from the Oak, and John from the Stile.
15 Stile] F2 (Style)
16 taxable to liable to a charge or accusation in.
19 fancy imagine.
19 fancy] this edn; phant’sie F2
20 publishing broadcasting or disseminating to the public.
20 utter offer or announce in public; put into circulation (used of counterfeit money).
21–2 you . . . comedy you turn his play into a false and defamatory statement. See next note.
23 prologue ‘They make a libel which he made a play’ (Epicene, Second Prol., 14).
24 reprehensible deserving of blame.
24 reprehension rebuke.
27 solemn humourless, grave, earnest.
27 vice of interpretation evil of misinterpreting; twisting or bending of meaning (see 23n). H&S cite Staple, 2.Intermean, 21, on misrepresenting Pecunia: ‘Take heed it lie not in the vice of your interpretation.’ Cordatus comments on scenes ‘racked by some hard construction’, pulling and stretching meaning out of shape, action he blames on ‘these narrow-eyed decipherers . . . that will extort strange and abstruse meanings out of any subject’ (EMO, 2.3.327 and 348–50).
28 drawing it awry (1) pulling it out of shape, as on a rack; (2) making an inaccurate picture.
28 civil (1) civilized, polite; (2) public, as pertaining to citizens; (3) in law, distinguished from ‘criminal’; pertaining to members of a community and the legal means of settling their disputes.
28 murder Similar to Jonson’s commendatory line on The Faithful Shepherdess (1608), 14, telling Fletcher to see ‘thy murdered poem’ as martyred and bound for glory, invisible to the foolish spectators who rejected the play (3.372, line 14).
29 vively vividly, clearly (cited in OED, 2). Cf. New Inn, Argument, 54.
29–31 glass . . . manners The idea of comedy as a mirror of ordinary life, attributed to Cicero, was voiced more fully in EMO: ‘imitatio vitae, speculum consuetudinis, imago veritatis: a thing throughout pleasant and ridiculous, and accommodated to the correction of manners’ (3.1.415–17).
32 delight or profit Derived from Horace, Ars Poetica, 343–4, which Jonson translated: ‘As doctrine and delight together go’. Jonson referred to this critical principle frequently, as in EMO, Ind., 200; Volp., Prol. 7; Epicene, Second Prol. 1–2; Alch., Prol. 15–16.
33 malice of misapplying Cf. ‘sinister application / Of the malicious, ignorant, and base / Interpreter’ (Poet., 5.3.120–2). Happé notes Jonson’s source as Martial, 1 Prol. 9–10.
34 by his calumny by calumniating him (H&S).
34 his calumny] F2; this calumny Wh
36 in about, on the topic of.
37 up] this edn; up, F2
38 detract others disparage or speak damagingly of others (OED, 3).
39 signature distinctive mark (OED, 4).
39–40 no barber’s art Playing on ‘barbarism’. Cinnamus, the barber (Martial, 6.44.24–6), was credited with removing stains and brands; Jonson refers to him by name in the last sentence of the Epistle in Volp. Barbers and surgeons belonged to the same guild, and had the same training.
40 balls i.e. of soap. Cf. Epicene, 3.5.59–60: during the cursing of Cutbeard, the barber, Truewit suggests ‘if he would swallow all his balls for pills, let not them purge him’. Soap was apparently ingested as an emetic.
40 expunge cleanse, purge.
41–3 Similarly, in Bart. Fair, Ind., 66–8, 73–5, 97–100, arguing that a spectator can only criticize the play according to the price of his ticket; the less he spends, the less he is allowed to say. See 45–51 below.
41 empire absolute rule. Jonson associates this word with tyranny in Devil, 3.3.45.
42 entitle . . . to authorize . . . to have.
44 to purpose to the matter at hand, to the point.
44 in place in its proper place, appropriate or timely.
48 ten] F2 state 2; ten, state 1
50 to cry up or down to praise or criticize publicly. Cf. Epicene, 1.1.61–2.
51 by confederacy as an aggressive group. Cf. the jeerers in Staple.
53 science intellect, knowledge; from scientia (Lat.).
54 bears bear-baiting.
55 puppets Puppets, or motions, aroused Jonson’s contempt in Discoveries, 442, and in EMO (where they were the favourite pastime of Sogliardo; cf. 2.2.201–2), but he used them to expose fools in Bart. Fair, 5.4.
55 popular characteristic of the common people.
56 apparelled dressed; furnished, equipped.
56 hard-handed and stiff Physical characteristics of working-men.
57 trowel- or a hammer-man bricklayer or carpenter, perhaps blacksmith. Jonson himself was apprenticed to a bricklayer in his youth, and resented it still in 1632 (cf. Gil’s lampoon, Literary Record, Electronic Edition, lines 52 and 58).
57 trowel-] this edn; Trewel, F2
59 damplay . . . boy?] F2 state 2; after ore (i.e. o’er) not on a separate line in state 1
60 No . . . silence Not by any particular person, but by everyone’s neglect and silence.
61 second supporter.
64 epitasis See Chorus 1, 1–8 and notes.
3.1 2 ’pothecary apothecary, who prepares and sells drugs for medicinal purposes; now druggist, pharmacist, or chemist. In 1617, the Apothecaries’ Company of London separated from the Grocers’ Company, and became more specialized; since 1700, they have had legal status as general medical practitioners.
3.1 ] F2 (Act III. Scene I.)
0 SD] this edn; Item. Needle. Keepe. Pleasance. F2
0 SH item] F2 state 2; Iem state 1
2 ’pothecary] this edn; Pothecary F2
3 within offstage. Much of this act’s action happens in another room of Lady Loadstone’s house, and is either reported onstage by observers, or heard by the audience as noises off (as at 33 SD and ff. at the end of this scene).
5–6 Why . . . meat? The concentration on meals as a measure of the man who eats them is a frequent theme in Jonson’s plays. See Carlo’s discourse on pork in EMO, 5.3.126–37; or Mammon’s descriptions of aphrodisiac dinners in Alch., 4.1.155–69.
6 twenty millions i.e. twenty million businesses.
8 news The early modern newspaper or scandal-sheet is the topic of Staple, in which types of news are listed at 1.5.2–21. The question ‘What news?’ frequently opened up jigs or satiric skits on current events; see Baskervill (1965), 59–63.
8 points o’the compass directional points indicated by the magnetized needle on the card of a mariner’s compass.
9 sublunary existing beneath the moon; belonging to this world (cited in OED, 2). The word choice connects obliquely to the mariner’s compass, since shipping depends on tides, controlled by the moon.
10 times news, state of affairs; or travel information in terms of distance and weather, from temps, Fr. (OED, 13c). Proverbially, ‘Time and tide wait for no man’ (Dent, T323).
10 double times (1) twice as much news, intensifying the quality or quantity available; (2) duplicitous or double-dealing actions; scandals.
11 furnish forth provide (OED, 8).
12 Deserve your dinner Merit or earn your meal by retailing the latest gossip. This retailing of idle, often malicious chatter is usually the function of a parasite, like Carlo in EMO. See next note.
12 Sow out Scatter, as in seeding a field. Jonson uses the same expression in Epigr. 115, in which the dinner guest ‘has a gathered deal / Of news and noise, to sow out a long meal’ (9–10).
13 SD] this edn; not in F2
13 out quarrelling, fallen out.
14 pieced patched up, punning on ‘peaced’, a tailor’s joke. Needle has a sharp wit, as the rest of his speech indicates.
15 high (1) rich in flavour, luxurious (OED, 8); (2) excited with drink, intoxicated (OED, 16b), as at 18–19 below; (3) at the fullest, punning on high tide.
16 edifying providing moral enlightenment, a puritan cant-term (cf. Alch., 3.1.45 and Bart. Fair, 1.6.32), here applied to appetite.
16 stomach (1) appetite or relish for food (OED, 5); (2) figuratively, temper or disposition (OED, 7). Zeal-of-the-Land Busy in Bart. Fair shows the same combination of greed for food and disposition to convert others.
17 persuading convincing, leading to believe; implying puritan conversion, but here applied to winning over the taste buds.
18 sack Generally, sweet white (usually Spanish) wine, preferred by English drinkers.
18–19 in . . . uses] all italics in F2
18–19 doctrines . . . uses Puritan discourse: doctrines are dogma or tenets of the church; uses are customary forms of religious observance or service. See Introduction, for satire.
20 him?] Wh; him. F2
20 recusant Historically, a Roman Catholic who refused to attend the services of the Church of England; later, also applied to a dissenting Protestant. Here Diaphanous refuses sack in favour of French wine. Accused of recusancy in Jan. 1606 after the Gunpowder Plot, Jonson was fined for non-attendance at his parish church until he converted back to the Church of England in 1610.
22 allay dilution (OED, 7). Happé cites ‘hot wine with not a drop of allaying Tiber in’t’, Cor., 2.1.39.
20 SD] G; not in F2
23 a month’s mind (1) an intention, ‘a good mind’ to do something, from the commemorative mass one month after death, but used playfully here (OED, Mind, 5b); (2) a design, or plan, from the period when the lying-in mother was left by the monthly nurse. The medical month was the period of 26 days, 22 hours, formerly supposed by physicians to represent the interval between crises of a disease or condition (OED, Month, 3f and 4).
25 set seated.
25 board’s end head of the table.
26 mistress Placentia.
28 For thrusting Giving him first opportunity to stab at the platters of food with his knife, an implication of improper or greedy table manners (OED, 5, 7b).
28 ’gainst against, directly opposite. In the description that follows, Needle describes Lady Loadstone at the head of the table, sharing that place with Placentia; the others are mentioned in facing pairs down the table: Palate on the Lady’s right, opposite Polish on the left (Placentia is thus between the two women); Sir Diaphanous opposite Sir Moth; Ironside opposite Practice; Rut opposite Bias, and Compass at the foot of the table with a clear view of all. Pleasance is not seated at the table, but may be serving Lady Loadstone.
32 pert (1) expert, skilled (OED, 3); (2) unbecomingly ready to express an opinion or give a sharp reply; often used as a vague expression of disfavour (OED, 4).
33 circumscribeth encompasses; defines or completes the circle.
33 SD A noise within.] F2, in left margin
35 mistress!] this edn; Mistris, F2
35 weapons are out swords are drawn; but sexually equivocal. Cf. Rom., 1.1.
36 Mischief of men! What evil men do! Possibly: ‘Curses on men!’
37 cellar case of bottles (OED, 4, cited first).
37 waters –] this edn; waters, F2
37 SD.1, 2] this edn; not in F2
3.2 0 SD To them after The SD suggests the careful timing of exits and entrances; the scenes are continuous. Keep and Pleasance may have some mute stage business expressing panic or offering each other comfort before exiting, perhaps concerned at being overheard by Item, or the men now entering. The pacing should be rapid.
3.2 ] F2 (Act III. Scene II.)
0 SD] this edn; To them after. in right margin. / Compasse. Ironside. centred below, F2
4 Court-Sir Ambergris Perfumed courtier–knight (expressing contempt for Sir Diaphanous). Ambergris, a waxy gray substance secreted by sperm whales, was used in making perfume and for flavouring food or drink (see line 6n. below).
5 braggart vain boaster.
6 amber ambergris, but sometimes confused with the resin of certain trees, from which oil of amber and spirit of amber were distilled and used in medicines (OED, 3).
7 break bruise or wound, by cutting open (OED, 5b; also 15, 18). See 12 below.
9 In orthodox In the customary or standard fashion.
9 gums resins, such as amber, used medically.
10 paynim pagan, exotic.
10 paynim] F2 (Panym)
15 SD.2] G, H&S, Wilkes, and Happé start a new scene
10 glass wineglass. Punning on (1) aid to vision, as an eye-glass or magnifying glass, to evaluate the situation; (2) crystal, or magic mirror, to see into the truth (OED, 8e).
11 balance apparatus for weighing, consisting of a beam poised to move freely on a central pivot, with a scale pan at each end.
11 justice The traditional figure of Justice is blindfolded (for impartiality), carrying balance scales (to weigh evidence) in one hand and a sword (to punish) in the other.
13 sanctuary place of refuge where an arrest might be avoided.
15 SD.1 Exeunt . . . Ironside] this edn; not in F2
15 SD.2–3] F2; Scene III. G; Act III. Scene III. H&S
16 This line begins a new scene in both H&S and Happé, but since the stage is not emptied, and overlapping action marks the whole scene, a scene-change seems unwarranted. Jonson, in any case, was careful about marking his own scenes.
16 rude violent (OED, 5).
17 fricace massage; technique used by midwives.
18 Keep Hold back.
18 tend attend to.
20 sweat fit of unnatural sweating (diaphoresis).
20 faint swooning.
21 Let . . . Tim Let Tim take care of her.
22, 24 SDs] G; not in F2
24 boisterous roughly behaved.
26 Rudhudibras Named after Rudhudibras, the early British king, grandfather of Leir, and mythical founder of Canterbury, Winchester, and Shaftesbury. Literally the name indicates strength of arms, mentioned in the context of ‘a long sword, / Blade Cornish’ in New Inn, 2.5.74–5. See Geoffrey of Monmouth’s Chronicle of the Early Britons, 1.9. The name recurs in Mag. Lady at 4.8.77 and 5.1.20.
26 de Particle indicating Norman gentlemanly ancestry; hence belonging to an old respected family dating back at least to 1066.
29 swaggering blustering, insolent, like a street bully.
31 far dangerously, regarding Placentia’s health.
33–4 Hippocrates . . . Averroes All medical practitioners. Hippocrates (460–350 bc) originated the humours theory; Galen (ad 130–200) expounded it in almost 500 treatises. Both were standard medical authorities up to the sixteenth century (cf. Volp., 2.2.103). Rasis, or Rhazes (ad 860–932) was a Persian physician who first established the difference between smallpox and measles; his works were widely published in Arabic and Gr., finally translated into Lat. in the fifteenth century. (Also in Tub, 4 Scene Interloping, 21.) Avicenna, more properly Ibn Sina (ad 980–1037), was an Arab physician and philosopher whose two most important works are The Book of Healing, a scientific encyclopaedia covering logic, natural sciences, psychology, geometry, astronomy, arithmetic, and music; and The Canon of Medicine, the most famous single book in the history of medicine before the modern era. Averroes, or Abul-Waleed Muhammad Ibn Rushd (ad 1128–98), wrote treatises on diagnostic and preventive medicine (Colliget, published in Lat. in 1552), as a result of his practice in Spain and Morrocco; he was also a philosopher and judge. Chaucer mentions these physicians in Gen. Prol., 431–3.
36 poor farthing bare coin, worth one-quarter of a penny; thus purchasing only a minute amount.
36 changed in exchanged for, spent on.
36 rosa solis A reviving drink. Literally, rose of the sun, Lat., it was a cordial originally made from the juice of the sundew plant (drosera). Later, brandy or other spirits were added. Cf. EMO, 4.5.98; and Chettle, Dekker, and Haughton, Patient Grissel, 4.2.203.
37 cinnamon aromatic spice used as a restorative in drinks.
37 SD] Happé, following G; not in F2
40 happyplex apoplexy, or stroke; ‘very dangerous disease, wherein a man lies, without sense or motion, as if he were dead, with his eyes closed, and great difficulty in fetching his breath: . . . A palsy or dead palsy’ (Blount, 1656, LEME). The broadly comic wordplay comments on Polish’s background and breeding; echoed as ‘happy place’ at 41 below.
41 happy place good thing. It would benefit Sir Moth’s soul, and make life easier for the rest of the household; this self-interested piety also comments satirically on Polish’s puritanism.
44 gi’en him gone presumed Sir Moth dead.
49 loss . . . name It is unclear whether Lady Loadstone refers to the revelation of Placentia’s pregnancy or to the violence that led to her brother’s collapse.
50 SD] G; not in F2
3.3 ] F2 (Act III. Scene III.); no scene change in G; Act III. Scene III. H&S
0 SD] this edn; Practice, Silkworme, Compasse. F2
3.3 2–6 Practice is ingratiating himself with a prospective client. The procedure he outlines here was current, but condemned in such publications as the anonymously written The Just Lawyer (1631), arguing that the law should be above bribery or other partial considerations: ‘And therefore the emblem of a judge was rightly portrayed with wide ears, but without any eyes at all; to denote that he ought fully and patiently to hear the whole cause but not affectionately to respect any party that hath to meddle therein’ (1–2).
3 reverend worthy of respect.
4 damages money awarded by the court in compensation for injury.
6 pack your jury select a jury in order to secure a partial decision (OED, v.2 4).
7 SH diaphanous] this edn; Silk. F2 and for remaining speech headings of 3.3
7–10 These complaints about injuries to fashionable clothing echo Fastidius Brisk’s duel in EMO, 4.3.312–52, esp. 335–6 (slashed doublet) and 345–8 (torn stockings).
9 spick and span particularly trim and smart, quite new and unworn. OED cites the phrase first in 1665, though the variant ‘speck and span’ occurs earlier in 1614, as does the longer expression ‘spick-and-span new’, in Bart. Fair, 3.5.33.
9-10 o’the . . . drawn on on the very first day the stockings were put on.
10 hose article of clothing for the thighs and loins, like breeches; not stockings covering feet and lower legs, already mentioned above.
11 Shrewd maims Perverse or malicious injuries; vexing or troubling offences (Florio, 1598, LEME). The more common expression for hurtful deeds is ‘shrewd turns’. . .  Maim usually ‘signifies a corporal hurt’ or amputation, and is legally actionable (Blount, 1656, and Rastell, 1579, LEME); thus Compass’s words convey ironic hyperbole. Cf. Truewit’s reprimand to Dauphine: ‘How! Maim a man forever for a jest? What a conscience hast thou?’ (Epicene, 4.5.107).
13 exact perfectly finished; absolutely exquisite (T. Thomas, 1587, LEME).
15 reckoned counted, mentioned.
16 defaced] F3; de defac’d F2
16 stigmatized marked with a stain (OED, 1b, first citation).
17 contumely insolent abuse, contemptuous treatment.
18 Beyond the capacity of our wisest laws to correct or compensate for.
19 challenge issue a formal invitation to a duel, usually put in writing; see 124–7 below.
19 advise consider (OED, 6).
21 of credit (1) for honour (OED, 5b); (2) for solvency, or the ability to be trusted with goods in expectation of future payment (OED, 9b). Courtiers were frequently in debt to their tailors, or to merchants who lent them money; Fastidius Brisk is jailed for such debts in EMO, 5.6.74-7.
22 Beside In consideration of, side by side with (OED, 1d).
23 He . . . Practice (At line 6 above.)
24 vowed to devoted to (OED,1b).
26 pure (1) perfect, not distracted by other interests; (2) in law, absolute, unconditional (OED, 2c).
26 apprentice at law Obsolete term for a barrister of less than sixteen years’ standing (OED, 2).
27 counsel . . . sword advice from a swordsman with experience in duelling. Counsel and action play on legal terms, although duelling, in fact, was illegal: see 30–4 below.
27–8 square . . . canons regulate your behaviour according to the standards or laws set for duelling matches – such as those explained by Vincentio Saviolo, a fencing master whose book on the Italian duel (1558) was translated into English as Vincentio Saviolo His Practice in 1595.
28 canons Usually referring to ecclesiastical law; punning on ‘cannons’ to expand wordplay on weapons.
30 law] this edn; law; F2
31 Nor scarce Nor even.
33 court above superior court. A breach of the peace (see 38 below) would normally be heard by a justice of peace or magistrate. Duelling was considered a serious crime, especially if it resulted in a death; for the Edict . . . against Private Combats and Duels, passed in 1614, see Happé, Devil, 3.3.64–6n. For the spiritual argument supporting the legal, see Despagne, Anti-Duello (1632): ‘Be it as it will, of all expedients which one can take, the duel is the worse. This way is practised by men barbarous and unnatural; it is casual and deceitful. It profanes the sacredness of justice. It overthrows universal maxims. It produceth no certainty. It puts in jeopardy the innocent, as well as the guilty. It tempts God many ways’ (G2v).
33 Star Chamber Room in Westminster Palace where the royal Council tried cases, so called for the stars painted on the ceiling. See also 3.5.140.
34 routs and riots tumults, uproars (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME), legal terms often paired together. A rout is an illegal assemblage of three or more persons proceeding to commit an unlawful act (OED, n.1 5b). A riot may be a spontaneous gathering ‘where three (at the least) or more do some unlawful act: as to beat a man, enter upon the possession of another, or such like’ (Rastell, Difficult and Obscure Words); or, depending on the ‘manner and circumstance of the doing’ (Lambard, Eirenarcha), it may be defined as a deliberate and premeditated act of violence by three or more persons, thus becoming a more serious offence. Neither term applies to Ironside as a lone assailant.
35 Although I would normally defer to your experience as a lawyer. The year has four legal terms during which courts are in session.
37–8 wild . . . haggard wild immature falcon that flies at any prey, even changing its target in mid-attack if distracted by an alternative quarry (H&S). A haggard falcon is by definition untamed, untrained, and young, just come into its adult plumage (OED, adj. 1).
38 fly at attack (OED, 8b).
39 amorous knight Mock-romantic tag for Sir Diaphanous; echoing Sir Amorous LaFoole in Epicene.
40 break . . . conscience Sardonic wordplay on ‘breach o’the peace’, suggesting that the knight is a conscientious objector to violence, but quibbling on legal infraction and cowardice.
41 friend second in a duel.
42 appoint of me settle on my behalf.
43 fair fair and square; in an equitable manner, according to the rules.
44 On even terms (1) Treating each swordsman equally, no odds favouring the better swordsman over the less skilled duellist. See 47ff. below against fighting on such terms. Even also has a mathematical sense here of balancing two equal parts; (2) for the purpose of getting even, having revenge as a point of honour. Compass argues both meanings when he sums up at 87–95.
45 And . . . you] parenthetical in F2
46 run go.
49 brother See 1.1.1n.
50 called so designated or addressed each other thus, claiming kinship out of friendship. Cf. ‘call cousins’ (OED, 17b).
51 allied with allies or relatives.
52 answer respond to a legal charge, either with a statement or by paying the penalty.
53 The worst success The worst result of victory in the duel, Ironside’s death.
54 Boy o’the sword Soldier; bully or thug. See Shift’s boasts of being a soldier and a highwayman, EMO, 3.1.370ff. and 4.3.219–20; and Kastril’s aspiration to be an Angry Boy in Alch., 3.4.18ff.
55–7 And there’s no exception to the fact that London juries make decisions based as much on the reputation of the accused as on legal testimony or affadavit. Cf. ‘Middlesex jury’, Happé, Devil, 1.1.21 and note.
60 ’Twixt] F2 (T’wixt)
61 beaver Originally, face-guard or visor of a helmet; here referring to the cavalier-hat worn by Royalist soldiers.
62 feather See 1.3.17n.
62 currier’s A currier was one who dressed and coloured leather after it had been tanned.
63 old Cordovan skins leftover remnants of Spanish leather from Cordoba.
63 Cordovan] F2 (Cordov’an)
64 mourn him in wear as a sign of mourning for him. Wills frequently stipulated gifts of rings, gloves, or other small items to be worn in memory of the dead.
66 votes prayers. OED, 2, cites the song in Fort. Isles (1626), 326.
68 fat bulky, full-bodied in the sense of being muscular or substantial (OED, 2, 3). So too in Alch., 4.3.28, where ‘too fat’ simply means ‘not ascetically thin’. Here, the meaning is tripled by the addition of two more adjectives of similar meaning intended to terrify Silkworm (68–9).
68 corpulent large or bulky.
69 Unwieldy Massive, awkwardly large, and thus difficult to manage (OED, 3).
69 dieted spark gallant with an elegant figure. Compass’s irony stresses Silkworm’s fashionable shape, rather than his athletic fitness for fighting. See 74–6.
72 less much less.
79 exacuate sharpen (OED, 1, first citation).
79 whet your choler hone or sharpen your anger. Choler, one of the four humours, was supposed to be the seat of anger.
80 an host an army (hostes, medieval Lat.).
83 great porter William Evans (d. 1636), porter to Charles I, was considered a giant at seven feet tall, but was not particularly fit. Knock-kneed and somewhat lame, he still managed to dance in an antimasque at court with Jeffrey the Dwarf in his pocket, to the amusement of the audience (H&S, citing Thomas Fuller, History of the Worthies, 1662, ‘Monmouthshire’, 54).
86 Abate Reduce or lessen.
87 All . . . taken All advice is only as good as what you make of it.
87–9 If . . . you If you insist on the chivalrous technicality of even terms in the duel, without having any odds (as at 44 above), then my argument has been to discourage you from fighting (because you will lose); if you intend to fight for reasons of reputation and reprisal, then my argument has given you support to continue (because then winning is irrelevant).
92 on either side in either case.
93 furnishing . . . matter giving you cause for being afraid.
95 resolution determination to persist (Florio, LEME), commitment.
97 apprehend understand.
98–9 perimeter . . . draughts about Geometrical terms indicating an appreciation for the thoroughness of Compass’s logic: its perimeter (measurement of the entire circumference) takes full account of the circle (figure of the circumference) created by the draughts (which outline or plot the figure) drawn about or around to define it. These terms also have nautical significance for navigating along the arc of a circle of the earth (OED, Circle n. 2b); Practice’s description applies to the use of the mariner’s compass.
106 Trust . . . much Don’t be over-confident.
107 I’m] F2 (I’am)
107–10 Do . . . reason Don’t allow your angry emotions to burst into a clamour of speech that overrules your reason. Metaphorically, Compass compares Silkworm’s emotions to a bell whose clapper jangles it in the wind, without the skill or rationale of a bell-ringer who plays music.
108 flatuous flatulent.
109 clapper tongue of a bell.
113–14 as furious . . . Achilles The wrathful Achilles returns to battle in The Iliad after his friend Patroclus is slain. H&S note that Jonson’s furious derives more from Horace than from Homer; cf. Ars Poetica, 121.
115 jot tiniest amount.
116–23 Well . . . meet Well, think about this carefully. An imaginary fight isn’t a real fight, but only a fight between shadows; shadows may borrow their shape, gesture, and action from observing the real stance and movement that bodies perform, but, although many men fight in their imaginations, they dare not even look at a real opponent, much less face combat itself.
117 skirmishes contests or encounters; fencing matches (OED, n. 3a; v. 2).
119 umbratile shadowy (OED, 2, first citation); from umbratilis (Lat.), in the shade.
120 body’s] F2 (bodies)
125 presently at once.
126 generous noble, high-minded; synonym for ‘ingenious’ (2.5.27).
127 Let me alone Leave it to me.
127 SD] this edn; not in F2
128–9 128–9]speech headings in roman type; speeches in italics in F2
128 petition (1) formal application made in writing to a court for reprisal that lies within the jurisdiction of the court without an action or suit by an individual; complaining of Ironside’s breach of the peace would apply to this sense (see OED, 4b); (2) legal bond for maintaining peace between two or more parties (OED, Surety 5c); Silkworm’s challenge may read as though it were a request for peaceful resolution, not for a duel; (3) mathematically, a postulate or axiom (OED, 5).
129 of right . . . law (1) in law, a petition of right is an ancient common law remedy against the crown for obtaining restitution of real or personal property (OED, Petition 4a); (2) a current political reference: the petition of right was a parliamentary declaration of the rights and liberties of the people, including freedom from unparliamentary taxation (forced loans), forced billeting, martial law, and arbitrary imprisonment, to which Charles I had assented on 7 June 1628. While not a statute, it has force of law. See Reeve (1986). (New Inn, 2.6.58, also cites this petition.)
129 SD] this edn; not in F2
3.4 3.4 F2 (Act III. Scene IV.); Scene IV. G, who extends this scene up to Chorus 3; Act III. Scene IV. H&S
0 SD] F2 (Rut. Palate. Bias, bringing out Interest in a Chaire. / Item. Polish following.)
3.4 2 Bow Bend (OED v.1 9): cf. ‘cut her lace, and bow her forward’, Richard Brome, The Sparagus Garden (1640), 5.12. sig. L2v (H&S).
2, 3, 4, 6, 7 SDs These SDs share the violence among the men onstage, but the assignment of my directions is arbitrary; any of them might perform all or some of the action. This is less the case at 10–12 below, where the dialogue confirms Rut’s action, and possibly the inaction or lame action of the others. See Introduction. The pinching and other marks of medical violence in this scene correspond to the implied or potential action of ‘The Cure of Avarice’ in Massinger’s The Roman Actor (1625; pub. 1629), 2.1; according to Domitia, one of the onstage audience, the subject ‘was filch’d out of Horace’.
2, 3, 4, 6 SDs] this edn; not in F2
6 fear state of alarm, dread (of Ironside).
7 SD.1 Item hesitates.] this edn; not in F2
7 SD.2 Rut . . . startles.] this edn; not in F2
8 groans] F2 (graones)
10 SD See 13 below.
10 SD] this edn; not in F2
12 rut . . . where?] H&S, scanned as part of verse line 11; on a separate line in F2
19 Cousin Interest is already according his favoured suitor the status of kinship.
19 all’s well Proverbial (Tilley, A154: ‘All’s well that ends well’).
23 Chaucer Of the relationship between the doctor of physic and apothecaries, Jonson quotes from Chaucer, Gen. Prol., 428: ‘Hir frendship was nought newe to biginne.’ That is, they had been used to dealing with one another for quite some time. H&S point out that Jonson, here as in Bart. Fair, 2.4.39, reads ‘new’ as ‘now’.
25 I’their swath-bands In their swaddling clothes (cited in OED, 1); that is, from their infancy.
25 gossip,] this edn; Gossip. F2
26 clouts Playing on (1) swathing-clouts, swaddling clothes; and (2) remnants of cotton cloth used for household tasks.
27 rub up (1) examine closely, investigate by physical examination (OED, 2c); (2) impede, hinder, in the sense of putting a stop to the disease (OED, 3b). Originally a bowling term.
31 pursiness (1) difficulty of breathing; wheezing or puffing; possibly asthma (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); (2) dyspnoea, shortness or shallowness of breath, or ‘stopping the conduits of the lights [lungs]’ due to anxiety or panic (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
31 stoppage obstruction in a bodily organ.
32 tumour (1) swollen condition or swelling; especially if abnormal or morbid; (2) figuratively, swelling of passion or humour, like Interest’s avarice.
32 purse (1) money-bag; (2) any pouchlike body part, such as the stomach or womb, thus continuing the parallel between Interest’s condition and Placentia’s; cf. ‘marsupium’ (34). Medical and monetary imagery continues from here to ‘anatomical’, at 71 below. Massinger achieved a similar, if broader, effect of sympathetic magic in ‘A Cure of Avarice’ (The Roman Actor, 2.1) by having an iron chest forced open and its money bags, jewels, and bonds emptied out and scattered on a table, thus releasing his patient from miserly behaviour.
33 ligatures (1) anything binding or tying like purse strings; (2) ligaments.
34 I’th’] F2 (I’th)
34 vesica bladder (Lat.) (OED, first 1693).
34 marsupium pouch (Lat.); playing on purse (OED, first 1698) and stomach.
35 knit tied.
35 evaporate (1) reduce the swelling by driving off the liquid part (OED, 3, first 1646); (2) emit in the form of vapour, implying fart (OED, 6).
36 relaxatives muscle relaxants, medicine inducing relaxation.
37 restive (1) inactive, inert; (2) stubborn, intractable, resisting control.
39 discharge a reckoning pay a bill.
40 chiragra hand-gout (Gk); cf. Devil, 3.3.79; a form of arthritis. Gout usually attacks middle-aged men, showing up in inefficient excretion of uric acid in the urine, with the result that urate deposits develop in the cartilage, ligaments, and tendons, causing (in this case) damage to the ganglia and wrist with possible renal complications (Merck Manual of Diagnosis and Therapy, 8th edn). On the other hand, ‘gout’ was a vague term since classical times, and ‘hand-gout’ had been associated with usurers: as in Horace, Epist. 1.1.31, and Martial, 1.98. Cf. Jonson, Epigr. 31, ‘On Bank the Usurer’ who ‘feels no lameness of his knotty gout’, and Wright (1934), esp. 183.
41 purge be purged (with an emetic or an enema, or perhaps both). Cf. ‘discharge’ (39 above).
42 t’advise] F2 (to’advise)
43 all . . . ways with all the usual three respected treatments.
44 sweat, purge, and phlebotomy Chief methods of cure, as in Burton, Anatomy, 1.2.2.4 (Peck).Phlebotomy was the practice of cutting open a vein to let the blood flow, thought to have therapeutic effects; usually called bleeding. Burton had reservations about this practice. The idea is used metaphorically at 48 below to describe parting with money.
49 vein (1) blood vessel; (2) frame of mind or mood. Cf R3, 4.2.109: ‘I am not in the giving vein today.’
51 girdle belt.
53 habit practice.
55 ha’] Wh; h’ F2
57 diet-drink Medicinal drink for nutrition. Since it comes from a tavern, presumably it is a strong ale like stout, prescribed for Elizabeth Barrett Browning in the nineteenth century to build up her constitution.
59 King’s Head Probably the tavern on Fish Street Hill. Other taverns of the name were located on Fleet Street, in Smithfield, and in Southwark, but the Fish Street tavern was a prominent and thus likely haunt for an ambitious miser (Chalfant, 1978, 115–16).
60 take before you be the guinea-pig; test the food and drink before you take it, to prove its value as a prescription (commonly done at court in the period to allay fear of poisoning).
62 secundum artem according to the art (Lat.).
63 pro captu recipientis according to the capacity of the recipient (Lat.).
64 errant (1) rascally; probably an error for (2) arrant, genuine (OED, Arrant 4).
64 ’spute dispute; with a play on spew, spit out (H&S); see OED, Spute v.2.
66 cast . . . wine would diagnose disease by reading the state of his wine, probably after elimination as urine. The usual expression is ‘cast water’, meaning diagnose by inspecting ‘a man’s water for the physicians to cast or judge by’ (Florio, 1598, LEME); see Heywood, The Wise Woman of Hoxton, 2.1.
67 residence sediment, or hypostasis: ‘substance in an urine flitting toward the bottom of the urine’ (Florio, 1598, LEME).
69 oppilation obstruction; cf. Volp., 2.2.58, and Burton, Anatomy, 1.2.3.15 (Peck).
71 anatomical . . . dissection by analysis gained through cutting up the body. The line indicates Rut’s approval of the rabbi’s method.
71 SD] F2, in right margin
76 fit session.
76 SD] this edn; not in F2
77 mended cured.
77 SD] this edn, following G; not in F2
3.5 ] F2 (Act III. Scene V.); no scene change in G; Act III. Scene VI. H&S
0 SD] this edn; Compasse. Diaphanous. Practise. Bias. Ironside. F2
3.5 6 will will deny the request to deliver the challenge.
7 twi-reason justification that has two related parts. Bias will not act as a second in a duel because it is against the law; and he cannot afford to lose his lord’s patronage, by which he has the chance of a position at court (see esp. 19–22 below). Bias’s fear of transgression relates to James I’s Edict and Severe Censure against Private Combats and Combatants (1613) which punished seconds or carriers of challenges in the same degree as the duellists, the penalty being banishment from court for seven years, including the loss of any duties or offices held by the offenders (Giddens, 2001, 314).
8 hazard . . . favour put my lord’s patronage of me or reliance on me at risk.
9 forfeit . . . Honour lose his good opinion of my abilities of discernment and discretion.
10 ruffian cut-throat villain or swaggering bully (utterly distorting the concept of a respectable second, except that duelling was against the law).
11 Naught Nothing.
12 to’t my calligraphy in addition to my skill in handwriting. A good secretary or professional writer (scribe) could employ different styles of hand-writing for different kinds of documents, including court hand, black letter or gothic hand, secretary, bastard, and italic hands. Most common in official documents and records was the secretary hand, through which scribes attempted to ensure legibility (‘a fair hand’) and the standardization of abbreviations and other scribal short cuts and cues. A secretary was also expected to master rhetorical devices and epistolary formats, as are described in detail in Angel Day, The English Secretary (1599).
14 Being the part of his body actually holding and performing with the weapon.
15 obnoxious to exposed to injury from (OED, 1).
15 common peril usual danger of duelling; that is, wounding or death.
16 search seek out.
17 commit us establish an agreement between the combatants.
19 stood at end participated even in a minor way, took a side or small role in furthering.
21 state course political career.
21 read the politics studied the political writers; or simply, studied the political scene.
25 strict close or intimate (OED, 5, now obsolete).
26 humanity cultivated interests in the humanities (from humanitas, Lat.); mental cultivation (OED, 4).
27 seed-plot seed-bed; ground for nurturing seedlings.
28–37 This satirical view of French punctiliousness in taking up challenges has a basis in truth. Even after Italy and England declared duelling illegal, the nobility of France continued to kill themselves off in displays of fencing bravado. Henri Ⅲ (1574–89) favoured celebrated duellists, and Henri Ⅳ (1589–1610) commuted the punishment of 7,000 duellists; during their reigns, one-third of the French nobles were killed in duels (Bryson, 1938, 118–19, 131).
29–30 see . . . travel observe the adverse consequence resulting from the pleasures of travel; with a play on sweet/sour.
31 professing arms claiming skill as a fencer; see Chorus 2, 6n.
34 or . . . or either . . . or.
35 colour pretext; shade (OED, 12).
36 poltroonery cowardice.
36 like such as.
39 SD] Happé; takes him aside G
40 If I only had a hope that Ironside were angry enough. As his next lines indicate, Bias would be delighted to see the end of Silkworm.
42 impertinent meddlesome, presumptuous, or insolent person who interferes in things that are none of his business (OED, 2).
45 sort group, kind.
45 servants followers, supporters (not menials).
46 fellows equals.
48 servile offices services unseemly for a gentleman to perform.
49 empire officiousness, false exercise of authority (see Devil, 3.3.45).
53 politics schemers.
56 accessory criminally implicated; cf. 60 below. (Stressed on first and third syllables.)
56 accessory] F2 (accessary)
57 purpose?] Wh; purpose. F2
58–9 the corruption . . . another The degeneration of one kind of matter in nature is also what causes regeneration, or birth of other matter; the decay of one thing facilitates or fertilizes the growth of another. Proverbial; Dent, C667: ‘The corruption of one is the generation of another.’
60 as lief rather.
62 then?] G; then. F2
63 incense inflame, provoke.
63 his Ironside’s.
64 beat the messenger See Ant., 2.5.60–5, and R3, 4.4.514–23.
64 Oh,] F2 (O’)
64 secure make safe (OED, 2a).
65 lodging] F2 (lodging;)
67 induction (1) inducement (OED, 1); (2) form of argument from particulars to universals (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); or ‘demonstration, which supports sense, presses nature, and is instanced in works, and in a sort mingled therewith’ (Blount, 1656, citing Bacon, LEME).
68 impediment hindrance, obstruction; punning on impedimenta, baggage of an army.
69 baggage good-for-nothing, vile (OED, 3); punning on impediment above.
69 SD] F2, in right margin
70 Save . . . mushroom Except for this upstart Silkworm, the one who is issuing the challenge and who must either fight or sue Ironside in court. These words cannot be addressed to Bias, since Ironside does not know that Bias has been asked to deliver the challenge (68). Bias may react fearfully, as though the words were meant for himself; he almost delivered the challenge under pressure from Compass, but Ironside’s entrance prevented him from doing so.
70 mushroom upstart, parvenu (OED, 2); cf. EMO, 1.2.162, and Epicene, 2.4.120.
72 save . . . labour By agreeing now to a duel without involving anyone else in a violation of the law by delivering a challenge. See 7n. above, and Giddens (2001), 315.
75 ulcer running or open sore.
75 pink decorative slash in clothes (OED, n.3, cites this line).
77 not mean do not intend.
79 You’ve . . . coward i.e. You’re a fine one to be calling me a coward. Here, cause, adequate grounds for action (OED, 3), is uttered sarcastically.
79 You’ve] F2 (Yo’have)
80 The touch or blow of ordinary fresh air.
80 life-giving] Wh; life giving F2
81 panoply full suit of armour.
83 generous wine wine of good quality (OED, 5, vinum generosum from Horace).
87–8 I . . . kind Said ironically; Compass believes that there is only one kind of valour.
89 virtue manliness, valour; from virtus (Lat.).
90–1 Which . . . coward And anyone who lacks this pure valour is worthy to be called a coward.
91 he Silkworm.
92–4 The New Inn . . . public See Lovel’s defence of true valour in New Inn, 4.4, esp. 87–93.
93 decries disparages, condemns openly.
96 Lies Exists.
96 redargue confute or challenge by argument (OED, 2).
100 take cold catch a cold.
101 keep cold stay cool and calm.
102 relish savour, give pleasure.
103 i’the . . . nature in the way nature regulates things.
104 combatant combative, contentious, aggressive.
106 divisions types, different kinds (for the sake of argument). Happé suggests, ‘perhaps by disputing about fortitude they may not be brave enough to fight’.
107 may which may.
109 passion vehement feeling, here anger that provokes him to defend his honour in a duel (see OED, 6 and 7).
110 Read Deliver.
110–11 ’twixt . . . executions between what I commit myself to doing and what I actually perform.
113 read the town studied London attitudes; cf. 31–5 above.
113 Towntop Ironic nickname for some authority on fencing (H&S), or simply a name for town gossip generated by the social whirl, spun out of the imagination. See 117 below. Literally, a parish-top or whipping-top was a top spun by whipping, bought for exercise in the parish.
114 Your first? What is your first illustration or type of valour?
114 unexperience inexperience, recklessness (not in OED).
116 O’ . . . head Of a superior rank or status (said ironically). Cf. 2.3.58n.
117–18 Commend . . . thread If you praise Diaphanous, he will spin you a yarn as flimsy and sheer as the threads of his shirt.
118–19 The next . . . scapes Diaphanous’s second category of valour is one of presuming too much on an ability to escape from a risky situation.
119 often frequent; commonly adjectival in the seventeenth century; cf. ‘an often courtier’, Poet., 4.2.11.
120–3 Compass restates Diaphanous’s second kind of valour as a forlorn hopelessness, based on a dearth of adversaries or an empty battle position, as experienced by sentinels (perdus or forsaken outposts, as in OED, 2a), who give up expectation of survival or even of having to fight, after being long abandoned at a remote station when the battle has moved elsewhere. See ‘forlorn’, 5.10.147n.; also, EMO, 5.6.54 and Dekker, Work for Armourers (Non-Dramatic Works, ed. Grosart, 4.120).
123 shot-free beyond the range of pistol-fire; also used of those who drink in a tavern without paying the shot, or bill. Cf. Und. 25.48.
123 sword-free out of a sword’s reach, invulnerable.
123 other,] F2 state 2; other state 1
123 free.] F2 state 2; free, state 1
125 testy grumpy, irascible.
126 self-conceited thinking too highly of themselves; tangled in their own poetic metaphors.
127 peevishness fretful or petty ill-temper.
128 He merely dances around the subject of valour, without establishing or showing an understanding of what it is or even that it exists. He certainly does not demonstrate it.
129 history of distempers relation of incidents about ill-tempered people.
130 harangue tirade or diatribe addressed to an audience.
131 desperate resolving reckless decision to take a course of action under dire circumstances which elicit an imitation of valour (see OED, Resolve v. 11, 13, 14). In their sneering, Compass and Practice continue to reduce Diaphanous’s ideas to their most inglorious.
132 necessitous deprived of necessities of life; impoverished.
133 Incumbent Falling as a pecuniary liability (OED, 3b); threatening (OED, 5).
135 you] Wh; shou F2
135 gamesters gamblers.
135 blown up ruined. Cf. Epigr. 112.6.
137 exemplified made an example of (H&S).
139 lost his ears Alexander Gil the Younger (1597–1644) was sentenced to have his ears cropped, but was pardoned in 1630 (Peck). A schoolmaster at St Paul’s (where the senior Gil was headmaster), Gil was an outspoken political critic, who in 1628 ran into serious trouble with the authorities for criticism of the King’s favorite, the Duke of Buckingham. Critical of Jonson’s play, Gil offended the playwright with his verses, ‘Upon Ben Jonson’s Magnetic Lady’ (see Literary Record, Electronic Edition). In reply, Jonson mentions Gil’s ‘loss of ears’, ‘An Answer to Alexander Gil’ (6.541), line 4, making the point that Gil was incapable of hearing and understanding a play properly, despite intact ears.
140 Cf. 3.3.33.
141 histrionical ostentatiously theatrical, hypocritical, scornful (OED, 2).
141 contempt (1) object of contempt or shame (OED, 3); (2) in law, open disrespect to the authority of the sovereign or his representatives, as in contempt of court (OED, 4).
142 mischief evil condition, misfortune.
143 apprehension (1) lawful arrest, or taking manual possession (OED, 2, 3); (2) anticipation of a dire consequence; fear or dread of what may happen (OED, 11, 12).
144 is is found.
148 rogue people criminal population. Happé suggests the reference is generally to those who attend public executions, but the meaning here seems to be an object lesson for those criminal spectators likely to be publicly executed in the future, and who might well adopt ‘dull desperate resolving’ as the only valour left to them, allowing them to die with some dignity, admired by the public watching their final moments.
148–9 good sport . . . ground Compass describes public hangings as a theatrical entertainment, with the audience looking up from the ground, like the groundlings in the pit of a public theatre.
151 liberal . . . danger generous, open-minded engagement with peril.
154 sheaf class. Heraldic term; see OED, 4, and EMO, 2.1.78 and n.
154–6 Who . . . defend Who, though mortal, like ordinary men, still must defend their status and public reputation.
159–65 Many of our politicians and their assistants, like the soldiers of the city, are valiant in preserving their own property, and would fight like wild animals, not in ferocious physical attack, but by putting their heads together for stratagems, and linking their activities together to form a solid front against the enemy. This description satirizes middle-class city valour (in defence of their own materialism) by wording it to echo ancient military closely packed squares, as in Virgil’s Aeneid, 10.361 (H&S) or Homer, Iliad, 16.214–17: ‘They stood so close together, shield to shield, helmet to helmet, man to man, that when they moved their heads the glittering peaks of their plumed helmets met’ (Happé).
166 well-pressed thoroughly urged; but playing on the idea, in the previous lines, of being tightly packed.
169 resolve of settle upon.
171 with his leave if he will allow me to list them.
172 perks lifts his head, thrusts forward boldly or impudently (OED, v.1 1b).
172 chatters talks rapidly. Often applied vituperatively to speech one does not like.
174 infused ingrained or inspired.
175 genii personal spirits or guardian angels who protect and give one valour. Lat. (see Hym., 484, and EMO, 2.1.79 and 3.3.52).
176 ethnics those who are neither Christians nor Jews (ethnikos, Gr).
179 ‘Without some portion of divine inspiration’, Cicero, De natura deorum (‘On the Nature of the Gods’), 2.167 (H&S).
181 patient toleration Christian stoicism in turning the other cheek rather than casting the first stone.
184 passion . . . action suffering rather than physical retaliation. H&S cite Epicene, 4.5.207–8, when Daw agrees that fortitude consists magis patiendo quam faciendo, magis ferendo quam feriendo; ‘more in suffering than in doing, more in enduring than in striking a blow’.
185 The joke here is that Diaphanous ascribes to himself a Christian stoical patience which can so conveniently be an excuse for a coward not to fight like a gentleman.
186–8 Compass conceals his contempt for Diaphanous in a witty double meaning: ‘Do you really think you can justify morally the killing of a man in cold blood?’ when Diaphanous is in fact seeking various rationales to avoid having to fight.
190 divine image ‘Let us make man in our image and likeness’ (Genesis, 1.26).
191 images Ironside and Diaphanous, as being made in God’s image.
191 a’ God’s name in God’s name or on God’s behalf (not in a merely human quarrel).
3.6 ] F2 (Act III. Scene VI.); no scene change in G; Act III. Scene VII. H&S
3.6 0 SD intervening interrupting; lit., coming between (Lat.).
0 SD] this edn; To them inter-vening. in right margin. / Keepe. Needle. Interest. centred below, F2
2 frantic lunatic, often used derogatively as a reproach for folly.
4 trow do you suppose? (OED, v. 4b and c, often in a merely expletive sense).
5 the party the person in question.
6 gowked foolish, bug-eyed with stupefaction. The verb gowk means ‘stare foolishly’.
6 gowked] G; gok’t F2; gucked Wilkes
7 haste away hasten.
8 scoffing dismissive or deriding. Keep means that asking for the doctor is pointless. Rut is a scoffer who has provided no medical assistance at all: he wrongly dismissed Placentia’s condition as dropsy earlier, and finds her current condition the subject for jest (line 10 below).
9 Item is not much more reliable medically than Rut.
10 dispatch hurry.
12 tympany swelling; see 2.3.14 and note. H&S quote a Star Chamber case of 29 April 1632 in which Joan Lane, married for two months, was accused of being pregnant, but claimed she had a tympany; the Bishop of London thought it was ‘a tympany with two heels’.
12 SD.1–2] G adds both stage directions; not in F2
13 buttered (1) spread with butter or served with melted butter; hence, tasty (like buttered ale); (2) punning gibe at Nathaniel Butter who printed News from Most Parts of Christendom in 1622, and subsequently established himself as a foreign correspondent and newspaper publisher, thus beginning the London press (but see 3.1.8n. on the reputation of news as slander or gossip); cf. Staple, 1.4.13, and 3.Int., 16–17. Butter is one of the people Alexander Gil specifically mentions as enjoying the failure of Mag. Lady on stage: ‘Oh, how thy friend Nat Butter ’gan to melt, / Whenas the poorness of thy plot he smelt’ (‘Upon Ben Jonson’s Magnetic Lady’, Literary Record, Electronic Edition).
15 paid over and done with, a dead issue. Interest sees that he will not have to pay out the dowry, because no one of any prominence or position will want to marry Placentia, since she is guilty of bastard-bearing, a criminal act. See Amussen (1988), 102.
16 Oh, the] this edn; o’the F2
16 SD] in left margin between line 15 and line 16 in F2
17 He’s] F2 (H’has)
19 discovery revelation.
19 light gold (1) Gold below the standard or legal weight, usually because it has been clipped from coins for criminal uses (OED, Light adj.11b); John Dee’s alchemical collaborator Edward Kelly had his ears cropped for clipping and coining (parodied in Alch., 3.2.140–59; (2) Placentia herself, a wanton or unchaste heiress (OED, Light 14b). Several proclamations between 1629 and 1635, successively harsher, warn against light gold and the problem of not weighing coins received to determine their worth; although earlier proclamations agreed that coins should be accepted at face value, by 1633, coins were to be accepted by weight only and people were warned to accept only recently issued coins, which were retooled by weight, and refuse old debased coins. See Perfect Directions for All English Gold Now Current in this Kingdom, 1631.
20 cracked . . . ring (1) Proverbial (Dent, R130.1): invalidated as a coin, if it were cracked to within the ring around the King’s head (H&S); (2) sexually active, alluding to the breaking of the hymen (OED, Crack 13); devirginated, either directly as in ‘think her bond of chastity quite cracked’, Cym., 5.5.206–7, or allusively as in Ham., 2.2.390–1 (Partridge).
21 SD] this edn; not in F2 ; after How? line 15, Wh (subst.)
22 on put on.
23 slurred (1) besmirched or sullied in honour; (2) put off with something cheap or unsatisfactory (OED, Slur v.1 4, first cited in 1749, but applicable here: see 26–8 below).
23 captain!] F2 state 2; Captaine: state 1
25 Shrunk (1) Withdrawn; (2) shrivelled with embarrassment or confusion.
25 hence,] this edn; hence,! state 1; hence; state 2 F2
25 contracted . . . centre Alluding to Compass as the mathematical tool, a pair of compasses, which normally has one leg fixed in the centre of a circle, while the other sweeps the perimeter, but in making his exit, Compass has removed or retracted both legs from his survey of the circle, apparently abandoning his geometrical function. Since ‘centre’ may imply ‘interior’, the wordplay here allows the mathematical reference to imply (1) backstage area, within the tiring house; and (2) Compass’s source of inner strength, or intelligence, which will allow him to re-examine the situation in Lady Loadstone’s house, in the light of current changes.
26 slip (1) sexual indiscretion, or its result, the baby (a slip from the patriarchal plant, OED, n.2 1c); thus, a moral fault, or error in conduct (OED, n.3 10); (2) counterfeit coin made, for example, of brass covered with silver or gilded copper (OED, n.4); cf. EMI (F), 2.5.134, and Und. 45.17. Figuratively, these meanings suggest deception or fraud. Middleton’s play-within-a-play in A Mad World, My Masters, 5.2 is called ‘The Slip’ for similar reasons and in the additional sense of steal off and escape (OED, n.3 8), a meaning that chimes with Compass’s exit, noticed after the fact by Ironside and Practice at 24 above.
26–8 I . . . counterfeit I might well have been blamed or humiliated if I had completed the marriage contract, and had the bastard, a fake child (not of my own paternity), foisted on me, thus ruining my family honour.
28 abused deceived.
29 brought on encouraged.
31 fortune good luck; foresight.
31 brought us off rescued us, playing on ‘on’ (29) and ‘off’.
31 SD] G; not in F2
Chorus 3 ] this edn; Chorus. F2
Chorus 3 1 shift trick.
1–2 prime woman chief female character, heroine. Placentia is not in fact the true heroine of the play, but the audience cannot know that at this point, and certainly Jonson’s shaping of his play to mimic pregnancy and delivery suggests mockery of the female body, as Damplay complains. The Boy’s response, 3–12, is more concerned with silencing Damplay than dealing with his objections. In Damplay’s defence, his point is well taken. In the terms cited in 1.Chorus, 1–8, the protasis introduces the girl’s undiagnosed swelling on the occasion of her birthday dinner; the epitasis develops the desperate search among the guests for a husband to relieve the girl’s condition; the catastasis has its turning point in the unexpected labour along with the cover-ups and clean-ups that follow the afterbirth; and the catastrophe reveals the important truth about childbirth, identity, and inheritance. See Ostovich (1994) for fuller discussion of Jonson’s using the curve of pregnancy to define the play’s development, in line with Scaliger’s critical terms.
2 compose settle (OED, 9).
4 current flow; with wordplay on stream and on course or direction of events (OED, 1, 5, and 6).
4 argument plot.
7 auditory audience.
7 suspended left hanging.
8 accidental not essential to the conception (in the study of logic).
9 throes contractions of childbirth.
10 compass . . . comedy unity of time defined in classical comic practice.
11 prime primary, original; also a mathematical term denoting unity.
11 artifice artistic construction or workmanship.
12 determine conclude; circumscribe.
13 mark pay attention to.
16 privilege special right or immunity attaching to rank; prerogative (OED, 4).
16 prerogative peculiar right or privilege of rank. Damplay seems to confuse this with royal prerogative, a sovereign right subject to no restriction or interference (OED, 1).
17 overgrown too orpulent; see 1.2.34.
17 superannuated old and infirm.
18 censure offer critical commentary.
18 tobacco Taking tobacco began as a fad in the 1590s, and almost immediately became the target of satire; see EMO, 3.1.106–19, in which Shift advertises his skill in teaching the ‘gentlemanlike use of tobacco’, including blending leaves for the pipe, smoking, and tricks of exhaling; later, Fastidious Brisk fails to impress his mistress by puffing between lame witticisms. As Macilente remarks, ‘I ne’er knew tobacco taken as a parenthesis before’ (3.3.63). Alch. includes Abel Drugger, ‘a tobacco-man’, in the cast of characters, Overdo rants against tobacco fumes in Bart. Fair, 2.6, and Devil links smoking with hell (5.8.71–2), in line with James I’s Counterblast to Tobacco (1604). See also Cynthia (Q), Praeludium, and EMI, frequently throughout, esp. Cob’s various diatribes on ‘this same filthy, roguish tobacco’ (F, 1.4.62–3).
18–19 Magna . . . reprehension freedom of speech, specifically to criticize. H&S cite New Inn, 1.2.24.
20 licence abuse of freedom, disregard of propriety.
21 travail labour. Probee echoes Damplay’s comment about the structure of the play, despite the Boy’s explanation. That is, he too sees pregnancy and delivery as the play’s basis, metaphorical or actual, forging an identification between the girl’s and the audience’s expectations (cf. 22 below).
22 come on enter, come onstage.
24 suited set in due order (OED, 8).
24 search examine.
25 to the nail punctiliously, to the point of perfection, as in ad unguem, Horace, Satires, 1.5.32 (OED, 3c).
27 pare . . . quick clip too closely to the sensitive flesh from which the nail grows.
27 smart hurt, sting.
28 shrewd (1) sharp, keen, used especially of pain (OED, 9); (2) cunning, sharp-tongued, playing on ‘quick’, meaning quick-witted, and ‘smart’, meaning clever in repartee (27 above).
28 has me has bested or outdone my arguments.
4.1 ] F2 (Act IIII. Scene I.)
0 SD] G; Chaire. Needle. Keepe. F2
4.1 1 prick too fast travel too quickly; usually used of urging on cattle with a goad, or spurring a horse; playing on Needle’s name for the action.
3 stool (1) stool which is placed below the patient’s perineal area, so that the midwife may sit to assist at the birth. See Evenden (2000), 81, and illustration cited below; (2) birthing-chair. The woodcut from the 1554 edition of De conceptu et generatione hominis, by Jakob Rüff (1500–58) shows a four-legged chair in the shape of a compass, with a backward-sloping back to allow a semi-recumbent position and a black cover over the lower part of the chair that allowed the patient to cover herself. Other birthing-chairs were three-legged stools (more popular in England) behind which an assistant supported the patient while the midwife, on a lower stool, attended to the delivery, as in the Rosengarten engraving of a birthing-stool in Eucharius Roslin’s Der Swangern Frauwen und Hebammen (‘Birthing Women and Midwives’), 1513. See also Cressy (1997), 52–3.
3 stitch sharp pain from being out of breath (OED, 2), punning on Needle.
4 son, mother These modes of address do not imply biological relationship, but are polite informal exchanges based on age. See ‘The Persons that Act’, 6.
4 Good mother] so placed by H&S; at the start of line 5 in F2
5 Piece up Mend, patch up (OED, 8).
6 grogram coarse silk fabric.
6 grogram] F2 (Grogoran)
6 SD] G; not in F2
8 prick-seam Stitch used in glove-sewing (OED, first citation).
8 through-stitch Stitch drawn right through the material; figuratively, thoroughness of action.
8 stitch, Master Needle.] G; stitch. Mr. Needle, F2
10 but just; used as an adverbial intensifier, expressing urgency. Cf. Corvino’s desperate whine to Celia: ‘Do, but, go kiss him. / Or touch him, but’ (Volp., 3.7.111–12).
10 come up i.e. to Placentia’s chamber, but Keep may simply mean ‘hurry up’.
10 SD] Following G; not in F2
4.2 ] F2 (Act IIII. Scene II.)
0 SD] G; Compass. Keepe. Practise. F2
4.2 1 chamber bedroom.
4 SD] G; not in F2
6 have a hand in take part or share in the doing of something.
6 ill-formed (1) poorly managed, with a play on evil or harmful; (2) poorly conceived; with a play on ill-gotten or misbegotten, considering that illicit pregnancy is the ‘business’.
9 aspersion (1) soil, stain by spattering; (2) defamation.
9 spot (1) dirty speck, stain; (2) moral disgrace, stigma.
10–12 She . . . values? Why would Lady Loadstone plot against Practice, a man she admires, praises, and esteems, aside from all other considerations? (These considerations are subsequently listed at 12–20.)
10 Practice,] F3; Practise. F2
12 Cries up Praises, usually in public. Cf. Epicene, 1.1.61–2.
14 lord paramount authority who exercises supreme power or jurisdiction (OED, 1).
14 head o’the Hall lord chief justice at Westminster Hall, where the Courts of Common Law for England and Wales held sessions.
15 top . . . top-gallant pinnacle of a legal career; from sails at the top of the rigging (OED, Top 9c). The nautical expression (Dent, T437: ‘top and topgallant’) means ‘in full array’, here applied to judicial formal dress and accoutrements, as well as to the rank itself; cf. Bart. Fair, 4.5.40 and note (see Ostovich, Four Comedies).
16 deprave corrupt or pervert.
18 might . . . infamy who might destroy your reputation, or be your undoing.
20 And had proposed to elevate socially through marriage to her niece.
21 beholdingness obligation.
23 affection inclination.
26 prognostics foreknowledge.
26 almanacs Calendars with astronomical and astrological data, weather forecasts, and important ecclesiastical anniversaries. Since 1540 almanacs and prognostications had been bound in the same volume: almanac and calendars first, then a separate title-page and the prognostications, as in Buckminster (1935), 7–8. The format included gardening notes, dates of terms and holidays, favourable days for weddings, times of eclipses, seasonal phenomena, hours of moonlight, and tips for better health. See the characterization of Sordido in EMO, 1.2, for Jonson’s satirical view of such credulousness.
29 some times] Wh; sometimes F2
30 sign astrological sign of the zodiac.
31 phlebotomy opening a vein to allow bleeding, often determined astrologically in early medicine; cf. Chaucer, Gen. Prol., 415–16.
32 good . . . bad Cf. ‘cross out my ill-days’ (Alch., 1.3.95).
33 I do . . . do not i.e. Yes, I choose to be with my mistress on astrologically favourable days and avoid her on inauspicious days. (An elliptical way of answering Compass’s question.)
34 Allestree Richard Allestree of Derby (1618–43), almanac maker 1624–43 (H&S). Alexander Gil deliberately insulted Jonson by describing Allestree, a doggerel-verse writer, as a Homer compared to Jonson (cf. Literary Record, Upon Ben Jonson’s Magnetic Lady, 36).
36 under seal legally sealed, in confidence. See 39 below. Cf. 2.5.42 and note for the religious sense.
38 Another . . . piece A quite different sort of woman. Cf. Bart. Fair, 1.4.66. The term ‘piece’ also suggests sexual appraisal; cf. Partridge and OED, 9b.
39 sub sigillo under seal, Lat. See 36n.above.
41 counsel . . . counsel advice . . . lawyer (the sense of 42 below).
43 jeer act of jeering; derisive utterance, or taunt (OED, n2 1, first citing Staple, 4.1). Cf. Ostovich (1986).
46 bencher One of the senior members of the Inns of Court, who form for each inn a self-elective body, managing its affairs and possessing the privilege of calling to the bar.
46 double reader senior lecturer in law at the Inns of Court. A single reader had fifteen or sixteen years’ standing in the Inn; a double reader had a further seven years’ standing (Gifford, citing Dugdale). Practice is either very precocious, since he is elsewhere referred to as young (1.3.26), or he must be at least forty-two years old, which would not qualify as young in this period.
47 mere pure, without ulterior motive.
48 If . . . so If you really mean it. Compass is sceptical.
48 perplexed muddled, confused (OED, 2).
49 settling opportunity of becoming quiet and composed (OED, 5).
51–2 I . . . This Compass can take advantage of this information to make sure his rival Practice does not marry Pleasance.
51–3 I . . . too] parenthetical in F2
53 licence marriage licence.
54 straight straightaway, immediately (OED, 2).
55 parson’s pint An offhand, somewhat derogatory reference to the bride-cup (see 56n.): ‘A cup in old time borne covered before a bride’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME). The term may also be a glance at communion cup, although Protestant reformers had dropped communion as part of the wedding ceremony. But Henrietta Maria was Catholic, and many Caroline believers, like the Arminians, were Catholic-leaning; at the Catholic Mass, however, the cup was withheld from the laity, and so would not be synonymous with ‘knitting cup’ (56 below).
55 him in In F2, the text reads ‘him –’ with the dash perhaps standing for what the compositor probably took as a gap or lost word in his copy; only three other instances of such dashes appear in F2 (see Pleasure Rec., 248 and textual note, and Augurs, 250 and 299 and textual notes).
55 him in] Wh; him i’ H&S; him – F2.
56 knitting cup cup of wine handed round at a marriage feast; OED, citing this usage, implies it is the same as the ‘parson’s pint’ at 55 above. Cf. ‘bride-cup’, New Inn, 5.4.29.
56 SD] G; not in F2
4.3 ] F2 (Act IV. Scene III.)
0 SD] Happé; Bias. Interest. Compasse. F2
4.3 3 cracked commodity damaged mer-chandise: in line with mercantile and maritime discourse about women and marriage (Happé). See ‘cracked within the ring’ (3.6.20).
4 broke bulk unloaded cargo (OED, 43); with ironic implications for Placentia’s giving birth, unloading her ‘cargo’ of an infant.
5 broke round (1) split all around (as opposed to ‘cracked in pieces’); (2) broken round the edges like a clipped coin (Happé).
7 clap (1) stroke of misfortune (OED, 6); cf. Alch., 4.6.3; punning on (2) explosive noise (OED, 1); and possibly (3) crudely, gonorrhoea (OED, n2 1a). But sexually transmitted disease is not the issue here, although the infant is the issue of illicit sexuality.
7 makes which makes, although it is uncertain whether the antecedent is ‘fault’ or ‘clap’.
7 noise (1) uproar, loud outcry; (2) quarrelling; (3) scandal (OED, 1, 1c, 2).
9 moneys] F3; money’s F2
10 muss scrambling or snatching game: ‘a getting, a filching, a shifting or prowling by hook or crook, a muss, as boys play at’ (Florio, 1598, LEME), as at Bart. Fair, 4.2.26. An earlier version seems to have been a French game of hide and seek: ‘I lurk in a corner or hide / Je me musse’ (Palsgrave, 1530, LEME).
10 gamesome playful.
11 flout insult.
11 close secretive (OED, 7).
12 bred in the politics properly trained in social ethics, the branch of moral philosophy dealing with the state (OED, Bred, ppl. a.1 2, first cited in 1655; and Politic, a. and n, 3 pl., obs.)
13 him only Sir Moth Interest alone.
14 impressed paid in advance (OED, v.3, first cited in 1665). (Accented on the first syllable.)
14 upbraids it alleges it or brings it up as a ground for reproach.
15 Furnished you Provided you with money.
15 waives (1) treats as a fleeing felon, whose abandoned stolen goods now belong to the finder (Interest); or (2) claims forfeit for abandoned property. In law, ‘waif’ refers to ‘goods that a felon, flying, leaveth behind him, which are commonly forfeit to the lord of the soil, if the right owner be not known’ (Bullokar, 1616, based on Rastell, LEME); but Rastall adds that ‘waif may be also the goods that are not stolen. As, if a man be pursued with hue and cry as a felon, and he flyeth, and leaveth his own goods, etc., these shall be taken as good waived and forfeit as if they had been stolen’ (Rastell, 1579, LEME). From Interest’s point of view, if Bias refuses the bride, then he cannot keep the money already received as dowry, even though the bride turns out to be used or stolen goods abandoned by another.
15 waives] F2 (waves)
16 expostulate reason angrily, chide, or complain about, as finding oneself grieved (Bullokar, 1616, LEME).
18 do it home strike back to the heart of the matter, thoroughly, directly, to the finish (OED, Home adv. 4, 5).
19 moth See The Persons that Act, 14n.
22 heirs of policy those likely to succeed in politics.
24 quasi . . . famam as though [to expose him] in a public scandal (fama, Lat., public opinion, especially scandalous).
25 Bias puns on ‘matrimony’ by mocking the sounds: ‘matter of money’, but he also exposes the truth about the marriage negotiations for the heiress. H&S point out the original pun in H. Parrot, The Mastive (1615), C4: ‘Nuptiae post Nummos’: ‘So that this ancient word called matrimony / Is wholly made a matter now of money’.
27 lewd (1) corrupt, shameless; (2) wanton, unchaste; (3) deceitful, false (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
27 known acknowledged as wicked; published or declared as carnally corrupt.
28–33 My . . . moneys Interest protests his own ignorance of and responsibility for Placentia’s behaviour. He goes on to argue that her reputation was not false up to now, but since her error is now known he will act upon it by retaining her money for himself.
30 Your lords Your political masters. So too at 42 below, ‘his lords’. Interest is eager to have official support for any lawsuits arising from his retaining the portion.
33 Don Spanish address, derogatory though apparently polite; also mocked in Alch., 4.3.30–1, 99, and elsewhere.
34 him Sir Moth Interest.
35 For wooing furniture For whatever gear (whether clothing or gifts) you obtained to make yourself an attractive suitor.
35 impressed charges interest on the advance (see 14n above).
39 ’Slid By God’s eyelid.
40 He Interest.
41 He Bias.
44 to the value to the previously agreed amount.
46 your . . . court Interest’s advocate (amicus curiae). Bias is the representative who will speak on his behalf at court. Cf. 2.4.2.
46 Take hands Shake hands.
49 compliment courtesy, ceremony; applied ironically to the process of buying court influence.
49 SD] Happé, following G
51 held at distance forced to remain apart. That is, the two men, now reconciled, were formerly antagonists over money.
51–2 thoughts / . . . money greedy scheming [which is] worse than mere money (considering that love of money, not money itself, is the root of all evil; cf. 2.6.41).
4.4 ] F2 (Act IV. Scene IV.)
0 SD] this edn; Polish. Keepe. Compasse. F2
4.4 1 Metrically completes the last line of the previous scene; the action is continuous.
1 caitiff wretched, vile, wicked.
2 gypsy Contemptuous terms for a woman, as fickle, deceitful (OED, 3, first cited 1632, Shirley, Love in a Maze, 4.51).
4 stroker flatterer. Cf. Temp., 1.2.333, and Epigr. 61.2.
5 out are fallen out, or quarrelling. Presumably the women’s voices begin in harsh stage-whispers, as in Alch., 1.1, and then escalate as Keep’s fury is sparked by Polish’s name-calling.
6 Eve . . . serpent Typical puritan biblical frame of reference: Genesis, 3.1–7. The analogy casts Keep as fallen woman, abuser of trust in exposing forbidden knowledge, and inciter to sin and destruction.
6 apple] F2 (Apul)
7 viper serpent ‘which of all others is the most venomous’ (Thomas, 1550, LEME). The meaning here draws on venomous or malevolent betrayal, seen as poison eating through the flesh, perhaps like the spitting of poison by adders or cobras; H&S cite ‘Out, viper, thou that eat’st thy parents, hence’ (Poet., 5.3.283), a common conception, derived from Pliny, that a nest of young vipers survives by eating the parent; but here the specific maternal nurturing linking the two women is directed benevolently at Placentia, and the two women’s poisonous attack is directed at each other as (ir)reponsible adults, without attaching blame to Placentia. Possibly Polish thinks of Keep as a dependant. Cf. Sej., 3.384–8.
7 eat eaten. (Pronounced ‘et’.)
8 recklessness] F2 (retchlesnesse)
9 frantic madly raging, furious (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
10 SD] this edn; not in F2
14 connivance colluding; winking at; or consenting to ignore or ‘make as though [s]he neither saw, nor knew ought of the matter’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
14 nodding dozing off.
15 be got] this edn; begot F2
16 hag ‘witch that changeth the favour of children’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
16 bird of night ‘screech owl, unlucky kind of bird (as they of old time said) which sucked out the blood of infants lying in their cradles’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
17 mischance (1) ill luck; (2) ‘abortive delivery afore time’ (Florio, 1598, LEME).
17 Good lady empress Ironic usage, mocking Polish for acting like a potentate with absolute power instead of recognizing Keep as a partner in the scheme about to be revealed.
18 clicket (1) child’s rattle; transferred to woman’s tongue; ‘Said of a tattling housewife, whose clicket is ever wagging: she is not tongue-tied, I warrant you’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); transferred originally from the clapper or clack-dish of a beggar; metaphorically, (2) sexual equipment, from the idea of a latch-gate, which has a nick or catch that allows the bolt to click into place; thus (3) copulation, used of foxes in Fletcher and Massinger, Humorous Lieutenant (1619), 2.4.173 (H&S). From about this point, Keep begins raising her voice in anger; see Polish’s comments at 20–1 and subsequently.
20 loud] F2 (low’d)
24–5 Tell . . . she-man-devil Proverbial: ‘Speak the truth and shame the devil’ (Dent, T566); cf. Devil, 5.8.142–3.
25 she-man-devil Coinage that suggests a woman who has taken over the prerogatives of a man, and then become a devil as a result. OED points out that such coinages as ‘she-friend’ are contemptuous, implying wrong-doing on the part of the woman.
28 high loud (see 32 below).
29–30 Pleasance . . . ‘Pleasance’ See The Persons that Act, 4.
29 ‘Placentia’] F2 (Placentia)
30 ‘Pleasance’] F2 (Pleasance)
31 horrid terrible (Florio); spiteful, churlish, and unpleasant (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
31 this — . . . discovery!] this edn; this! . . . discovery; F2
31 discovery revelation, exposé.
34 office . . . laundry-maids laundry-room. Laundresses were reputedly great spreaders of gossip, especially if any evidence passed through their hands in sheets, clothing, and unusual or expensive household goods. See articles by Gowing and Ingram in Kermode and Walker (1994).
39 The Practice of Piety Puritan devotional manual by Lewes Bayly, Bishop of Bangor, giving practical directions for living a day-to-day godly life in 814 pages; published in 1612 and reprinted at least sixty times in the seventeenth century alone, it was the single most popular and influential puritan text of the time. Polish was not alone in considering it as holy as the Bible.
41 Out . . . forge Which you worked out of your evil mind. Keep’s metaphor has a triple applicability in describing Polish as having hammered out an evil scheme in the forge of her brain: (1) ‘as a smith doth any iron work in his forge and such like’ (Palsgrave, 1530, LEME); in this case, Polish worked on steel/the Steel family; (2) as a ‘forger or counterfeiter’ (Thomas, 1550, LEME) in creating a false heiress; (3) as an imitation of hellfire, thus associating Polish again with witchcraft and the devil. Jonson used the forge as a metaphor for the seat of mental and creative powers in Discoveries: ‘bring all to the forge and file again; turn it anew’ (1735–6).
44 T’abuse the neighbourhood Keep’s depiction of Polish’s offence as perpetrated against all the community’s infants recognizes the local power of a midwife and the social reliance on her oath (part of which was explicitly a promise never to switch infants) to maintain the integrity of households in that community (see Evenden, 2000, 27–8).
45 most My Lady most heinously to abuse My Lady.
47 Proverbial (Tilley, R80); originally Aesop, Fables, ‘The Tortoise and the Eagle’ (Happé).
47, 55 SDs] G; not in F2
48–9 Conjured . . . lay Raised or invoked a demon I cannot now allay or exorcise. The terms continue to associate Polish with witchcraft or cunning-woman activity.
51 peevish wayward, averse to being pleased (Thomas, 1587, and Blount, 1656, LEME).
51–2 whom . . . satisfy of whom neither assistance nor mollification can be begged (cf. OED, Pray 6).
53 fury (1) madness, rage; (2) in Greek myth, one of three angry goddesses sent from the underworld to avenge wrong and punish crime.
53 bark small ship (Cawdrey, 1617, LEME).
54 sweet unpleasant, as an unforeseen complication, ironically inverting the meaning. At the same time, Polish recognizes the smooth symmetry of fate in having one of her own co-conspirators turn against her: sweet in terms of the neat balance.
54 arts (1) learning, skill; (2) craft, subtlety, deceit, guile (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); (3) either mathematics or witchcraft (Cockeram, 1623, LEME).
4.5 ] F2 (Act IIII. Scene V.)
0 SD] G; Pleasance. Compasse. F2
4.5 3 bravest finest. See 2.1.10.
3 boy The birth of a male child was normally the cause of celebration; it was also taken as a sign of the lustiness of the mother, whose sexual pleasure allowed her to conceive a male. Its illegitimacy illustrates the negative side of female pleasure in that her innate sexual drive makes her give in to self-destructive urges. See McLaren (1984), 15–17.
6 find . . . father produce a father (not necessarily the actual one). Heywood’s eponymous character in The Wise Woman of Hoxton provides a similar service, 2.1.
7 do’t] F3; do’r F2
8 By . . . place Because of the safeguards and private information to which she has access as a midwife; owing to the essentials peculiar to her line of work (Garfield, 1657, LEME).
11 Deserve it Merit an advantage or pleasure (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
14 fit prepare.
14 travel] F2 state 2; travell? state 1
15 sake?] F2 state 2; sake. state 1
16 entreat entertain; urge with fair words (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
20 instant urgent.
21 Wou’ Which I would wish.
21 SD] G; not in F2
22 met. Step] This edn; met, step F2
24 entertain (1) feed; (2) receive hospitably as a friend or guest (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
24 you. Master Practice,] F2 state 2; you, Mr. Practice. state 1
24 SD.1 Exit Palate.] G; not in F2
24 SD.2 Enter practice] Happé; not in F2, but see 4.6.0
4.6 ] F2 (Act IV. Scene VI.)
0 ]no SD, Wilkes; Practice. Compasse. Pleasance. Palate. F2
4.6 1 Continuous action: the line metrically completes the last line of 4.5.
3 the main the most important thing.
3 registered] F2 registred state 2; resgistred state 1
5 ’pointed appointed.
7 suspicion] F2 (supition)
8 take] F2 state 2; trke. state 1
10 Stay you Wait (imperative).
10 with us] F2; for us Wh
10 church parish church of Little St Bartholomew, or St Bartholomew-the-Less, known in Jonson’s time as St Bartholomew-Exchange (Maxwell, 2002, 49).
11 Old Exchange The Royal Exchange between Cornhill and Threadneedle Street, as distinct from the New Exchange, built in 1609, a fashionable shopping mall in the Strand (Chalfant, 1978, 75). Cf. EMI (F), 2.1.10; EMO, 4.1.84 and 4.3.327; and Devil, 2.1.21.
12 this quarter the next fifteen minutes.
16 reversion’s A reversion is a right of succeeding to an office. Jonson was granted in October 1621 a patent for the reversion of the Mastership of the Revels in the event that Sir George Buck, the then Master, and Sir John Astley, who was next in line, should die before he did (Life Records, 65, Electronic Edition). But Astley outlived Jonson, who never therefore succeeded to this office.
17 projects monopolies, satirically assumed to be corrupt; cf. 1.7.74n.
19 a right hand an indispensable aide (OED, 1c); cf. Staple, 3.2.83.
20 mind pay attention to, bear in mind.
20 in hand with in the process of dealing with.
20 SD.1, 2] G; not in F2
24, 26, 43 SDs] G; not in F2
25 have entry be registered.
26–7 Play upon values of coins, with a hit at Palate’s mercenary nature: noble meant high-minded, as well as denoting a coin worth 6s 8d; a mark was both a sign or token of respect and also a coin worth 13s 4d. Compass offers a piece (a coin, OED, 13), that is, a mark, as an advance payment for a service (officiating at a wedding, requested more specifically at 29ff. below). As Happé points out, if you add a noble and a mark together, you get £1. Compass is paying only half that amount, still a substantial fee. See Christopher Burlinson’s essay on monetary values, Electronic Edition.
28 a feat a deed, here that pertains to a parson’s work.
29 run the words read a book slightly and hastily over, without much respect had, or heed taken, either to the phrase, or matter (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME). Compass’s request is rhetorically casual.
32 to secure thee to assure you that the wedding is legitimate.
33 stick at hesitate about; earnestly occupy the mind with (Thomas, 1587, LEME), implying reluctance or even panic on the parson’s part; from ‘stick fast’, as in mire or clay; thus become ‘gravelled’ and unable to get out of a difficulty (Minsheu, 1599, LEME).
34 canon ecclesiastical law. In 1603, canon law of the Church of England established that people could marry only between the hours of eight and twelve in the morning and that the ceremony must be performed in the church (usually in the parish where the couple resided).
38 engage commit. Compass is really asking Palate to lie about the time and place in performing his duties, and to betray a previous commitment to Practice (see 36 above), both indefensible actions in a parson.
38–9 Who . . . morning Who will contradict your word that the marriage was performed duly in the morning?
41 spiced of a scrupulous conscience, ‘full of doubts and difficulties’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME); cf. Bart. Fair, 1.3.95 and Chaucer, Gen. Prol., 526.
43 profession avowal. The term usually applies to confirmation of faith, but here Compass is inciting the opposite. Usually a parson, being ‘won unto a religious profession . . . hath abandoned a loose to follow a godly, a vicious to lead a virtuous, life’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME). But not in this case.
46 till’t] F2 (’till’t)
47 under . . . Ironside guarded by Ironside, of whom you are terrified. The parson will not only be locked in, but also frightened out of his wits, if he does not comply with Compass’s request.
49 Not to loss Not even to the extent of the loss.
50 both my livings It was not unusual for a parson to hold two benefices or church preferments.
51 posy sentiment engraved on the inside of a ring.
52–3 Literally, ‘This ring will give to us what each knows’ (untraced quotation). Palate’s translation is loose, but then he is unaware, like Pleasance, that Compass has further knowledge about her family identity and fortune to share with her, or that Pleasance has knowledge (about Placentia’s infant) which will secure their financial future together (see 5.10.70ff.).
56 comprehend (1) include all the points within the compass of a description; sum up, here referring specifically to Pleasance’s true parentage and condition (OED, 6); (2) in geometry, encompass or contain as a line or surface (OED, 10).
56 SD] G; not in F2
4.7 ] F2 (Act IIII. Scene VII.)
0 SD] this edn; Chaire. Needle. Polish. Keepe. F2; Enter Mother Chair with a child, Polish, Keep, and Needle. G
4.7 2 it the baby, which is never actually shown on stage, according to the F stage directions.
3 bad commodity Cf. 4.3.3n.
4 the best . . . on’t The best should now be made of it (Tilley, B326: ‘Make the best of a bad bargain’).
5 SD] Happé; not in F2 ; Exit with the child. G adds SD at line 4 for Needle: see note at 4.7.2
6 My daughter Placentia, my client. She is a ‘daughter’ only in the sense of the connection between a midwife and the female community she serves with her specialized knowledge.
7 caudle A warm drink of thin gruel or broth mixed with wine or ale, sweetened and spiced, given to women in childbed (OED; Cotgrave, 1611, LEME).
8 breaches (1) private grudges, ruptures of friendly relations (Thomas, 1587, and Florio, 1598, LEME); (2) violations of trust (OED, 2), here unconsciously ironic, since the injured party is really Pleasance, not Polish or Keep; (3) physical or anatomical gaps, possibly a bawdy reference to the birth canal; (4) breeches (pun carried by tailor references, 8–9).
8 pieced up patched up, mended (tailor’s work), punning on ‘peaced up’ or silenced.
9 bum boom, explosion; punning on buttocks and implying ‘fart’. The term continues the tailoring pun: a bum or bum-roll is padding worn under skirts to accent the hips.
10 another?] F2 state 2; another. state 1
11 Blest . . . peacemaker Proverbial (Dent, P155: ‘blessed are the peacemakers’, from the Sermon on the Mount, Matthew, 5.9).
11 Blest . . . peacemaker] italic in F2
11 peace . . . pease A common pun, since ‘pease’ (the usual form for ‘pea’, singular or plural) was often used to mean ‘appease’; e.g. ‘Still a child that cryeth or pease one that is angry’ (Palsgrave, 1530, LEME). In EMO, 4.1.93–5, the word is used in all senses: peas, appease, and peace.
11 pease-dresser one who prepares the peas for eating.
12 her Polish.
16 was misadvised was injudicious; acted unadvisedly (OED).
17 this . . . woman Mother Chair.
18 mother woman exercising authority and receiving respect like a mother (OED, 3).
22 You Keep.
22 this gentlewoman Polish.
24 By-chop By-blow, bastard (Placentia’s infant). Palsgrave defines ‘chopped’ as ‘churlish, rude of condition’.
24 fame scandal.
25 cullis broth of boiled meat strained, fit for a sick or weak body (Cotgrave, LEME).
26 My daughter See 6n. above.
27 stir . . . necessity rouse herself, get up and move around (OED, 2), so that no one realizes that she has just had a baby. Although early modern practice was for new mothers to spend a couple of weeks at least in bed or ‘lying in’, in Placentia’s case such practice would indicate her guilt; she must get up to avoid suspicion and contradict the rumours.
28 bear it out support the activity, since the young are naturally energetic.
29 fit o’the mother hysteria; punning on the spasms of pending motherhood, childbed contractions. The womb or uterus was considered to provoke irrational or promiscuous behaviour in women; cf. green sickness, 1.4.17 and 2.2.22 and notes.
30 secretary secret, one who keeps confidences or secrets, like ‘secretary Pru’, New Inn, 1.6.25. The idea of a discreet laundress might, to an early modern audience, seem comically oxymoronic; cf. 4.4.34n.
31 blanch bleach, whiten.
31 counsels confidences. See 2.5.3 and 53 and notes.
33 make . . . highest sell at the best price available. If Polish and Keep stick to the original plan, they can still arrange a good marriage for Placentia and reap the profits (from the dowry).
33 market] F2 (Merkat)
34 peach inform against an accomplice, turn informer (OED cites this line).
34 cry proclaim.
35 Grannam’s Cross A public place such as a market cross or a crossroads used for old women’s complaints, expressions of grief, or penance; cf. Weeping Cross, Cynthia (F), 5.11.149; and Fletcher and Shirley, The Night Walker, 1.1 (1625): ‘One is a kind of weeping cross, Jack, A gentle Purgatory’ (OED).
36 deputy member of common council of London who acted on behalf of an alderman.
37 scarce even.
38 questmen elected officials of London wards charged with investigating misdemeanours; cf. ‘wardmote quest’ (1.2.28).
41 Smock-secrets Women’s secrets. OED, Smock 3b, points out that ‘smock-’ was very common in seventeenth-century dramatists to suggest loose conduct or immorality among women (in this case, both Polish’s conspiracy of switching infants, and Placentia’s sexual misconduct, resulting in bastard-bearing).
41 verge precinct or jurisdiction, from the verge of the court which extended for twelve miles round the King’s residence (OED, n.110, 11). Cf. EMO, 4.3.104. Verge is also an equivocal term of measurement, in keeping with the play’s mathematical theme: ‘a kind of measure like a yard, a man’s yard or privy member’ (Florio, 1598, LEME).
43 tiring house theatre dressing-rooms.
44–6 No . . . curious No theatres, tradesmen’s shops, or either’s apparently careful customers are more tricking or tricked by appearances than anything else in our entire age is. This comment on fraudulent appearances, in other words, is the essential fact of life in a city comedy. The convoluted statement is typical of Jonsonian constructions of rapid speech with extra thoughts or examples tucked in as the speaker progresses.
44 cheated tricked; OED, 3a, first cites Milton, Comus (1634), 155: ‘To cheat the eye with blear illusion’, but this usage ante-dates it.
44 appearances] F2 (apparences)
45 shop-lights small or high windows allowing poor light into shops (OED, 9d); hence false or deceiving lights from windows, so regulated by shopkeepers as to trick purchasers; cf. Stubbes, Anatomy of Abuses (1583), 2.24: ‘Then have they their shops and places where they sell their cloth commonly very dark and obscure, of purpose to deceive the buyers. But caveat emptor (as the old saying is), let the buyers take heed’; and Middleton, Michaelmas Term, 2.3, stating of merchants: ‘’Tis always misty weather in our shops here; we are a nation the sun never shines upon’ (H&S). Cf. ‘Inigo Marq.’, 6.381, lines 9–10.
45 than th’age ’s than the age is. See 44–6n. above. On this textual crux, H&S (6.503) argue that any correction here was likely to be dubious: they don’t see the point of ‘th’Ages’, nor do they accept ‘th’Age is’, because they cannot explain the immediately following plural reference to ‘folk in them’. Their conclusion is that ‘the text appears to be corrupt’. If, however, ‘folk in them’ refers to audiences in theatres, and not folk in the ages (which makes little sense), then the reference is clear enough.
45 than th’age ’s] this edn; then th’Ages F2; see note
46 curious careful as to standards of excellence, especially in matters of taste (OED, 2).
46–7 oracle, wisest woman Complimentary terms for a witch, cunning-woman, or wise-woman.
48 tipped . . . reasons sharpened her speech with persuasive justifications, like arrow tips.
49 turn persuade.
49,56 SDs] this edn; not in F2
50 to penance to do penance, to perform an act of self-mortification or undergo a penalty as an expression of penitence.
55 such a name such an offensive or hurtful name.
56 rehearsals repetitions, recapitulations (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME), going over the same ground.
57–8 — you . . . a —] This edn; parentheses in F2
58 proverb Tilley, S862: ‘The more you stir the more you stink.’ Cf. Und. 21.10.
60 handles two or more ways in which something may be understood. Chair means that time will heal their differences and help them to understand each other.
60 SD] G; not in F2
4.8 ] F2 (Act IV. Scene VIII.)
0 SD] Wilkes; Interest, with his Foot-boy. To them Compasse. Ironside. / Silkeworme. Palate. Pleasance. To them the / Lady: and after Practise. F2
4.8 4 lusty (1) merry, ‘vigorous, lively’ (Bullokar, 1616, LEME), especially for music and festivities, like the ironic celebration by drunken bell-ringers called for in 1–2 above; (2) pleasant, as an offshoot of Placentia’s name (see The Persons that Act, 4); (3) lustful, the son being like the mother. See OED, 1b, 2, 4.
4 SD.1,2] G; not in F2
5 at during (OED, 29).
8 chopping strapping, as applied to a fine healthy child; cf. lusty, 4 above; but also a reminder of ‘by-chop’ (4.7.24).
10 ope . . . round Maliciously linking the baby’s open mouth and a compass’s circle as a sign of the father (assumed to be Compass).
11 fame rumour.
12 Hath Who has.
12 honour Ironic for ‘dishonour’.
13 pump out conceive; crudely comparing sexual ejaculation with pumping out bilge-water on a ship (Florio, 1598, LEME); cf. Alch., 4.3.44.
13 pump] Wh; pompe F2
14–15 inherit . . . least An illegitimate child inherited nothing by right. Lady Loadstone may choose to leave something to this ‘heir’, though Interest clearly will not.
15 SD Compass’s entrance may be earlier than this line, perhaps shortly after Lady Loadstone’s at line 4, but unobserved by Interest. Compass has to hear enough of Interest’s heavy-handed sarcasm to respond angrily on the lady’s behalf.
15 SD] G; not in F2
16 witness Puritan word for godparent; cf. ‘they will not be called godmothers’, Bart. Fair, 1.3.100–1. Interest’s dead sister Mrs Steel and Lady Loadstone’s gossip Polish were both identified as puritans in 1.4–5.
16 partner as a godparent.
17 horn spoon cheap spoon made of horn instead of the conventional two silver apostle-spoons given as a christening gift (see Bart. Fair, 1.3.77).
17 treen dish bowl made of wood, or ‘tree’.
18 badges ‘Signs, marks, or tokens of honour, whereby every estate or great authority is known . . . badges or arms of gentlemen’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME); ironic here, since Interest sees the spoon and dish as signs of the infant’s destiny to become a beggar or vagrant. Vagrants had the letter V fastened on their breasts as badges of negative status (Peck).
19 dame the doxy madam slut (Happé); cf. Alch., 3.3.23.
19 march . . . circuit Prostitutes and adultresses were made to walk round the parish tied behind a cart, as a humiliation ritual, usually accompanied by drumming, and sometimes by whipping. The circular figure may also be a dig at Compass.
20 With bag and baggage Literally, with all their possessions; originally a military phrase covering a successfully accomplished retreat, as in ‘march out with bag and baggage’ (OED, Bag 20), but here clearly signalling a disreputable exit from the family, with good riddance to undesirables. Middleton uses the expression with similar implications of ejecting the unworthy in the 1620 citation. The phrase was also slang for scrotum and its contents; cf. WT, 1.2.204.
21 Envious Malicious.
21 eats . . . thee Envy is traditionally pictured by Ripa and others as eating her own heart; see Gilbert (1969), 88. Jonson comments on the cannibalistic nature of envious man in Carlo’s discourse on pork, EMO, 5.3.113ff.
22 frets gnaws (OED, v.1 2 and 3).
22 her Lady Loadstone’s.
22 sustains thy being supports you, gives you room and board.
23 own acknowledge.
23 thy brotherhood (1) your fellowship in a city company or guild (OED, 4); (2) state of being a brother to Lady Loadstone; (3) courtesy title, used ironically (OED, 3).
24 But as Except that.
24 title claim, legal right.
25 insult on triumph over.
26 vex thus for be thus vexed over.
27 lady!] G; Lady, F2
28 Thou Sir Moth Interest.
28 corroding eating into; possibly a pun on corrody, the right of free quarters or provisions from a lord or religious house (cf. 22n. above). On the connection between corrosion, moths, and hoarding up treasure, see Matthew 6:19.
32 SD.2–3] this edn; expanded from mass entry at start of scene in F2; see notes.
31 you ha’ whom you have.
32 I know . . . do I may not be able to control my actions (in the light of your groundless accusation). The implication is a threat either of violence or of legal action, but his revenge is to force Interest to hear the truth at 46ff. below.
32 Come in This welcome is a planned call to the others as witnesses, who offer a solid phalanx of support to Lady Loadstone.
33 32 SD.2 Pleasance does not speak in the scene, but Compass presents her to Lady Loadstone at 61.
34 too late all too recently.
41–4 Compass’s explicit sexual imagery plays on the magnetic attraction between Ironside and Lady Loadstone.
41 to boot in addition.
43 brace pair.
43 Persian carpets Covers for tables, benches, or walls; here, a bed. Floors were strewn with rushes.
47 Who . . . worse You (Interest) who will put up with it even less happily than Lady Loadstone.
52 Redintegrate Restore, make whole again (redintegro,–are, Lat.).
53 render produce, restore.
54 unvitiated unspoiled (OED, first citation).
56 practice trick, device.
63 politic tell-truth bias. Cf. 2.6.121–32.
64 daughter] F2 (Daughter state 2); Daugh (state 1)
65 Goody Goodwife, respectful address to lower-class women, but dismissive here, in tune with ‘Grannam’ (66). Cf. 2.2.26n., 5.6.10, and 5.10.82. Jonson attempted to show the word’s origin and abbreviation in this line by spelling it Goodwy’ (see collation note), but the pronunciation would have ignored the ‘w’, and the modern spelling here is consistent with the early modern spellings of the word elsewhere in the play.
65 Goody] G (goody); Goodwy’ F2
70 If I but Providing that.
72 lady, lady H&S mention several possible sources for this fairly common refrain: ‘There dwelt a man in Babylon’, TN., 2.3.80, also quoted in Wiv.; and ‘song, to the tune of King Solomon’ in Pickering’s Horestes (1567), echoed in The Trial of Treasure (1567). See Happé (1991), 88–9, 92–3.
74 ’bate . . . harington allow you one brass farthing. Proverbial: ‘not worth a harington’ (Dent, H178). See 2.6.101n. and Devil, 2.1.83.
75 interest upon interest even charging interest upon the interest. The echo of Sir Moth’s name is derisive, emphasizing Compass’s victory over the usurer.
77 Rudhudibras See 3.2.26 and note.
78 ransom price of freedom for a captive: more derisive rhetoric, suggesting heroic military or romance scenarios, rather than the sordidly financial.
79 possibility particular conditions under which your accusations occurred.
81,87 SDs] G; not in F2
86 satisfaction Double-edged: (1) atoning for damage to his honour in a duel (OED, 4); (2) seeking pecuniary compensation in a court of law (OED, 1a). Compass knows the former suggestion is unlikely; cf. 3.3.30ff.
87 right truth, correct version of the story.
Chorus 4 ] this edn; Chorus. F2
Chorus 4 1 labour . . . longing exert myself with the same desire (for the truth). The metaphor continues the motif of pregnancy and childbirth, to which Damplay objected (Chorus 3).
2 puckered twisted over upon itself, tangled. Cf. the metaphor of plot as a skein of silk (Ind. 103–8), whose threads might pucker with misunderstanding. See the Boy’s parenthetical reference at 6 below.
4 perplexed (1) bewildered by the intricacies of the situation, as applied to a person; (2) entangled, intertwined, as applied to a thing. See OED, 1, 3.
5 expect wait.
6 happen on chance to find or lay hold of (OED, 4b).
8 parts roles. The theatrical term indicates the importance of audience participation in the play.
9 process progress of actions going on; course of the plot (OED, 1, 3).
9 events course of events; whatever is happening and the consequences.
10 corruptly perverting the integrity of the poet’s artistic conception.
11 fitted prepared.
12–14 not . . . gentleman The metaphor compares the potter’s craft to the poet’s art, and suggests that the purchaser of pots or plays should not interfere with the manufacturing of the product. Rather, he should adopt an attitude suitable to his class, and become a connoisseur of fine things.
12 beslaver . . . spittle drool out our own concepts with fault-finding spit.
12 beslaver] H&S; beslave F2
13 as as if.
13 plastic modeller in clay, moulder or sculptor; figuratively, creator (OED, Plastic, sb.2 obs).
15 on foot in progress.
15 thread Cf. 2–7 above and Ind. 103ff.
20 figure-flinging astrological forecasting.
21 was that was.
22 catastrophe final event of a drama; denouement, or unravelling of the plot; not necessarily disastrous. In EMO, Jonson used the term to refer only to the final scene, not the whole last act.
22 cheat unexpected twist of the plot; cf. 4.7.44n.
23 convenient appropriate.
25 unpointed without clear purpose; literally and grammatically, without a point or period to mark the meaning, making it comprehensible.
27 wit . . . part may the poet play his part by entertaining us with his wit.
5.1 ] F2 (Act V. Scene I.)
0 SD] G; Needle. Item. F2
5.1 2 engine device, invention (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
3 He’s] F2 (H’has)
3 aspersions false insinuations (OED, 6). Needle supports the scheme planned earlier by the midwife to hide the fact of birth in order to preserve Placentia’s good name. On the fragility of female reputation, J. Cotgrave, Wit and Language (1655), writes: ‘Women’s fames / Are like thin crystal glasses, by a breath / Blown into excellent form, and by a touch / Cracked, or quite broken’ (101).
7 SH needle] Wh; Ite. F2
8 You] F2 (Yo’)
8 drunk . . . water shared the same pool of information. Proverbial (Tilley, W98).
9 gave it out broadcast it.
11 SH item] Wh; Iem F2
11 SH needle] Wh; not in F2
12–13 Early modern equivalents of smelling salts.
12 goose-feathers Cf. 1.3.17 and note, and 3.3.62.
12 asafoetida Literally, stinking gum, a resin from central Asia used as an antispasmodic.
16 urinal-judgement ability to diagnose by examining urine in a glass vessel; see 3.4.66n.
16 cracked (1) crashed, broken asunder (Cotgrave, 1611, and Palsgrave, 1530, LEME), applied to the glass of the urinal; (2) crazy (OED, 5); (3) flawed (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME), damaged, applied to reputation (see 3n. above).
17 Cracked . . . case Invalidated as a diagnosis, and hence invalidating Rut as a physician; see 3.6.20n. where a similar rhetoric was deployed against Placentia; and 31 below.
19 Under a cloud In trouble, out of favour (OED, 10b, first cited in 1500).
20 committed to in the custody of.
23 this] G; his F2
25 toy whim, fancy; trifle (Palsgrave, 1530. LEME).
25 toy,] F3; toy; F2
25 comes that comes.
25 noddle head or imagination, but playfully suggesting silliness (OED, 3).
27 distemper medical disorder, mental or physical; associated with being ‘out of humour’, in former medieval physiology (OED, n.1 3 and 4).
28 walking . . . talking ‘Supernatural dreams . . . may happen without being precisely sent from God, and their cause comes not only by the sole deprivation of humours, as natural dreams do, but by the ravishment of the spirit, which wakes while the body reposeth, and which being oftentimes holpen by the inspiration of some good Angel or Genius, doth represent by such dreams things which commonly come to pass’ (Vaughan, Directions for Health, 1629, 163). According to The Secrets of Albertus Magnus, a popular sixteenth-century compilation of anonymous writings, frequently republished and consulted as a quasi-medical scientific text: ‘If thou wilt that a man sleeping tell thee what he hath done’, a loadstone placed near him will cause him to confess (C6r).
29 idly incoherently, ‘tell[ing] a foolish, fabulous, or unlikely tale’ (Cotgrave, LEME).
29 on’t] Happé; on’it F2
30–1 raise . . . reputation restore his reputation as a physician (by seeming to restore his patient).
32 worship honour, good name.
32 SD] G; not in F2
5.2 ] F2 (Act V. Scene II.)
0 SD] this edn; Polish. Pleasance. Chaire. Placentia. Keepe. F2
5.2 1 Gi’ you joy Appropriate saying to the newly wed (H&S). Cf. 5.10.23.
1 Mademoiselle This apparently polite address is derisive here; in any case, she means ‘Madame’.
2 whirlpool (1) literally, vortex of twisting water (Thomas, 1587, LEME), or a kind of whale (Cotgrave, LEME); (2) figuratively, ‘magic of a siren’ (Cotgrave, 1655, 306); cf. EMO, 2.2.160–5, in which Macilente wishes he were turned into a ‘fair water-nymph, that, set upon / The deepest whirlpit of the rav’nous seas, / My adamantine eyes might headlong hale / This iron world to me, and drown it all’; hence, destructive, engulfing agency (OED, 1b). Polish sees Pleasance as a negative version of the magnetic power represented by her aunt, drawing Compass to her with turbulent, disorienting sexuality: ‘Trust not a woman . . . they have the virtue / Of loadstones, shut up in a box; they’ll draw / Customers to them’ (Cotgrave, 1655, 305).
2 all-to-be-married thoroughly married (OED, All, 15): cf. ‘all-to-kissed’, 13 below.
3 Against . . . leave Pleasance’s marriage angers her ‘mother’ Polish only because, as the putative parent, she might have prevented it, had she known of its prospect and its threat to her real daughter. Her concern as a mother is to confirm Placentia’s marriage; cf. 5.10.23ff.
4 He’s] F2 (H’has)
4 fished . . . frog made a poor catch. Proverbial (Dent, F767): ‘you fish fair and catch a frog’; cf. East. Ho!, 4.2.89. See 5.7.47n. for connections to Frog Prince fairy tales: Polish implies a gender-reversed version, a frog-princess who is not worth marrying and transforming back to human shape, since she has no official standing or wealth.
5 in dower as dowry, the money or property given by the wife to the husband on marriage.
7 discover reveal. That is, Pleasance has witnessed the birth of Placentia’s infant, a fact that Polish thinks has been successfully hidden, although the audience knows that Compass found out that secret among others in 4.4; hence, his rapid marriage to Pleasance.
9 take order take measures or steps to prevent it (OED, Order 14).
10 Ember Week Designates a period of fasting (Wed., Fri., and Sat.) in one ember week at the start of each season (from ymbyrne OE, period, revolution of time). Since the Council of Placentia, ad 1095, ember weeks follow (1) first Sunday in Lent; (2) Whitsunday; (3) Holy Cross Day, 14 Sept.; (4) St Lucia’s Day, 13 Dec. Traditionally, the relation between the week’s devotional fast and the season is that ‘the whole and each division of it might be blest by it’ (Blount, 1656, LEME). The ‘ember’ associates Pleasance punningly with the Cinderella story (see Introduction).
11 The abstention from consumption of flesh in Ember Week has sexual implications here.
11 SD.1, 2] G; not in F2
12–13 ] verse in Wh; prose in F2
12 She’s] F2 (she’has)
13 all-to-kissed soundly kissed; cf. 2n. above.
14 viewed her linen inspected her bed-linen (OED, 3a); evidence that the laundress has done her job as promised (4.7.30–1), leaving no sign of recent childbirth. The words are italicized in F2, perhaps urging special emphasis or attention for the actor or reader. But midwives had abundant supplies of linen to give women who were unprepared or poor; statistically, the midwife’s husband was most frequently a clothier (Evenden, 2000, 117).
14 viewed her linen] italics in F2
15 miracle The word is a reminder that Mother Chair is both midwife and wise-woman, credited with apparently supernatural resources.
18 four-pound beaver hat Hat made from beaver fur, probably describing the price rather than the weight. Happé cites the Wife of Bath’s ‘coverchiefs’ which weighed ten pounds (Chaucer, ‘General Prol.’, 454); H&S interpret ‘pound’ as money (Pepys’s hat cost £4.5s, cited in OED for 1661) a more likely reading in line with other clothing costs cited in EMO and Alch. Cf. Linthicum, 229. Henrietta Maria paid £4 for a ‘fine black beaver hat’ in Oct. 1632 (PRO LR5/65).
20 right genuine (OED, 17c).
21 Crystal . . . rock Rock-crystal, a transparent quartz, once thought to have been petrified water or ‘congealed ice by continuance frozen whole years’ (OED, 2a, citing Maplet, 1557).
23 pace walk in a stately manner.
24 fifty daughters Grateful clients or daughters she has helped to deliver, signs of her professional authority; cf. Heywood, The Wise Woman of Hoxton, in which Mother Midnight (common cant-name for a midwife/cunning-woman: see 5.4.14) similarly calls the local young women her ‘daughters’.
25 To church After childbirth, women had to wait a period of time (usually four weeks) before being ritually readmitted to church services. This procession may be an accompaniment to such a churching, an important social occasion for women; one of the duties of a midwife was to see to the churching of the mother. See Evenden (2000), 30–3, and Cressy (1997), 197–224.
27 pieces (1) coins; (2) fragments.
27 maidenhead virginity; in this context, what a prince would pay to ensure that his sexual partner was an intact virgin. See Middleton, A Mad World, My Masters, in which Frank Gullman sells her maidenhead several times over to make her fortune.
28 charge i.e. Placentia: cf. 1.4.11n.
29, 30 ] verse in Wh; prose in F2
30 SD] G; not in F2
5.3 ] F2 (Act V. Scene III.)
0 SD] this edn; Compasse. Ironside. Practise. F2
5.3 1–4 Although Compass alternates his address between second and third person, he is continually addressing Master Practice directly. Because the lawyer is infuriated that he has been tricked out of marrying Pleasance, he is not at first ready to be bought off. He does, however, accept the offer of a political post at line 16 and confirms it by line 23 below.
2 injury wrongful action; violation of rights.
3 chafèd irritated, rubbed the wrong way; cf. Shr., 2.1.243.
4–5 head, / . . . laws!] this edn; head! / . . . lawes. F2
7 mind (1) bend your attention to, focus all your energies upon (OED, 7a); (2) be concerned about, negatively implying that you have better things to do (OED, 8a).
10 make over transfer, assign.
10 possession exclusive control over or enjoyment of a thing by a person, or by another in that person’s name (OED, 1b). Possession in law, which is a legal right to something, is not always the same as actual possession, which is a state of fact or in deed. Hence the quibbles of 17–20 over possession, legal and actual, or reversion, which is merely potential possession (see 4.6.16n.). ‘Surrender in deed is that which is really and sensibly performed; surrender in law is in intendment of law, by way of consequent and not actual’ (Blount, 1656, LEME).
11 place appointment to an official position (see 12–13 below).
11 is fallen which has ‘fallen void, as an office or a benefice or any other room by the death of them that had it’ (Palsgrave, LEME); which has come as my lot or legal right (OED, 31).
11 to satisfy to satisfy you (‘make you amends’, 1).
11 satisfy:] this edn; satisfie F2
12 Surveyor . . . general See 1.7.74n.
15 ends goals, objectives.
15 gowned man lawyer.
17 possession . . . reversion See 10n. above. Whether Thinwit (see 4.6.16) is already dead or merely dying, Practice will treat the right as irrefutable.
17 possession] F2 (P ssession)
18–19 Ay, / I] G; I, / I F2
19 All is one It is all the same.
21 general release Document confirming the transfer of a right to another, without exception or proviso. This document would protect Compass from later prosecution if Practice did not succeed, for some reason, to Thinwit’s position.
22 one . . . other Documents making over the possession (10) and the release (21).
23 Before . . . Ironside With Ironside as witness.
23 ’Tis done This verbal agreement (legally binding) may be accompanied by a handshake.
24 reconciled restored to friendship and harmony (see the play’s subtitle).
25 any half title even half a claim (see 17n. above) which can be exploited legally.
27 velvet] this edn; Vellute F2
27 cut-work smocks Women’s undergarments or shifts trimmed with fashionable open-work embroidery (OED, Cut-work 2b); metonymically and pejoratively, fashionable women (cf. OED, Smock 1c).
28 occupy . . . wholly concern himself entirely and solely with the performance of his duty; with some sexual equivocation on ‘occupy’ (Partridge, 1947, 155) and thus mocking the substitution of work for pleasure; cf. ‘A captain! God’s light, these villains will make the word as odious as the word “occupy”, which was an excellent good word before it was ill sorted’ (2H4, 2.4.114–16). Cf. Discoveries, 1098–1100, ‘Many, out of their own obscene apprehensions, refuse proper and fit words, as “occupy”, “nature”, and the like.’
29 nearer (1) more privately; (2) regarding something that affects me more closely.
30 wife’s] F2 (wives)
33 choke-bail Legal device for preventing bail being allowed by demanding the deposit of an impossibly large sum (OED, Choke- 2, citing this usage first). Such demands were one of the ways of avoiding Habeas Corpus, a matter of concern to Chief Justice Coke under James I. The abuse caused much wrangling through the seventeenth century and eventually was restrained in the Bill of Rights, 1689 (Happé).
35 sureties Those who give Interest credit for the bail and make themselves liable for any default, should Interest not appear in court for trial (OED, 7).
5.4 ] F2 (Act V. Scene IV.)
0 SD] Happé; Interest. Lady. Rut. Item.
1 I’m] Wh; I’am F2
5.4 1 brogue (1) cheat, fraud, trick (OED, n.1); (2) escheat, forfeit of an estate due to ‘illegitimation of bastards’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME). Interest assumes Placentia is no longer marriageable because she is a bastard-bearer, and thus she is no longer eligible to receive the dowry or pass on the estate to a legitimate heir of her body. F2’s ‘Rogue’ may be a printer’s error. If Jonson actually wrote ‘rogue’, then possibly he meant ‘discreditable gossip’, based
1 on verbal idioms from 1678 and 1685 meaning ‘To cast discredit on (something)’ (OED, Rogue, v. 2†b. Obs.), but there is no evidence that a noun-usage with this sense was recognized in 1632, or indeed at any time. Whalley’s substitution, ‘vogue’, has the now-obsolete meaning ‘the foremost place in popular repute, the greatest currency’ (OED, †1), but does not express either Interest’s usual fear of losing money by superior chicanery, or his usual attempt to bypass or twist the law. Cotgrave, echoed by Blount (1656, LEME), defines ‘vogue’ as ‘sway, swinge, authority, power, clear passage, as of a ship in a broad sea’; it is not clear that the French word was in current English use in these senses, although the marine metaphor is plausible here. Other plausible substitutions for ‘rogue’, such as ‘noise’ or ‘voice’, cannot easily support an argument of a printer’s misreading the autograph manuscript hand, or creating the error by the omission of a letter.
1 brogue] this edn; Rogue F2; vogue Wh
2 got begot.
4 He’s] F2 (H’has)
6 leap copulate with (Partridge, 1947, 133); cf. ‘If I could win a lady at leapfrog . . . I should quickly leap into a wife’ (H5, 5.2.30–3).
6 Again On the other hand.
9 family household.
11, 23 SDs] in right margin in F2
14 Mother Midnight Generic familiar term for midwife, or cunning-woman; cf. Heywood’s The Wise Woman of Hoxton (1638), I4r.
16 noise rumour, as at 18 below; punning contrast to ‘still’ (15).
16 since, she since that Placentia.
17 getting begetting, getting with child (Florio, 1598, LEME).
19 pimp errant wandering pimp, but ‘errant’ puns on (1) doing wrong, and (2) wandering like a heroic knight (Happé).
20 smock affairs women’s private matters; cf. 4.7.41n. and 5.3.27n.
21 infirm sick.
25 perfect sound.
26 sensibly clearly, so as to be easily understood (OED, 3a).
26 as as if.
27 SH interest] this edn; Rut. F2
28 ] this edn; Hee’ll tell us wonders: What do these women here? F2
5.5 ] F2 (Act V. Scene V.) / Scene division, F2 ; G has continuous action with the entry after 5.4.27; H&S, Wilkes and Happé begin 5.5 at 5.4.28
0 SD] this edn; Rut. Needle. Interest. Item. Lady. Polish. Chaire. / Keepe. Placentia. F2
1 SH] Wh; not in F2
1 fine beagles hounds that work in packs, noted for their skill in scenting prey and their resonant voices; here pejorative, as in ‘Oh, you’re goodly beagles!’ (EMO, 5.2.102).
2 doucets testicles of a deer, considered ‘sweet morsels’, or delicacies (Sad Shep., 1.6.7, cited in OED, 3).
2 breeks breeches, here a kind of underwear. Needle’s modest protest that his genitals are covered responds to Rut’s claim about the women’s desire to have his testicles; unclear whether he means they wish to emasculate Needle or to have sex with him.
5 he wakes] F2; ( he’wakes)
5 presently at once.
8 Indian (1) Exotically beautiful, like Titania’s Indian boy in MND, or (2) distractingly or deceptively beautiful, like ‘the beauteous scarf, / Veiling an Indian beauty . . . The seeming truth which cunning times put on / To entrap the wisest’ in MV, 3.2.98–101, and thus a figure of dissimulation (see next note); (3) exotically expensive, or acquisitive, obtained through East Indian trade; cf. the proverb, ‘Dear bought and far fetched are dainties for ladies’ (Tilley, D12).
8 magpie Common European bird in the crow family, given to noisy chatter and habits of pilfering and hoarding; generally regarded as a bird of ill-omen. OED, 1 cites Peachum, who associates the bird with the emblem of ‘Dissimulation: A lady wearing a vizard of two faces . . . in her right hand a magpie’.
10 Hear you?] parenthetical in F2
12 bill beak, continuing the magpie analogy, although her name, given at 16 below, is Parrot.
12–13 holes . . . earth Jonson used the comic idea of burying money to safeguard it in Case, 4.7.134–8, and EMO, 1.3.122–5, in both of which plays the ‘earth’ in question is a muckhill, proverbially an image of hoarded wealth (Dent, M1071). See 5.7.64.
14 glow-worm’s light shining green light emitted by the female.
16 Parrot’s . . . speaker Ironic and oxymoronic; Parrot is a name applied contemptuously to a person given to unintelligent mechanical repetition of speech (OED, 2); ‘Prattling like a parrot (say we)’ (Cotgrave, 1587, LEME); ‘parrots’ language . . . [is] gibberish or the fustian tongue’ (Florio, 1598).
17 clothing livery of a company (OED, 2d): cf. Alch., 1.3.36.
17 bevy Originally, company of ladies or of birds (quails, larks). Later applied to a company of any kind; cf. Althorp: ‘A bevy of fairies’, 20.
18 scarlet Rich cloth often of bright red, but sometimes green or blue; used for ceremonial dress (OED, 1a, 3); red cloth was sometimes used to bandage patients in medical cures.
19 colours Punning on colours as rhetorical modes or figures, ornaments of style or diction, or mere embellishments (OED, n.1 13, pl.).
20 run thee over repeat or recite quickly, tell over again (OED, 67c). Rut’s object here is to silence Polish before her vociferousness overwhelms Needle’s story about the buried money, told to keep Interest’s attention before Rut effects a cure of Needle.
20 lights (1) glow-worm lights; cf. 15n. above; (2) pieces of information or discoveries (OED, 6a).
21 Dolittle Lane Small passage between Knightrider Street and Carter Lane, south of St Paul’s. The street-name suggests the idleness of the dweller; but Middleton mentions it in praise of a local wise-woman (Family of Love, 5.3.366–8). Cf. Christmas, 104 (Chalfant, 1978, 68–9).
22 after in the style of.
22 Sir Chime Squirrel’s From a type of rolling squirrel’s cage with chiming bells, still in use for exercising hamsters and gerbils: it allows pets to run and climb without escaping.
23 almonds treat for a pet; cf. 5.7.42.
25 purge cathartic or aperient medicine which causes evacuation of the bowels.
25 tale A crude medical pun: (1) Polish’s uncontrollable flow of storytelling; (2) tail or posterior, by means of which the bowels are purged of wastes.
25 SD Happé locates this exit at line 20, but keeping the characters onstage increases the scope of comic stage business. The placement at 26 allows time for Needle’s stage business of ‘seeing’ events before his exit, effected because he does not want all his audience distracted by a quarrel. Occupied by bickering with Polish, Rut does not even notice Needle’s exit (see 41–2 below).
25 SD] G (subst.) placed after before (line 15); not in F2
5.5 29 This scene parodies Lady Macbeth’s sleepwalking scene (Mac., 5.1), but Needle, unlike Lady Macbeth, hears and responds to comments made by the observers.
30 plaster bandage for local application of medicine, here used as a collective noun for promises to give remedies (like a charm of birds or a pride of lions).
31 distil purify a liquid by heating and condensing for medical purposes. No matter how purely Rut’s oath (such as ‘damn me’) is distilled ‘drop by drop’, he cannot remedy the misdiagnosis that is costing Placentia such loss of reputation.
32–4 That . . . her As for your accusations that she has had a child, here she defies (or refutes) you by spitting on you, or I do it in her place.
33 spit . . . defy Either linked by custom, or proverbial, as Happé points out: ‘I do defy him, and I spit at him’ (R2, 1.1.60), and ‘as she spit in his face, so she defied him’ (MM, 2.1.75–6).
34–5 bind . . . behaviour force her to behave properly. Cf. ‘Tie . . . up’ (35), another metaphor of physical constraint (see next note).
36 Bedlam The hospital for the insane in the parish of Bishopsgate Without on the north-eastern edge of the city of London. Patients were constrained (cf. 34–5 above) to prevent violence.
38 charm magic trick, witch’s incantation.
40 oracle Needle, given magical credit by Rut as a foreteller. Polish clearly is not taken in.
42 tabor beating out the same tune, or persistent repetition of her verbal attack (OED, v. 2, and Drum v. 8); literally, drum.
43–4 You . . . speak You must permit those who have suffered a loss to have their opportunity to talk; proverbial, as in Tilley, L458: ‘Give losers leave to speak’. Cf. Und. 2.3.21–2.
44 his footing Needle’s track (OED, 2).
45 SD] this edn; not in F2
5.6 ] F2 (Act V. Scene VI.)
0 SD] G; Compasse. Practise. Ironside. Polish. Lady. F2
5.6 2 Gossip . . . counsels Female member (derisive diction) of Lady Loadstone’s private advisers. Cf. 2.5.3n. and 2.5.53n.
2 counsels?] Counsels? F2 state 2; Counsels. state 1
7 suspected . . . afresh i.e. put into doubt again the evidence that Pleasance is the true niece, entitled to the dowry and to Lady Loadstone’s protection.
10 Goody Equivalent to ‘Gossip’, playing on ‘good at’ in the next line, and thus converting ‘good’ to evil in 11–12 below. Cf. 2.2.26 and 4.8.65 and notes.
10 Goody] F3; goo’dy F2
12 throughly thoroughly.
14 sweep (1) circular course or range of movement of the compass needle in a mariner’s compass; (2) extent of influence or power (OED, 14). Lady Loadstone adds a household pun declaring her own domestic power at 15 below, sweep with a broom.
15 spring . .  (1) cause (usually a bird, but here Pleasance) to appear from cover; OED, 18 notes figurative use in Bart. Fair, 5.6.17; (2) burst, or break (usually a mast of a ship, but here Polish’s plans). See OED, 4 and 19.
15 this,] Wh; this. F2
16 ground.] F3; ground, F2
16 have her cried raise a hue and cry to locate her. Cf. ‘raise hue and cry i’the Hundred’ (Tub, 2.2.94).
17 common crier town crier, official who makes public announcements.
17 ward district of London under the jurisdiction of an alderman.
20 integrity soundness, right dealing (Cockeram, 1623, LEME).
20 SD] G; not in F2
5.7 ] F2 (Act V. Scene VII.)
0 SD] Happé; Rut. Interest. Item. Needle. F2
5.7 1 fly (1) household pest (cf. ‘buzz’); (2) compass card which moves on a pivot to indicate direction in relation to the needle on a magnetic compass; (3) malicious demonic spirit or familiar attached to a witch.
2 blows (1) deposits eggs, as a fly; cf. Oth., 4.2.66 (OED, 28); (2) blusters, fumes (OED, 6); (3) arouses discord (OED, 18).
3 busy meddlesome, prying (OED, 5); also echoing the irritating ‘buzz’.
3 grievance cause of suffering. Cf. Rom., 1.1.148.
4–5 Cf. Mac., 5.1.59–60: ‘doctor Will she now go to bed? / gentlewoman Directly.’
4 he Needle. Interest is impatient to hear about the money.
8 ascent Fumes were thought to rise from the stomach into the brain (Peck); see Burton, Anatomy, 1.3.3.1.
9 up,] this edn; up; F2
10 brain,] this edn; braine; F2
10 pricking smarting or tingling; anxiety-producing, stirring the conscience (OED, 1b, c).
11 rest (which] this edn; rest, which F2
11–12 sons / Of physic practitioners of the art of medicine. ‘The pompous title is neatly set off by the enjambment’ (Happé).
12 sleep)] this edn; sleepe, F2
13 telling mysteries (1) foretelling hidden truths or personal secrets (OED, 5a, b); (2) revealing mystical meanings (OED, 7).
13 must be heard are so compelling that they must be true.
13 heard –] this edn; heard. F2
14 as as if.
14–15 sewing . . . elbows tending to the comfort of the patients (Florio, 1598, LEME, refers to ‘a cushion whereon the elbow leaned at suppertime’). Proverbial (Tilley, P329, citing this usage: ‘To sew pillows under one’s elbows’). OED, 1d suggests ‘giving a sense of false security’, and cites the Geneva Bible, Ezekiel, 13.18: ‘Woe to the women that sew pillows to all armholes’ after declaring, ‘Woe unto the foolish prophets that follow their own spirit and have seen nothing!’ (13.3), an attack on vanities and superficial supports misleading those who do not attend directly to God’s word. But this latter meaning makes more sense applied to Interest’s folly, rather than to Needle’s charade; Rut’s point seems literally to be that they should soothe, not startle, the patient, if they want to hear his story.
15 patients’ . . . they’d Rut moves rather confusingly into the plural, no longer talking just about Needle, but generalizing on the basis of medical experience with many patients.
15 elbows –] this edn; elbowes, F2
15–20 else . . . lost Rut’s commentary on frenzied patients is itself frenzied, full of overlapping details, phrases, and clauses. The action describes the results to be expected of startled patients: becoming frenzied, running into, amidst, and over locations, then falling, getting scratched, and finally leaping or slipping off a ledge to death. The description of terrifying noises in line 17 interrupts the story of the behaviour of frenzied patients, by adding details of howling pursuit, which exacerbates and precipitates the final disaster.
17 hallowings chases with shouts (OED, v.2 1a).
18 brakes thickets of bushes or briers; bracken.
18 furzes ground-covers, gorse or similar shrubs.
19 waters, scratch] this edn; waters: Scratch F2
19 flesh,] this edn; flesh: F2
20 SD] in right margin in F2 state 2; not in state 1
21 he Needle.
21 he] Wh; her F2
23 argument theme, subject. Cf. Ind. 103.
24 happy man lucky me; cf. 45 below. Possibly the reference is to Needle as ‘lucky person for me’.
24 off it put off talking about it (OED, 1: pre-dates first citation, 1642).
25 appetite craving (OED, 4b).
28 friends] this edn; friend’s F2
29 gratulate rejoice in; cf. Sej., 4.514.
32 is] F2 state 2; is, state 1
32 on . . . side with my lady; that is, in my lady’s chamber or part of the house.
35 SD] G; not in F2
36 Sooth In truth.
37 ladybird sweetheart; cf. Cynthia (Q), 2.4.5: ‘Is that your new ruff, sweet ladybird?’ (OED, 2).
39 Walk, knave, walk Proverbial (Tilley, K140).
40 you’re] F2 (y’are)
42 Almond for parrot Proverbial (Tilley, A220). Cf. 5.5.23. H&S cite Skelton on cajoling a parrot with ‘an almond or a date’.
42 brave pretty; a general term of approval, as at 2.1.10.
44 Edge-long On the edge, as though planting each coin in the earth.
45 O] Wh; O’ F2
45 me . . . creature The same problem as at 24 above: Sir Moth is most likely describing himself as ‘most fortunate person alive’; but he may mean that Lady Pol is a bird (‘creature’) of supremely good fortune, blessing him with treasure, or that Needle himself is the bearer of (news of) greatest fortune to Interest. In any case, he is giddy with delight.
47 I’the old well The idea of a healing well derives from Scottish (by way of German) folklore, as in ‘Wearie Well at the Warldis End’, or ‘The Well at the World’s End’, a version of the Frog Prince fairy tale, similar to ‘The Queen who sought a drink from a certain well’; cf. Campbell (1890), 2.33, 141–3. In the tale, a princess seeks the well-water to cure her mother; the frog fetches the water, provided the princess agrees to marry him. She agrees, then beheads the frog in the bridal chamber to avoid embraces; the frog turns into a handsome prince. See Polish’s oblique and inverted reference to this tale at 5.2.4. A healing well is one of the central elements of George Peele’s The Old Wives’ Tale (1595).
51 straight waist Literally, narrow-fitting corset; cf. ‘strait-bodied city attire’, Poet., 4.1.2–3; but here describing a city wife, usually ‘straight-laced’ or morally upright, even puritanical.
52 try test.
52 SD] G; not in F2
53 does,] this edn; does; F2
54 Assay Trial sample, specimen (OED, 17).
54 Assay] Happé; A’ssay F2
54 SD] this edn; not in F2
54 rare (1) unusual, exceptional; (2) colloquially, splendid, fine, sometimes used as an ironic intensifier. The early modern audience would appreciate this second meaning, rather than the first intended by Interest, since the audience knows the trick.
58 cleanse . . . pill purge; cf. 5.5.25n.
58 pease pea (earlier form).
59 issue (1) termination of his action (OED, 2); cf. ‘stop his mouth’; (2) medically, discharge of matter due to disease (OED, 4).
60 SD] G; not in F2
63 in . . . another so close you could not insert a finger between them.
64 dirt sticks This representation of filthy lucre is not as crude as in Case, in which the usurer digs up his gold hidden under excrement in his back garden. See 5.5.12–13n. above.
67 Machaon, Podalirius Sons of Aesculapius, physicians of the Greeks at Troy (Iliad, 2.731–2).
67 Aesculapius Roman God of medicine, son of Apollo.
68 golden beard Dionysius ordered that Aesculapius should be suitably so endowed with barbam auream, according to Valerius Maximus (1823), 1.137 (H&S).
70 livery Usually a suit of clothes (not a beard) allowed to a retainer or servant as a token by which he may be recognized (OED, 2a). In this comic instance, the physician is the master, and the apothecaries are his assistants who might wear signifying silver beards.
71 Belong to Who work for.
76 mould, clod surface garden soil (cf. 75 above) that may be readily broken up; lumps of earth.
81 To . . . three Three hundred thousand planted in the garden (43), with twice as much dropped down the well (46).
82 bench Collectively, the council, or persons who have the official right to occupy seats in the council (OED, 3a).
82 aldermanity body of aldermen (OED, 2 cites this usage as a comic imitation of ‘humanity’ or ‘admiralty’); possibly a Jonson coinage, though he uses the word differently in Staple, 3 Int., 7 (Happé). Cf. ‘Thou canst draw forth thy forces, and fight dry / The battles of thy aldermanity’ (Und. 44, 45–6).
83 Stripped . . . shirts (1) Divested of their official robes, as part of the ‘purchase’; (2) exposed as corrupted by bribes; (3) paraded naked (i.e. in their shirts) as a humiliation ritual, like the carting of prostitutes; cf. 4.8.19n.
86 Merchant Taylors Hall Located in Threadneedle Street in the City, famous for its banquets, entertaining prestigious guests like James I and the King of Denmark (Chalfant, 1978, 126).
86 Merchant] F3; Merchants F2
87 Street.] F3; street, F2
87 sign astrological message, drawn from Rut’s punning on Threadneedle Street.
90 I’d] F2 (Il’d)
91 orient brilliant, lustrous, radiant.
92 painted Sir Henry Wotton, in The Elements of Architecture (1624) 89, considered the painting of statues ‘an English barbarism’ (H&S), but statues in ancient Greece and Rome were also painted to appear lifelike.
93 subtle characterized by penetration, acumen, or discrimination, but Rut is sarcastic.
5.8 ] F2 (Act V. Scene VIII.)
0 SD] G; Interest. Bias. Rut. Palate. F2
5.8 3 credit reputation.
6 insolent offensively contemptuous of the rights and feelings of others (OED, 1).
7 He . . . on’t He has completely escaped blame for it.
9 drives proceeds, tends (OED, 27).
11 He’s] F2 (H’has)
13–14 walk . . . Forest Such a walk from Loadstone’s house near the old Exchange in the city to St John’s Wood in the north-west, on to Waltham Forest in Hertfordshire, and then back again to the Loadstone house would be about twenty-five miles (Chalfant, 1978, 191).
15 two-inch bridges (1) Probably narrow bridges composed of simple planks two inches thick; (2) possibly, narrow ‘banks cast between two meadows, or made in a fenny ground to pass over’ (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
16 fast ‘close shut together or shut fast’ (Palsgrave, 1530. LEME); not in OED in reference to eyes, but understood in ‘fast asleep’ (1d).
23 writings drawn articles of agreement drawn up.
24 sealed notarized.
25 not,] Wh; not F2
26 Now false Interest and Bias have not yet heard the evidence against Polish’s circle regarding baby-switching and concealment. They are too busy trying to get the best of each other in financial terms.
27 stand to insist upon.
28 whate’er] Wh; what ere F2
30 flaunting haughty, bragging, swaggering. Like ‘brave’ (29), the term also connotes ‘richly attired, sumptuously apparelled’ and the arrogance that goes with self-display (Cotgrave, 1587, LEME).
31 entail securing of an inheritance (OED, 2a).
36 larders storerooms where provisions (originally, meat) are kept.
37 bolting-tub where bran was sifted from grain.
37 tub,] F2 state 2; tub. state 1
38 furnace oven supplying moderate continuous heat for various domestic purposes such as drying herbs or fruit, making soap, and preparing home remedies.
39–40 Be . . . on’t If she is never heard of again, it won’t affect anything important, like the safety of the whole country.
42 Defalking Deducting; diminishing by cutting out a part (H&S).
42 garnish money money for extra expenses, usually requiring a newcomer to treat old hands with a drink or other extra (H&S). Here, Interest refers to the advance he paid Bias to set up his wooing of Placentia. See 4.3.14, 35.
44 SD] F2, in right margin
47 Assure Betroth; ‘promise or make fast’ (Palsgrave, 1530, and Cotgrave, 1611, LEME); ‘to plight faith and troth’ (Cooper, 1565, LEME). Interest specifically requests that the parson bring Bias and Placentia together, suggesting not simply that the parson carry a message of confirmation from the uncle, but also that he make it binding in the eyes of the church. Cf. 5.10.22n.
49 old former.
49 bottle-house buttery (Florio, 1598, Botteglieria); originally a place for storing liquor, but later including bread, butter, and other provisions in colleges especially. Since it is described as ‘old’, it seems currently to be either a scullery or a garbage dump (see 50 below).
50 trenchers plates or platters, originally wooden, later metal or earthenware (OED, 2).
51 him Compass.
52 SD] G; not in F2
5.9 ] F2 (Act V. Scene IX.)
0 SD] this edn; Compasse. Pleasance. Lady. Ironside. Practise. / Polish. Chaire. Keepe.&c. F2
5.9 0 SD.2 etc. This addition to the stage direction suggests the presence of supernumeraries, presumably servants who act as witnesses to Compass’s denunciation of Polish. For Jonson’s views on preferring ‘to behold the scene full, and relieved with variety of speakers to the end’, see EMO, 2.2.321–4.
3 Pretending Claiming.
5 power legal authority (OED, 5).
5 hag witch.
6 put . . . woman behaved unnaturally, unlike a woman. The expression reinforces the witch-image of one who has betrayed maternal instincts in giving away her own child as though it were a demon’s changeling.
7 sordid foul, corrupt, vile (Cotgrave, 1611, and Florio, 1598, LEME).
8 as . . . living as also the trust you had from the living.
12 Abused Imposed upon, deceived.
15 keep close keep secret.
15 impiety (1) wickedness (Florio, 1598, LEME); (2) failure of duty towards her child. Cf. pietas (Lat.), frequently used for obligation to one’s family (Happé).
17 cunning-man See 2.2.41n.
18 If . . . all If that’s all he has by way of evidence to support his allegations.
20 gossip.] F3; Gossip; F2
21 Polish dismisses Compass’s claims because he has no evidence of wrong-doing.
5.10 ] F2 (Act V. Scene X.)
0 SD] F2 (Enter to them running, Rut.)
5.10 0 SD Unlike earlier scenes that begin with massed entries of characters, scene 10 begins only with Rut running onstage to report Sir Moth’s accident to the eight speaking characters who remain onstage from scene 9. After his report, the movement of characters is marked in the margin of F2, indicating entrances, but not exits; cf. 2 SDn. below. The number onstage reaches at least seventeen characters, not including the supernumaries indicated by the ‘etc.’ in the massed entry of 5.9.
2 SD In order for Lady Loadstone to enter at line 14 below, as marked in the margin of F2, she must exit first. I conjecture that she would exit quickly here to be by Sir Moth’s side, since she has just asked anxiously (or perhaps incredulously) ‘Where? Where?’ her brother has apparently suffered a life-threatening accident, and has learned he is in the garden. Happé does not allow for her exit and re-entry, despite F2, although he uses the other marginalia to indicate entrances. See 14–15 and note below.
2 SD] this edn; not in F2
5 newly dropped just left to, recently settled upon; but punning on ‘just delivered to’ as in childbirth, thus suggesting a parallel venality between Placentia and Sir Moth. See Introduction.
7 SD] this edn; in right margin: Enter Silke-/worme. Iron-/side. Item. Needle, and / Interest. -Rut. F2
8 SH diaphanous] this edn, here and throughout this scene; Sil. F2 ; subsequent speech headings in this scene: Silk.
9 soused (1) soaked, drenched (OED, v1 3a); perhaps punning on (2) fallen heavily (OED, v.2 3).
10 The water saved his life because it broke his fall – a successful escape from death.
12 stay wait, delay.
13 o’clock] G; a Clock F2
14 retrograde (1) apparently moving in a direction contrary to normal astrological patterns (OED, 1); (2) opposed to human expectation, desire, or reason (OED, 5).
14 SD] this edn; Lady. in right margin in F2
14–15 I’the . . . bucket? This very pertinent question, ‘What on earth possessed you to get into that bucket?’, is marked in F2’s margin with Lady, indicating her return to the stage, in line with other marginal signals, and emphasizing her implied criticism of her brother’s behaviour.
16 quaere query, something to be asked (Lat.): cf. New Inn, 2.5.125.
16 of another time for answering at a more suitable time. Sir Moth avoids explanations, and immediately changes the subject.
19 timely at the opportune moment (both in the rescue, and in helping Sir Moth change the subject of conversation).
20–1 shake / Myself (1) shudder or quake my body in order to shed excess water, like a dog (OED, 6g); (2) ‘as one shaketh off or away from him a . . . matter that he would be rid of’ (Palsgrave, 1530, LEME).
21 world of vast quantity of.
22 wife Placentia. Technically, she is not married, although some ritual exchange of promises occurred after 5.8 (cf. ‘Assure’, 5.8.47n.), involving a betrothal agreement witnessed and blessed by the parson (cf. below, ‘affianced’, 24; and ‘contract’, 26).
22 SD] F2 (Bias. / Placentia. / Palate. in right margin, opposite lines 21–3)
23 bids . . . joy Cf. 5.2.1n.
27 ten thousand pounds Cf. 5.8.41.
28 looked for’t expected it.
31 SD varlet Sergeant; ‘marshall, one that doth arrest men’ (Florio, 1598, LEME); cf. EMI (Q), 4.4.52 and EMI (F), 4.9.59 (OED, 1d).
31 SD] Happé; Varlet. in right margin opposite lines 32–3, F2
33 at suit of at the instigation of.
34 entered legally registered.
39 captain’s Ironside’s bail or guarantee to join or underwrite Lady Loadstone’s.
43 tailor . . . trust Conventionally tailors’ bills were large and paid last, and tailors had to give considerable credit to their customers; but the bail is staggering in comparison to a debt to a tailor.
46 likes is willing to accept as security.
47 fain willingly.
49 fright-bail Cf. choke-bail, 5.3.33 and note.
50 apperil peril, risk: cf. Tub, 2.2.93 and Devil, 5.4.34.
51 SD] Wilkes (after line 52); not in F2
51 once on this one occasion.
53 worth the buckles Based on such proverbial statements of poverty as in Weakest Goeth to the Wall (1603), ‘My benefice doth bring me in no more / But what would hold bare buckle and thong together’ (OED, 1b).
54 clashes (1) engages in the conflict, despite the odds (OED, 4a). Essentially, he takes on the role of a second, or intermediary, as in a duel (cf. 57 below, ‘challenge’); (2) makes a noise. The word plays on military associations with clanking armour and battle skirmishes (Florio, LEME) and rudely suggests ‘the loud wrangling or jangling outcries of scolds, or scolding fellows; any extreme or horrible din’ (Cotgrave, LEME).
61 charity –] F2 state 2; charity state 1
62 bid ask for.
63 benevolence act of charity.
64 spit . . . basin Either literally as a sign of contempt; or in line with a French proverb cited by H&S, ‘cracher au bassin’, make an unwilling contribution under stress of public opinion.
66 will will offer (elliptical).
68 appeal will accuse (OED, 1c): cf. R2, 1.1.9.
69 You . . . gossip Polish and Keep, but the order is unclear. Polish is usually the gossip.
70 fallen mad Chair is now protesting the charge of murder, not the fact of childbirth. She only undertook to conceal the infant, not to kill it; cf. 4.7.23–4. See parallel to Heywood’s The Wise Woman of Hoxton, 3.1.
70 SD] in left margin, F2; not an entrance: Pleasance has been onstage since 5.9
70 SD Pleasance has been onstage since the beginning of 5.9, but apparently in a retired position, perhaps modestly behind her husband or aunt, so that her stepping out becomes a satisfying coup de théâtre, suddenly becoming the focus for all eyes, onstage and in the audience. Her cue seems to be Compass’s charge of infanticide.
72 ill token unfortunate evidence.
73 wished . . . another hoped I too would have a healthy baby some day.
74 The . . . plain As Happé points out, ‘The crying of the child is a presumptive element in the law.’ The cry is confirmation of a live birth in a case of infanticide, ‘a crime more severely punished after the statue of 1624 “to Prevent the Murthering of Bastard Children”. Aimed against unmarried mothers, the statute decreed that if a woman concealed a birth and her baby died, she was judged guilty of killing it, unless she could prove that her child had been born dead’ (Mendelson and Crawford, 1998, 44–5, citing 21 Jas.1, c. 27). As Practice explains, hiding a pregnancy and merely concealing a birth, even without infanticide, are also punishable crimes, rendering all the women accessories after the fact. Compass includes Sir Moth and Dr Rut as accessories at 77–8 below. For the historical overview of illegitimate births, including the incidence of abortion and infanticide, see Amussen (1988), ch. 4, especially 111–18.
76 felony serious crime, including murder, manslaughter, large-scale theft, and being accessory to such crime before or after the fact (Cowell, 1607, LEME).
79 turn a business reverse or change the direction of the current situation (OED, Turn, 22a).
80 shrewd evil, having injurious or dangerous consequences (OED, 3, 4). A ‘shrewd turn’, implied by Palate’s response to ‘turn’ (79), was a malicious act (OED, 5a)
80 start at’t flinch, begin to panic at the prospect.
81 right thread Cf. the ‘skein of silk’ and ‘right end’, Ind. 105–6ff.
83 A legal courtroom formula; cf. Dent, T590; Tub, 2.6.31–2; and below 102, 106.
84 prevented of deprived of (OED, 6). That is, Polish, like Volpone uncasing, prefers to reveal her own truths; cf. Volp., 5.12.85.
84 glories actions worth boasting about (OED, 3).
85 own (1) admit; (2) exert control over.
86 lucre monetary gain derived from (OED, 2a cites this usage).
87 event gamble, what follows a course of action.
89 SD] this edn, following G; not in F2
90 unto . . . it] this edn; parenthetical in F2
90 profess acknowledge (OED, 2c, Massinger, The Roman Actor, Dedication).
91 mere absolute (OED, 4).
91 false-stick deceiver; a derogatory nonce-word combining measurement, class, and sexuality, based on punning meanings of ‘stick’ as ‘a kind of measure like a yard’, appropriate for a tailor’s work, and ‘a man’s yard or privy member’ (Florio, 1598, LEME). The name Needle also suggests ‘penis’ (OED, 16), the basis for jokes at least as far back as Gammer Gurton’s Needle (1575), although the first OED citation is 1592.
92 wise knight Interest.
92 change] F2 state 2; change, state 1
93 assuring betrothing, making sure of; cf. 5.8.47.
95 clapping . . . on making a bargain (OED, 7), usually by shaking hands; cf. ‘so clap hands and a bargain’, H5, 5.1.125.
98 unnatural] F2 unnaturall state 2; unnarurall state 1
103 whom Mistress Compass.
103 pay] F2 state 2; pay, state 1
106 truth Cf. 83, 102 above.
109 coz’nage trickery, cheating.
110 noose] Wh; noofe F2
112 brake snare, usually made of string or coarse thread to make a running noose; figuratively, dilemma (OED, 6).
116 pick out unpick.
116 basting loosely sewed (OED, v.1).
118 whore (A moralistic overstatement.)
120 cheat trick.
120 yet now.
121 ’bate abate, reduce.
121 No . . . gives Not a penny of what I am entitled to by law.
122 Bias’s money i.e. the garnish money (see 42 above).
123 I will not seize your prey nor your pleasure in acquiring it. Interest has had the fun of the chase, and now he has to pay for his attempted piracy. Compass will not deduct Interest’s expenses from the total portion owed to Pleasance.
123 purchase catching or seizing of prey, robbery (OED, 1, 8); cf. Alch., 4.7.122.
124 here.] this edn; here, F2
124 all together –] this edn; altogether. F2
125 Birds . . . feather Proverbial: ‘Birds of a feather will flock together’ (Dent, B393).
126 reconciled joined or knit together as friends; brought back into favour or put at peace (Thomas, 1587, LEME), according to the play’s subtitle; cf. Ind. 72–86 (and Pleasure Reconciled to Virtue).
127 gratuity sign of favour, gift; from gratia (Lat.), a pleasing quality, gratitude or thanks. Cf. Jonson’s 1631 letter to the Earl of Newcastle, Letter 19, 4–6, in which the poet explains his use of the term to describe a gift of money: ‘I style it such, for it fell like the dew of heaven on my necessities, it came so opportunely and in season.’ Ironside’s need is not so dire, but in the lady’s eyes, he is as worthy a recipient.
129 nephew Because married to her niece.
130 amends recovery; reparation for a fault or trespass (Palsgrave, LEME).
130 amends:] this edn; amends, F2
132 travail] F2 (travell)
135 tendered handed over.
136 As good . . . last Proverbial: ‘As good do it first as last’ (Dent, F294).
136 SH] F3; not in F2
138 Give him myself i.e. in marriage.
140 honour] 1716; houre F2
141 study his set my mind to complementing his honour.
144 under your colours for your sake, under your flag or patronage.
145 cap cover, in tune with the magnetic metaphor. See The Persons that Act, 8n.
147 forlorn (1) abject, desperate (Minsheu, 1599, LEME); (2) past grace (Cawdrey, 1617, LEME); (3) needy, beggarly, destitute: ‘The wretched or succourless estate of one that hath not a friend left to help him; . . . pitifull estate of orphans, left to look unto or shift for themselves’ (Cotgrave, 1611, LEME). Ironside echoes a military expression, ‘forlorn hope’, or ‘perdu’, soldier past hope of recovery, exposed to perilous battle which he will not survive; cf. 3.5.122n. and EMO, 5.6.54.
148 thread Placentia. Compass has ‘the right thread’, Pleasance (81 above). This is the final needlework reference to the play’s plot, beginning with the ‘thread of the argument’ and ‘the skein of silk’, Ind. 105ff.
151 magnetic See The Persons that Act, 1n.
151 SD] G; not in F2
152 ] in right margin, The end. F2
Chorus 5 ] this edn; CHORUS / Changed into an Epilogve: / To the KING. F2, centred
Chorus 5 0 SD changed In revising the final chorus into an epilogue, Jonson may have suppressed concluding business between Probee, Damplay, and the Boy, but, as in the finale of EMO, the only response left to the onstage audience is to refuse to criticize further, and defer to the offstage audience’s applause.
0.1 SD] this edn; not in F2
1 under seal Cf. 4.2.36 and 39 and notes.
2 waive you forfeit you gentlemen of the chorus; put you aside.
2 appeal] F2 state 2; appeale, state 1
5 our the actors’.
6 he Jonson, the poet.
6 halts limps.
7 he . . . him the King will judge or make the final decision on the poet. The same conclusion marks the end of EMO, in which Macilente is judged worthy by the Queen herself, in the play’s original catastrophe, thus completing the idea of shaping the perfect spectator for Jonson’s play in the figure of the monarch whose judicious authority cannot be surpassed. Cf. epilogue to the court performance of Bart. Fair.
7 To In deference to.
7 voice, stands These are terms of election: voice, vote, expressed opinion, approval (OED, 2c, 3); cf. Cor., 3.1.3–5; and stands, submits to the sentence; but also offers himself as a worthy candidate (OED, 11a, 12).
8 prefers values, esteems or sets more by; gives one the charge of a thing as overseer or ruler (Thomas, 1587, LEME).
8 ’fore all the people’s hands before or instead of the common audience’s opinions expressed through applause, or lack thereof. Cf. ‘Populo ut placerent . . . Quas fecissent fabulas’, Ind. 32–3n. This line probably refers to the play’s poor reception in the public theatre.
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